Trapped

by Sally Mason

  I shrink in my seat, feeling incredibly worthless and despicable. “It was only a small cut.”

  He refuses to play my game. “A cut is a cut, Kels. You know how I feel about self-harm. It’s stupid and won’t solve any of your problems.”

  A cold claw clenches my chest. “It makes me feel better.”

  “I understand that it’s a coping mechanism, but it’ll never erase your real pain. You might think you feel better for a little while, but that’s just an illusion. Causing more wounds won’t help to heal those scars in the end.”

  I don’t want to talk about it anymore and punish him with silence. He doesn’t seem to mind, leaning back on the bench with his eyes closed, enjoying the sunshine. My focus returns to the school gate, but Justin and Cynthia are gone. Most of the area in front of the building is deserted. Only a few guys are throwing a football.

  A boy is sitting in the grass, his back resting against a tree. His eyes follow the football jocks with a smirk. He absentmindedly pulls a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lights himself a smoke. I’m baffled by his open display of defiance—the school has a strict no-smoking policy. He’ll be suspended if caught by a teacher.

  He inhales deeply and blows the smoke in the direction of the boys with the football. His “don’t care” attitude is annoying. I eye his stereotypical bad boy outfit with a wrinkled nose—black jeans, biker boots, and a black muscle tank that highlights his wide chest. A leather jacket is tossed casually in the grass beside him—what an idiot. His rebellious appearance might work up in Lewiston or maybe even down in Portland, but not here, in the sheltered community of Stonehenge. In this town, most boys and girls are churchgoing goody-two-shoes with parents who do not approve of guys like him. He must be a fairly new arrival who has yet to learn the error of his ways.

  “Hey, Luke, do you know that guy?”

  His gaze moves in the direction of my pointed finger. “Yeah, that’s Finn. Don’t you remember? He’s Andrew Walker’s nephew and used to come up here in the summer with his brother. We went to kayak camp together a few times.”

  I vaguely remember. He ran in a different crowd, already a troublemaker back then. “What’s he doing here?”

  “Oh, he just moved from Connecticut. Apparently, he got into some trouble back home and they kicked him out of school. Rumor has it that he is on his second attempt of senior year, but Maya said he’s likely not going to make it. His grades must be terrible and he cuts a lot of classes.”

  I chuckle and almost feel sorry for him—Finn has probably no idea that he is the center of the town’s juicy gossip. Maya, the sister of Luke’s girlfriend, Rhonda, is the biggest newsmonger around and will keep everyone diligently informed about any of his mischief.

  Luke stretches. “We should get home. Rhonda and I want to catch a movie up in Auburn tonight.” He winks at me. “Care to tag along?”

  “Nope. I have plans of my own.”

  “Do those involve leaving the house?”

  I glare at him. “What do you want from me? I already took a shower and this stupid walk. Isn’t that enough to prove that I’m trying?”

  “Don’t expect a medal from me, Kels. It has been three years and hiding in your room is not the answer.”

  Not again. Why can’t he and my mom understand that memories don’t just fade away because a certain time frame has elapsed?

  I glance one more time at Finn, who flips the football jocks a bird, causing some shouts to float our way. One guy is turning red in the face while Finn laughs off his insults. I just silently shake my head. Somebody needs to put him in his place with that type of attitude.

  I follow Luke to his truck and slide into the passenger seat, buckling up. As we drive by the high school where Finn and Red Face have advanced to pushing each other, the words “fuck you” assault my ears. I frown—what a jerk.

  Halfway home, Luke pulls into a gas station and fills up the tank. Just when he is about done, his phone rings. He hands me a twenty-dollar bill. “Could you run in and pay? I need to get this.”

  I grab the money and stroll inside, thirst suddenly bubbling in my throat. The clerk has his back turned as I walk in, his nose stuck in a magazine. The cooler is right beside the door and I study the selection of drinks before reaching for a peach iced tea.

  “Excuse me, do you also have this in lem—?” A small yelp springs from my lips when the clerk turns around to face me. The bottle escapes my hands and crashes onto the floor. When the cap pops off, iced tea splatters all over my shoes and pants, but I barely notice the mess.

  The clerk sneers. “Oh, hey, honeybun. Haven’t seen you in a while.”

  An invisible force wraps around my throat and I gasp for air, cold sweat spilling from every pore of my body. Before I can faint, my hand reaches for the water cooler to steady myself. My eyes are fixed on him like a mouse on a snake while I continue to breathe heavily. All my mind registers at that very moment is one single thought. What in the hell is Jed Edwards doing here?

  CHAPTER 2

  I stare at Jed with an open mouth. My mind screams for me to run and hide—anything to get away from him—but my legs refuse to move. When tears pool in my eyes, some of my brain’s commands finally reach their destination. In a daze, I slap the twenty-dollar bill on the counter and dart from the store.

  Luke’s truck seems to be at an unattainable distance, and I don’t even make it halfway there before breaking down on my knees. The sting in my chest is unbearable when my lungs come up short of oxygen with every breath I take. I feel I’m about to choke. My arms wrap around me as I rock back and forth, sobs mixing with low whimpers.

  Luke’s hand weighs a ton on my shoulder when he squats down next to me. “Kels, what’s wrong?”

  I point at the store while struggling for air, black dots dancing in front of my eyes. My lips form silent words, but no sound escapes. As I have so many times before, I curse my worthless body. He tries to pull me into his arms, but I slap him away, unable to stand his touch.

  Finally, I manage to croak the word “Jed” in between tear spurts.

  He goes rigid, sucking in a deep breath. “Is the jerk in there?”

  I nod, digging my fingernails into his sweater when he slowly rises. “Don’t.”

  He ignores my plea and marches toward the store with a stony face. Crazy thoughts race through my mind, imagining all kinds of impending doom—Luke hurt in a physical altercation or even shot. I force myself back on my feet and follow him with slumped shoulders.

  The situation is already hairy when I step through the door. Jed is pinned against the wall, Luke right in his face. “What the hell did you do to my sister?”

  Jed, who doesn’t seem fazed at all by Luke’s assault, offers him a smug smile. “Nothing, man. I just said hello and she totally freaked out.”

  “What are you even doing back in town, asshole?”

  Jed snorts. “It’s a free country. I can live wherever I want and I just really like it here.”

  “Well, that was a big mistake.” Luke raises his fist. “No one wants you here.”

  “Luke, don’t,” I cry in a feeble attempt to stop him. “You know what happened the last time.”

  Jed’s eyes come to rest on me. “Yeah, listen to your sister, man. If you beat me up again, I’ll press charges, and this time, you won’t get away with community service.”

  Luke’s face is full of struggle. When his gaze falls on the camera above the counter, his arm drops. “I swear this is not over, Jed. If I were you, I would get the hell out of town before someone jumps you from behind in a dark alley. You have a lot of enemies around.”

  “Sure I do.” Jed’s tongue runs over his lips as he gives me a good once-over. “But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m walking around a free man while your sister here is still screwed.” He laughs. “And I mean that literally.”

  I lower my eyes when a few tears trickle down my cheeks, my breath heavy again. “Please, Luke, let’s just go.”


  With a growl, he releases Jed and grabs my hand. I allow him to whisk me away after glancing one more time at my tormentor. Jed’s glare burns into my back as I walk to the truck. The fact he knows what’s underneath these clothes and would probably love nothing more than to tear them off stabs painfully at my insides.

  On the way home, I fight the nausea while Luke rants and rages about the injustice. Most of his words fall on deaf ears. I’m captured in my own little world, thinking back to the moment when I first woke up after my abduction.

  It was dark, the scent in the air musty. A shudder ran through me when a cold breeze hit me, goosebumps covering my body. I realized I was naked. My throat was raw and it hurt every time I swallowed, a foul taste coating the inside of my mouth. A pounding headache overpowered the rest of my senses.

  I turned my head toward the screeching door and instinctively curled into a ball when a dark figure entered. The light came on and I blinked. My eyes teared from the sudden brightness.

  “Good, you’re awake.”

  My heart cringed in my chest at the slyness in Jed’s soft voice.

  “Why did you bring me here?” I bit my trembling lip, trying to give my words some firmness. Though I wanted to scream, my instincts told me that getting myself all worked up wouldn’t get me anywhere.

  He lowered himself onto the bed next to me and ran his fingers down my back. I recoiled from his touch, sickness cramping my stomach.

  “I’m sure you know the answer to that, honeybun.” His eyes were greedy when they wandered up and down my frame. “You’re a terrible tease, always parading around in those short tight skirts and flirting with guys any chance you get. You drive me crazy, but all you’ve ever had for me was ridicule. Whatever happens, you brought this on yourself.”

  Tears dribbled from my eyes. “I’m sorry, I never meant to upset you. Please, Jed, just let me go. I swear I won’t tell anyone that you kidnapped me.”

  He clicked his tongue. “Kidnapping is such an ugly word. You should see it more as an invitation to an extended party.” He tried to roll me on my back, but I hugged my knees with such force that he couldn’t break my grip. He laughed wickedly. “If you continue to be such a prude, I’ll have to tie you down.”

  His words were like a fist, punching into my stomach. “Please, Jed, I’m still a virgin. Don’t do this.”

  His thumb caressed my wet cheek. “Don’t you think I know that, honeybun?” He sighed. “Unfortunately, I lost the coin toss, so my friend will do the honor. He’ll be over later.” His eyes filled with darkness. “If you’re a good girl and let me take a peek, I’ll bring you some food and water.”

  I didn’t move, my head spinning. Somehow, I needed to escape.

  “Suit yourself. Just so you know, you’re underground and there’s no one around who can hear you scream. The door is solid metal with three different locks. You’re trapped, honeybun. You can either make this a whole lot easier and cooperate, or fuss and learn the hard way that we mean business.”

  When he walked toward the door and had his back turned, I seized the opportunity and jumped him. Luke had shown me a few self-defense moves when we were wrestling out back for fun, but my feeble attempts were no match for the number one lightweight contender in the state. One punch knocked me out cold. I didn’t wake up until later with my arms and legs tied to the bedposts, my head bursting from pain.

  I screamed for help at the top of my lungs until my voice was hoarse and reduced to a whisper. As Jed predicted, no one came to my rescue. I was trapped and at their mercy.

  When Luke’s hand brushes over my arm, I almost jump out of my seat.

  “You look really upset.” His eyes are filled with worry. “Do you want to talk about it?”

  I lean back in my seat, trying to calm my ragged breath. “Talk about what?”

  “You’ve never told anyone what actually happened and keep everything bottled inside. Maybe if you confided in someone, it would help you to process the trauma.”

  I roll my eyes—Dr. Stromberg is already constantly on my case about opening up. Last thing I need is his probing. “I was raped, Luke. What’s more to say?”

  “Well, how do you feel about it now?”

  I glare out of the window with empty eyes. “You can search the Internet about the experiences of rape survivors.”

  “I don’t want to know about a bunch of strangers.” The words are sharp with a hint of anger. “All I care about is my sister. Why are you even fighting me here, Kels? Don’t you know I’m in your corner?”

  “I’m just not ready, Luke.” I pinch the bridge of my nose, trying to fight the oncoming headache.

  He opens his mouth, but I cut him off.

  “And don’t tell me again that it has been three years. I need more time and I’m tired of people trying to rush me.”

  He sighs. “Fair enough.” His hand comes to rest on my lower arm and squeezes gently. “Just promise me that you won’t do anything stupid in the meantime. No more cutting or other form of self-harm.”

  I avoid his searching eyes. “I swear,” I say—damn well knowing that this is not a promise I intend to keep.

  When I get home, I dash into my room, just to be ordered back downstairs by my mom.

  “Kelsey, dinner is almost ready.”

  I know she won’t give up and will insist on me joining the happy family get together. Her plans apparently include an all-night torture—Roy is just starting the grill when I step onto the porch. Luke breaks out the old badminton set from the garage and approaches me with a wide grin.

  “Come on, grouchy, let’s play.”

  I just shake my head. “I don’t feel like playing. Didn’t you have plans with Rhonda tonight?”

  “Not anymore.” He starts to bounce the shuttlecock on the string bed. “I cancelled after, you know . . .”

  He allows his words to trail off and I eye my mom and Roy.

  “You didn’t tell them, right?” My mom would freak out again and I can’t handle that right now.

  “Nope, I didn’t say a word”—he catches the feathered ball—“but I will if you continue to be such a whiner.”

  I can’t believe he is blackmailing me, but I am not prepared to take any chances. With a small growl, I grab the racket and soon we’re bouncing the shuttlecock around. The basics come back to me quite quickly and I actually find the game a little fun. With every hit of the racket, a little piece of today’s memories is pushed further and further to the back of my mind.

  “I saw that.” Luke laughs.

  My eyes narrow. “What?”

  “That little smile you were trying to suppress.”

  I give him my best impression of Grumpy Cat. “Oh, shut up.”

  We continue our game until the aroma of grilled meat taunts my nostrils. My stomach grumbles. I’m famished for a change and toddle into the kitchen to help my mom. As I cut the tomatoes for the salad, Luke sets the table, chatting away with his father about some upcoming baseball game. For a moment, my heart aches with nostalgia—that’s how it was almost every weekend before my abduction. Back then, I had stupid fights with my mom half the time and didn’t even appreciate my easy-going existence.

  When the steaks are done, we gather around the table. I pile up my plate with meat and corn on the cob. The food is delicious and the light atmosphere continues until almost the end of the meal. That’s when Roy returns me to my harsh reality.

  “Detective Larouge called today to inform me that Jed Edwards is back in town.”

  Luke gives me this “should I tell them, or will you” look.

  “We ran into him at the Easy Mart,” I fess up. “He works there.”

  “Oh my god, what if he takes Kelsey again?” My mom’s hand is clutched over her mouth. “You have to do something, Roy. Can’t you file a restraining order?”

  “Unfortunately, I can’t. Since the charges were dismissed, there’s no basis. Unless he threatens Kelsey, the law is on his side.” His fingers wrap around my mom’s h
and. “Don’t worry, honey. Nick agrees that the chances he will kidnap Kelsey again are slim to none since everyone would immediately point the finger at him. Not even he is that dumb.”

  “I still want Kelsey to be careful.” Her lips have that overprotective poutiness to them that I used to hate. “One of us should be with her when she leaves the house, and hopefully, he’ll disappear again soon. Don’t you play tennis with the owner of the Easy Mart? I mean, if Jed lost that job—” Her gaze drops when she meets her husband’s frown. Usually, Roy is straighter than an arrow and only calls in these types of favors when he absolutely has to.

  “Okay, I’ll talk to him,” he says when her eyes fill with tears.

  Trying to ignore the growing unrest in the pit of my stomach, I pick at the last pieces of my salad to distract myself. With my mom’s worry, my daily walks will most likely be suspended, something that would have been beyond thrilling just hours ago. The prospect that I could bump into Jed at any given moment is nerve-racking. On top of that, her smothering will become unbearable.

  Roy’s clearing of the throat finally breaks the uncomfortable silence that has fallen over the table. “Did anything else happen with Jed I should know about?”

  Luke stuffs the last piece of steak in his mouth. “Nothing,” he says while chewing.

  Roy’s eyebrows quirk. “That’s not what I heard. Jed called the station and claimed you threatened him.”

  “It’s unbelievable that he can complain and we can’t,” my mom pipes in with a huff. “It’s so unjust.”

  “I know, honey, but that’s just the way it is.” Roy pats her hand without taking his eyes off his son; he is obviously still waiting for his side of the story.

  Luke and I exchange a glance. “He was way out of line, Dad, and really upset Kelsey. I swear I didn’t touch him.”

  Roy gazes at me and I confirm Luke’s story with a nod.