Christmas Cowboy

by Claire Adams

  “I can’t believe you still haven’t told him. And, if he’s jealous over the doctor, he’s always going to have a problem with you working with him. I’ve seen that too many times. He must have it bad for you.” She wasn’t helping my panic, which had turned into a full-blown attack. I was trembling all over, and I had to take a few deep breaths and sit down. Even though I tried to calm myself, it did no good. It was as if I had no control over my own body.

  “Hey, calm down.” Bre put the coffee down in front of me, and I pulled it to my lips with shaky hands and sipped.

  “I’m trying. I can’t believe I let it get this messed up. I really like him, Bre. He could be the one, he really could. And it just happened, like that. I hadn’t planned on any of this.”

  “Are you in love with him?” She had a pained expression on her face and clutched her collar.

  “I’m pretty sure I am. He’s all I can think about, and I’m kicking myself now for screwing it all up. I figured he was so cold at first that it would be impossible for him to like me. But now he’s talking commitments, and I’m stuck being Lexa Lively.”

  She giggled. “That sounds like a porn star’s name. I bet he thinks it hot.” She sipped her mug of coffee, and I let out a breath. There she was not helping again.

  “The sex…it’s amazing.” She laughed, and I realized I’d made the claim like it was something she couldn’t fathom. But then I straightened up in my chair and took another sip of coffee while the silence grew between us. After a moment, I decided she was right.

  I slapped my palm on the table to cut the silence. “I think I will approach my parents first. Believe it or not, they’re much less frightening. And if they disown me, I’d hardly notice.”

  She swirled her coffee in the mug staring down into the dark liquid. “Come on, your mother and your father both have soft spots. They’ve been through hell, the both of them, and you’ve taken a lot of the brunt of their grieving, but they love you and want the best for you. Who knows, your mother might like the idea of you dating him even more. I mean, that would bring her closer to all of his money, and not only a part of it.”

  “That actually might be true, but you heard them. They think he’s an asshole. They’ll probably think he’s trying to pull a fast one and make me fall for him, so he doesn’t have to pay up.” I had seen my mother in action too many times, and I didn’t think getting her to give up anything for me would be that easy.

  “Yeah, well, things change when love is involved.” She shrugged.

  “Stop saying that word. It makes my stomach knot.” My phone rang, and I glanced down to see that Aiden had texted. “That’s him now.”

  “Well, answer him. You can’t ignore him forever.”

  “I have for the past day.” My shoulders dropped like all the air had been let out of me.

  Bre’s eyes widened. “I’m surprised he hasn’t come looking for you. You should say something. Tell him you’re working.”

  “I don’t want to ignore him. I want to be with him, but I’m such a chicken-hearted loser. Maybe I should just tell him. Like right now.”

  Bre reached over and took my phone. “I’m not letting you do something that hasty, especially through a text.”

  “I was thinking maybe you could tell him, like through a text, maybe anonymously. Then I won’t have to do anything. He’ll stop calling, and I’ll go on hating myself as much as I do now.”

  “You’re talking crazy, Lexa. You’re not this person.” Her hand fell across my arm, warm and reassuring.

  “Exactly, that’s crazy Lexa Lively talking.” I remembered his words again, the ones that had been haunting me. “He even told me the other day how much he hates my greedy parents and then added that he hates liars just as much.”

  “I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could do. But other than keeping your phone out of reach until your urge of insanity has passed, I’m not sure what I’m good for.” The phone sounded, and she met my eyes.

  “Check it. It’s probably him.” I nudged her, but before she looked, she took a deep breath.

  “He said he misses you and wants you to come by. Then he said ‘we need to talk.’” The thing vibrated again, and her eyes widened. That was it. He knew. He’d said something horrible, and she was clearly reacting. But then her face reddened, and she put the phone down on the table.

  “What?”

  “He said he’s been picturing you spread out on Shelby and he needs a nurse. Who the hell is Shelby? Is there something you’re not telling me?” I couldn’t help but laugh, but Bre’s eyes widened, and she was holding my phone ransom until I told her. I tried to pry it out from under her hand, but she shook her head. “Seriously, who is Shelby?”

  “Shelby is a car, I swear.” I finally pried my phone away and glanced at the text. As upset as I was, I wanted to be his nurse. I wanted to message his back and flirt and play like nothing was wrong between us. I was seriously damaged.

  “So, you spread out on his car? Don’t answer that.” She got up and went to put her cup in the sink, turning on the water to rinse it out.

  I glanced down at the phone with the first smile of the day spread across my lips.

  “Look at you, smiling like there isn’t a care in the world. He does something to you, and I’m not sure it’s healthy, especially if he’s doing it to you on a car.”

  “On a car, the shower, the dining table, the couch, his bed… Oh, and there was that one time at work.”

  “At work? Lexa, seriously?”

  “Yeah, I told you, it’s amazing. He’s hands down the sexiest man I know. And, I can’t tell him no. Even at work.” She leaned against the counter and stared at the floor. “Don’t act like you’re so innocent. I’ve known you my whole life. You’ve done it across your desk, and you screwed your boss.”

  She lifted her head and glanced around me to the living room where Daniel was lost in a television show. “Keep it down. I’m not judging you. Just promise you’ll be careful.”

  “I’m always careful.”

  “Famous last words, Lexa. Famous. Last. Words.”

  I couldn’t dispute her one bit. I’d already been a fool from the start with Aiden.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Aiden

  With everything going on, at least my morning routine was getting back to normal with another trip to the gym. I had a lot on my mind that needed processing and I’d always used the gym, especially through law school, to sort out what was going on in my life. It put me in focus better than anything else. I sat on the bench working my arms and keeping to myself by avoiding the stares from some of the women, and a certain man who hadn’t stopped staring since I showed up. Sorry, bro, I’m not your type.

  There had been so much to consider with the lawsuit hanging over my head and with taking that next step with Lexa. She’d been so preoccupied with work, but that hadn’t stopped her from taking care of me.

  The day before, which turned into the most interesting Sunday morning, started out with a phone call after her late shift. I don’t know how the girl finds the energy, but she had me stroking my cock on her drive home — which ended on my doorstep instead. She’d commanded me not to stop what I was doing as I went to the door, and I had obliged. She had her shirt open for me when I threw open the door. That was a good thing because her buttons would have been a two-handed job, and I had my commands.

  She’d taken my hand, the one that wasn’t busy, and led me to the nearest chair, a high back velveteen number with elaborately-carved wooden arms, and finished the job by giving me the hottest blowjob of my life. Then I carried her upstairs for round two, and as usual, when we were together, everything else in the world faded away.

  That was how it always was with Lexa. The two of us were so wrapped up in each other nothing else mattered, but when we were apart, she was wrapped up in work and I had the looming lawsuit.

  I finished my workout and showered before heading out with all intentions of going back home to ki
ll some time, but something inside craved a more productive day. It was time I got a handle on things. On my life, my career, my finances for the future, or at least what would be left of them.

  I ended up pulling into the parking garage at the office, and what do you know, my father’s reserved spot was waiting. I pulled the Shelby into the space and killed the engine before straightening my collar. I reached in the glove box, knowing my dad’s emergency tie was still there and gave it a once over, hoping it didn’t have a coffee or mustard stain. I ran the length through my fingers for the all clear and tied it on. I got out of the car and was greeted by Layne’s secretary, who used to work for my father.

  “Good morning, Mr. Walker.” She gave me a curt nod and continued on her way, her steps picking up their pace. I had that effect on people there, and I was okay with it. It humored me in a sadistic way, and I laughed inside, thinking how she better get used to seeing me.

  At least until the lawsuit was settled and she followed Layne wherever he went. She could suck his dick in a new office just as easy. The same way she’d done my father’s.

  She wasn’t fooling me. I knew who she’d been with and for how long, and as soon as his body turned cold, she’d leaned on Layne for comfort. He’d even been foolish enough to put her up in a new place, but according to him, his conscience had gotten the best of him, and he was on the mend with his wife. No matter to me. It would all change soon enough.

  I walked into the office with the usual greetings, a few hellos, but more heads turning away and feet changing direction, especially after my last outburst. I headed straight to my father’s office and went inside. Nothing had been touched except for the things Layne had taken, which to his credit, were necessary. No one had defaced Dad’s office by stripping away anything unnecessary.

  I glanced down at his chair and without remorse, planted my ass. He would have been proud to see me there — at least that’s what Layne had been trying to convince me of during all the past months of trying to lure me to pick up where he left off. He hadn’t seen it coming to this, I was sure of that, and he was equally shocked to see me sitting there an hour later when he finally came out of his office.

  I’d been on the computer looking over my finances and making plans to move forward when he passed by and did his double-take. I’d left the door open deliberately to intimidate anyone passing by. No one had bothered me up until then.

  “Aiden?” Layne strode in wearing a wrinkled suit and doing his best to look alert. A young lady, half Layne’s age, if a day, came walking out of his office behind him straightening her skirt.

  So that’s why he wasn’t seeing his secretary anymore. Knowing she’d left the building some time ago, I could imagine what was going on in Layne’s office for the past hour. “Still fucking around on the job I see.” The woman’s head turned so fast I thought she might get whiplash, but after I gave her a wink and a wave she turned and scuttled away.

  “Jesus, Aiden.” He glanced around to see if anyone else was listening, but that end of the office was dead, and now it was clear why. No one wanted to be within ten feet of what was going on behind closed doors, and it was yet another reason Layne was about to find himself on his own. “Stop giving me that holier-than-thou attitude.”

  “Don’t worry; I won’t ask how Mrs. Connor is doing. But maybe you should have your new assistant send her some flowers. You know, to show them both their place.” My face warmed with a sly grin, but the humor was lost on Layne.

  “To what do I owe your sudden interest in your father’s computer?” His smile was friendly, but his tone was laden with a heavy dose of fuck you.

  “I have to make plans for when this suit blows up in my face.” I didn’t trust him to pick up the pieces.

  He walked in and closed the door. “Well, it’s a good thing you’re here. I was about to call you.”

  “Good to know my personal fucking comes after your own.” I leaned back in my father’s chair and crossed my arms behind my head.

  “Very funny.” He rolled his eyes and shook his head. Not a denial.

  “So, what was so urgent you had to stop at one nut?” The remark earned me a glare as he took the chair across from me.

  “It’s time to get serious, Aiden. The Pattersons’ new evidence is a video recovered from Shawn’s cellphone that puts your father in the pilot’s seat when the crash occurred. It was recovered along with what was left of his body. Apparently, the phone was damaged, but still worked well enough to transfer the file. They hired an investigator since the black box evidence was… Well, it was unattainable.”

  “Why was it unattainable? It should be available for both sides-”

  The look on his face was proof enough that he’d had something to do with that. “You knew?”

  “I didn’t know there was going to be other evidence. I was trying to protect your family and ensure that there wouldn’t be any issues that could close us down.”

  “Dammit, Layne, you should have considered that could backfire.”

  “I didn’t withhold anything; I just asked to draw out the process for obtaining. I had no idea there was going to be a fucking cellphone video.”

  “What exactly does it have? I want to see it. See if you can keep your dick in your pants long enough to find that fucking tape.”

  “I’m already working on it.” He held up a hand as if it would make his argument stronger, but I sank back in my chair wondering what the fuck my father was doing flying that plane with passengers — with our family on board — and wondering if it were possible it was his arrogance that had killed my mother and sister.

  My stomach turned as Layne kept talking. Suddenly, he was all about his job. My dad had trusted the man, but I didn’t trust my father. As I thought of all the days Layne knew my father might be responsible for the crash and didn’t tell me, it pissed me off more.

  But I was more angry with myself. I’d let things go, left my responsibilities with Layne instead of dealing with them myself. The guy had done what he thought was best, the way my father would have done them.

  But that was the problem. I wasn’t my father. I took responsibility for my actions. Didn’t I?

  I thought of all the months I’d been out of it, angry at the world for taking away my family, so angry that I’d zoned out and let myself and my responsibilities go. I was as much to blame as Layne, if not more.

  That time was over. I was waking up to a mess, but at least I was awake. Mourning time was over. Grieving to the point of incapacitation was no longer an option, and with Lexa in my life, I had something to look forward to, even if everything else went to shit. Even if I lost Olde House in the process, I’d find my home with her.

  “We’ve got a week until the hearing. I’ll make sure you get the tape before then. I won’t let you walk in blind. And, I’ll see about the black box recording. You might be able to make out more from that than I could.

  “I really thought I was doing the right thing, Aiden. I know you think I’m an asshole, but I’m the closest thing to family you’ve had in a while. That isn’t lost on me. I’ve tried to do my best for the both of us because I knew you were going through hell.” I couldn’t argue with him. He had kept things together when I hadn’t.

  “I know. I’m sorry I put you in that position. It won’t happen again. But tell me, is there anything else I should know. Anything else you’ve done to protect the firm?” I believed him when he shook his head. “Then let me know when it’s in. I’m going to hang around another hour or two. I guess it’s time I get a job.”

  “Your father would be glad to hear that.” He stood and reached across my desk to put a hand on my shoulder when I huffed. “All he ever wanted was for you to follow in his footsteps.”

  “No offense, but I couldn’t give a shit right now about what he wanted. The only two people who matter now are my mother and sister. I’ll make them proud.” Layne nodded his head and then without another word, left the room.

  I glanced at the
family pictures my dad had across the room on the table near the window and caught a glimpse of my mother and Ally at Ally’s graduation. There was another of Ally and me as children playing on the beach, with our father buried up to his neck in the sand. My mother had taken the picture, and I remembered the sun had been so warm. If I closed my eyes, I could still feel the breeze across my face.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Lexa

  Work had been hectic, but I managed to keep my head in the game. Considering I was on thin ice with Dr. Rob, it was a good thing. He hadn’t mentioned going out again since Aiden’s call, and I was still kicking myself for the response I’d given him and Aiden’s reaction.

  I’d only been on break for five minutes when the next emergency came in, and since we were short-handed, I had to go back to work. This was after already missing break once before, but patients don’t wait to see if you’re all done with your power bar before having a problem.

  So far, I’d dealt with a fishhook removal, two severed limbs, and a man that had been jolted with enough electricity to cook one of his fingers. I’d had the usual patients, the type we get every day, too — men passing kidney stones and women in premature labor, or the panicked mother bringing her baby in for a simple cough. There had been three heart attacks and many bumps and bruises, and finally, when it was time to catch a moment, more trouble walked through the door.

  “Flowers for a special lady.” It was Aiden. He’d found me on my way from the break room carrying a bright bouquet of roses. My heart sank. I didn’t know whether to run into his arms or run the other way.

  “Aiden, you shouldn’t have.” I glanced around to see one of my coworkers and her next patient smiling and giving nods of approval. I pulled him to an unused triage room and left the door open. “I’m sorry I haven’t had a moment to call.”