Christmas Cowboy

by Claire Adams

  Gretchen's eyelids fluttered briefly shut, and she groaned. “God, Christian,” she said. “You can't just say things like that.”

  “It's the truth, though,” I told her. “Look, I know I wasn't here for that long, and I know that we don't know each other all that well, but I feel like you somehow know me better than anyone else ever has before. And I love everything that I know about you. I don't want to live another day without you in my life. And I know that we need to talk about things, to figure out if we're going to live here or in, in California or somewhere else. I know that there's going to have to be compromises, and I know that I'm going to have to, to work at this. But can we please save that for later?”

  “You don't want to live another day without me in your life?” Gretchen asked, sounding awed.

  “That is, unless you'd rather be with Lino,” I said teasingly, even though I felt a stab of jealousy even thinking about it.

  Gretchen blushed brilliantly and shook her head. “I'd rather be with you,” she told me quietly. “I just didn't think I'd ever be able to have you.” Then, she clapped a hand over her mouth, clearly remembering our fight from New Year's Eve. “Not that I have you now; that's not what I meant.”

  I kissed her softly, slipping my tongue between her lips and sliding it languidly alongside hers. “You have me,” I told her as I pulled away, resting my forehead against hers. “You've always had me.”

  Gretchen smiled shyly up at me.

  “You don't have another appointment this afternoon, do you?” I asked.

  “No,” she said breathlessly. “That was the last one.”

  “Good,” I growled, possessively taking her hand. “Come on, let's get out of here.”

  Gretchen paused for a moment, just staring at me, and for a moment, I was afraid that she was reconsidering. But then, she said in a soft voice, “I'm glad you came back, Christian.”

  I smiled at her. “I'm glad I did, too.”

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Gretchen

  Despite the fact that we'd had sex a number of times already, there was something different about this time. Other than holding hands, we didn't touch until we reached the bedroom, and even there, we just stood there staring at one another for a long moment. Finally, Christian started to unbutton his shirt, clearly broadcasting his intentions.

  I took a deep breath and let my dress fall from my shoulders and into a shimmering puddle on the floor. Christian made a low sound, and I looked shyly up at him.

  “I somehow managed to forget how truly breathtaking you are,” he said, coming forward to cup my cheek in his palm, tilting my face up toward his. He stroked his thumb over my cheekbone, and I could sense that there was something else that he wanted to say, but he was still holding himself back. For once, though, it didn't bother me, his inability to voice his emotions. It wasn't as though I didn't know what he was thinking anyway.

  I climbed on the bed and lay back against the pillows, watching with lusty eyes as Christian stripped down to his boxers. Then, he grimaced. “I should probably have taken a shower before I came over to the shop,” he said. “I've been on airplanes since-”

  I interrupted him with a laugh. “I really, really don't care,” I told him.

  He looked almost bashful as he approached the bed, a new look for him. But I was starting to realize that this was all new to him. I hadn't been wrong when I'd suspected that I was lucky enough to see a side of Christian that no one else got to see.

  He nudged my knees apart and arranged himself in between them, hovering over me. For a long moment, his eyes continued to rake over my face, as though searching for any sign that I might not want this. Finally, I wriggled a little, gasping as his hard member slipped along the cleft between my legs. Sure, there were a couple of layers of fabric between us, but it made heat pool in my stomach regardless.

  “I'm glad you came back,” I repeated, my voice almost inaudible.

  Christian brushed back some of my hair and then bent to kiss my forehead. “I like you,” he said.

  I blinked up at him for a moment, surprised to hear him say the words. I could see his indecision there, could see the way he was waiting for my response. “I like you too,” I said softly.

  Christian nodded almost to himself and then slowly began to take me apart.

  It started with gentle kisses and little nips at the tender parts of my skin. He raked his fingernails lightly down my sides, making me shiver. He was rocking his hips against me, continuing the steady pressure of his erect member against the needy bundle of nerves between my legs.

  My teeth began to chatter, and Christian pulled away, frowning down at me. “Are you cold?” he asked, rubbing his hands over my arms.

  I shook my head, feeling embarrassed. “No, just really turned on,” I admitted.

  He blinked and then smiled as though I'd revealed some secret of the universe to him. Then, he began to lick and suck his way down the column of my neck to my breasts. For a moment, he hovered there, as though he were again asking for permission, or maybe sending up a little prayer of some sort?

  Then, I realized what it was. He was teasing me again.

  I groaned, flinging an arm over my eyes. “Christian, come on,” I said. “We've both admitted to needing this. Can you please just not tease me this one time?”

  He gave a small laugh and shook his head, leaning his forehead against my collarbone. “I wish this were just teasing,” he told me. “I'm trying not to come before I even get you properly naked.

  “Oh,” I said, the sound practically punched out of me.

  “Yeah.”

  After a moment, he took a shaky breath and let it out slowly. Then, he continued his path down my body, reaching behind me to remove my bra but barely pausing to lavish any attention on them before he was sliding my panties off.

  He stared deep into my eyes for a long moment once he'd positioned himself there. “Are you sure about this?” he finally asked, the strain of holding himself back evident in his voice.

  “Yes, yes,” I said impatiently. But I smiled at him, flattered that he had asked. I doubted he was this careful with his other women. But it was something that I didn't want to think about right now. Right now, I just wanted to concentrate on the reverent way he was looking at me, on the way he was gently squeezing my hand in his, on the way he was slowly sliding into my entrance, moving carefully and giving me time to adjust to his girth.

  When he was fully inside of me, he paused for a long moment. Then, he pulled slowly out and pushed back in, rocking his hips up at the end of the stroke, hitting that spot inside me that made my blood sing. I sighed, melting back against the bed, feeling something settle inside my heart.

  Christian bent down, kissing me again, sucking at my lower lip even as he continued to rock his hips rhythmically against mine, never faltering even though I could tell that he was just as close to climax as I was. He trailed his kisses along my jawline and then grazed his teeth across my earlobe, sending sparks shooting through my nerve endings.

  With each thrust of his hard length, he seemed to pierce deeper inside of me, until I was sure that I could feel him buried there in my very core, a throbbing and scorching flame of strength and desire. A deeper arousal curled through my stomach, and I crept my fingers down his side, bringing them to rest against his hip, making sure that he continued to push into me, giving me everything that I had ever needed and more.

  I blushed a little, watching the way Christian looked down at me, desire mixed with affection there in his face. Again, he reached up to brush back some of my long hair, his fingers leaving heated trails against my skin. He caressed my side again, and then suddenly he froze, biting his lower lip and squeezing his eyes shut, taking a few ragged breaths.

  “It's okay,” I said quietly. “You can come if you need to.” There was something incredibly sexy about seeing him come undone like this. But he still seemed to be holding back, and I couldn't help wondering why.

  He shook his head.
“Want you to come first,” he said stubbornly.

  I blinked up at him and then smiled. “Okay,” I said. “So, make me come.”

  This time, when Christian plunged into me, it was with none of the careful finesse of before. He moved with wild abandon, rotating his hips as he thrust so that every inch of my pussy was subject to his ministrations. I could feel the drag of his head against the sensitive skin there, but what I was most focused on was the way he twisted his fingers into mine, grasping firmly at my hand.

  It suddenly occurred to me that this whole time, no matter that we'd just been fucking, we'd been spelling out our feelings for each other in gestures. In our dates, in our hand-holding, in the way that he brushed back my hair and the way that I cried out his name. There had been nothing subtle about it. No wonder Mina had been able to tell how upset I was when he'd left.

  I gasped as he speared me once more with a deep, animalistic power to the movement. Claiming me as his, in a way that the bruising kisses had never really done. “Christian,” I whimpered, squeezing my eyes shut.

  “That's it, baby,” he murmured against my skin, as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. “That's it. Come for me.”

  And I did, unable to hold out any longer. It felt as though I was being wrung from the inside out, as though my whole world narrowed to these points of contact between the two of us. I could feel the way his breath caressed my skin, could feel the sweat beading between the two of us, slicking our skin as it slid back and forth. I could feel the way his dick pulsed and twitched inside of me, even as the walls of my pussy pressed tightly around him, drawing out his orgasm in heady waves. I could feel the way my whole body seemed to relax back, as though he'd hit a switch and totally reset my system. I could feel the way his heart was hammering in his chest, matching the movements that my own heart was making.

  Above all, I could feel our hands, twined there where they rested against the sheets, could feel the strength of his grip, as though he was telling me that he would never let me go again.

  I smiled and relaxed, truly relaxed, for the first time in weeks.

  But reality came crashing back all too soon, and I couldn't help glancing over at him. “You're not going to stay here in Hawaii though, are you?” I asked sadly. As much as I wanted to believe that he would, I knew that this wasn't some cheesy romance novel or movie. This was real life and in real life-

  Christian groaned and pulled me close against him, heedless of how overheated we both were. “Trust me,” he said into my hair. “I want nothing more than to move here with you.” He paused. “We'll have to see how things go. Maybe in a year or two, I'll want to revisit that idea of moving to California or somewhere. But for now, I want nothing more than to move here with you.”

  “But what about Sunrise Real Estate?” I asked, even though I knew I should just shut up and accept what he was saying at face value. It wasn't that I didn't trust him. I'd been hurt before, and I wanted to protect myself against having that happen again.

  “I'll sell all my stocks,” Christian said, though, shrugging. “Should be able to make a decent amount of money off that. And then I thought that maybe I'd invest in a joint pineapple and massage therapy center.” His voice sounded sly there at the end, and I couldn't help laughing.

  “You've been talking to Mina, haven't you?” I asked.

  He shrugged again. “I wanted to talk to her before I came over to your place,” I admitted. “I wanted to make sure that I wasn't being a massive dick by coming back here to try to make things up to you. I thought that maybe I was just being selfish. I was afraid that you might already have gotten back together with Lino, and if you had, I wasn't going to stand in the way of that. I know that you'll always have complicated feelings for him, and it wouldn't have been right for me to-”

  “I want you to stay,” I repeated, the words coming out in a rush. I turned to face him, urgently needing him to understand this. “Christian, I loved Lino when I was with him, or I thought I did. And if we'd had a child and ended up together, I would have been happy, I think. But I never felt half of what I feel for you when I was with him. My feelings for him were…” I trailed off, blushing, and shook my head. “It doesn't matter. But Christian, I-”

  Christian swallowed the rest of my words with a kiss, which I gladly returned. Then, he pulled back, staring at me for a long moment. “So, is it okay if I move to Hawaii?” he asked, sounding almost nervous, as though he thought that I might say no.

  I smiled gently at him and twisted my fingers in his once more. “I'd be really happy if you did.”

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Christian

  In some ways, I was still getting used to waking up with Gretchen in my arms, even though we'd spent most nights together over the past couple weeks since I'd moved down to Hawaii. But it was a good feeling to wake up with her head pillowed on my chest, her hair fanning out around us. That morning, she had her arm slung low across my hips, nearly touching my morning wood, and I bit my lip, fighting against the urge to touch myself. I had already made her late to work once that week; I knew that I couldn't do it again. No matter how much I might want to.

  I nuzzled her gently and watched as she woke up, blinking sleepily up at me. Then, she looked over at the alarm clock and sighed. “That time already?” she asked muzzily.

  I blinked at her. “Do you have to work today?”

  She frowned and then cocked her head to the side. “No, I don't,” she said slowly, clearly still waking up. She made a face. “Why did you wake me up? I was having a nice dream.”

  I smiled a little at her complaining. “I thought you had to work. Seeing that you don’t… maybe we could have a nice breakfast and then maybe go surfing,” I told her.

  She rolled her eyes. “Ever since you've retired, you've been insufferably active,” she said, even though I could tell she was amused.

  I shrugged. “I like spending time with you when I get the chance,” I told her. “Anyway, we had a lazy movie day the other day when it was raining, didn't we?”

  “That was nice,” Gretchen said, smiling at the memory. “Hey, do you mind if Mina comes surfing with us today? I haven't spent nearly enough time with her since you've been back, and I'm feeling kind of bad about that.”

  “If you want, the two of you can have a girls’ day,” I said, even though it pained me to even think of it. I wasn't trying to smother her or anything like that, but I was running out of things to do with myself when she was at work, and her days off were the main breaks in the monotony. I was still working on what Paul had said, coming up with some hobbies that I liked doing. Surfing was one of those, but I still wasn't confident enough to go out on my own, without Gretchen there.

  “No, I want you there,” Gretchen said, trailing a hand over my chest. “We can talk about the business and stuff. Plus, I just want you and Mina to get to know one another better. You're the two most important people in my life.”

  “But I'm the most important, aren't I?” I asked teasingly.

  “Maybe,” Gretchen said, smirking at me. “But only if you agree to make your blueberry pancakes this morning!”

  I laughed and rolled out of bed. “Deal,” I said. “You want to stay here in bed while I make them, or are you going to come down and keep me company?”

  “I might hop in the shower,” Gretchen said. “And then I'll meet you downstairs? I feel sticky after our time together.” She blushed adorably at the thought of what we'd gotten up to the night before, and I had to laugh.

  “Still so shy,” I said in amusement, coming around the bed to kiss her gently.

  I checked the news as I got the pancakes ready to go. I nearly choked when I read through my emails. “All my stock in Sunrise has been sold,” I informed Gretchen as she came into the kitchen.

  “Oh, wow, really?” she asked, sounding surprised. “Already?”

  “Yeah. I left Paul in charge of it, and he says they've found some investor who wants to come in and take over wh
at I was doing with the PR stuff. Only his background is actually in PR rather than the real estate sector. He'll still do some of the TV shows that I was doing, like that International Dream Homes one that I was supposed to start filming in a month or two, but for the most part, instead of the real estate stuff, he'll just be focused on marketing and press liaisons.”

  “Cool,” Gretchen said. There was something else in her eyes, though. “Do you regret it?” she asked quietly.

  I frowned at her. “Regret what?” I asked. “Giving it all up? The business was doing better without me anyway. I'm sure-”

  “I'm not asking about the business,” Gretchen interrupted. “I know how much you must have put into that business over the years. What I'm asking is, do you regret moving here?” I could see the way she was waiting with baited breath, and even though I knew I was probably going to burn one of the pancakes having this conversation right now, I moved across the kitchen toward her, catching her hands in mine.

  “No,” I said firmly. “I absolutely do not regret moving here. In fact, I feel so lucky to be here and to be here with you. You have no idea how happy you make me; how happy Hawaii makes me.”

  “Don't lie,” Gretchen said, looking down at the floor. “I know that I make you happy and whatever. But I can tell that you're chomping at the bit. You don't know what to do with yourself now that you have all this free time. And-”

  “Gretchen,” I interrupted. She finally looked up at me. “Gretchen, I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be here,” I told her. I laughed a little. “Honestly, this is probably good for me. As Paul said, my main problem is that for the past decade or so, my whole life has been work and going around with random women. I haven't had any hobbies or anything else. Yeah, it's taking me a bit to settle into this, but at the same time, I'm happy to be here with you. Don't even doubt that.”

  “Okay,” Gretchen said. She paused. “Soon you'll have the business stuff to keep you occupied.”