Hold on to Love

by Roberta Capizzi

  “Miss O’Riordan, welcome to Wyoming. I’m Isabel Maclaine.”

  Alyssa took her hand, and immediately compared the rough skin of the woman’s palm to her mother’s soft and smooth one. She was pretty sure Mrs. Maclaine didn’t have a cleaning maid like her mother did.

  “Please, just call me Alyssa,” she said politely; hopefully she’d manage to be just Alyssa for three weeks. No more reminders of her New York life for a while. “It’s good to be here. I’m loving it already.”

  “Please do come in, have a seat,” Mrs. Maclaine offered, leading her toward a living room on the right where upholstered armchairs sat in circle close to a brick fireplace. Alyssa followed her and looked at the room. Unlike all the posh places she had spent her holidays in, Alyssa felt as if she had just come home from a long trip and her family was welcoming her. Only, this wasn’t her family nor it was her home, but it somehow felt like it, and Alyssa found herself wondering why.

  “I’m fine, thanks. I’ve been sitting on planes and in cabs all day, I don’t mind standing for a while.”

  Mrs. Maclaine smiled and nodded, checking out some sheets of paper she was holding in her hands.

  “So, let’s see. You’re staying three weeks, right?” Alyssa nodded. “We’re not really busy this time of the year. With kids back in school, families are all gone and international tourists usually come during the summer. September is a pretty quiet month, but we do have a couple on their honeymoon, so you won’t be alone for the next couple of days.”

  Alyssa didn’t point out that she didn’t mind being alone, that she’d actually picked the remotest place she could find just because she wanted to be alone. She had planned three weeks of nothingness, no talking about her life, her family, or her job. No thinking about her future either. She wanted to enjoy idle life, a good book and outdoor living; hopefully, by the time she went back, she’d have a clear mind about what she wanted to do with herself.

  “I know it’s a weird time for a holiday, but I needed to take a break from a stressful job; I thought a little bit of country life would do the trick,” Alyssa said, hoping this would be enough of an explanation, and she wouldn’t be asked again.

  Mrs. Maclaine nodded. “You’ll be a different person when you go home, I can assure you. Stress isn’t in our dictionary around here.”

  Sean walked out of the kitchen without his hat on and Alyssa took in his facial features as he approached them. His hair was a dark shade of blond, a little darker than his mother’s, just like she’d imagined. It was cropped shorter on the sides and barely an inch longer on the top in a sort of Marine-style. He was handsome. His skin was tanned, in a way only a person who spends the whole year working in the sun could be, and Alyssa almost envied him. She knew lots of women in New York who spent hours in tanning salons, hoping to look as if they’d just been on a holiday in the Caribbean. The stubble on his cheeks added to his rugged looks, and even though he looked young she could see lines creasing his brow, the result of a life in the outdoors and under the sun. He looked nothing like the clean-shaven, neatly-dressed men she was so used to; he was rather intriguing.

  “Sean, would you mind bringing Miss O’Riordan’s luggage to the Pine room?” Mrs. Maclaine asked her son. When she turned back to look at Alyssa, she was smiling. “We have tree-themed rooms, you see. Since we’re not expecting other guests, I’ve given you one of the nicest ones—the other one was requested by the two other guests, the honeymooners, who always want that room when they come. The Pine room has a lovely view of the fields and the woods, and since it faces west, the sun won’t bother you in the morning but it will warm up the room in the afternoon, so you won’t be cold at night. It already tends to be a little chilly in the evening.”

  Alyssa smiled. It sounded lovely, even though she hadn’t seen the room yet. This holiday was starting to become really exciting.

  ***

  They didn’t have time to talk much because a moment later, a girl walked in. She didn’t look like the posh teenagers Alyssa was used to having around, and she liked it; she sort of reminded Alyssa of herself when she was a teenager. She was slim and tall, with a pair of tight jeans and a colorful T-shirt with beaded decoration. Although Alyssa couldn’t make out her age, she looked to be fifteen, maybe sixteen. Her blonde hair fell in curls to her shoulder, and it was pulled back on the sides with two glittery hairclips; her eyes were a warm brown, and she had a friendly smile.

  “Good afternoon,” the girl said with a polite smile Alyssa returned. Something inside her told Alyssa she was going to like this girl. “I’m Tammy, well, Tamara to be precise, but I’m simply Tammy for everyone.”

  Alyssa shook hands with her, and saw Tammy’s eyes grow wide with surprise and excitement when she noticed Alyssa’s bag.

  “Oh my God, that’s a Prada!” Tammy squealed and brought a hand to her mouth without taking her eyes off the bag.

  Sean and his mother turned back with frowns on their faces; Alyssa was probably the only one in the room who knew what Tammy was referring to. Alyssa smiled and lifted her bag so that Tammy could take a closer look at it. She had never really cared much about brands but seeing the look on Tammy's face, she guessed that the younger girl did. A lot, actually.

  “May I?” she asked, jerking her hand forward and then back as if she’d been scalded.

  Alyssa nodded and handed the bag to her while everyone else in the room looked at Tammy as if she had totally lost her mind.

  “This is like . . . a limited edition, isn’t it? I’ve read about it in a magazine, and I thought I’d never see one up close. Aw, it’s so beautiful!”

  The young girl stared at the bag as if it were a piece of art, the Mona Lisa of bags. She stroked it with the utmost care, as if she were scared it would fall apart, and Alyssa smiled in spite of the looks on everyone else’s faces. She was even tempted to tell her she could keep it, if she loved it so much.

  “It was a birthday present from a friend. She works for Prada, so I bet she got a good bargain for it. She probably got away with six hundred dollars.”

  Tammy looked up at her, wide-eyed. Alyssa was so used to being around people who didn’t really have to care about money, that she almost feared she had said something rude and out of place. She had never been a posh person, in spite of her family money, but right now she felt as if she were actually acting like a posh New Yorker, and she didn’t like the feeling at all. Maybe saying the price out loud hadn’t been the smartest idea, but it was done now and she couldn’t take it back.

  “Wow, that’s amazing,” Tammy said, taking another look at the bag and turning it around in her hands to check out every small detail.

  “I’d say it’s outrageous, rather than amazing,” Sean, cut in curtly, standing by his sister, his brows furrowed together. He didn’t seem too pleased about what she had said, and Alyssa suddenly felt out of place. She should’ve left that stupid bag at home, where it wouldn’t have caused so much fuss.

  “Sean, this bag costs something like a thousand dollars. Her friend got an incredible deal!” Tammy said, waving the bag in front of him.

  Her brother stiffened, and took a step toward Alyssa’s suitcase. He picked it up with a swift movement, and Alyssa noticed again how muscular his arms were.

  “A thousand dollars? I can’t believe somebody would waste so much money on a bag. It’s almost insulting, considering it’s not even close to some people’s monthly wages around here.”

  Tammy rolled her eyes. “This isn’t just a bag, Sean. This is a Prada. It’s worth every dime!”

  “Unless it’s made of gold, I don’t see why it should be so expensive. It’s absurd,” he grumbled, walking out of the room in a huff, carrying her luggage and leaving a weird feeling in the pit of Alyssa’s stomach, as if she should feel guilty and ashamed for something.

  That bag was a present, after all, and even though she too felt that it had been slightly expensive, there wasn’t much she could do about it. Why should she throw away s
omething she liked, just because it was too expensive? Okay, the bag was the equivalent of somebody’s wages, but even if she stopped using it, nothing would change, would it? Besides, why should he care if she had an expensive bag? And who was he to criticize her, anyway? If that was the way the holiday had started, Alyssa feared her stay might turn out to be a total disaster; maybe she should turn back and go home straight away.

  “Don’t mind him, he’s just a man. He can’t understand what this means to a girl!” Tammy reassured her, walking back and forth with the bag slung on her shoulder, as if on a make-believe catwalk.

  Alyssa smiled; maybe her stay wouldn’t be that bad after all. Tammy seemed a nice and funny girl, and her mother seemed good and kind. She would only have to stay away from Sean, who so far didn’t seem to like her too much.

  “Tammy,” Mrs. Maclaine said after a moment. “Give the bag back to Miss O’Riordan now, and go back to your room. I’m sure you still have to finish your homework.”

  “Please, just call me Alyssa,” she reminded her. She only wanted to be Alyssa, a girl from the city who was going to spend some time in the country. No more reminders of her life for a while.

  Tammy handed the bag back to Alyssa, thanking her politely, and eyeing it for another minute before her mother reproached her, and she left without arguing further.

  “I’m sorry,” Mrs. Maclaine said, as soon as her daughter departed the room. “She’s got an obsession with fashion, although I don’t really know where she gets it from. I guess growing up with three brothers made her want to show everyone she’s a girl.” She chuckled lightly, and Alyssa smiled; it figured. “Anyway, I’m sure you want to rest for a while now, after the long journey. I’ll show you to your room.”

  Alyssa followed Mrs. Maclaine down the narrow corridor, looking forward to a nice warm shower after the long trip.

  Chapter Six

  Sean left the suitcase in the Pine room, and as he closed the door behind him he wished the woman had chosen somewhere else to stay. Three weeks wouldn’t go by fast enough.

  Most of their guests were down-to-earth people, middle-class families who wanted to experience life in the country and were willing, sometimes even happy, to get their hands and clothes dirty by helping out with the animals or the gardening, just so that they could do something new, something different from their everyday lives.

  Rich people, he knew just too well, preferred top resorts in cool places, like Florida, Mexico or the Caribbean. They would never want their expensive clothes to get stained or ruined, and they surely would never imagine a holiday could mean anything else but lying on a deckchair by a pool with a cocktail in one hand and the latest iPhone in the other.

  When he’d seen her chatting with Aaron, Sean had thought she’d looked like a nice person; she seemed a little out of place, that was plain to see, but so did most of the guests who came to their ranch, especially if they’d never been to Wyoming before; the beauty of the landscape had quite a dazzling effect on tourists. As a bonus, she was young and attractive with her long, auburn hair that fell in waves to the middle of her back, and stunning green eyes; he couldn’t believe his luck when he spotted her and realized she was the guest who’d be staying three weeks. Not that he was planning on hitting on her, anyway; he’d never even flirted with any of the female guests, not even when they’d made it clear they fancied him. It wouldn’t be professional of him to get involved with guests; besides, he wasn’t that type of guy. He wanted a long-lasting relationship, not a one-night stand with a girl who’d consider him a holiday fling.

  His happy bubble had burst when he’d heard the cost of the bag that had caught Tammy’s attention, and had caused so much fuss; within a second, he had felt as if he’d stepped back in time and all the memories had come back in the blink of an eye.

  Bethany used to love showing off her new expensive bags, too, and that was one of the very few things he had never really liked about her; but she had always been able to make him forget all her flaws just by looking at him with her Bambi eyes and her smile. If only he had known better; if only he had been able to see beyond those Bambi eyes and that perfect smile, he would have saved himself an awful lot of trouble.

  He knew it was stupid to think that the new guest—what was her name? Alyssa, was it?—was like Bethany just because she owned a thousand-buck bag, but he couldn’t help the comparison, and that had made him immediately dislike her.

  He had been working in the family business for years, so he knew how important it was to treat every single guest in the best possible way. If they enjoyed their vacation they would hopefully come back again, or recommend their ranch to friends and families. There had been only a few guests he hadn’t been able to get on well with, but he had always been very professional and, hard as it had been, he had always been courteous with them, so they had never really noticed the difference.

  But this girl . . . well, with this girl it would be tougher. She had immediately reminded him of Bethany, so sophisticated and beautiful, so well-mannered, and no doubt very smart. Although they looked totally different—Bethany was a brunette with dark eyes and long, straight hair—he could easily tell that they belonged to the same world, which was light-years away from his.

  When he’d heard the cost of that bag, well, there had been no further doubt that they were alike, and a sting of annoyance had pierced his stomach. He hadn’t been able to contain himself, to disguise his feelings like he knew he should have.

  He didn’t know what was going to happen. He didn’t know if he would be able to keep cool and professional. That girl had torn an old wound open, a wound that had only recently started to heal, and he was sure she was going to pour salt into it just by being herself—her rich posh self.

  He shook his head and walked back out to the barn where he’d left his father when he’d heard Aaron’s car approach; focusing on his work would probably help him get rid of the queasiness the new guest had caused him.

  His father turned back toward him when Sean entered the barn. The older man looked at him with the fork in mid-air as he was stacking some hay for the following day.

  “So, how’s the new guest? Does she look like a fugitive?” he asked with a smile, and for a moment Sean’s annoyance left his mind and body. Only for a moment, though.

  He shrugged. “She’s okay, I guess. I don’t think she’s running from anything; she looks too rich and travels with too much luggage to be on the run.”

  His father chuckled. “Then perhaps she just needs a little rest. Even rich people do, every now and then.”

  “Yeah, between a cocktail party and a day at a spa, their lives must get extremely stressful,” Sean said, picking up the other fork and helping his father to keep his mind busy.

  “Hmm . . . I take it you don’t like her?” his father asked, leaning against the fork and staring at him. Sean pretended not to notice the inquisitive look in his eyes, and speared a big chunk of hay with much more force than it was needed. “Does she look like Bethany?”

  Sean’s head whipped back to him, and his mouth dropped open. Was he really such an open book?

  His father shrugged. “The way you’re acting, and talking about her like a posh person, I thought she reminded you of her. I mean, how long have you been around this girl? All of ten minutes? If you dislike her after such a short time it can only mean she struck a chord, a bad one.”

  Sean pondered his father’s words; how was he supposed to tell him how he felt? Hell, she was more attractive than any girl he’d met in years, even more attractive than Bethany, but the fact that she was so rich had been a real buzz-killer, and he didn’t want to admit it to anyone, especially not to his father.

  “It’s just . . . She was showing off a bag that’s worth a thousand dollars, and Tammy got all excited at the sight of it. She’s already her best friend, I can tell. I don’t want her to have a bad influence on Tammy; you know what she’s like.”

  Yes, this was the best excuse he could come up
with. It should be enough to convince his father that there were no other reasons behind his dislike of her.

  “A thousand dollars? Wow, that must be quite a bag, huh? Is it made of gold or something?”

  Sean shook his head, and smiled. If Tammy were here she’d roll her eyes. “That’s what I said; but apparently us men don’t understand the importance of a Prada bag, or whatever it’s called.”

  His father smiled, and went back to his task. After a minute of silence, he stopped again and turned to look at Sean. “You know that even if you don’t like her you should be kind to her, don’t you, Son? We don’t want her to feel unwelcome.”

  Sean nodded. As if he hadn’t thought about it already. “Don’t worry, Dad. I’ll be on my best behavior. Scout’s honor.”

  His father laughed. “You were never a scout, Sean. But I’ll take you up on it anyway. It’s only three weeks; it can’t be that bad.”

  Oh yeah, it could. That bad and even worse—but he obviously wasn’t going to admit it to his father.

  “Hey guys, you finished? Mom said dinner will be ready in half an hour.” Tammy stormed into the barn in her usual style, and Sean rolled his eyes. She was fifteen but still acted like a child most of the time—which didn’t bother him that much, to be honest. He didn’t want her to start acting like a real teenager, hanging out with guys and doing God knows what else with them. He always got the creeps just at the thought of it.

  “Tell Mom we’re almost done. We’re a little late, but we’re catching up now.”

  Tammy nodded. “Don’t you think Miss O’Riordan is amazing? I think she’s by far the coolest guest we’ve had in years.”

  There, just like he’d thought. Tammy was crazy about her already; this was a bad sign. Sean shrugged, and went back taking his resentment out on the innocent stack of hay.