Finding Submission (Service & Submission Book 1)

by Michaels, Megan

  Finally, he let go of her tail. “Kitty, give me your dish please.”

  Avery handed it to him and he heated it back up in the microwave. If she had to eat late and eat on the floor, the food should at least be warm.

  “Be a good kitty and eat it all. No hands, just lean forward and eat.”

  Preston slid the dish in front on her, raising an eyebrow when she glared back at him. She quickly bent to her task.

  When she was almost done, Preston pulled her dish away, putting it on the table and wiping her face clean. “C’mere, sweetie. Sit on your heels and I’ll feed you the chicken on this plate.”

  Preston loved watching her open her mouth as he slipped the food in. There was nothing hotter than feeding a woman by hand. But with the addition of a collar and a tail, it was even better.

  “You know I can feed myself with a fork and use a big girl plate, right?” Avery scowled at him.

  “Aaaavery. I don’t think your bottom will appreciate your mouth getting it in trouble. Are you sure you want to do this?”

  “N-no, Sir. I’ll eat.”

  “Good decision.” Preston continued to feed her until the plate was empty.

  Then he took her back on her rug to rest while he washed the dishes.

  Chapter 11

  Preston and Avery had cuddled and watched movies together in the bed that night. He’d stroked and pet her, calling her his “good kitty.”

  Avery still wasn’t sure about the kitty stuff, but if pressed and asked if she liked it — and if she would do it again — she’s have said yes. No doubt her bottom was still marked and sore to the touch, but she had learned that quiet submission and obedience made being a kitten more than tolerable. It was actually quite nice! She liked being touched — and Preston was very attentive. He stroked her arms, shoulders and hair constantly. Somehow that touch met some deep desire in her to be held and loved. She liked being the center of his attention – it made her feel charming, loveable. He’d even called her adorable more than once. She hadn’t felt adorable since she was a child — and worthy of being adored. How many women had the chance to say they spent a weekend being catered to and adored? Not many.

  And if she broke the rules, well, she was still the center of attention — it just wasn’t pleasant attention. She was punished with a paddle, cane, or his hand. Preston was someone who believed in rules and boundaries — and playing kitty wasn’t any different. Kittens were only allowed on the bed if he said so. Kittens were allowed to eat when he said, and they had to eat off the floor or by hand. Kittens had to even ask permission to go to the bathroom — every trip was subject to Preston’s pre-approval, and she never went until he said it was okay.

  She’d tried sneaking into the bathroom without permission once, and found herself paddled with a cherry hairbrush as soon as she finished voiding. He hadn’t even waited for her to exit the bathroom, for Christ’s sake! He’d just scooped her up, tucking her under his arm so tightly she couldn’t move, and then proceeded to paddle her bottom with a severity and exactness that had her dancing in place in front of the toilet.

  When he was finished with her punishment he’d plopped her abused bottom back down onto the cold porcelain and said, “You’ll ask permission the next time, won’t you?”

  When she’d silently nodded, hot tears in her eyes, he’d nodded back and stomped out of the room.

  Despite those punishments, despite his strictness, kitten play definitely put her in the spotlight — and when she was, she felt totally and completely cared for, even loved.

  The movie’s soundtrack music blared, the ending credits scrolling up the screen, bringing her back to the present. It was time for bed.

  Avery was a little concerned about how all of it was going to work. Yes, she was fascinated with sleeping in her crate under the bed, but at the same time she worried that it would be lonely and cold. She had gotten used to sleeping with Preston who was a cuddler. He always had a leg thrown over her, one of her breasts in his hand at all times, as they slept. She loved feeling the warmth of his body, the weight of his cock ensconced in the crevice of her bottom. It was going to be weird sleeping alone. She hoped she wouldn’t be cold, and wondered not for the first time if it was going to be dark in there. Avery knew she was an adult and shouldn’t be afraid of the dark, but still she always found it hard to sleep without some light — be it from her cable box, clock or a night light.

  Preston snapped the leash to her collar. “Come Kitty, time for bed.” Preston tugged on her leash and she crawled off the couch, following behind him to the bed. He patted the mattress. “Come sit up here so we can talk about this first.”

  Relief washed over her. She needed to talk about this first too. Knowing his expectations required of her might help calm her nerves.

  “Tell me what you’re thinking, Avery. What’re you afraid of or concerned about as far as tonight goes?”

  Avery averted her eyes — she hated to admit weakness, and it was difficult to discuss her concerns or fears without admitting weakness. She bit her lip, trying to choose her words carefully so she didn’t sound like some sissy girl.

  “Avery, there is nothing you can say that’s going to upset me. I’m asking you to share your concerns. You’re a thinker, I know you’re wondering about things, and worrying about things. Please tell me, so I can calm you and assure you that I only want you to be comfortable and happy.”

  “Well, I’m worried that I’ll be cold. I’ve gotten used to cuddling with you, and you’re always so warm. I’m also a little—” she looked up at him through her lashes “—I’m a little afraid of the dark.”

  Preston raised an eyebrow, looking at her with a crooked smile. “It’s okay if you are, you know. You aren’t alone with that — lots of people are uncomfortable with the dark. That’s what night lights are for. What else has you worried?”

  “I’m worried about not being able to get out. What if you die or something in the night? Or what if there’s a fire and I’m stuck in there after you’re overcome with smoke and die?” Avery had her hand at her throat, her face paling.

  “My God, Avery, it’s a wonder you sleep at all. Sweetie, do you think like this all the time?”

  “Well, no. Not really. But you’re not put in a cage every day and I don’t want to be stuck and die like that. I’m not sure I can do it if there isn’t an escape hatch or ejection seat. I mean what if—“

  “An ejection seat?” His smile was warm, affectionate. “Kitten, please. These are real fears, and I have taken that into account. First, I have a separate heating system for the crate and the bed is heated. It’s like a heating blanket — you can adjust it to the temperature that you like best. There are mini lights in the top of the crate, so it’s illuminated. There’s even a dimmer switch in there so you can make it to the brightness you need to sleep comfortably.”

  He put his hand under her chin and kissed her nose. “Feel better?”

  “Yes, but—“

  “Uh-uh, I’m not done. There’s also is a button in the back of the crate that can pop the bars open anytime you are in a panic or something is seriously wrong.”

  Avery closed her eyes, and exhaled a long slow breath. “Oh, thank God. I… needed to hear those things.”

  “Now, I want to say. If there isn’t a fire or you aren’t in a complete panic attack, crying, or having a nightmare, you are not supposed to open that door. I — and I alone — am the only person who’s supposed to open that door. That button is only for emergencies. If you open that door and it isn’t an emergency, it’s the same as lying in my book — and you’ll be punished like it’s lying. What’s the punishment for lying, girlie?”

  “It’s the belt, Sir.”

  “Yes, that’s correct. Keep it in mind. But I want you to know you’re safe, and if anything spooks you — or you have a panic attack or a nightmare — you hit that button and come to see me immediately. Okay, Kitten?”

  “Yes, Sir. Sir?”

  Preston ti
lted his head, looking at her curiously. “Yes, Avery? Spill it.”

  “Do I have to sleep with my tail in? I’m not sure I want to.”

  Preston paused, rubbing his chin, the duration of his silence making Avery a little nervous. It wasn’t that he was mean spirited, but she knew he delighted in keeping her a little off balance, and always seemed to be looking for an ulterior motive for any questions or requests she had. “First, whether you want to or not isn’t an issue for me. This is about what I want, and whether you will choose to obey or defy. I didn’t put a large plug in, and it isn’t going to be uncomfortable to sleep in. I’m thinking I’ll have you sleep with it in, and in the morning we’ll take it out. Keeping it in will keep you aroused all night, and you’ll be nice and ready for me in the morning. I like having my kitty in heat — she’s more responsive when she’s been aroused for a while.”

  “But—“

  “Uh-uh. Are you sure you really want to defy me on this? You’ve been doing pretty well with obeying this evening. You can go to bed with your tail in, or you can take twenty with the cane — and then go to bed with your tail in. Your choice, bad girl.” Preston crossed over his chest, looking down at her. “And again, this isn’t about what you want. This weekend is about me — your owner — and what I want. You’re the submissive — my pet — and you’re to submit, taking enjoyment in knowing that you’re pleasing me. If you become defiant, mouthy, or disobedient, you’ll find out that the punishment is as painful as the previous ones you’ve received today.”

  Avery really didn’t want to be punished. She wanted to get the fullness of kitty play, and even though she didn’t understand all of it, she was enjoying herself. She needed to trust him, to know that he knew best when it came to this. If he felt she would be more aroused this way, she would wait until morning and enjoy their time then. She looked over at the kitty bed ensconced under his own.

  “Avery, it really isn’t that bad. I went to a lot of work to make sure that bed would be comfortable for my future kitty. It’s warm, comfortable, well-lit, and safe. If this is beyond your limits, let me know now, because I’m not going to tolerate any misbehavior or defiance in this regard.”

  “No, it’s not a hard limit.”

  Preston pulled her in for a kiss. “My favorite kitten. Good girl. Is my kitty ready for her bed? I turned on the heat, your bed is warming, and the lights are on — it’s all ready for you. On the floor, let’s go.”

  Avery got down on all fours, crawling to her bed. Preston opened the door and tugged on her leash, prompting her to crawl in. But Avery didn’t like him pulling on her collar, and didn’t want to be rushed into it. It felt too much like he was anxious to get rid of her. She wanted to go in on her own, and look around slowly with the door open. She wanted to do it on her terms, not his. He was so demanding. She pulled back and sat on the floor cross-legged, her arms crossed over her chest.

  “Avery Rose, what’re you doing?” When she didn’t answer he continued. “Well, we discussed this. The choice was obedience or punishment. I see you’ve chosen punishment, or am I wrong? Do you want to go to bed, or get your bottom caned?”

  Avery scowled at him, and she refused to answer.

  “Remember that you asked for this, kitty.”

  Avery watched his broad shoulders stiffen and straighten with determination, then he turned on his heel and walked away. Preston loved rules and boundaries, and if anyone crossed over those boundaries there were consequences. Anyone. But if you were his, like Avery was, the consequences resulted in a very sore, very red, bare bottom. She knew this. Knew it when she sat down and gave him an angry pout. But it was just too difficult to crawl into the bed. Just like it was too difficult to lie over his lap. She needed him to force her, needed him to take the choice away from her. If she pushed his buttons, he would take over — that choice at least, was still hers ultimately — but once the punishment began, she always concluded it was easier to obey. It was certainly a lot less painful.

  One by one, Preston pulled several canes out of the cupboard. He swung each of them through the air in turn. When each cane sliced the air, the sound made her flinch. He tested one against his leg, then put it back, pulling out a new one. Her bottom tingled and she questioned once again why she fought him. He methodically tested them until he found the right one. Then he nodded, shutting the doors and striding her way. His lips were thinned, his eyes dark, and the closer he came, the faster the butterflies fluttered in her belly.

  “Stand up, Avery.”

  Avery’s legs trembled as she obeyed. Unable to make eye contact, she stared at his bare feet. He had nice feet, long thin toes. Masculine, yet attractive.

  “Look at me, Avery.” She locked her gaze with his. She didn’t see mercy in those cobalt blue eyes, but there wasn’t anger either. Just a determined intensity.

  “I want you to bend over the end of the bed, standing at the entrance to your kitty bed. I’m thinking when this is caning is done, you’ll be happy to lie on your kitty pillow.”

  Avery walked over to the bed, bending over it as instructed. The mattress was high, forcing her up on tip toes. Preston walked up behind her, his hand rubbing over her bottom. He stopped briefly to play with her tail, stroking and petting it. His caressing hand moved from the tail to her thighs and back again.

  “Such a pretty bottom and tail — now I have to give my kitty stripes. I didn’t want to stripe you this weekend, girlie. Too bad you can’t obey without punishment — but I won’t let you get away with acting bratty. I’ll always care about your behavior, and you will learn. How long it takes for you to learn, is up to you.”

  His hands stroked further up her thighs, his finger delving into her sex. “You’re dripping, Avery.” He circled her clit with feathery strokes, dipping his fingers into her sex, making her gasp. “We have no time for that right now either. Too bad. My naughty kitty needs to be punished.” He eased his hands up her body until they cupped her breasts, her wetness on his finger dampening her nipples, her scent filling her nostrils.

  “Bad Kitty, I want you to reach behind you and grab your tail — you’ll hold it out of my way for your spanking. Pull on it tightly. I want there to be a steady uncomfortable tug on your bottom hole during your punishment. Do not let go of this tail during your punishment, or there will be extras. Understood?”

  “Yes, Sir. Sir?”

  “Yes?”

  “I’m really, really sorry. I just didn’t know how… ” Avery dropped her head onto the bedspread. She didn’t even know how to explain the jumble of feelings going on inside her. She wanted to obey. But didn’t want to give in to the lure of kitty play — even as she enjoyed it. Her pussy was dripping and clenching, and she liked her pretty white tail. The one she had in her hand right now. She even enjoyed being fed by Preston.

  But she felt like she had to resist this. Wasn’t this depraved somehow? Well, maybe not. Preston was an attorney — a well-respected attorney – and he was into it People role-played all kinds of things.

  How could she tell him how she struggled with it inside, that her misbehavior was directly related to this conflict?

  “I know, sweetie. We’ll deal with this, and I guarantee we’ll get you sorted out.”

  Preston lightly tapped her bottom, the touch of the hard, cold cane making her bottom cheeks tremble. Then she heard the sound of the cane slicing the air, and a line of fire exploded on her backside. In reaction to the pain, Avery clenched her bottom and tried to rise, shouting in pain, but Preston’s heavy hand at the middle of her back kept her in place.

  “No rising, Avery. Stay in place. You have five more lashes of the cane then we’ll be done. When your owner tells you to do something, as a good kitty you will do what?”

  “I’ll do it! I promise. Can we be done?”

  “No, you have five more. “

  Avery knew that once Preston decided she needed a punishment, nothing she said nor any amount of pleading would change his mind. He was resolute and d
etermined — and breaking the rules was never tolerated.

  Three lashes landed, one after the other, and by the end of the third one she was screeching. If it hadn’t been for his hand on her back she would’ve rolled over, holding her abused bottom. How could it hurt so much? The pain increased with every second. She quietly cried into the bedspread. She hated crying — ever since she was a little girl, she’d thought crying was a sign of weakness. But Preston seemed to feel her healing and restoration couldn’t begin without that crying, that display of emotion. He had said many times after disciplining her, that he wouldn’t think of stopping a punishment until there were tears — that submission and dominance were put into their perfect order once tears of remorse where shed.

  “You’ve got some pretty impressive tram-lines rising on your bottom, girlie. You’re going to find it difficult to sit tomorrow, I’m thinking. You’ll happily sleep on your tummy with your tail in tonight, won’t you? Such a naughty Kitty.” Preston traced his finger along one of the tram lines, the hurt making her wag her hips to avoid his touch. Not that it stopped him — he loved feeling the swollen tracks his cane left in her flesh. He would still be doing it even days after a caning.

  “And I know you thought I missed it, but you let go of your tail — so you’ll be getting three strokes instead of two. These are going to be on the underside of your bottom, on your sit spots — and they’ll be the hardest. You’ll remember your defiance and learn from it. Am I right?”

  “Y-yes, Sir.”

  “Let’s continue.” He lightly tapped the area, making her jump in anticipation.

  The sound of a cane hitting the skin at lightning speed was something she’d learned to dread. She hated that sound and even as it was occurring, she sucked in a breath, holding it until the pain became too much, and she exhaled with a low, guttural groan. His hand left her back, and she immediately rolled over holding her abused flesh. The feel of the lines under the palms of her hands felt unsettlingly familiar, and yet at the same time that familiarity brought a sort of comfort.