The Lies of Pride

by Lily Zante

  She stares at me as if I’ve lost it. Maybe I have. All I ever wanted was a role like this, in a film like this. And now I have it. The shooting is over, and the best part begins; a round of interviews and publicity drives. Sucking up to the big guns, hoping to get noticed enough to be considered for an award. Elevate my career to the highest level.

  But I’m not sure I want that so badly anymore. My life is pretty good. I have everything I could ever want. I don’t need more money, or more fame. I don’t need even more intrusion into my life.

  I want Nina, and the chance to slow down, live life and appreciate each moment. I can’t let her down. She’s asked me to be there with her at Elias’s match. Unfortunately, Rudy’s gone and set up a brunch meeting with the studio heads. I’ll go to that, and I’ll still be able to get my flight and make it to Madison Square Garden.

  I’ll wear my baseball cap and lie low.

  “This is your career you’re risking, Callum,” Dottie says, doing her best to make me see sense. “Do you really want to do that?”

  Every time I’ve started a new relationship, things have always gone well for me. They’ve been easy. People think I’ve led a charmed life. Or course they have no idea what it is to lose your best friend and younger brother in the prime of his life. Most people only see what you show them, and they selectively always choose to see the good stuff. My friends have even said that everything is super easy for me. I get the women, I get the roles, I have the wealth. But I would give all of this up in a heartbeat if I could get him back. That’s impossible, even I know that, so I try to make it the best life I have. It looks easy, the women, the wealth, the houses and cars. But this hasn’t been easy—with Nina. Ever since we met, things have been decidedly different. She is the different I need and want.

  “She’s asked me to be there. She needs me. I can’t let her down.”

  Dottie looks at me as if she doesn’t understand. “I’ll go and watch the fight, if it’s support she needs. We get on, me and Nina.”

  “Nice try, but no.” I’ve heard Dottie on the phone to her boyfriend who is desperate for a ticket. I think they might even have asked Nina to get one but Nina hasn’t said anything about it..

  “Rudy will go apeshit if he finds out where you are,” Dottie reminds me.

  “Who’s going to tell him?” I heard Rudy loud and clear. Heard the veiled threats. I’m aware of what studio heads do. The control that these invisible, rich men have over Hollywood and all the wanna-be’s. We’ve all played along, and it has benefited me as much as it has them. But this time, on this one occasion, I won’t bend to their bidding.

  “This is the film you want to get the Oscar nomination for,” Dottie reminds me. “Can you afford to mess it up?”

  “Who says I’m going to mess anything up? Don’t look so worried. I’m playing along. I’ll go to this meeting with Rudy and the bigwigs now, and later I’ll fly out. I’ll be back before you realize.”

  Nina has never asked me for anything, and now that she has, I won’t let her down. We’re not leaving together. She’s going with Harper and I’ll meet her in the arena. I’ll go in disguise, but I’ll sit next to her. Nobody will know. We’ll spend the night together and I’ll come back before Rudy finds out.

  I’m not worried.

  This will work out.

  Things always do.

  Chapter Fifty-One

  NINA

  * * *

  There’s not long to go before the fight now, another hour or so. Like last time, there is a packed undercard, boxing matches between two lesser known boxers before the main fight. I can’t watch them, even though it would help mentally prepare me for Elias’s fight. I am so not cut out for this stuff. I’m only here because I want to support my brother but I’m not being allowed. I want to go into his locker room to see Elias, but Harper warns me against it. Lou, his manager, and Jake and Santos, also tell me to keep away. Jake warns me that he’s never seen Elias like this before.

  I’m still jittery and nervous, but I tell myself that this is good. If he’s angry, that’s exactly how he needs to be.

  Unlike last time, me and Harper aren’t sharing a room together. Callum and I agreed to fly out separately and return to Chicago separately. He said he’s coming in disguise, and if its anything like the stunt he pulled the last time, he could be walking towards me in a sea of faces and I wouldn’t recognize him. I also managed to get him a pass to Elias’s locker room after the fight.

  I feel silly sitting here by myself. I feel left out. Everyone else is in there with Elias. I start to get paranoid and wonder if he is angry with me? Discovering his abuse broke my heart in a thousand places. I wanted to hold and hug him even though I fell apart at the time. I wanted to make sure that he was okay. I assumed he would have the same reaction, but Harper tells me that men handle things differently.

  In a way I’m relieved that I didn’t tell Callum about my past. Having him shun me would have been too much to bear. Talking of Callum, where is he? I need him here to support me. I look around in desperation for him, but he is nowhere to be seen. I scrutinize the faces of strangers in the misguided hope that one of them will be him in disguise. His plane would have landed hours ago. I’ve called a few times ever since I got here but it only goes through to his voicemail.

  I feel left out. Alone and abandoned, sitting here by myself. Even Jake and Santos are in there with Elias. Harper will take her seat next to me only when Elias goes into the ring.

  My stomach is knotty as I sit here in the raucous rambling noise of a braying crowd watching fights I have no interest in. Doubts, like vultures, begin to circle around my head, squawking before they swoop in and consume me.

  There are empty seats on either side of me. Everyone I know and care about is in the locker room.

  A vibration in my jacket pocket alerts me. I fish out my phone and see that Callum’s calling. I look around in anticipation, trying to guess which direction he’ll be coming from and what disguise he might be wearing this time.

  “Hey.”

  “Where are you?” I ask, still looking around. The seats are filling up, and I wouldn’t be able to single him out, unless he came carrying a huge banner.

  “I’m still here. In Chicago. I’m sorry I couldn’t—” His voice is barely audible, and I’m not sure I heard him right.

  “Where are you?”

  “Still in Chicago. I got held up in a meeting. I couldn’t get away.”

  “You had a meeting?” On a Saturday? My heart sinks, dragging every ounce of hope with it. I can’t hear him clearly, and I only catch words, something about Rudy, and a meeting, and the studio heads.

  I thought he didn’t care about those people? So, what changed?

  “I’m sorry Nina. Rudy messed me around—”

  A roar goes out around the auditorium and I crane my neck, looking towards the area where the boxers start their ring walk. “What?” I can’t hear a word he’s saying. Music starts up, and an announcement is being made. I look up, and the lights dim. Then lights begin to flash, and loud music blasts out. Garrison seems to have upped the razzmatazz for which he is known. Callum says something. “I can’t hear you,” I shout back.

  There’s nothing to do but hang up.

  I hear booing, but it’s quickly replaced by cheers from the audience as Garrison hops into the ring and dances around, mock boxing style. He is cocky, and playing to the audience. Up there alone in the ring, he struts around as if he owns it.

  I’m eager to see Elias come in. I want to see his ring walk. Harper has been telling me all about it. He had nothing last time, only a few of the guys walking up alongside him. He didn’t even have music, or a light show, or a nickname. Come to think of it, I don’t think he has a nickname even now, but he has music and light effects now. This should be epic.

  The sound of the crowd lowers, then turns into a quiet buzz. And then the MC announces Elias’s entrance, and everyone in the arena goes crazy. The air turns electric. I c
rane my neck, my ears straining for the music. And the lights. Where is the lightshow? Where is the music? Where is Elias?

  He doesn’t appear, but I know he’s making the challenger wait, he’s just building up the suspense.

  But when moments pass, and there is no sign of Elias, I’m suddenly fearful. Then, just when everyone starts wondering what the heck is going on, Elias emerges from the tunnel.

  I sit up taller, slip to the edge of my seat.

  I can see Elias walking in, flanked by his entourage. He’s wearing a white satin robe and his hood is up.

  But still there is no music. There are no lights. Just one spotlight eerily showcasing Elias’s walk to the ring.

  What’s going on?

  My heart bangs against my ribcage.

  I need to see his face. I need to gauge his mood. I haven’t seen him since that day, and I won’t rest until I do. His hood is up. His chin is high, but the rest of his face is shadowed.

  And then it starts. I hear it behind me first, then the sound gets louder and louder, like angry waves crashing against rocks. The roar reaches a crescendo just as Elias jumps up and into the ring.

  I don’t know what happened to his entrance plans, but the crowd don’t seem to know any different. Their support for him echoes in the jubilant cheers which shotgun all around me.

  I push it away, that Callum isn’t here. He must have good reason, I tell myself. He’s not my priority right now. Elias is. My eyes are fixed on the ring, on Elias.

  The crowd goes crazy when Elias’s name is announced again, and the ensuing roar of admiration swells my heart. Harper takes a seat next to me. She looks happy. I have a good feeling about this. I smile at her. It must be tough for Harper to see the man she loves stepping into the ring, putting himself in harm’s way. This is brutality, not entertainment. It’s hard for me to watch, as Elias’s sister, but it must be so much harder for Harper.

  “Where’s Callum?” She shouts in my ear.

  “He couldn’t make it.”

  Harper squeezes my hand.

  She hates this as much as I do.

  If Callum had been here, I would have squeezed his hand harder. Despite all his reassurances to the contrary, it seems that his career is more important to him.

  It’s not a big deal.

  At least that’s what I tell myself.

  Callum’s part is over. He’ll be gone soon.

  This is what matters, Elias, and this fight, and right now.

  After he wins, we can go home.

  And that’s what I focus on.

  I reach over and put my hand on Harper’s. She squeezes it, and I squeeze it right back. We need each other, and as the fight begins we brace ourselves.

  Elias starts off well, he looks fierce, and toned, and is lightning fast on his feet. In no time at all, Garrison walks straight into a jab. He looks as dazed as I feel watching that lightning fast move from Elias. The two of them move around, Garrison is slow, not as quick and sure footed as Elias, and they move around the ring warily, sounding one another out.

  Before long the second round starts with Garrison lunging forward and throwing a punch to Elias’s side. But Elias hits back, firing a jab and then landing a hook which catches Garrison unawares.

  Garrison goes down.

  In the second round! I sit up, struggling to contain my glee.

  This looks easy.

  The referee starts to count, but Garrison signals that he’s okay, and gets up. As soon as he does, Elias lashes out slamming his fist into Garrison’s jaw.

  I breathe out, feeling happier.

  This is brutal. It’s not a ‘sport’ but Elias is winning. He’s okay.

  Tonight will be easy.

  We’ll be out of here in no time.

  Chapter Fifty-Two

  CALLUM

  * * *

  Screw Rudy.

  He pulled a dirty one on me. It’s not easy to walk out of a meeting with the studio head. The so-called ‘brunch’ meeting went on for hours. I’m pretty sure I didn’t even need to be there for most of it. And then some wise ass suggested drinks. I have balls, but the studio head isn’t the type of guy you say you’ve got other plans to. I went, because I was sure I’d get out of it and have time to get to the airport and catch my flight.

  I had it all worked out. A simple yet effective disguise. A flight and then a car straight to The Garden.

  Except that the ‘drinks’ went on for way longer than I expected, and Alyssa turned up. I smelled a rat. I’d been set up by Rudy. The bastard. This was his plan, the damage limitation exercise. Dinner followed later at a trendy restaurant even though by now no one was really hungry because all we’d been doing was hanging out and eating and drinking. Obviously the press had been tipped off to take shots of me and Alyssa leaving, holding hands as if we can’t bear to be apart.

  There will be plenty of gossip column inches and photos of this sham romance. I was too pissed off to even look at Alyssa, much less take part in the conversation. I was definitely in no mood to eat. I wanted dinner to be over and done with so that I could get back to my apartment and call Nina and tell her of the fuck-up I’ve been tricked into.

  It was too late to get my flight. I couldn’t even get the next one out. This is when having a private jet might have come in handy. I couldn’t make it.

  I called Nina as soon as I could to let her know, and to apologize, but I couldn’t hear her properly, and I don’t think she could hear me. I heard the roar of the crowd in the background.

  She hung up on me. I’ll have to catch up with her tomorrow, but I’m watching the fight sitting here in my hotel room alone and I can’t believe what I’m seeing.

  What the heck is up with Elias? I feel lousy anyway, and I’m drinking vodka because I’m in the mood for getting drunk, but I sober up fast when I see Elias taking the kind of punches he shouldn’t be. He started to fall apart almost as soon as the fourth round started.

  I sit up, and then I sit forward, then I put down my glass, my eyes riveted to the screen as I watch, shellshocked.

  Elias is taking a beating.

  What happened? It started off so well.

  Garrison went down in the second and it all looked so promising, even when he managed to get up again.

  Elias cut Garrison in the third round, and with blood trickling from Garrison’s left eye, the fight looked to be going the right way. Garrison getting beat, Elias showing the winning hand.

  And then it all changed.

  They continued fighting for another few rounds but it was hard to tell who was ahead.

  Elias?

  I don’t know what happened. He looked so strong in the first two rounds. In the third round they seemed to be figuring one another out.

  Now we’re into the fourth round and I’m still waiting for a glimpse of the Elias magic that was there on the first fight.

  Something is off.

  Garrison is fast, he looks hungry. He looks like he wants to reclaim his titles and finish off Elias in the process.

  Elias fights back, surging forward and landing a punch square on Garrison’s jaw, but Garrison seems to have walked right through it. He lands a punch on Elias’s jaw.

  Elias goes down.

  I sit forward.

  Get up! Get up!

  Elias is down and Garrison is battering him.

  Hit back!

  HIT BACK!

  Elias manages to get up, but he’s shaky. I sense a shift in the fight.

  This isn’t the Elias I know.

  I sit on the edge of my seat, willing him to speed up, strengthen up, show us some of that Cardoza magic.

  Then Garrison connects with a right that torpedoes Elias, knocking him down, and almost putting him through the ropes. Miraculously, he manages to upright himself and is saved by the bell.

  What the hell is going on?

  What happened?

  Where is Cardoza? Because it doesn’t look to me like he’s in the fight.

  My cell
phone rings, and I grab it, my hopes sinking when I see that it’s not Nina. It’s a friend who’s watching the fight. I was supposed to go and see it with a bunch of crew members. One of them is having a party and they’re all watching it together. I was supposed to go, and I would have had Nina not asked me to go to the fight with her.

  “Are you seeing this?” my friend says.

  “I’m seeing it.”

  “What the fuck?”

  “I know.” I hang up. I feel bad for the Elias. He’s not just some legend taking a beating in the ring, he’s a guy I’ve come to know as a friend. This feels so much more personal. If I feel like shit watching Elias get beat this badly, I hate to think how Nina must feel. The only person I wanted to watch this with, the only person who needed me, I let down.

  The fifth round starts and Garrison comes right at Elias from the opening bell. But this time, Elias fights back. A couple of his punches don’t hit, it’s like he’s lost his aim. Seems to be Garrison who’s doing all the chasing, and Elias is fighting a slow retreat. I shake my head watching Elias getting beat so bad. He gives back. I see he’s trying to get back into the game, but this isn’t the guy who the world watched take Garrison down so easily.

  I sit on the edge of my seat, feeling utterly deflated.

  Come on, Elias. I try to will him with every fiber of my being.

  The sixth round starts and Elias is met with a hail of punches early on. He’s being backed into a corner, and then he goes down again. He makes it to his feet but Garrison throws a barrage of hefty blows and Elias lies on the floor, doing nothing. Defenseless. Almost as if he’s given up.

  The referee stops the fight, and I bolt to my feet, hands on my face, in shock.

  What?

  The camera is on Elias sitting in the corner with blood trickling down his nose. I wince at the sight of so much blood pouring down Elias’s face. He’s been cut badly above the eye. He looks dazed, as if he literally doesn’t know what hit him.