Fight to Live

by Dave Bowman

But his greatest fear was that there would be no survivors. What if he had to spend the rest of his life alone? And what if he ended up at that lodge in New Mexico without another soul anywhere around? He had already had an encounter with a mountain lion in his own hometown. In the mountains, there would be bears, wolves, and who knew what else.

  He wondered what his father would say to him now, as he worried about wild animals and hid in fear behind locked doors. His dad had never called him a coward, but Matt feared that was what he thought of him. He had tried to be more like his father, but Dad always seemed so fearless. Matt didn’t know how he did it.

  He had just turned thirteen, but he was still acting like a little baby.

  It was time to grow up. Matt had to let go of his immature fears. There was no one to take care of him. Just himself.

  He shook his hands out, as if that could release his worry. He had to keep moving, keep doing stuff. That way, he couldn’t be paralyzed by terror.

  It had taken him nearly an entire day to pack up. He knew he might never return to his home, so he grabbed the possessions he couldn’t bear to part with, filling a small suitcase with them and several changes of warm clothes. The rest of the space in the truck was dedicated to food and supplies.

  His body ached from lifting five-gallon buckets of grains and legumes into the cargo bed. He tried to pack a variety of food, recalling what his father had said about the importance of a balanced diet in survival situations.

  As he packed, he worried about where he would spend the night. He dreaded sleeping in his truck out in the open, or breaking into someone’s empty house. But twelve hours was a long day of driving, especially when he hadn’t driven more than a couple miles in his entire life.

  Today, he paid one last visit to the graves in the backyard, where he couldn’t help but shed a few tears.

  “Goodbye,” he whispered. He hoped his family would somehow guide his way on the journey he was about to undertake. He hoped he could make them proud.

  He had planned a route avoiding Dallas. Even though he suspected the metropolis would be empty, he nevertheless didn’t want to risk navigating the huge city. It had been difficult to get around in Dallas even before the world fell apart, and he didn’t want to see how it had fared with the chaos of so many people dying at once.

  He took the on-ramp and entered the highway, navigating around abandoned cars. He shuddered as he saw the rotting corpses of drivers and passengers. Once he was on the open highway, he ventured to drive a little faster. Little by little, he was becoming more confident driving, and he began to make good time as he headed west.

  By the time he reached Hillsboro, he was at a half tank of gas. He had brought two spare cans filled with gas from his dad’s storage, but he wanted to save them for later. He knew that the farther west he went, toward the areas that had been scarcely populated even before Hosta, there would be fewer opportunities to find gas. He decided it was best to fill up whenever possible in Texas.

  He took the first exit and drove along the access road. There was a cluster of small houses situated just one block off the access road with several cars parked on the street and in the driveways. Thinking he would have a good chance of finding a vehicle with gas to siphon on this block, he turned down the road and parked the truck.

  Among his dad’s survival gear in the storage shed, he had found a small hand pump for siphoning gas. He grabbed the pump, along with some hose and an empty fuel can, and walked to an SUV parked in the driveway of a house.

  Glancing around the quiet street, he was struck by how unnaturally silent the world had become. This residential neighborhood was just as eerily calm as his own. The cars parked in front of the houses no doubt meant that their owners were lying dead behind the closed doors. He shuddered, and quickly approached the SUV. He wanted to get this chore over with.

  As he walked around the side of the SUV toward the fuel tank, he glanced inside the living room window of the home. There were two men lying dead inside: a big, bloated one on a couch, and a thin one sprawled across a recliner. He had seen so many corpses that he quickly turned his head without another thought.

  Suddenly, he heard a movement inside the home. With a start, he realized the men were not dead after all.

  “Hey! Did you hear that?” one of them anxiously said to the other inside the house.

  Their voices were muted, but Matt was close enough to the house to hear them. He froze in place, shielded from their view from where he stood behind the SUV. Silently, he rejoiced to hear the voices.

  Someone else was alive.

  “What?” came the second voice, groggy and deeper. Matt heard some movement from within the house. Apparently the two men were just waking up.

  “I said, did you hear that?”

  “No, man. There’s nothing out there. How many times do I have to tell you? Everyone’s dead in this crappy little town.”

  “I don’t know, man. I heard something.”

  Matt could scarcely contain his excitement. There were other survivors. He wanted to run to the door, to talk to the men. He wanted desperately to talk to anyone. But he decided to wait a bit longer. He wanted to make sure these guys were friendly.

  “You need to lay off the crystal. That shit makes you paranoid, dude,” said the deeper voice.

  More movement within the house.

  “I know what I heard,” said the fast-paced voice.

  Matt felt a chill run down his spine. The men were on drugs. So much for having someone to talk to. He wanted to dart away, but he didn’t want to risk being seen.

  “We need to get out of here,” said the first man. The hardwood floorboards creaked as he apparently paced back and forth across the living room. “There’s nothing left for us here, I’m telling you.”

  “Yeah? Where do you want to go?” the groggy voice mumbled.

  “Like I said, we need more shit. Dallas was full of it before, and now it’s all just free for the taking. I know it.”

  “Are you really that crazy that you don’t remember? No way am I going back to Dallas. Rex will kill me if he sees me back there. And he has his men stationed all over the city. You know he’s got a price on my head for trying to take his woman. Besides, half the city burned up.”

  “All right, Houston then. They got good shit down there too. I’m going to need some, like, soon. Let’s go right now. I’m ready.”

  Matt tensed up as he heard the man walk toward the door. They were about to leave.

  Where could he go that they wouldn’t see him? They sounded dangerous. Matt looked wildly around, trying to find a place he could run and hide.

  As the doorknob slowly turned, Matt’s throat started to close. He couldn’t let them see him.

  “Sit down,” the deeper voice ordered. “We’re not going anywhere until I come down.”

  Matt exhaled as the man returned to his recliner and collapsed in it, judging from the sounds inside.

  “Whatever. Toss me that shit,” said the fast-paced voice.

  Without waiting to hear anymore, Matt took the opportunity to scurry back to his truck. He quietly opened the door and climbed inside. His hands shook as he turned the key, the engine roaring to life.

  Just as he pulled away from the curb, he turned to see the door of the house fly open. A skinny, ragged man stood in the doorway and aimed a pistol at Matt’s truck.

  “Come back here, you asshole!”

  Matt stomped on the gas, and the truck hurtled down the road. Behind him, the man fired two shots, missing badly.

  The man ran into the road, waving his gun in the air and screaming after Matt.

  “I’ll teach you not to spy on us! I know who you are! You’ve been following me. Next time you’re dead!”

  Matt drove up the road, then turned down a side road. Speeding through the quiet neighborhood, he arrived back at the highway quickly.

  Only when he had put a dozen miles between himself and Hillsboro without seeing anyone following him in the rear
-view mirror, was he able to stop shaking.

  13

  When Nick woke up and came out of his room back home at the lodge, Liz and Mia were waiting for him with worried looks on their faces.

  “Jessa’s gone,” Mia said.

  Charlie came out of his room, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “What?” he asked, befuddled.

  “Jessa went to Colorado to check on a friend,” Mia said.

  “She told Mia she’ll be back in a couple of days,” Liz said. “She didn’t even tell the rest of us goodbye. I hope she’s all right. I’m worried sick about her.”

  Damn it.

  Nick had thought she’d decided against her Colorado trip. Just when things were starting to look up. Though on second thought, that’s probably why she decided to go now.

  “She’ll be all right,” Nick said.

  He didn’t say much else. He didn’t tell the others that he was worried too.

  Nick returned the crow caw he heard while he was working on the woodpile again.

  Daniel, his dad Raymond, and his cousin Martin crossed the meadow. They arrived at the house, and everyone eagerly crowded around them for introductions, happy to meet new people.

  “We thought the rest of your people might like to visit Los Gatos,” Daniel said.

  “And we thought you might be interested in some trade,” Raymond added.

  A grin spread over Nick’s face. “We’d definitely be interested in some trade. And as for the visit to Los Gatos, I’m up for it. What you think, Mia? Do you want to go see where our neighbors live?”

  Mia smiled shyly and nodded.

  “Of course she does!” Liz said. “We’re all dying to get out of this house.”

  Raymond smiled and looked around. “It looks like you have a nice place here. You’ve been doing good work in the garden.”

  “We’re all pretty new to this type of thing, but we’re trying,” Nick said. “Liz has been studying some garden books, and that’s helped a lot.”

  “I hope you’ve got the soil fertile,” Raymond said. “This mountain dirt up here is pretty nutrient-poor.”

  “That much we do know,” Nick said. “We had an… interesting trip to Santa Fe to get some topsoil and fertilizer last week. And now we’ve got a compost heap going for next year.”

  Raymond nodded, then remembered something. “Isn’t there someone missing?”

  Nick’s face fell just a bit. “Yeah, that’s Jessa. She left this morning to drive up to Colorado. She’s got a friend up there she’s hoping survived the virus.”

  Daniel raised his eyebrows. “And she drove all the way up there alone? I hope she’s armed.”

  “That she is. We’re hoping for the best,” Nick said, looking down to see Mia’s worried face. “We’re expecting her back in a couple of days.”

  “I’m sure she’ll be fine,” Raymond said reassuringly. “Well, we’ll give you some time to get ready. Anything you don’t have use for, bring it along and we’ll see what we can swap out.”

  “Okay, sounds good,” Nick said as he pulled out some chairs for the men to sit in while they waited.

  Mia brought them some glasses of water, then returned to the kitchen where Nick, Charlie, and Liz were gathered.

  “We have a lot of packaged food,” Liz said. “They might like some cookies or soda every now and then. I know they have all that delicious fresh food, but who doesn’t like a sugar fix once in a while?”

  “Yeah, we could spare some,” Nick replied. “At this point, we have more bags of chocolate than we’d need for the rest of our lives. Let’s pack up a box or two of food, then we’ll see if we have any tools we have extras of.”

  “We don’t need all those books,” Mia said.

  “That’s something I never expected you to say,” Liz said, smiling.

  “Well, we’ve already read a few of them. We might as well pass them along, right?” Mia asked.

  “I’ll let you be in charge of the books, Mia,” Nick said. “I’ll go out and look at the tools.”

  Charlie snapped his fingers. “I’ve got all those cans of fuel I brought from home. We don’t need all of those since we found that gas storage tank. And I bet they could put them to use in Los Gatos, since they haven’t gotten out as much as we have.”

  “Good thinking,” Nick said before he went out to the tool shed.

  Between the four of them, they gathered up a small collection of valuable things to trade. Nick scratched his head. “Well, it’s not much, but it’s all we have to spare right now.”

  “Yeah, this won’t get us much in trade, but that’s okay,” Liz said. “The important thing is that we have friendly neighbors.”

  Nick agreed silently. To be honest, he was pleasantly surprised that these folks wanted to trade with them at all. The people in Los Gatos were nearly self-sufficient, and there probably wasn’t much they were lacking.

  He figured the trade was more about forming an alliance – a way to seal the deal. That was just fine with him. An alliance with a large group of neighbors was invaluable.

  They packed the items up in backpacks and filed out onto the porch to find the three men waiting patiently.

  “All ready?” Raymond asked.

  “All ready.”

  Nick and Raymond led the way, with the others chattering excitedly as they walked behind them.

  In Los Gatos, Liz, Charlie, and Nick spread the items out on a large patio table in front of Raymond’s house.

  “I’m afraid it isn’t much,” Nick said. “Unfortunately, we weren’t as prepared as we would have liked. These are the only things we have to trade.”

  He looked over at Raymond, Daniel, and Anne as they surveyed the items casually. Sylvia and some of the others from the village were there as well. An even larger table had been set up nearby, and it was heaped over with what seemed like an endless supply of treasures from the families.

  Chicken and duck eggs, garden fresh vegetables, goat cheese, jars of honey, and freshly baked bread occupied one section of the table. Nearby were hand-knit scarves, socks, and hats. A few handwoven baskets and ceramic pots were filled with some small tools, and a small assortment of herbal salves and medicinal tinctures were on the table as well.

  A gorgeous fixed blade knife like the one Daniel had lay shining on the table. There was even an elaborate corn husk doll in the corner that Nick noticed Mia was looking at.

  The offerings from the Los Gatos families made the stuff from Nick’s lodge pale in comparison. He figured their own measly things might be worth some of the food and maybe a few warm pairs of socks.

  Anne glanced at Raymond and gave him a small nod.

  “Okay. If you accept this trade, we do as well,” Raymond said decisively.

  Nick was confused. “Which things do you want to trade?”

  “All of it,” Anne said simply.

  “Do you mean you want to trade everything on your table for everything on our table?” Charlie asked doubtfully.

  “That’s what we mean,” Raymond said.

  Nick looked at Liz and Charlie, then at Mia. They were speechless.

  “We can’t accept all this,” Nick began. “It’s not a fair trade to you. You’re giving us way too much.”

  Anne took a step forward. “You saved our son’s life. I only wish it were more.”

  “But you folks need all these things,” Nick protested. “The winter’s coming, and I don’t want you to go without.”

  “We won’t go without,” Raymond said firmly. “Please, take these things with our blessings.”

  Nick looked at Daniel, who met his gaze and nodded once.

  Anne took the doll and placed it gently in Mia’s hands. “Do you like this?”

  Mia nodded. “I love it. Thank you.”

  Anne looked up at Nick and smiled.

  “It’s a good trade,” she said.

  Driving home, Nick smiled, thinking about their good fortune. More than the generous gifts, it was nice to have friends. And it
was a relief to know that there were still good people in the world.

  All he needed now was for Jessa to return home in one piece. She had promised not to be gone longer than two or three days. That would put her back tomorrow or the next day.

  She’ll probably get back tomorrow, he thought to himself. He tried to ignore the nagging worry he felt about her.

  14

  Jessa was approaching Denver. It had been a long drive, and she was looking forward to arriving at her destination soon. On the outskirts of town, she exited the interstate.

  She needed to load up on gas, and there appeared to be several gas stations and businesses off the next exit. Wherever there were businesses, there were usually abandoned cars to be found. And some of them were sure to have gas she could siphon.

  She pulled into a massive truck stop and parked her light green pickup in the side parking lot. She grabbed her gear and approached a nearby Dodge Neon. It was parked neatly within the lines of a parking space.

  Using her double tubing system, she quickly found that the gas tank was empty. She moved on to a van parked nearby. Also empty.

  She had barely eaten all day, and her growling stomach was getting the best of her. She decided to continue the search for gas after raiding the truck stop for edible food.

  The store had long before been broken into, and the glass from the bashed-in door crunched under her boots as she walked inside. She was relieved to find a lot of food remained on the shelves, even though it had been picked through. It was a large truck stop, and she passed through aisles of trinkets and souvenirs before she arrived at the main food section.

  Taking a few cans of tuna and chicken, she threw them into her backpack before moving on to the salty snack section. She crossed the aisles to the back of the store in search of bottles of Gatorade, but she froze when she heard the front door opening.

  She quietly withdrew her Glock from its holster as she heard the sound of men entering. They stepped over the broken glass, talking loudly.

  “I don’t know, Will. It just seems crazy to me. I still can’t believe you shot that guy.”