Borrowed Time

by CJ Lyons

  CHAPTER 31

  Josh opened the front door to his house, and Hershey bounded out.

  Despite his attempts at conversation during the ride home, Kate still hadn’t said anything. He knew she was upset that she’d let Blake escape when she saw him in the ICU—but damn it, what could she have done?

  “It wasn’t your fault,” he had told her, only to be met with a glare and an upraised eyebrow.

  Now she stood at attention, her gaze darting past him, scrutinizing the interior of the house, then turning to examine the street for any unwelcome presence. She was in full cop mode, he realized, wondering if he changed as much when he entered the OR or a trauma room.

  “I think I’ll take a walk,” she said, her eyes still scanning the street. She turned and began down the porch steps.

  He grabbed Hershey’s lead from the hook inside the door, locked it behind him and jogged after her. “Good idea.” He kept his tone nonchalant. “I need a break after staring at that computer all morning.”

  They’d both missed lunch, but he was too keyed up, knowing Blake was out there, looking for her, to feel hunger. Hershey led them along his favorite path into Frick Park, and they walked in silence. Josh could see that she was making a decision of some kind. It didn’t take a genius to realize it had something to do with him. She kept cutting her eyes at him, her face alternating between concern and anger.

  They stopped at an empty swing-set. Hershey treed a squirrel and flopped down looking proud of himself while Josh and Kate sat on the swings.

  “I can’t do this anymore,” she finally spoke. “I can’t take you down with me. God, the way Cohen treated you, and Turner—“ Her jaw clenched in anger, her feet dug trenches in the wood chips. “It’s all my fault. I never should have let it go this far.”

  That’s what was upsetting her? Josh shook his head and laughed. “A bunch of cops think I’m lucky enough to be sleeping with you, and you think that bothers me?”

  Her head jerked up, and she shot him a look that said he was a half-wit. “Because you’re better than that, because they’re talking about you behind your back, laughing—” She stopped as he reached across and took her hand, pulled her over to sit on his lap in the swing. “What are you doing?”

  He pushed off and pumped his legs hard, quickly gaining speed and height. He wrapped one arm around her waist, snugging her to him, while the other gripped the chain. “Hush, just forget about everything. Lean back, close your eyes.”

  She resisted for a moment, then wrapped her legs around his so they moved in tandem. Her body relaxed as they swung up and fell back to earth again.

  As the wind rushed past, Josh buried his face in her hair, enjoying the momentum, the feeling of almost-flight. Why was it his soap and shampoo smelled different on her? She smelled so good, crisp and fresh like a spring day.

  “I used to love this when I was a kid,” she said, her voice distant, her eyes still shut. “The rush of falling, of being free from everything, even gravity, for a split second. Letting go of everything, being out of control—it was intoxicating.”

  Josh smiled at that. And she called him a control freak. He’d never met a woman as very much in control as Kate. Or a woman who had affected him as she had. He remembered waking up this morning, excited just to sit and watch her breathe as the morning light filtered into his bedroom.

  And now, her body losing its rigidity, relaxing into his, he couldn’t think of a more pleasant way to spend an afternoon. Her own thoughts must have echoed his, because she sighed. “This is nice.”

  They swung for several minutes, before Josh gradually slowed to a stop. He still kept his arm tight around her, enjoying the weight of her against him, not even minding too much the gun jabbing him through her jacket.

  “You’re one tough lady, O’Hern,” he said, his lips brushing against the nape of her neck. Her cheeks were flushed from the wind, the color highlighted the freckles that crossed her nose. “That’s one of the things I love about you.”

  She tensed against him, but he held her firmly in place, determined to say what he needed to say. “I love how stubborn you are and the way you notice everything and don’t take anything for granted and the way you walk like an Old West gunslinger even when you don’t have your gun and the way you look when you’re asleep and especially the freckles on the bridge of your nose. I love it all.”

  There, he’d said it. Finally. The rest was up to her.

  He relaxed his hold, feeling as if a weight had been lifted from him. She hopped off the swing, turned to face him. Josh smiled. He’d seen her startled, angry and in pain, even frightened, but he’d never seen such a look of amazement on her face before. He had the feeling she wasn’t often surprised.

  “Are you nuts?” she demanded, her good hand fisted on her hip, weight thrown forward as if he was a toddler, and she was getting ready to give him a spanking. The image that accompanied the thought only widened his grin.

  “In case you haven’t noticed,” she spoke as if to the village idiot, “I have enough to deal with right now without you—what are you thinking, saying something like that? I mean look at me, Josh, and look at you, how could you possibly be in love with—“

  Josh stood up and framed her face with his hands, clamping his lips over hers before she could argue more. She resisted him for a fleeting moment, then her mouth opened beneath his, and she pulled him in with a hunger that matched his own. His fingers twisted in her hair, silky dark strands curling in his grip.

  Heat stirred in his groin as he shifted his weight to press his body against the length of hers. Her free hand moved up to wrap around his neck, tugging him closer to her.

  Just as the passion building between them was becoming irresistible, she slid her hand down against his chest, and pushed him back. Cold air slapped at Josh’s face where her lips had pressed an instant before. She took a deep breath, shook her head and walked away, into the trees.

  “This is not a good idea,” she muttered.

  Oh, yes it was. This was the best idea he’d had in a long time. He just had to figure out a way to convince her of that. Josh whistled to Hershey and followed. He caught up to her in a small clearing. She turned to him, her back against an oak tree and stared at him. The same, right-to-remain-silent stare she had used on Cohen earlier today.

  Josh reached a hand to her arm, wishing he could touch her, feel the warmth of her skin instead of the leather jacket she wore. “I love you, Kate. What’s so bad about that?”

  “In case you haven’t noticed, Lightner, the men close to me have a bad habit of getting killed.”

  He moved in, one arm on each side of her, pinned her to the tree and looked down on her. “I can take care of myself.”

  A bitter laugh vibrated through her as she recognized her own words thrown back in her face. Then her eyes widened as she looked into his. “God, you’re serious, aren’t you? You have no idea—”

  He ended her protest with another kiss. This one longer, deeper, left him trembling. “I know my timing stinks. I’m not too happy about it either. It’s against the rules for a doctor to become involved with a patient, but I can’t help it. I’ve been involved—hell, I feel like I’ve been in over my head—ever since that first night. You’ve been constantly on my mind, and if you’re leaving tomorrow, there’s no more time.”

  She merely stared at him, her eyes searching his. Her silence was killing him, burrowing into his gut. He lowered his hands, turned away, tried to ignore the tearing in his chest that was his heart breaking. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. You don’t need me adding to your problems.”

  Problems? Josh was the one good thing that had happened to her. He was the man of Kate’s dreams, the man of any woman’s dreams, but she couldn’t let this go any further. She couldn’t tell him how he made her feel, how his kiss could erase her pain, his touch restore her balance. It was too dangerous, for both of them.

  “My life’s been spinning out of control ever sinc
e I met you, Lightner.”

  “Then, maybe you should stop fighting it.”

  “I’m serious.”

  “So am I.”

  She narrowed her eyes at him, began pacing across the clearing. Hershey followed her, tail wagging, wondering what the game was, while Josh leaned against the tree, ankles crossed in front of him as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

  And he wouldn’t—not once she was out of his life. He wouldn’t have to worry about his medical ethics, about either curing her visions or deciding if she was nuts, about a cop-killer—

  As she passed him, he pushed away from the tree, stepped into her path. “Tell me you don’t feel anything, Kate, and I won’t say another word. I’ll go back to being only your surgeon.”

  His gaze was so earnest, so hopeful, his eyes penetrated to her soul. Kate tried to break away, but she couldn’t resist, it was as if something in him called to her—just as he had called her back from death.

  She raised a hand to his face, traced his cheekbones, his lips, felt his body tremble at her touch. Standing on tip-toe, she captured his lips with hers, surrendering to her need and desire as she never had with any man before.

  His hands caught her waist, drawing her close. A small noise came from one of them, but Kate was too lost in the embrace to know who made it. Her fingers raked through his hair as she sank deeper into his warmth. She liked that he kept his eyes open, their blue the color of a sunlit lake, and she felt herself dropping into their depths.

  Falling, whirling, spinning totally out of control.

  Finally they parted long enough for him to whisper, “Stay with me, Kate. Don’t go.”

  That brought her up short. She pulled back, fought for breathing space. The memory of her visions swarmed over her, left her gut roiling and the taste of fear burning in her throat. “Josh, I saw him kill you! You need to stay as far away from me as you can. Where’d you say your folks lived? Florida?”

  “I’m not leaving you.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his warmth. She hadn’t even realized that she was shaking until he stopped it with his reassuring presence.

  “This is nothing to joke about,” she protested, cursing herself for taking refuge in his arms when she should be pushing him away, finding him a safe hiding place. It was her job to protect, not his.

  He snagged her hand back in his. “It’s all right, Kate. Together we can solve this, I know we can.”

  There was that confidence again. Once upon a time, before last week, she used to feel that way about life as well. Kate looked around the clearing with its looming shadows and skittish breezes rustling the trees. Blake could be out there, right now, watching.

  “Are you upset with me for telling you how I feel?” he asked as she led him from the darkness back onto the path.

  “Not upset. Just surprised. You don’t know anything about me, about the person I was before last week.”

  “Sure I do. You’re brave and strong and smart. You listen to people and look at what really is going on around you, not just what you want to see or what would be convenient to see. You never take the easy way if it would leave the job half-done or make someone else’s life tougher. You have no idea how to wash windows and don’t own a mop or an iron and your most prized possession is an autographed picture of Lynn Swann with a man I’m guessing is your father.”

  She stopped him. “How did you know that?”

  “The iron? That was easy—”

  “No, about the picture.”

  “It’s the only clean thing in your apartment.” The grin he gave her made his eyes crinkle, sparkle with life. She had to work hard to resist the impulse to wrap her arms around him again, to run away, take him someplace warm and safe, far away from this nightmare that her life had become.

  “My mom took that picture when she and Dad ran into Lynn Swann at the airport. They were going to Arizona.” She smiled with the memory. Her mom wanted to see the Grand Canyon before she died. Only vacation Kate could remember her parents ever taking alone, just the two of them. “When she got the picture developed, she sent it to Mr. Swann and asked him to autograph it. He sent it back, but it was too late, she was gone already.”

  She broke off. Those last few months, it seemed as if her mother had spent more time preparing the rest of the family for what was to come, taking care of them, than she had spent in preparing herself. As if she had a checklist to finish before time ran out. But time caught up with her before she finished everything.

  Kate couldn’t help but wonder if her mom had felt the same sense of panic, of time running short that she did now.

  Josh said nothing, his thumb caressing her hand as they stood on the sidewalk outside his house, the last remnants of the setting sun casting them in deep velvet shadows. Kate was grateful for his silence, if he’d tried to comfort her, she probably would have fallen apart. Funny, how after all these years, feelings like this could still sneak up on her. She sniffed hard, regained control.

  She looked up at him, gave him a tiny smile. “I think she would have liked you.”

  He bent close, kissed her on the forehead. They strolled the last few steps arm in arm.

  Blake watched out the sidelight, inching the sheer curtain aside with the Taurus’ muzzle. The sun was setting, made the steel barrel glint like something out of the movies.

  It felt like something out of the movies, the way things were falling into place. The hardest part of gaining access to Lightner’s house was breaking into his neighbor’s and crossing through her cluttered basement without breaking something.

  Now here he was ready and waiting. And here they came, looking like something out of a cheesy love story, holding hands like a couple of kids, the dog walking along beside them.

  Anger flared through Blake at the sight. O’Hern was his and his alone.

  The dog ran up the steps, a black streak, lunging at the door as if he saw Blake.

  Maybe he would finish it all here tonight. Forget the cemetery.

  Hershey bounded up the porch steps and began prancing in front of the door. Kate looked up at the amiable dog and couldn’t help but smile. Josh held her hand as they climbed the steps. It all felt so normal, so natural. A man, a woman, a dog, coming home out of a cold, November night. A man, a woman, a home. A man in love. With her.

  A man she loved? Kate backed away from the thought without examining it too closely. Josh’s hand felt so warm in hers, so strong and safe. Couldn’t she take a moment to enjoy that? To bask in the glow of what he had told her.

  Josh fell as the crack of a gunshot split the silence. Blood blossomed over the back of his jacket. Hershey howled, rushed to his master’s side. Carter’s voice called her name, shouting at her to take cover, as he ran across the street. Kate turned to look for the shooter, to target the direction of danger, her Baretta in her hand. Another shot, where did it come from? Carter was down, sprawled on the pavement. A low noise came from Josh. She dropped her gun, tried one-handed to pull him up the steps to safety when pain ripped through her chest. She toppled forward, her vision darkening as laughter rang through the air.

  CHAPTER 34

  “Kate. Kate.” Josh’s voice broke through the dark abyss she had fallen into.

  “What’s wrong with her?” Carter sounded anxious, scared even. Very unlike him. How had he gotten there? “Want me to call 911?”

  Kate was drowning in darkness, thick tendrils of blood sucking her in, weighing her down. Her limbs had vanished, there was no pain, just an absence of feeling as if she’d been divorced from her body.

  “No. Just help me get her inside.”

  Was that really Josh? Was he all right?

  Anxiety, a need to see for herself that Josh was safe and whole, pulled her back from the void. Strong hands carried her inside, she heard Hershey’s paws clicking on the wood floors, then felt the supple leather of Josh’s couch. Mustering the energy to open her eyes, Kate looked around.

  Josh knelt beside her, his fi
ngers on her wrist, taking her pulse. Her heart rate fluttered. There was no blood; he wasn’t hurt. Carter stood behind him, one hand on his service weapon, the other holding Hershey’s collar. The dog was whimpering, trying to pull away and get to Kate.

  “I’m fine,” she told Josh, ignoring her head-rush as she sat up. “Carter, did you get him? The shooter?” Carter frowned at her as if she wasn’t making sense. She supposed she wasn’t, not to him. “Blake, did you catch him?”

  Josh sat on his heels. “Kate, there was no shooter. Nobody except Carter getting out of his car right before you fainted.”

  “You know damn well I didn’t faint.” She appreciated his efforts to protect her, but she had to warn Carter of the danger he was in. They were all in.

  Carter arched an eyebrow at her, then turned to Josh. “These things, what you told me in the hospital, they’re for real?”

  Kate answered for herself. “Yes. Don’t make me try to explain them, because I can’t.”

  Carter pursed his lips. He scrutinized her over the tops of his glasses, his brow wrinkled. “Hmmph.”

  “I saw the three of us, outside, Hershey’s there as well. Blake shoots us. All.” Carter straightened at that. Josh squeezed her hand, and she pulled it away, turned to him. “Josh, you can’t stay here.”

  “Like hell I can’t.”

  “You have to leave.”

  “This,” Carter gestured to the couch, “happen every time you have one of these premonitions?”

  Kate looked down at the floor; she knew what he was asking. “Yeah. I kind of black out for a few minutes when they happen.”

  “You should have told me.”

  “And have you treat me like a freak like Phil Conrad did when I tried to warn him? Besides, no one would trust anything I say if they think my head’s messed up.”