A Leap of Faith

by T Gephart

  Hannah was another story, I did feel bad about not having her there but knew that she wasn’t able to fly in her last trimester. Alex and I promised her that we would have a gathering of our friends and family to celebrate sometime in the near future and that appeased her slightly but I knew I would have to do a lot more than have a party to make it up to her. I even threw around the idea of another simple ceremony. How ironic was it that I had never even wanted to get married and now I was willing to do a repeat performance of it.

  For the first time, possibly ever, I didn’t feel the need to keep moving. If I stood still in this moment forever then it would be ok. I was happy, but more than that, I was at peace.

  “What are you thinking about?” Alex whispered, pulling me from my thoughts.

  “Just that I’m happy,” I smiled as I squeezed his hand.

  “Good.” Alex nuzzled my neck, “Now might be a good time to discuss living arrangements. Where should I tell TJ to drop us off?”

  Crap! I hadn’t even thought about it! Where were we going to live? My place? Alex’s? Somewhere new? Usually a couple has months to decide little things such as a marital address prior to the wedding but then it wouldn’t be my style to do things in a “traditional” way.

  “I can stay somewhere else guys, give you your space if you want to head back to the apartment?” Matt offered, his beautiful smile not showing the slightest bit of annoyance at possibly having to find a new place to live.

  “No, that’s stupid! Alex’s place is bigger. We can stay there for now.” I answered quickly, wanting to bring the debate to an end before it began.

  “Lexi, are you sure? I feel like I’m kicking you out of your place.” Matt leaned forward in his seat.

  “Matt, please! I’m sure. You are staying in my apartment. End of discussion.”

  “Trust me Matt, don’t argue with her. Besides, my apartment is closer to 5th Avenue. Don’t fool yourself, it’s always about the stores.” Alex smirked.

  Matt laughed as he nodded in agreement, “Thanks, I guess I’ll be helping you pack...again”

  “Uggghhh. I’ll take stuff gradually. I can’t deal with boxes again.” I rolled my eyes at the thought. “And FYI 5th Avenue had nothing to do with it.” I shot Matt a cheeky wink.

  “Baby, I love you... but I think every store assistant in the greater Manhattan area knows your name and your shoe size.” Alex’s lips curled into his delicious half grin.

  “I’m just friendly…” I countered.

  Alex was exaggerating, it wasn’t every store but sure there are a few who knew me on a first name basis. It’s not that they have my number, unless you count Heather from Versace, but that was only so she can word me up when they go on sale. I’m a sucker for a Versace cocktail dress.

  Alex raised one eyebrow in silent challenge to prove him wrong. I instead snuggled into his side, biting my lip not willing to admit defeat.

  TJ drove into the undercover garage of Alex’s apartment. As expected there were hordes of fans camped on the street awaiting our arrival, the NYPD doing their best to move the crowds on.

  “Thanks TJ.” Alex reached across to the front seat and patted him on the back.

  TJ nodded in recognition as he stopped the car.

  “Don’t forget dinner at my house tonight! Hannah will go ballistic if you don’t turn up.” James called out as Alex stepped out of the SUV.

  “We’ll be there,” Alex acknowledged as he turned to help me out of the car.

  “Just a heads up - she’s still kind of cranky.” James nervously smiled.

  “It will be fine James,” I reassured as I waved goodbye to the rest of the group, “see you in a few hours.”

  I closed the car door and watched as the SUV disappeared back onto the street.

  Alex pulled me into him as we walked to the elevator. Our luggage was arriving later so we didn’t have to wrestle with bags and it was nice to finally be just the two of us after two months of being on the road. He pressed the button for his floor and I sunk into his side. I was mentally tired even though I was physically alert. We climbed slowly until the elevator alerted us with a loud ding that we had arrived.

  As we walked to Alex’s front door, a strange feeling overcame me. This would now be my home, not just a place I lived, but where I would build a life with Alex. The space wasn’t unfamiliar to me, after all I had spent many night here, but now I looked at it with different eyes. I knew there had been other women here, but it seemed insignificant now. This was where we had spent those first few nights together, both of us in love with each other yet too afraid to admit it. It seemed right that this was where we ended up.

  Alex paused as we stood in front of his doorway, pulling my body closer into his. “Welcome home baby.” He tilted my head and kissed me passionately. We walked through the door, our bodies intertwined, our lips hungry for each other.

  Alex kicked the door shut behind us, unwilling to let his hands leave my body. He led me through the entrance way and into the living room where an extra large leather couch sat in the middle of the room.

  I collapsed onto his strong muscular body, his hypnotic clear blue eyes locked on mine. It was as if nothing else existed. It was just us.

  “I’ll never tire of this,” Alex whispered as he kissed the top of my head, “Just being with you, loving you.”

  I smiled as I brushed his cheek, the sincerity of his words touching my heart. I was loved.

  ~~~~~~~

  We had fallen asleep in each other’s arms. The weeks of travel had taken its toll and the relief of finally being home hit some kind of release valve that unlocked unsated fatigue and weariness.

  Alex stretched beneath me. “You want me to call Han and tell her we’re going to be late?” His smile betrayed his thoughts.

  “No, lets go get this over with. When I get you into that bed, I can guarantee I won’t be letting you leave for at least three days.” I ran my hand down his amazing chest.

  “Mmmmmmm. I like the sound of that.” Alex mumbled as he licked my neck.

  “Stop that!” I protested, “Or we’ll never leave.”

  “Ok, Ok. I’m getting a shower. Care to join me?” Alex’s eyes gleamed with mischief as he sat up.

  “As much as I would love that, I need to take care of a few things before we leave. I need to finalize Anna’s paperwork. I’ll get one after you.” I sat up, my limbs stiff from my awkward sleeping position.

  Alex stood, kicking off his shoes and socks before lifting his fitted shirt over his head, showcasing his amazing physique. His faded blue jeans hug low on his hips, his sculpted abs flexing as he stretched his arms above his head.

  “You objectifying me again?” Alex smirked as he caught me watching him.

  “Just appreciating my husband.” I rose to stand in front of him, kissing him before sauntering off to retrieve my MacBook.

  “Tease.” Alex laughed as he strode into the bathroom.

  I heard the water turn on as I flicked on my computer. Lately it had seemed my emails were never ending. Alex sung loudly in the shower as I sorted through my inbox, mostly work related and all of them predictably about US.

  A loud trill came from behind me causing me to jump. Alex had left his phone on the couch and it was ringing. I watched its illuminated screen fade as it went to voice mail. I felt sorry for who ever called, knowing the chances of Alex returning the call were slim to none.

  I returned to my inbox, when again I was disrupted by Alex’s loud ring tone. Grrrrrrrr “ALEX… YOUR PHONE IS RINGING” I screamed out, knowing the chances of him hearing me where low.

  I didn’t hear a response, my vain attempt of getting his attention had been drowned out by the water and Alex’s singing.

  The ringing ceased a second time, once again directed to voice mail. Curiosity got the better of me and I decided to see who was so desperate to get Alex’s attention. He’d only been back in town a few hours. Maybe it was his mother or brother?

  I picked up A
lex’s iPhone as the screen once again lit up with an incoming call.

  MARCY BRYANT

  Are you fucking kidding? What the hell does she want with Alex? He made himself pretty clear in Rome that he wasn’t interested. They weren’t even friends anymore, she had to know her calls wouldn’t be welcomed.

  I knew that I shouldn’t, but I could help myself. I answered.

  “Hello Marcy.” I was unable to hide my venomous tone.

  “uhhhhh... uhhhhh... Lexi?” Marcy sounded off guard and flustered.

  “Yes, it’s Lexi. What is it that you want Marcy?” My agitation was growing by the second.

  “I...I...just wanted to talk to Alex. I didn’t like the way things were left. I thought we could make amends.” I could hear how nervous she was in her voice. She had wanted to speak to Alex and she wasn’t prepared to speak with me.

  “Well Marcy, while I don’t speak for Alex I am fairly sure he has nothing more to say to you. I’m sure you have heard that we recently got married?” I tried not to sound too cocky but the truth was I was enjoying making her squirm.

  “Ummmm, Yeah.... I heard,” Marcy stuttered.

  “So do yourself a favour and gain some self respect. It’s really not attractive to be chasing after someone’s husband.” I felt the smile creep on my lips as I ended the call. Dumb, desperate bitch!

  “Who was that?” Alex walked in, a low slung towel clinging to his hips, his body still damp from the shower.

  “Ughhhhh Marcy.” I tossed Alex his phone.

  He smoothed his tousled hair as he scrolled through the screen of his phone.

  “What did she want?” Alex arched his brow, seeing that she had called repeatedly.

  “To be “friends”, or so she says.” I walked over to Alex, determined to show him that I had grown and no longer felt threatened by her.

  Alex took me in his arms, the dampness of his chest seeping through my light cotton shirt. “Well, I have enough “friends” so she is shit out of luck.”

  I smiled at his answer, while I was no longer worried about her, I didn’t want her poisonous bullshit anywhere near Alex.

  “We aren’t going to fight about this, are we?” Alex tilted my chin so I gazed into his eyes.

  “No Alex, I’m not wasting a minute of our precious time on that talentless trash with a bad dye job and cheap ass shoes. I know you love me and I love you.” I meant it. Marcy would not get what she wanted, she would not get under my skin.

  “God you are sexy when you trash talk.” Alex laughed. “And I’m glad that we are finally in a good place.”

  “Me too.” I smiled.

  “Now, go get ready before I call Hannah and tell her we aren’t going to make it cause I need to make love to my wife.” Alex growled, his eyes conveying he was only half joking.

  “There is always the pool house,” I joked as I slowly and seductively started removing my clothing.

  Alex’s eyes darkened as I stood before him naked. A low growl spilled from his lips.

  “Fuck it, we’re going to be late.”

  ~~~~~~

  “Lexi! Alex!” Hannah squealed as we entered the games room.

  We were running about 30 minutes late and Troy, Jason, Dan and James were already relaxing, beers in hand.

  “Finally, Han wouldn’t let us eat until you got here.” Dan smirked as he walked over to greet us.

  “It’s not like you are going to starve Dan.” Hannah snapped, her face wearing her fatigue and discomfort. She was due to deliver in two weeks and while her pregnancy had been problem free, the last few weeks had taken their toll. She was tired and irritable and found it difficult to move with her bulging belly.

  “Easy, Han. It’s not like I stole your freaking peanut butter fudge. Though it wouldn’t kill you to share,” Dan stupidly fired back.

  “What are you saying, Asshole? That I’m fat? Is that what I look like? A Big Fat Girl who stuffs her face with fudge? I had a fucking craving.” Hannah’s face flushed with anger.

  Holy Shit! James wasn’t kidding when he said Hannah was cranky. I had never seen her like this. She was usually the most level headed and relaxed of the group. She hated confrontation.

  Dan froze as he realized he was out of his depth, looking around helplessly for any assistance as he backed away from Hannah.

  “Hey, Hannah.” I hugged her tenderly. “Why don’t I help you finish up dinner and make us some virgin Margaritas? No way I’m drinking beer!” I screwed up my face to convey my disgust.

  “I’m sorry,” Hannah sobbed. “I don’t know what’s gotten into me. These last few days I feel like shit. I hate it, then I feel guilty cause I should feel euphoric like they say in all the books. I don’t feel euphoric, I’m not fucking glowing. I haven’t seen my feet in months, everything hurts and I need to pee every two minutes. I’m a horrible mother and the baby hasn’t even been born yet.” Hannah wept into my shoulder.

  James looked on nervously, unsure what to do. The other guys shot each other scared looks unable to handle a pregnant, emotional woman, especially one who last time they had seen her had been rational and happy.

  I rubbed Hannah’s back gently, “Hey, you are an amazing woman and you are going to be an amazing mother! Of course you feel like shit, you have another person growing inside of you, literally sucking the life out of you. Who cares what those books said, yes it’s a beautiful thing but it’s a big fucking deal Han. It’s sure as hell not easy and it’s a big ask of a body. I saw Kate go through it four times and while the end result was a beautiful, healthy baby she was an unbearable bitch the weeks before delivery.”

  Hannah relaxed, her gentle sobs easing slightly, “Really? I feel like some kind of a freak. I was thinking there was something wrong with me.”

  “There is nothing wrong with you, everything you are feeling is perfectly normal. Just don’t be so hard on yourself.” I hugged Hannah tightly.

  “Come on, let’s get those drinks. You can yell at me about getting married without you.” I laughed.

  Hannah smiled as she wiped her eyes. “I’m still pissed about that.”

  James looked at me and mouthed a relieved, silent thank you as I ushered Hannah out of the room.

  I improvised with some fruit juice and crushed ice and made something resembling a cocktail as Hannah pulled a massive tray of lasagna out of the oven.

  James came in to check if his wife was ok, gently rubbing her back and kissing her tenderly before she shooed him out of the kitchen, instructing him to set the table.

  Everyone had gathered in the dinning room, taking their seats as they called out praise for the wonderful feast that lay before them. After two months on the road, a home cooked meal was a little piece of heaven.

  “You are amazing.” Alex whispered as he slid into his seat beside me.

  “Me? Why?” I asked, pulling the napkin into my lap.

  “You were so good with her.” Alex motioned to Hannah, “You knew exactly what to say.”

  “Yeah people I know, I know exactly how to handle people. Besides as I said, I remember what Kate went through. It’s kids I’m worried about.” I whispered back.

  “Kids are just smaller people Baby.” Alex smirked.

  “Yeah, Yeah. Pass the salad Smart-Ass” I bumped Alex’s shoulder with mine.

  After her initial outburst, Hannah relaxed and while still a little fragile, the conversation through dinner was easy and light.

  James, Troy, Jason, Dan and Alex were slowly becoming more “animated” as the beer bottles piled up. I smiled in the secret knowledge that Alex’s “merriment” would ensure I would be driving the Maserati home. I kept Hannah company, drinking our glorified fruit juice even though she insisted I didn’t have to.

  Dan’s phone chimed from his pocket and he struggled to pull it out, falling out of his chair as he attempted to retrieve the message.

  “Son of a BITCH,” huffed Dan as he slammed his hand on the table.

  “What’s up dude?” Asked
Troy curiously glancing over his buddy’s shoulder.

  Dan, visibly agitated, stood up and seemed to sober slightly as he fumbled with the phone to dial a number.

  “FUCK! I got to make a call, hang on.” Dan waved off Troy as he paced the room.

  I looked at Alex puzzled, who shrugged and took another swig of his beer.

  “Ma! It’s me... listen, I will work this out ok. Don’t worry about anything... Ma... no... Ma… I bought it first... That sack of shit… Sorry Ma, I didn’t mean to swear. Just leave it to me Ma, I got it under control.” Dan circled the room, his agitation growing as the conversation progressed. “Ma, listen I got to go. I will handle this. Don’t you worry about anything. Love you.”

  “Dude? What the Fuck?” Troy asked genuinely concerned for his friend.

  “Fucking Joey Tippton!” exclaimed Dan as he tossed his phone to Troy.

  Troy exploded into laughter as he examined Dan’s phone, passing it across to Jason.

  “Who’s Joey Tippton?” I asked, wondering who could invoke such a strong reaction in Dan.

  “He’s Dan’s nemesis.” Troy managed to blurt out in between hysterics.

  “Dan has a nemesis?” I questioned further, not understand what that had to do with Dan’s mother who had clearly been the one on the other end of the phone.

  “Don’t even start with that shit Troy. You know that fucking Tippton is a cock-sucker and he’s pushed it too fucking far this time. Get your keys, we’re driving to Yonkers.”

  “Dan you guys can’t drive, you’ve all been drinking!” Hannah exclaimed, just as confused as I was.

  “Will someone please tell me what’s going on?” I questioned. Troy and Jason were still laughing hysterically at Dan’s phone.

  “Joey Tippton bought his Mom the same fucking lawn jockey as I got my Ma. The sack of shit. I found it special, got her one painted in the Jets colours with Joe Nameth’s number and everything, and he went and got the same fucking one!” Dan explained indignantly.