Nocturne of Remembrance

by Shichiri Nakayama

  Name: Akiko Tsuda; DOB March 10, 1976 (35 years old)

  Upon investigating at the station, on May 21, 2011, the murder charge against the above, who was advised beforehand that one need not testify against one’s will, I obtained the following freely provided testimony.

  1. I am being questioned about the death of my husband, Shingo Tsuda, in the bathroom of our residence at about 9:00 p.m. on May 5th of this year. My family relations are just as I discussed previously (May 20, 2011). Today, I will talk about the circumstances at the time of the incident.

  2. My husband, Shingo, used to be the head of development for a firm that designs computer software. Our existence was stable then, but after the company was restructured three years ago, he remained unemployed. In the family besides me are elder daughter Miyuki and younger daughter Rinko, who are both of an age where money is needed for their continued education. I encouraged Shingo many times to find a new job, but perhaps because he was too haughty he would not readily seek work. In time he became what you might call a day trader; shut up in his room, he began to invest in the stock market. He poured in all his severance pay and provided almost nothing toward living expenses. In the beginning, he seemed to be making some profit and was in a good mood, but the “Lehman Shock” came in September of that year and burdened him with a huge amount of unrealized losses. Of his nearly eight million yen in severance pay, only 400,000 yen was left.

  3. Even without any cash reserves, Shingo would not go to the government employment agency. I begged him to at least apply for unemployment compensation, but he said that such behavior was beneath him and didn’t pay attention to my pleading. Having no other choice, I began working part-time at an accounting office in our neighborhood. Before marrying, I had worked in another accounting office, so I was able to learn the job right away. Also working at that office was an accountant named Kenichi Yoshiwaki. Thus I was performing housework on top of working part-time, but Shingo, as usual, stayed shut up in his room and continued to trade stocks. Since he didn’t have any cash reserves to buy new stock, it seems that he was looking for a good time to sell his shriveled stock holdings and was spending the rest of the time just looking at things on the Internet. He said that he was a white-collar worker and therefore not suited for jobs where he had to move around and sweat. Whenever he came out of his room, I would tell him to get another job, so naturally he stopped coming out. I think that in the past three years he went outside the house only two or three times. I’d been able to get a part-time job, but we still had a mortgage and with my income alone it was really difficult to manage the budget. We burnt through our savings and were in a really difficult situation. I tore through the ads in the newspaper every morning to see where I could buy food at even a yen less. I now think that paying such minute attention to those things drove me to the wall.

  4. Shingo’s daily existence became one where he only came out of his room to eat or take a bath. If he said anything, it was that his stocks would see a reversal and hit the maximum allowable single-day gain or some such nonsense, so no one in the family took notice of him anymore. As a result he began to eat at a different time than the rest of us. His lack of exercise must have taken a toll; before, he had been slim, but now he became unsightly overweight with a pot belly. In the meantime, Mr. Yoshiwaki at the office was very nice to me, and we went out to eat together a number of times. He was the same age as my husband, but with a good reputation as an accountant, he was someone that had a promising future. I gathered from little things that he said and did that he cared for me. Before long, I began to imagine myself separating from Shingo and getting together with Mr. Yoshiwaki. Some time passed like that, and one day Shingo and I had an argument over how the head of a household is supposed to behave, during which I inadvertently said that there was a man close to me who was a wonderful person though they were both the same age. I had yet to have any deep relationship with Mr. Yoshiwaki, but when Shingo heard that, he became enraged and hit and kicked me. He said with a menacing look that while he was suffering every day here I was cheating on him. But even so, he didn’t forbid me from going to my part-time job because he knew that if I didn’t, he wouldn’t get his three regular meals a day. After that incident, I began to distance myself from him even more.

  5. On May 5th, Shingo came to the living room to have dinner as always. It was already nearing nine o’clock, and both of the girls were in their own rooms. I had some pressing things to do at work and was late coming home, so I had bought some frozen food on the way. Shingo complained about that, for starters. He said that I had not only kept him waiting but was also trying to make do with frozen food. I became angry in turn. Even though I was exhausted from working all day, I also did the housework, and wouldn’t take that from some aged NEET. I was tired and must have been irritated. We immediately began to quarrel, and Shingo threw a dish from the table at me and punched me pretty hard in the face. I was no match for him strength-wise so the quarrel just ended there, but I just detested him terribly. I wouldn’t have to suffer if that man disappeared, if not for him I could live with Mr. Yoshiwaki—my hatred deepened when I thought that, and in the end I came to believe that the only way out was to kill him. Shingo went to take a bath right after dinner. I followed him. I apparently had a retractable knife in my hand, but I did not realize it at the time. I must have taken it unconsciously from the toolbox in the cabinet. In the bathroom, Shingo was humming some song, which also angered me. When I said that I wanted to reconcile with him and wash his back, he didn’t suspect anything and invited me in. I told him to turn around, and he defenselessly showed me his back and sat down. Then I stabbed him in the neck with the knife. Probably because the blade was sharp, it pierced his neck easily, and I stabbed him about three times. Blood flew out like a fountain. I had taken off my clothes and got a lot of his blood on my body, but it washed off easily in the shower.

  6. After killing Shingo, I fretted. I couldn’t go live with Mr. Yoshiwaki if I got arrested for murder. In any case, I had to do something with the corpse that lay before my eyes. When I went to look in the girls’ rooms to see if they’d noticed, they both appeared to be sound asleep, so I thought that I had to do something with the body that night. What came to mind was just taking it somewhere and dumping it. The blood had stopped oozing from the wounds, but I thought that if it started again the crime would come to light. I got from the shed the blue tarp we’d bought before for outdoor use, spread it on the floor of the dressing area next to the bath, put Shingo’s body on top of it, and began to wash away the blood that had dirtied the bath area. Blood had squirted almost to the ceiling, and cleaning it took a long time.

  7. While I was cleaning up, my father-in-law who lives nearby visited, but I didn’t notice his arrival at first because of the shower noise as I cleaned the bathroom. All of a sudden, I sensed someone’s presence in the dressing area, and my father-in-law opened the bathroom door and entered. I caught a glimpse of Shingo’s body through the open door, and realized then that everything was already up. My father-in-law’s face was ghastly pale as he looked alternately at me and at Shingo’s body, but after confirming with me that I had killed his son, he immediately reported it to the police. I just sat in the living room until the police arrived.

  8. I certainly killed Shingo. However, as I just explained to you, I flared up because he hit me, and I had in no way been planning to kill him. I think all women would have done the same thing if they were in my position. Perhaps this might sound callous, but Shingo was the entire cause of the murder. Of course, I regret killing him and am sorry for him, but I think that I’m the victim here, too.

  The above transcript was read aloud to and reviewed by the subject who, finding no errors, affixed a signature and thumbprint.

  Lieutenant Yasuo Kamiyama, Judicial Police, Setagaya Police Station (stamp)

  The impression that reading this imparted to Mikoshiba was still Akiko’s selfishness. While she testified to the fact that the victim, her h
usband, had been heinous, her own lack of affection and delusionary absorption with the future were so conspicuous that it was hard to feel compassion. If the deposition were published in the local news section of a daily, very possibly it would elicit more antipathy than sympathy from the majority of housewives.

  There were as many women with down-and-out husbands as there were stars in the heavens. The same probably went for women who’d had fists raised against them in a quarrel. And devouring newspaper ads to save even a little money on food was something that most housewives did anyway. As for wishing to escape to someplace other than here, didn’t the vast majority of people?

  Yet everybody put up with such things. With all their discontent and grumbling, and amidst agonized sighs, they went on living today as they did yesterday. From the viewpoint of such people, Akiko would invariably seem short-circuited.

  It wasn’t clear whether it was the prosecution’s wiliness or Lieutenant Kamiyama’s intent, but the deposition was constructed so that the reader got an uncomfortable feeling about Akiko even though she was giving voice to her own misfortune. An example of that was placing her self-excusing remark at the end. It seemed like the facts were being laid out cool-headedly, but Akiko’s words had been rearranged out of order to minimize any room for sympathy and to leave a bad impression.

  There was another factor that couldn’t be overlooked: Akiko’s physical appearance. Her looks were only mediocre, maybe a bit below average, a woman visibly ground down by everyday life—

  The world cast an almost cruelly severe eye upon such defendants. The retributive urge came into play far more than for an immoral but good-looking woman committing the same crime. Moreover, women showed that tendency more than men. At Akiko’s first trial, there had been two men and four women on the jury, and it couldn’t be denied that the ratio had worked against her.

  In any case, her testimony fully admitted to the crime. In that sense, there was nothing the defense could try. The knife used as the murder weapon had been found indeed, left in a corner of the bathroom, and the only fingerprints detected were those of Akiko. Moreover, according to the investigators who had rushed to the scene and taken Akiko into custody, her face had borne no signs of an attack. In other words, contrary to her testimony, they held that it wasn’t violent treatment by the victim that had led her to commit the crime.

  Mikoshiba reached out to the second deposition. It was the testimony of the victim’s father, who had discovered the dead body.

  Deposition

  Current residence: X-X-X Taishido, Setagaya Ward, Tokyo

  Occupation: District Welfare Officer

  Name: Yozo Tsuda; DOB March 25, 1941 (70 years old)

  At the Setagaya Station on May 22, 2011, the above-listed person freely provided the following testimony.

  1. I serve as a welfare officer in the Taishido district. Prior to that, I was an elementary school teacher, but I retired five years ago and have since been working as a welfare officer. My wife has already passed away, and my only blood relations are my sons, Shingo and Takahiro, who both managed to start their own families, such as they were. I am currently living with my second son and his family and am enjoying a fairly carefree life. Shingo’s house was purchased. He prospered at his former company and was able to get a mortgage when he was thirty or so. Conveniently, there was a real find in our neighborhood, “close enough that soup wouldn’t get cold” as Shingo put it to me, so I helped with the down payment. Still, I always thought that my son wasn’t so much sharp-eyed as prone to jump on the bandwagon. I became sure of this when I saw him not make any decent effort to find another job after his company took a turn for the worse. When the head of the household does not work, the family’s daily existence changes drastically to the extent that you can see it from the outside. Just watching the family aroused my pity, and although I thought I was being meddlesome, I frequently dropped by to see how they were doing. I particularly felt sorry for my two granddaughters. Even though their father was in the house all day after Akiko went to work, he didn’t even make any decent conversation with them. Even young children can recognize a strained relationship between their parents. Their home, which should be a place of repose, had become one of tension and hatred. But even in the middle of that mess, as I observed her, Akiko was a very accomplished daughter-in-law. She worked not only her share, but also that of my son, who had closed himself off in his room. On top of that, she diligently fulfilled her role as a mother. I thought that she was too good for Shingo.

  2. On May 5th, I received a call from Shingo’s next-door neighbor. I mean the Saito residence, which I had asked to let me know if there were any loud fights or something irregular. The idea was to mediate any quarrels, but in the worst case, I was ready to take the girls back to my house for a night. When I arrived and rang the doorbell, no one answered. The lights seemed to be on and the door was unlocked, so I entered. Calling out to Shingo and Akiko and walking through the hall, I came to the door of the dressing area, which was open in my direction, and there I discovered Shingo’s dead body. He was spread out in the nude on a blue tarp. I was speechless. From the bathroom on the other side I could hear the shower running. For a moment, I suspected that there had been a robbery, and my hand reflexively pushed open the door. There I found Akiko doggedly washing off the blood on the walls. She seemed greatly shocked to see me but immediately resigned herself, dropped what she was doing, and asked me to call the police.

  3. When I saw the wretched state of the bathroom, I thought that what I had been afraid of had occurred in the worst form possible. Shingo must have been the cause, but there was no need to kill him. His nude form was pitiful, but I knew that like on the detective dramas on TV absolutely nothing at the crime scene should be touched until the police arrived, so I calmed down Akiko, and the two of us waited together.

  4. I have described the circumstances of my discovery of the dead body to police personnel, and there is no mistake in the above. If there is anything else you need from me in the future, I will certainly cooperate.

  (Signature and thumbprint) Yozo Shingo

  The above transcript was read aloud to and reviewed by the subject who, finding no errors, affixed a signature and thumbprint.

  Sergeant Masaya Takagi, Judicial Police, Setagaya Police Station (stamp)

  Mikoshiba went back over the trial records. They were as expected. He could not find any trace of his predecessor calling Yozo Tsuda to the witness stand. Horai must have assumed that the trial would revolve around the fact of guilt at first and only made perfunctory preparations for getting the sentence reduced. What a waste—here was a witness sympathetic to the accused who had gone unused.

  Of course, even if he had been summoned, with Horai handling the defense it might not have amounted to much. How do you cajole two men and four women into seeing things your way? Rhetoric that could turn black to white, with the help of some staging, couldn’t be expected from someone so mealy-mouthed and shallow.

  Yozo definitely merited an interview. Sticking that requirement into the drawer of his memories, Mikoshiba reached for the third testimony.

  Deposition

  Current residence: Grande Maison #1225, X-X-X, Akatsutsumi, Setagaya Ward, Tokyo

  Occupation: Certified Public Accountant

  Name: Kenichi Yoshiwaki; DOB July 10, 1971 (39 years old)

  At the Setagaya Station on May 22, 2011, the above-listed person freely provided the following testimony.

  1. I have been employed as a CPA at the Midorikawa Accounting Firm since April 2006. I am a colleague of Akiko Tsuda. Today I will explain my relationship with Ms. Tsuda.

  2. Because accounting firms perform accounting and tax-related work, for which they employ CPAs like myself and licensed tax accountants, it’s considered a workplace where highly expert knowledge is needed. Actually, however, there are many routine tasks that do not require such expertise. Our work may involve financial matters, but there aren’t that many specialists in cor
porate finance, so we end up preparing financial charts and tax forms based on business accounting and sometimes even keep the books for our clients.

  Take tax forms: before they can be prepared the receipts must be categorized, but anyone who knows the basics can handle that. Ms. Tsuda joined the firm two years ago as a part-time clerk, and most of the work allotted to her was of that routine variety. She had been at another accounting firm prior to her marriage, so for that kind of work she only needed some occasional advice.

  3. Including our boss Mr. Midorikawa, there are three CPAs at the Midorikawa Accounting Firm, but preparing tax forms primarily fell on me. There was a lot of routine work involved, so as a matter of course I often teamed up with Ms. Tsuda. During tax-return season, the volume of cases skyrockets and we sometimes work well into the night. Even though she was a part-timer, there were days that Ms. Tsuda’s work extended past 6 p.m., so as a way to thank her for her hard work, I treated her a number of times. However, our relationship was only that of coworkers, and I harbored no special sentiments toward her. To begin with, I cohabit with my girlfriend and plan to make it official in the near future. Given the situation, the idea of cheating on the side with a coworker who meant very little to me is absurd.

  4. Indeed, when I first heard the story from a detective, I was perplexed. Not even once did I send such signals to Ms. Tsuda. Conversely, I don’t recall her ever troubling me with any of her own. To be frank, my impression of her was merely that of “a hard-working mother,” and I simply would not consider her in a romantic way. If by chance Ms. Tsuda did construe my behavior towards her in such a manner, it was a complete misunderstanding on her part.

  5. There is no mistake in the foregoing explanation of my relationship with Ms. Akiko Tsuda. If there is anything else you need from me in the future, I will certainly cooperate.