The Bargain

by Desiree Holt

  She refused to look up at him. “I-I’ve been having dreams. About you.”

  “Dreams?” He tried to keep his voice even wondering if she, too…

  “Yes. Erotic dreams.” She turned her head away. “About you and me.”

  Cole took a deep breath, reaching for control. Was this possible? Had they both been having the same dreams, night after night? God, how many times had he fucked her in his mind? Tasted of her essence, taken her into his mouth?

  “I shouldn’t have told you,” she said when he didn’t speak.

  “No. I mean, yes, you should.” He rolled to the side, taking her with him. He brushed her hair back from her face. “You definitely should have told me, because the same thing has been happening to me. I’ve been having my own dreams.”

  Her eyes flew open, and she looked straight at him, an erotic thrill racing through him. “It has? You did? About us?”

  “Yes.” He smiled. “Almost every night since we made this stupid bargain.”

  “Why didn’t you ever say anything?” she asked.

  He brushed his lips across hers, their mouths touching as he spoke. “Why didn’t you?”

  But he knew the answers to both questions, and the knowledge brought him a fresh wave of self-loathing. Deliberately, he banished those thoughts. Tonight was a new beginning, and he wasn’t going to drag the past into it.

  “Tell me what you dreamed about,” he urged. “About us. Don’t be embarrassed,” he said when a dark blush colored her skin again. “I want you to be able to say anything to me.”

  “I don’t know if I can.” She caught her bottom lip in her teeth.

  “Did I do this?” One hand kneaded her breast gently, thumb rasping over the nipple.

  “Yes,” she whispered.

  “And this?” He took the nipple into his mouth, raking his teeth over it and pressing it hard against the roof of his mouth. Her body tensed beneath him, and she arched up into his mouth.

  “Yes,” she murmured again, her voice thickening.

  “And this?” He moved down her body to run his tongue through her curls then trace the length of her slit.

  “Yes, yes, yes.” She moaned and twisted beneath him.

  “Then I must have done this.”

  He lifted her legs over his shoulders, spread the lips of her pussy wide and thrust his tongue inside. She bucked as his sucked and licked, fucking her with his tongue then moving to lap her clit. Then thrusting inside her again. She locked her legs behind his neck to pull him closer and thrust herself up at him. He felt the tiny quivers begin in her pussy and increased the tempo of his tongue. When her orgasm broke through her, he held her in place, his thumbs keeping her labia apart as he lapped at the convulsing flesh.

  When the last aftershock died away, he lowered her legs, massaging the thigh muscles, and shifted so he could kiss her, pressing her own taste into her mouth.

  “How did you know that’s what I dreamt?” she asked, her voice still shaky.

  He nipped at her earlobe. “Because I dreamt the same things.” He traced her lips with the tip of his tongue. “But I also dreamt about this.”

  Positioning himself, he entered her with one swift stroke, pausing only to give her time to adjust to him. This time there was no foreplay, no drawing things out. It was quick and fast and just as cataclysmic. At last, they collapsed, spent, hearts thudding, breath rasping, a fine sheen of perspiration coating their bodies. The heady aroma of musk mingle with Tara’s perfume and his aftershave , filling the room with the carnal scent of sex.

  “We may not live to see Christmas at this rate,” Cole joked, then he tightened his arms around her. “It’s a wonder we haven’t killed each other tonight with all that pent-up sexual energy.” With his mouth against hers, he whispered, “I love you.”

  “I love you, too,” she echoed, so glad to be able to say it aloud. With great effort, he lifted his wrist to look at his watch.

  Tara turned her head to check the time with him. “I think we missed our dinner reservation,” she told him, and they both burst out laughing.

  “No big deal. But I do think this calls for some champagne, although I’m not sure I have the strength to get up and get it.”

  “Not to worry. I think I can crawl to the bottle.” She managed to wriggle out from beneath him to sit up and reach for her gown, but he stopped her.

  “The blinds are closed. Don’t put that on. I want to watch you naked.”

  She turned a deep pink, and Cole laughed again.

  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone blush all over before.” He caught her hand. “You’re beautiful naked, Tara. Don’t cover yourself, okay? I want to look at you and be able to touch you whenever I want to.”

  She nibbled on her bottom lip again then nodded. “All right. Then we’ll drink champagne in the nude.” Her eyes dropped to his penis, still large and heavy even at rest.

  As if he could read her mind, he said, “Yes, you took it all. Every bit.”

  She blushed again.

  “I’ll get the champagne,” he told her. “Stay right where you are. I feel renewed energy.”

  He brought back the bottle, filled the champagne flutes, handed one to her then raised his glass and touched hers.

  “To us?” he asked.

  “Oh, yes. To us. No matter what. Right?”

  “No matter what.”

  They clinked their glasses and drank.

  “Since we missed dinner, we can always raid the freezer,” she told him. “Are you hungry?”

  “Not right now.” Unbelievably, he was hardening again. “Not for food, anyway.”

  He reached for her and lowered her back to the pillows. Stretching her out beside him, he let his eyes roam lazily over her body. He was sure he would never tire of looking at her, touching her, discovering her secrets. With Tara, sex was a journey of discovery and a blending of their souls.

  “I love you so much,” she said.

  “No more than I love you.”

  “Don’t you think it’s strange that we’ve both had such…erotic dreams about each other?” she asked.

  “I think someone was trying to send us a message. And I think that’s why everything tonight has been so explosive. It’s been building all this time.”

  He clasped both of her hands in one of his and stretched them above her head. She looked up at him, totally helpless, and her eyes told him just how much she was turned on by it. He caressed her slowly, tracing the lines of her body.

  “Oh, God, Cole,” she protested. “I don’t think I can.”

  “Sure you can. Just relax, and let me do all the work.” Then he put his mouth close to her ear and whispered, “I love you. You’re mine, Tara. You always will be.” And that was all it took for the heat to begin rising in his body again.

  * * * *

  Exhaustion finally claimed them. Tara pulled the afghan off the couch to cover them with. Cole got up twice during the night to stoke the fire then spooned next to her, pulling her tight against him. His semisoft cock nudged against the crevice of her buttocks. For the first time in a long time, she felt content.

  She was dozing when he stirred beside her, kissed the sensitive spot behind her ear and flipped her onto her stomach. She tensed at the position.

  “I won’t hurt you,” he promised in his low, husky voice, stroking her back, then running the tip of his tongue along her spine.

  He pulled her hips back to him, sliding one of the pillows beneath her, then slipping his hand between her legs to find her hot, open sheath and swollen clit. Murmuring erotic words and phrases to her, he rubbed her clit and massaged the lips of her pussy until she thought she would lose her mind. Jolts of heat speared through her, and throbbing need engulfed her body. At the exact moment she thought she’d screamed if he didn’t take her, he lifted her hips higher and entered her with a hard thrust, penetrating more deeply than he ever had before.

  This time she climaxed in seconds, violently, pressing back against him
as she tried to absorb his entire shaft. Only when she felt the hot gush of liquid from him did she take one last breath and finally collapse on the pillows.

  They never actually slept. They would doze then waken and begin to make love again. He introduced her to things she’d never known before, things that assaulted her body with such sensations she couldn’t stand it.

  He taught her how to pleasure him, to bring him to the peak of arousal. She took him in her mouth and teased him until he wanted to explode, the softness of her tongue stroking his hard, velvety penis. His groan of pleasure vibrated through his body. She tasted the soft-as-satin tip, sucking at the moisture already there, swallowing it with evident pleasure. His sac felt heavy in her hand, and she discovered that by lightly running the tips of her nails over it she could torment him even more. His erection would jerk in her mouth, sending shafts of excitement through her.

  Touching him in so many ways made Tara’s heart expand. She couldn’t get enough of him. Even when they lay panting, spent, still she was drawn by the need to touch him everywhere. She wanted to learn all the secret, sensitive places of his body, as he had done to her. They were intoxicated with each other. Each time they thought they were beyond arousal, a touch, a tease and they would be in heat again.

  For Tara, it was an awakening, and she reveled in it. For Cole, it was an unbelievable experience. Nothing he had ever done before prepared him for the wonder of loving her.

  * * * *

  By the time morning arrived, they could hardly move. They were sore from lovemaking and stiff from sleeping on the floor, but it was a good kind of pain. Neither would have exchanged it.

  “Now is when I can use the bath salts Lindsey sent me,” Tara said, stretching like a cat.

  “Bath salts?”

  “Yes.” Tara laughed. “She sent me what I can only describe as a full-blown seduction kit.” She described it for him.

  Cole chuckled. “You should have seen Sean running me around from store to store. I’m sure he thought I was in such bad shape I couldn’t make a purchase by myself.”

  “By the way.” She sat up and looked at him. “I think everyone was pretty slick the way they worked it all out yesterday. I mean, Jake just showing up to get Molly and take her to the ranch overnight. Lindsey with her gift basket.”

  “Sean insisted on taking me shopping so I’d be properly dressed.” He grinned at her. “Not that either of us kept our clothes on very long.”

  “They were all determined to make this happen.” She wrapped her arms around his chest. “I think we’re lucky to have the friends and family we do.”

  “I guess we should call them and tell them you haven’t thrown me back out on the street.”

  “In a minute.” She leaned on one elbow and gently traced the line of his jaw. “I love you more than I ever thought it possible to love someone. You make my heart full just being with you. I want you to keep that in mind because we still have something important to resolve. I want to talk about it right now before we start our day.”

  He grinned, a playful look in his eyes. “Are you going to tell me you have me at your mercy, stark naked, so I can’t say no?”

  “If I need to.” She studied his face, looking for some signs that he’d actually hear what she had to say. Was this new beginning too fragile for her to bring it up now? She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. It was now or never, she thought. And maybe discussing it naked would make it a lot easier. “Cole, this is serious. It’s really a big deal to me. We didn’t resolve anything last night.” She stopped and took a deep breath. Please let me say the right words. “It’s about Molly.”

  She felt his body tense and saw the protective mask drop into place. He started to roll away from her, but she stopped him, leaning over and raining gentle kisses on his face.

  “Don’t do that,” she pleaded. “Don’t close up on me this way. Listen to me. Please. We have to come to some resolution—at least a compromise—or how can we ever build a life together?”

  He was silent for so long that she wasn’t sure he would ever answer her. Finally, in a flat voice, he said, “All right. I’m listening.

  She kept her hand on his cheek, connecting with him while she talked. “I understand what you feel when you look at her, but what happened isn’t her fault. You’re the only father she’s got. Can you understand that? She’s getting to the point where she’ll start wondering why you treat her as if she’s got the plague. Molly didn’t do this to you.”

  “Tara, I…”

  She touched her fingers to his lips and shook her head. “No. Last night, you asked me to be quiet and listen to you. Now, I’m asking you to do the same. Molly is a wonderful little child, a treasure. We said today is the first day of the rest of our lives. Can’t we find a way to make her part of it, too? It’s so important to me.”

  “You’re asking a lot of me,” he told her, his voice tight. “I look at her, and I see Maggie’s face and hear her voice. I hear those bitter words. I’ve tried so many times to make it right again, and it just hasn’t worked.”

  Again she searched for the right words. “There’s something I probably should have told you before, but the terms of our ‘bargain’ made it irrelevant.” She bit her lip. “I was sure it wouldn’t matter so I just kept it to myself.”

  “What is it, Tara?” Suddenly, he was the voice of concern, shifting so he could reach out his hand and touch her. “What didn’t you think you needed to tell me? Are you sick? Is it something we can take care of?”

  She shook her head then dropped her gaze. “Not sick. No.” Her sigh was heavy enough to split the thick silence. “After my miscarriage, when Mike was killed, the doctors told me I’d probably never conceive another child.” She raised her eyes to look at him again. “Molly may be the only one we’ll ever share. That’s why this is so important to me. I want us to be a family, and we can’t if you still shut yourself away from her.”

  He pulled her into his arms, holding her against his body. “I am so sorry. No wonder you think I’m such a heartless ass. I would do anything in the world to make you happy, sweetheart, but here you may be asking the impossible.”

  Tara snuggled against him, taking strength from his warmth. “Will you try something for me?”

  Although he kept his arms wrapped around her, his body stiffened. “What is it you want, Tara?”

  “In a little while, we’re going to the ranch to pick up Molly. I want it to be okay that she’ll be with us. Can you at least give me that?” She paused. “You know she’s growing all the time. Pretty soon, I won’t be able to hide her away every minute you’re home. And I don’t want you to stay away because of it.”

  Again, he was silent for so long she began to get nervous. Would it all come unraveled now? Was she asking him to take an impossible leap? No. It was past time for that excuse.

  Finally, reaching out his fingers to wipe away the tears she hadn’t even realized were trickling down her cheeks, he said in a ragged voice, “All right. For you. I will do the best I can.” He pulled her close again, nestling her head against his shoulder. “I want to please you, but you have to know this is killing me.”

  “I know. I really do.” A tiny thread of hope surged through her.

  “I held that child every day for two weeks when she was born,” he told her, his eyes now staring at a point beyond her. “I rocked her in my arms and felt her tiny heart beating against mine. She was my child, my flesh. Then, in seconds, I found out what a cruel joke it all was.” His face twisted in pain, remembering.

  “You need to find a way to free yourself from this hate, or it will destroy you,” she said softly. “And I don’t intend to let that happen.”

  “I promise I’ll try, and that’s all I can offer. Is that good enough?”

  “That’s all I ask.” She gave him a quick kiss. “I love you, and I’ll do whatever I can to make it easier for you. This is a new beginning for all of us. Including Molly.”

  “All right.�
�� He hugged her then grinned. “You may have to give me regular treatments to keep me in line, though.” He slapped his forehead. “I forgot the rest of the stuff.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Come with me, and I’ll show you.” He tugged her along behind him to the kitchen where he’d left his packages the night before. “I think these were bribes, in case nothing else worked.”

  He pulled each box from the shopping bag, watching as she opened each box. The first one held a nightgown, frilly and sheer and made for seduction. The next box contained a soft cashmere sweater with a draped collar and neckline that dipped to a vee, in a golden color that caught the highlights in her hair. She gasped in pleasure and held it against her body, relishing its luxurious feel. It was so different from her other sweaters, all chosen strictly for their utilitarian design and serviceability.

  When Cole took out the last package, he stopped to give her a kiss filled with both desire and promise. Then he handed it to her. “This is my heart,” he said solemnly. “I give it to you willingly with all my love.”

  Tara gasped when she opened the jeweler’s box. Inside were tiny gold earrings in the shape of hearts, outlined in pearls and diamonds. She had tears in her eyes when she lifted them out. “I will always keep your heart safe,” she said, her voice husky, and stood on tiptoe to kiss him.

  “And now I’m going to shower,” he said. “Why don’t you take that bath you want. Then we’ll call the ranch.”

  “All right.”

  The soothing bath did much for her sore and aching body. She leaned back and let the scented foaming water drift over her as images of the night just past kept floating at the edge of her consciousness. Her body began to tingle just from the memories, and she lay there for a long while with a smile on her face.

  Dried and sprayed with her favorite perfume, she dressed in her new sweater and a pair of tight, chocolate, suede jeans she’d bought in a moment of frivolous impulse. They clung to her hips and accentuated her legs. The outfit was so different from her usual dull, functional wardrobe. She smiled as she put on the heart earrings and brushed her hair out until it fell in thick, shimmering waves.