D, My Name Is Danita

by Norma Fox Mazer

“Laredo, how sexist.” But I couldn’t help smiling. “She’s smart, she’s got talent, she’s got everything.”

  “So do you,” Laredo said, sounding just like she always used to, loyal and warm and loving.

  I’d had all this strong stuff to say to her, and suddenly I didn’t care. I only wanted things to be the way they used to be. “Why can’t our fight just be over with?” I said.

  “That’s all right with me,” Laredo said.

  “It is?”

  “Yes!”

  We smiled at each other.

  “You saw me that day in Strawberries, didn’t you?” I said.

  “Yeah, I did.”

  “I knew it. I followed you—”

  “I didn’t see you.”

  “Well, this guy bumped into me—no, wait a second, I don’t want to tell you that yet. If we’re made up, we should hug and make it official first.” So we did. And I suddenly felt really happy.

  We got to the top of the hill and sat down under the trees. You could see the school and half the city spread out below. “Well, will you tell me why it happened?” I asked.

  “Do I have to talk about it?”

  “You don’t have to, Laredo, but I wish you would. You really hurt me when you told me we should forget being friends. What was that, a whim or something?”

  “Dan-i! No. It was … I don’t know! I don’t understand myself. It happened because I was in a foul, ugly mood, and … I let it happen.” She slumped over. “Let me tell you one thing, though, it wasn’t a whim.”

  “What was it?”

  “Despair,” she said, with a crooked smile. “I could tell you the whole deal, but it’s all bla bla bla bla and the same old stuff. My father.”

  “I thought so! What’d he do now?”

  “No Thanksgiving trip.” She gave me that crooked smile again. “He called me that morning, said Thanksgiving wasn’t going to be a convenient time for him after all.… I guess I went a little bananas. I knew I was taking my feelings out on you, but somehow I just … didn’t care.”

  “This isn’t the first time it happened, Laredo.”

  “I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “I wouldn’t blame you if you gave up on me. Do you hate me?”

  “No. And I’m never going to give up on you. You don’t give up on people you love. Only, tell me one thing. If I hadn’t come over to you in the gym today, would it have been Strawberries all over again? You running away from me, saying nothing?”

  She shook her head. “I was going to talk to you. I was!… It was a miserable week without you, Dani.” She took my thumb and matched it up against hers. “I knew we couldn’t be broken up forever. You knew it, too, didn’t you?”

  I nodded. “I knew it.”

  Chapter 11

  “This is going to be the first time my little brother has ever actually seen me,” Laredo said. We entered the mall by one of the side entrances. It was Saturday morning. “I’m just a name to him. I mean, I hope I’m a name to him. I don’t even know if I’m that much. I don’t know what my father has told him about me. Does Jasper even know he has a sister?”

  “He will, once he gets the video,” I said.

  Laredo hugged my arm. “This is such a brilliant idea! I don’t know how you came up with it.”

  We got on the escalator to ground level. “Laredo, all I did was say you should send your little brother a video of you.”

  “I know! That’s what I said. It was brilliant, Dani.”

  I smiled modestly. Right near You Can Be a Star, Too, there was a full-length mirror. Laredo slowed down to look herself over, and I peered over her shoulder. I’d fixed my hair in a new style that morning, pulling it all to one side, very slick and smooth. I thought it made me look older.

  The front of You Can Be a Star, Too was just a tiny room with a counter, a video monitor, and three straight chairs. There was a door in the far wall. A woman in a silver dress came through the door, and Laredo told her what she wanted to do.

  “You want to talk? Just talk? You don’t want to sing?” the woman said. “Everybody wants to sing or play an instrument.”

  “I want to send a message.”

  The woman shrugged. “Your choice.” She pushed open the door. “Let’s go back here into the studio.”

  I started to go with them, but Laredo said, “No, Dani, you can wait for me.” I sat down. I didn’t mind. I knew exactly what Laredo was going to say. I had heard her practice at least half a dozen times this morning.

  Hi, Jasper! This is your sister, Laredo. I think it’s neat that I have a little brother. I want to get to know you. I’m planning to call you up soon and talk to you. I hope you’ll tell me all about yourself. What kind of games do you like to play? Some things I like to do are play science games and go to movies and spend time with my best friend. Her name is Danita …

  A boy came out from the back and went behind the counter. “Well, hi,” he said.

  I stared. It was Red Sneakers, the boy with the ponytail and the bare ankles. “Didn’t you bump into me the other day?” I blurted.

  He leaned over the counter. “Yeah … it was you, wasn’t it? I guess I did. Sorry about that; I’m not usually so clumsy.” He had a nice smile. “What are you doing here?”

  “Waiting for my friend. What about you?”

  “I work here. Are you going to make a video, too, Dani?”

  “How’d you know my name?”

  “I, uh, heard your friend talking to you.”

  “Oh.” Had he been listening to us?

  “I’m D.T. Goodman,” he said.

  “I’m Dani Merritt.”

  “I know!”

  “You didn’t know my last name.”

  “Well …” He gave me a cute grin. “I’m from California. Maybe that makes me intuitive.… I’ve only been out here three weeks, but I’ve done okay. I’ve got a room at the Y and I’ve got this job.”

  “Where do you come from in California?”

  “Bakersfield. Did you ever hear of it? Marilyn Monroe lived there once. Claim to fame! It’s totally different there. Dry. Hot. I like it here okay. The trees are fabulous, man! Winter’s coming. I’m looking forward to that. I ski. Some people don’t know we ski in California. You have to go up into the mountains. California has everything!”

  I had the stupid idea that he was telling me this stuff because I had changed my hairstyle. I wanted to ask him how old he thought I was, but I lost my nerve and just said, “Don’t you go to school?”

  “I should be in my second year of college. I took a leave to come here. That was my main desire—to come east—but I probably will eventually go back to college.”

  “What for? I mean, what will you study?”

  “Marine biology. I’m attracted to that.”

  I tried to think of something intelligent to say. I had to settle for, “How old are you?”

  “Nineteen. How old are you, Dani?”

  “Almost fourteen.”

  He peered at me. “That’s what I thought.”

  “Oh.” I was disappointed. Maybe I’d have to change my hairdo again.

  “My mom comes from around here,” he said. “Menands, little burg south of this town.”

  “Menands? My father grew up there, too. My grandparents lived there until they moved to Florida.”

  “I got my start in life there,” he said.

  “You were born there, too?”

  “No, not that.… You know what I mean.”

  Did I? Sort of. I didn’t want to act dumb, though, so I nodded as if I understood perfectly.

  “So what kind of guy is your father?” he said. “I mean, coming from a small town, and all …”

  The way he jumped around from one thing to another! “My girlfriend says he’s a ten as a dad. How about yours?”

  “My stepfather? An okay guy, but the relationship is not too profound. So you like your father?”

  “Yes, of course. But—”

  “But what?”

&nb
sp; “Oh, nothing.”

  He leaned across the counter. My face got warm. He was looking at me so intently.

  “Well … he hovers too much. Worries about me, if I’m going to get sick, stuff like that. I was a preemie, but that was years ago.”

  “My mother worries about me, too,” he said. “She thinks I’m impulsive. I tried to tell her dropping out of college wasn’t an impulse. I thought about it before I did it. But one thing that’s excellent about my mother, she believes in independence. She trusts me.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that. It was like a reproach to me. Did my parents trust me? I was glad that Laredo and the woman in the silver dress came through the door just then.

  “She was very good,” the woman said, going behind the counter and making out a bill.

  Laredo took out her wallet. “I did it in just two takes, Dani.” She smiled at D.T., then looked at me with her eyebrows raised, like Wooo! Cute!

  “Don’t you remember him?” I said when we left. “I’m sure he’s the one who gave you the big stare that day we came over here to see Jon.”

  “Really?”

  “But the funny thing is, I keep bumping into him. I think I even saw him on my street.”

  “Maybe he lives there.”

  “No, he’s living in the Y.”

  “How do you know that?”

  We crossed the parking lot to the post office on Kinney Road so Laredo could mail the cassette out to her brother right away. “He told me,” I said.

  “Well, he’s quite adorable. Who cares where he lives?”

  Chapter 12

  “Dani, I got a job,” Laredo said the moment she sat down in the lunchroom. “I told them I was sixteen. And wait till you hear where I’m working. You won’t guess in a million years. Ice Dreams.”

  I almost choked on my apple. “The same place Jon works?”

  “Yes. I am in such a good mood, Dani! I’m going to make so much money. More than I ever did baby-sitting. I’ll never have to buy my clothes on sale again.”

  “But, Laredo, didn’t they want to see your working papers?”

  “I told the manager I’d bring them in next week. I figure he’ll forget by then. What does he care how old I am, as long as I do my job? I’ll be a good worker.”

  I won’t lie, I felt envious of Laredo’s independence and guts. I would never have the nerve and confidence to talk my way into a job like that.

  “You know something else that’s great about this job, Dani? I can put in a word for you with Jon. It’s a perfect opportunity. I could be just casual about it and—”

  “No, no, no! I don’t want you to do that, Laredo. Don’t say anything about me to Jon.”

  “Why? If I did, it would only be good.”

  “No, don’t even mention my name! I think he and Shirley are going together. She’s wearing a ring on a chain around her neck! I’m sure it means they’re steady now.”

  “Ohhhh.” Laredo said it as if she felt every bit as bad as I did. “I’m sorry, Dani.”

  After school, we walked over to the mall. I should say, we hustled over. Laredo barely had enough time to get to work. I sat down at one of the little tables with the red-and-blue Cinzano umbrellas and opened my notebook. I could see Laredo—and Jon—perfectly from where I was. Maybe he’d look around … his eyes would meet my eyes.… And suddenly, he’d know Shirley was a terrible mistake. He’d walk toward me … and he’d be saying my name … Dani … Dani …

  I made myself open my history book and concentrate on American gunboats in China a century ago. People passed. I didn’t look up. Someone pulled out the chair across from me. I kept reading. Then a hand fell across my book. “Hi there, Dani.”

  It was D.T. Goodman. He put down a sandwich wrapped in paper. “My supper,” he said. “Mind if I eat it here?” He turned a chair around and sat down with his arms across the back. “Do you live in this mall, or what?”

  I blushed. “My girlfriend has a job here. I’m just keeping her company. In a manner of speaking.”

  “I get it. That’s nice,” he said. “Where does she work?” I pointed to Ice Dreams, and he looked over. “She’s the cute one with the blonde hair?”

  “No, that’s Jon! A boy.”

  D.T. grinned. Oh! He was teasing me. I blushed harder.

  He took a swallow from a carton of milk and then a bite of his sandwich. “I’d offer you some of this, but I figure you have supper waiting at home.”

  Was that a question?

  “Dani, do you know what are the two most important things in life?”

  I thought, Sure I do! Love and … But then I couldn’t think what the second thing was.

  “You want to know the answer? Luck and jokes.”

  “Not love?”

  “Well … that’s important. But it’s not enough. Your whole life is actually about luck. Good luck. Bad luck. I’ve had some good luck, some bad luck. Jokes are important to help you keep your balance when you find out about the bad luck.”

  “I never thought of it that way.”

  “Now you’ll never forget.”

  He was easy to be with, but where had he come from—and I didn’t mean Bakersfield, California. He seemed to have just walked into my life and started talking to me like I was an old friend. Was this the way people were in California—casual, friendly, relaxed?

  “Dani, do you have brothers and sisters?”

  “One sister, Lizbeth. She’s younger than me.”

  “I have two sisters,” he said. “Both of them younger.” He threw back his head and laughed.

  “Did you just think of a good joke?”

  “Right! You might appreciate it.” I smiled expectantly, but he didn’t tell it to me. Instead, he asked, “How old is Lizbeth?”

  “Eight.”

  “What’s she like? Lizbeth’s a cute name. Not short for Elizabeth? Do you two get along? Or is she the proverbial little sister?”

  “You ask a lot of questions.” I smiled to show I didn’t really mind. “She’s smart, she’s crazy about horses.”

  “Here’s another question for you. Do you think names have anything to do with character? One of my theories of life is that a jerky name means being a jerk. A great name means being a great person. Look at your name. Dani. A boy’s name; that’s got to influence your life.”

  “My name is Danita; that’s not a boy’s name. It’s a feminine form of Daniel. I’m named for my father.”

  “Guess what, so am I. Daniel Thomas.”

  “Your father’s name is Daniel, too?”

  “Isn’t that a chuckle? Thomas is for one of my grandfathers. What’s your middle name?”

  “Ann, after my great-grandmother.”

  “Which one? Your mother’s grandmother or your father’s grandmother? There I go again, asking questions.”

  “My mother’s grandmother,” I said.

  He stretched out his legs, nodding. “I have a lot of curiosity. I like to know about people. Maybe I should be a journalist instead of a marine biologist. What do you think?”

  “You’d be good at it.” I stood up and gathered my books. All at once I wanted to get away from him. Maybe it was all the questions, maybe that intense way he had of watching me, then abruptly laughing. Whatever, I was suddenly uncomfortable.

  I waved to Laredo and pointed at my watch. “I have to go now,” I said to D.T., and I walked quickly away.

  “Good-bye, Danita Dani,” he called after me. “See you soon, I hope!”

  Chapter 13

  “Laredo? Hi, it’s about time. I thought you’d never answer the phone.”

  “Dani, talk fast! I don’t have much time. Mom’ll be home from work in an hour. I’ve got to have all my homework done by then.”

  “Why?”

  “She doesn’t know I’m working, and—”

  “Laredo, what does she think you’re doing every night when you’re not home?”

  “It’s not every night. It’s three nights and she’s work
ing two of those nights and I get home before her, so that’s no problem. As long as I get everything done. Monday night when she’s home and I’m working, I’m going to tell her I’m at your house.”

  “What if she calls up, Laredo? What if my father answers? Or my mother? They’ll tell her you’re not here, and they’ll tell her where you are.”

  “They know I’m working?”

  “Yes.”

  “You told them?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why did you do that?”

  “I didn’t do it, Laredo. I just happened to mention it.”

  “I wish you didn’t blab everything to your parents, Dani.”

  “If you didn’t want me to say anything, you should have told me. Are we having a fight?”

  “I hope not.”

  “Me, too. I’m sorry I told them, Laredo. I’m sorry because it upsets you. But I don’t like you saying blab to me. I don’t blab to people. I don’t blab to my parents.”

  “I know, I know, I know! I’m sorry, too. I’m just tired and I’m not thinking about what I’m saying.”

  “Maybe you’re working too much and not sleeping enough. My father says kids our age need a lot of sleep.”

  “Dani, do you notice you’re always quoting your father?”

  “I am not.”

  “You do it all the time. He’s your final authority on everything.”

  “If he happens to be right—”

  “How do you know he’s right?”

  “It makes sense to me. We’re growing, our bodies are changing—”

  “Making money makes sense to me.”

  “—and we shouldn’t stress them out. When did you get home?”

  “About two minutes before you called, Dani. They don’t close until nine. Then I have to wait for the bus.”

  “Did you eat supper there?”

  “Pizza and ice cream again. I hope I don’t get fat. I got paid tonight. I love making money! As long as I can keep up my schoolwork.… If I’m not on the honor roll, my mother will have a fit.… Dani, Jon is a funny guy.”

  “Funny how? Ha ha?”

  “No, not that. He never makes a joke. He’s quiet. He’s actually kind of sweet, but I don’t know what I think of him yet.… Who was the guy I saw you talking to?”