The Christmas Wish

by Maggie Marr

  “You can’t let the stupid thing that one Emerson brother said be the reason why you aren’t with Tyler.”

  “I’m not. It isn’t. I mean…” This was her own self-confidence issue, her own problem. The belief that she wasn’t pretty enough, good enough, whatever enough. That was that haunted her mind. “I just keep thinking of what happened with Marco and—”

  “Have you told Tyler about that?”

  Brinn’s eyes widened in horror. A flicker of fear passed through her. She shook her head.

  “Don’t you think he deserves to know whatever ghosts you have? Your fears, your questions?”

  He did deserve to know, and while Brinn was more likely than her sister or her mother to share her feelings, she didn’t want to tell Tyler about the humiliation of discovering her fiancé with another woman. A woman that Brinn had welcomed into their business and thought was her friend.

  “It might not matter now.” Brinn ran her hand over her face. “I’m so embarrassed about how I left. I’m not sure I can ever face his family again.”

  “That isn’t your fault, and I am certain Carol will string Kent up by his balls when she finds out what he said. He’s a Neanderthal. Everyone knows it. You can’t let one bad apple ruin the entire bunch. You know that, right?”

  She did. But she also knew that if she wanted to continue in a relationship with Tyler, she had to get a grip on these fears. How could she ever feel like she was enough?

  An hour later, Brinn had finished her coffee and her tears. Alison offered to let her stay the night, but Brinn had to be up early. She needed to check on the Christmas castle; she needed to be sure that the structure wouldn’t come crashing down at the unveiling the next day. The snow had stopped, and Brinn got into her SUV for the drive back to her house and her cold and lonely bed.

  *

  “Why did Brinn leave without saying good-bye?”

  Tyler’s heart ached with Charlotte’s question. She was tucked into her bottom bunk. Ashley and Grace were already drifting to dreamland in the two top bunks. He’d texted and called, but he hadn’t gotten a response.

  “Sweetheart. I’m sure there is a really good reason.” He hoped there was a really good reason. Had he said something? Done something? What would make Brinn dash out from his family’s weekly dinner without so much as a backward glance? She’d roared down the driveway as though there was an emergency.

  Charlotte didn’t need to be abandoned by another woman, especially just as she was becoming attached to Brinn. He didn’t need to be abandoned either. “She’ll call soon and let me know why. Don’t worry about it, bug. Okay?” Tyler knelt beside her bed and pulled the soft pink quilt up higher beneath her chin.

  “Tomorrow I’m going to write my letter to Santa Claus.” Charlotte’s eyes sparkled with delight. He loved how she could go from sadness to joy so quickly. Thank God for the resilience of children. “Grandma is going to help me with the big words.”

  “And what are you going to ask Santa for?” He’d finished most of his shopping for Charlotte, but he wanted to be certain he’d covered the big ask, the one thing that she felt she needed to ask Santa for.

  “I already told you Daddy.” Charlotte’s face was very solemn. “I want Mommy to come home for Christmas.”

  Tyler couldn’t breathe. His heart punched upward in his chest and choked him. What to say to his little girl’s request? He wished he could give her what she wanted. Even if he would never be with Charlize, he’d love for Charlotte to get to spend the day with her mom.

  “Oh, sweetheart, I don’t think that Santa—”

  “Santa is magic, Daddy.” Charlotte’s eyes sparkled. “Santa can do anything.”

  “Santa is magic, but sweetheart, Mommy has all kinds of plans for Christmas and Christmas Eve and I don’t think—”

  “Santa will get her here, Daddy. I know he will.”

  Tyler closed his eyes for a moment. How to explain? What to say? “Sweetheart, you understand that I love you and Mommy loves you and we always will, but Mommy and I can’t be together anymore. You know that right?”

  “Yes, Daddy. I won’t ask Santa to make you and Mommy live together again. I just want her here for Christmas.”

  “Oh, sweetheart.” Tyler clasped his arms around her and pressed his lips to her forehead. God, he loved this child. He would forever live with the guilt of failing her, of destroying their family with his work habits and inability to grow the love that he and his wife had once shared. He pulled Charlotte closer. What was he thinking? A year and a half was too soon to bring another woman around Charlotte. And at Christmas? One of the most family-oriented times of the year? Now was not the time to be involved. He had a huge work project, he had a daughter.

  His heart warmed with Brinn in his mind. He didn’t feel chipped away or worn down when they were together. A warm blanket of joy and security and love and passion surrounded him when he was with Brinn. A deep and abiding passion for her and her body that was different, that wouldn’t fade. He turned to Charlotte and her face had already deepened into the darkness of sleep. He kissed her once more on her forehead. He checked his two nieces and walked out the bedroom door and pulled it shut.

  Chuck and Breck and Kent were still downstairs. He heard them in the kitchen. He rounded the corner and made his way down the long hall. When he entered all talking stopped and his brothers and his sister-in-law stared at him.

  “What?” Tyler reached for a fresh coffee cup. “I can tell you’re all talking about me, so let’s just ignore the subterfuge and you guys lay it out on the line.” His chest tightened. The pain of Charlotte’s Christmas wish was heavy in his chest as well as how conflicted his feelings were for Brinn.

  “This dipshit chased off your date.” Chuck hooked his thumb toward Kent, who stood on the other side of the kitchen island with his hands shoved in his pockets.

  “I have a right to my opinions.” Kent stood with his feet far apart, a defensive stance, but his face appeared sheepish and embarrassed.

  “We all have the right to our opinions, dumb ass, but that doesn’t mean you have to voice them.”

  Tyler stepped toward the island. “What did you say?” He held tight to his voice when really he wanted to grab his little brother in a headlock and bust his nose against the top of the kitchen island.

  “I may have compared Charlize to Brinn.” Kent closed his eyes and pursed his lips. “And I may have used the words Maserati and beat-up Volkswagen.”

  Tyler’s jaw dropped open. Rage filled him and he took a step back from his brother. If he remained close to Kent, he’d definitely be smashing his face into the marble. “How are we even related? Are you fucking kidding me?” His control ran thin. “I invited her to our family dinner and you say some shit like that?”

  Kent’s spine straightened. “Hey, bro, truth is truth.”

  Tyler lunged for Kent and grabbed him by the sweater. “You fuckhead, I’m in love with her. Do you understand what you just did? You think she’ll ever want to be a part of this family now? Ever want to step foot in this house? Ever want to look at your sorry-assed mug again?”

  Chuck grasped Tyler’s arms and pulled him back from Kent. His chest heaved up and down and he yanked his arms free of his brother’s grasp.

  “What’s going on in here?” Roger stood just inside the back door.

  “This asshole called my girlfriend a beat-up Volkswagen and my ex-wife a Maserati, and she heard him. That’s why Brinn ran out of here so fast.”

  “Oh, Kent.” Carol walked from the pantry and her fingers covered her mouth. “How could you? Brinn Bartoli is the kindest woman I’ve ever met. And she’s beautiful. How can you not see that she is absolutely beautiful?”

  Kent shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, Mom. I was talking about the outside. I just…” He looked away. The anger evaporated from Kent and he looked at Tyler. “I’m sorry. It was a really bonehead move. I shouldn’t have said it.”

  “Damn right, you shouldn�
��t have said it.” Tyler’s voice was calmer but still contained an edge.

  “Daddy?” Tyler turned toward the kitchen doorway that led to the hall. “Is everything okay?” Charlotte stood there holding her blankie and rubbing her eyes. Tyler wanted to go to Brinn, to run to her, to tell her what an idiot his little brother was and apologize, but right this very minute he had to get Charlotte back to bed. “Hey, bug. Everything is fine. We were just talking.” He walked to Charlotte and scooped her up into his arms. “Are Ashley and Grace awake too?”

  Charlotte shook her head no, and Tyler shot Kent a quick look over his shoulder. He’d deal with him later. Right now he had to get Charlotte to bed and find a way to salvage his relationship with Brinn.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Brinn put on her most comfortable flannel pajamas and climbed into her bed. A very cold, very empty, and very big bed. In the weeks that she’d been seeing Tyler, she’d grown used to his body next to hers, his arms around her as she fell asleep. Tonight, her heart hurt and her body ached. She’d cried buckets of tears and her face was puffy and she was tired. Tomorrow she needed to be at the Grande early, and there was the unveiling, and then somehow she needed to explain to Ma that she had been right when she’d said Brinn wasn’t enough for Tyler Emerson.

  She’d just pulled the quilt to her chin when the doorbell rang. She didn’t want to answer the door. Maybe it was Tyler trying to sort out why she’d run off. The bell rang again and then there were hard knocks on the front door.

  “I’m not leaving until you answer, and it’s cold out here. Starting to snow.”

  Her heart ached. She didn’t want to talk to Tyler, she didn’t have the energy. She’d ignored his calls and texts. Space and time to sort out her feelings was what she needed.

  “Please, Brinn.”

  Brinn threw back her covers and padded through the house. She pulled open the front door.

  Her heart kathwacked against her ribs. One look into his sad eyes and she knew. Damn, she knew. She absolutely loved Tyler Emerson.

  “Brinn, Kent is an idiot.” The words flew from his mouth and then his lips were on hers. His arms grasped her. The warmth of him, the scent of him, the overwhelming need for Tyler combusted into a flame.

  Tears streamed down her face as his lips devoured hers. He walked them back into the house and kicked the door closed with his foot. His face was cold upon hers, his hands pulled at her flannel shirt, and his fingertips quickly warmed as they pressed to her skin.

  “Oh, Brinn, Brinn, Brinn.” He peppered her face with kisses. Her nose, her eyelids, her cheeks. She could only cling to Tyler, hoping deep in her heart that he knew what she’d heard and that he didn’t agree with what Kent had said. He pulled off his coat without taking his lips from hers. His tongue slid along the seam of her lips, and her mouth opened to his. Their tongues tangled. He lifted her into his arms and they were moving through the house, then he set her down in front of her bed and stripped her shirt from her body. His hands were on her breasts

  “You are beautiful. Your beauty takes my breath away.” He ducked his head and his lips found her tight bud of a nipple, and he slipped it into his mouth.

  Her sex clutched and she was wet for him, wanting him inside her, wanting him to take all of her. His lips slid across her chest to her other breast, and his hand slid to the waist of her flannel pajamas. He pressed the bottoms down over her hips and reached around and cupped her ass to pull her closer. His cock pressed against her hip through his jeans.

  “I want you, Brinn.”

  She pulled at his shirt. Her fingers needed to feel his skin. He ripped the shirt over his head, as she unbuttoned his jeans. He was out of his boots and jeans in an instant, and she stood before him naked while his eyes roamed over her.

  “You’re gorgeous. Your body—oh my God, Brinn, I love every inch of your body.” His eyes locked with her eyes. “Your body is perfect.”

  He stepped to her and his lips trailed down her body until his mouth was just above her sex.

  “You’re wet for me, baby, so wet.” He pressed her back to the bed and knelt on the floor before her. He slid each of her legs over his shoulders and his tongue slipped up the side of her folds. “So hot, baby, so wet, so beautiful.” His finger slid into her and pulsed in and out while his tongue slid through her sex. “This is what I want; you’re what I want.”

  She lay back and arched forward into his mouth. God, this was what she wanted. Tyler with his mouth on her. He slid a second finger into her and she tightened. His lips clasped her nub, which was swollen with desire. He pulled hard on her, his lips and his tongue circling her engorged clit.

  A sound flew from her mouth. A deep gasp and high-pitched desire. A growl came from Tyler. A deep-throated, possessive need. Her hands clutched the comforter on her bed and her back bowed. She was so close. His tongue circled her clit again, and her head pressed back into the mattress. How could she think he didn’t want her?

  He pulled his mouth from her. “How can I show you? How can I prove to you that you’re mine now? That every inch of you is mine and that I love every single bit of you.” While he spoke, his fingers continued to glide in and out of her. His words were gone and his mouth was back on her wet pussy, sucking her and pulling her. She was so close. Every muscle in her body tightened. The lights shattered behind her lids and his name was on her lips as she dropped over the edge into an ocean of pleasure.

  “Tyler, oh my God, Tyler, I’m going to come!”

  His tongue circled faster and he sucked harder. Gasps of air. She clawed the bed, taking in every last shred of pleasure with the orgasm Tyler provided.

  *

  She was heavy-lidded on the bed. He pulled his mouth away from her sex and kissed up her thigh. His cock was hard. He wanted to plunge into her. His balls hot with come, he could barely stand to be above her, looking at that gorgeous body. Her black hair was wild and curly and surrounded her face, her breasts taut and perfect, a flush from the pleasure he’d just provided her all over her body. He pressed his finger to her nub and bent over her.

  “I am going to make you know that I want you. That I love you, that I desire you and think you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. After tonight, you will have no doubts.” He took his finger from her sex and licked it, then trailed it up over her body. He plucked her nipple and her back bowed again. Damn, he needed to be in her. To plunge his cock deep inside the warmth of her body. He bent over her and kissed her lips. Those plump and swollen lips. The head of his cock nudged her folds. Her entrance was wet and swollen and ready for him. He inched into her, her eyes heavy with pleasure and her breathing raspy. He would take her over the edge again and again tonight. He would leave no doubt in her mind that his desire for her was deep and possibly unending.

  Her sex clenched around him and he slid in slowly. He held himself above her with one arm and his other hand slid down her belly and found her slick clit. His fingertip pressed against it.

  “Oh, Tyler,”

  He could barely hold back. God, his balls were ready to explode, and yet her pleasure was all he wanted. The pleasure on her face. He needed her to know that her pleasure was what he wanted.

  “Oh God, yes, please I want you inside me. Please, Tyler.”

  He pressed forward, his fingers still massaging her clit. Her hips arched up. He was nearing the edge of his restraint. He glanced down at the union of his cock and her pussy, the spot where they met. Her body clenched around him and he could wait no more. He pressed deep into her, and her legs wrapped around him. She pulled him deep into her, then her body arched and moved.

  “Oh my God, I’m going to come again. Tyler, again.”

  With her word, he slammed into her body, thrusting forward and pulling back, his arms around her torso. His lips pressed to hers. She clung to him. Her body shuddered and her muscles grasped him. His balls pulled up and come shot through him, hard and fast, a deep heat that burst from him and into Brinn. A long, hard sound rose
from his chest and flew from his lips. “Brinn, oh my God, Brinn. Brinn.”

  Her body tightened around him and he collapsed on top of her, trying to gather his breath, trying to gather himself. Never had he felt such an intense orgasm. Never had he felt so close to a woman, so wanted, so encapsulated. He finally lifted himself from her and his lips found her nose and each of her eyelids.

  “I love you, Brinn Bartoli, do you understand? I love every inch of you. Your body.” He looked down at her exquisite body that gave him so much pleasure. “Your body is perfect.”

  Her gaze slid from him. Tears formed in her eyes. How could she cry after what they’d just experienced together? Didn’t she know that he was telling her the truth, that he wanted her? That he wanted only her.

  “I…” She looked at him. “I was so scared. I was scared that you didn’t really… that you weren’t… that I’m not…”

  “Brinn, you can’t manufacture this. I want you. I only want you. I love every inch of you.” What could he do to make her believe in the love he felt for her? Make her be certain that she was what he desired? No one else. He couldn’t explain his feelings with words, but damned if he wouldn’t like to spend the rest of his life trying. She filled something in him with her smile, her laughter, her joy, and her caring. “Please forgive me for my idiot brother. Please.”

  A small smile curved over her face. “Did you say that you loved me?”

  Tyler nodded and smiled.

  “You know, I love you too.”

  Tyler’s heart nearly burst from his chest. He rolled back and pulled Brinn on top of him. “Really? Why don’t you spend the rest of tonight showing me how much?”