Breaking The Mold
Page 14
“I’m sorry,” she whispered and pulled her hand back to dab her eyes.
Instant apologizing is something that I see or hear from subs on occasion. When a sub starts to apologize often, they are not remorseful for something, they’re afraid. By apologizing quickly, they’re trying to prevent a reaction. My heart went out to this woman because I feared the heaviness of Paul was beginning to take its toll on her. She wasn’t even aware of it.
“You have nothing to apologize for, Amy.”
I leaned back in my chair hoping she would realize that I was done scrutinizing her hands and that she could relax.
“I gather that happened just this past week?”
She nodded. I wasn’t going to dig into if it was punishment or play. The bigger picture here was clearly how he was controlling her ability to work.
“I imagine that it’s been difficult to work on your books. Typing must be uncomfortable.”
“Yes. The typing motion pulls at the welts. But, it’s okay. I am taking a break from writing.”
I nodded and took a deep breath.
“Your choice, or his?”
Just as I expected, she smiled and said that both of them discussed it and decided that her taking some time off was best. Six months of living under his roof already had her apologizing for no reason and for defending his decisions. It also had her career on hold and a passion shelved.
“Are you learning a lot from him?”
“Oh, yes, absolutely.”
“And you guys take the time to discuss things?”
This time she wasn’t so eager to favorably answer my questions, but she did nod quickly.
“I’m really just concentrating on his needs right now,” she replied.
“You have needs too. And if he isn’t seeing them or tending to them as best as he can, then it’s your responsibility to talk to him. Maybe during the next time, you guys can discuss things,” I suggested.
“No, it’s okay, really. I’m fine. I just am trying to figure out how to be everything he needs.”
As I looked into her eyes, I could see her brave heart. She was trying so hard, and she didn’t even know that Paul’s first choice would always be Anthony. His words and thoughts have already taken over this woman.
“Amy, remember, don’t lose yourself in his needs.”
“I’m not.”
“You are an author with a beautiful, creative mind. You have lots of fans that can’t wait to read your stories. Writing is important to you.”
She shook her head at me.
“No, not right now it’s not important to me. Making sure everything is in order for when he comes home is important. Meeting his needs is important.”
Today must have been my day to stare at people in surprise because that’s what I was doing when Paul’s voice carried over to us.
“Hi, princess.”
Amy practically jumped out of her seat and apologized for nothing again. I had a strong suspicion that this was normal for them as of late.
“Sorry, hi, Sir. I just finished my class and was hydrating.”
“Good, princess. See you later, Blake,” Paul said as he turned to leave with Amy.
My mind had been blown today by a number of things…and all of them had to do with Paul in one facet or another.
Chapter Sixteen
August 2012
Amy
“It’s so good to hear from you, Aims! Did J.P. finally let you out of the cage?” Samantha’s light-hearted voice beamed in my ear.
Even though J.P. was at work, and I knew that this was an appropriate time to talk to Samantha, I was going to keep my eye on the clock. I laughed off Samantha’s first joke about J.P. letting me out of the cage, and then her second jab about needing to schedule phone calls through J.P. Of course, she didn’t have to, and J.P. had never said that he wanted to know when I was calling someone, but the jokes were already a bit much.
“Okay, very funny. Now if you’re done poking fun of my Master—”
I froze at the slip-up and shut my eyes hoping that Samantha wasn’t paying close attention and hadn’t heard me call J.P. my Master. Her reaction wasn’t what I expected; laughter.
“Oh shit, Aims, that was a good one. I even thought it was good how you stopped in mid-sentence after dropping the ‘Master-bomb.’ You almost had me there. You’d be a terrible slave for him.”
Her words cut through me like a dull knife, making sure to do the damage on the way in and out. I touched the simple chain that J.P. put around my neck at the beginning of the month to signify our relationship. Tears formed behind my eyelids and finally spilled over when I heard her laugh again. Only when I’m sure it was obvious that I was crying did she stop laughing and the jokes.
“Amy? Amy Andrews did you enter into a Master/slave dynamic with J.P.?” she asked with a panicked sounding voice.
I took a deep, steadying breath and told her that we were in fact in a Master/slave relationship. Samantha’s reaction was to yell my name into my ear.
“Amy! Do you even know what the hell you’re doing?”
I was getting tired of being treated as if I had no clue what it meant. I gazed down at the scars on my palms from J.P.’s cane.
“I think I have a clue what I’m doing and I really don’t appreciate the way you’re treating me.”
“Amy, I’m sorry. I just…oh my God, you just completely caught me off guard with that news. I’m assuming he collared you.”
“Yes,” I said sounding congested from crying.
“What does the collar look like?”
I shrugged and ran my fingers along the chain. It was the thinnest chain I had ever seen when he presented it to me. J.P. got it at a hardware store, but he was so excited when he gave it to me. I explained it to Samantha and detected that she felt sorry for me.
“How did he approach you with it?”
“We’ve talked about it a few times over the past couple of months. He had seemed so distracted, and I kept trying to figure out how to help or asked what I could do. He kept saying everything was fine but I could tell it wasn’t. I think it’s stress. He had been playfully calling me his little slave, which led to us talking about it—”
“Oh, whew. That’s good to hear Amy. I’m glad you guys have talked about that kind of relationship. So, do you like it?”
I nodded and tried to make the words come out, but I was failing. I finally was able to summons some words.
“I do. It’s been different and has taken some time getting used to putting my mind in that way of thinking, but I’m learning. Why did you say I’d be a terrible slave?” I asked as I organized my notebook on the desk.
“I’m sorry, Aims. It was a bad joke, and I shouldn’t have said it.”
“Yeah, but you must have some thoughts on that.”
“I shouldn’t have said it.” Samantha paused for a moment before continuing. “Your personality just has never seemed ‘slave-like.’ You have a smart mouth, and I can see that not being good for a slave.”
I stared at the scars on my palm again; yep, smart mouth indeed.
“Are things better now that you’re in this dynamic?” she asked, pulling my attention away from my palms.
“Yes, but like I said, I think he’s under stress. He’s been spending more and more time on the computer at night studying for a recertification he needs.” When Samantha didn’t say anything, I was quick to speak up and confirm that things are fine. “Things will return to normal after he gets his recertification.”
“When is that?”
When was that? That was a good question and one that I didn’t know the answer to.
“It’s coming up soon,” I replied.
“So, forgive my asking, but I’m so curious as to what has changed with your relationship since becoming his slave.”
What was different? Everything. I reached out and slid my finger along the notebook that I used to write ideas in. It hasn’t been opened in months.
“Well,
the state of the house is my responsibility; cooking and cleaning type of tasks.”
“I kind of assumed that. And actually, many people are ‘slaves’ in their own households but never give a second thought to it. So, what about the sex? How has that changed?”
“I’m enjoying it even more than I thought I would. It’s on his schedule, meaning that he decides when and how we have it.”
“But you still have your safe word, right?”
“Of course.”
“And he still practices after care with you, especially with the heavy-handed stuff?”
For the most part, J.P. did, but there were also times where he almost seemed cold and resentful during and after. Sometimes he would push me away from him immediately afterward or tell me to go take a shower, and when I’d come back to the room, he’d be asleep or back on the computer studying. But then there were times where he was as passionate and loving as when we first started to visit one another.
“He’s very good with the after care, Sam.” I glanced at the clock; I had been on the phone for over thirty minutes. “Sam, I need to get going—”
“Wait! Your new book, we haven’t even begun talking about it.”
“I know. I need some more time off.”
“Aims, you haven’t released anything or even given hints to your readers about an upcoming release since Dark Spell.”
“Great observation,” I said sarcastically. “I need more time.”
“Are you even working on anything, or are the ideas not coming?”
I was tired of the inquisition. The ideas were there, tucked safely inside my mind. It was just a matter of writing them.
“I have ideas, don’t worry. I’m just occupied with other things right now. Now, I need to get off the phone.”
“Wait—when will I hear from you again?”
“Email me whenever you want, and I’ll try to call next week. Bye, Samantha.”
I quickly hung up with her and leaned back in the chair at my writing desk. My yellow notebook sat staring at me. I pulled it closer and flipped open to a blank page and picked up the pen. Without gripping it too tightly, I began to write. At first, my hand ached as my ideas scrawled across the pages. Everything was coming so easily to me and all of the ideas I’ve developed during house work over the past month came tumbling out. I hadn’t written like this in many months and was having a great time until I glanced at the clock.
“Shit!”
I’ve been writing for more than half the day! Nothing around the house had been done yet. I hurried to begin handling the tasks that were assigned to me for the day and was close to being done when J.P. called.
“Hi, princess, how has your day been?”
“Good, Master. I hope yours has been good too.”
“Just fine, Amy. I’m calling to let you know that I’m going to be late this evening. I found out about a study group that is meeting tonight. They’re supposed to have a special study guide for the re-cert exam, and I’d like to attend. Will you see to it that you are fed and taken care of this evening?”
“Yes, I can do that,” I said as I thought back to my notebook that was waiting for me.
“Wonderful, princess. I will be home by 11:00 p.m. and then we’ll fuck.”
“Will you tie me up tonight?” I eagerly asked.
J.P.’s quiet laugh made me smile and reminded me of one of the things I love about him. That laugh of his did things to me.
“Yes, princess. I think I should be in the mood to tie you up tonight. After you eat dinner, I want you to play with yourself in the bathtub. Finger yourself, pinch those nipples, but do not come. Understand?”
“Yes, Master.”
After we got off the phone, I finished up my chores, ate dinner, wrote for almost two hours and then sat in the tub to carry out my last task, which was the most enjoyable.
Chapter Seventeen
August 2012
J.P.
I needed a scene badly. A good, heavy scene. While I was on my break, I logged into Kinky Links and looked at some sexy images. Today must be my lucky day because there were several that were making me hard. There were three new images by a few Doms that showcased their subs/slaves tied up in a combination of rope or chains.
The chains got me going. Not only was the sub in chains, but it was a male sub. There was a blindfold around his eyes, and he had a ball gag in his mouth. The chains were pulled tight across his chest; I could tell with the way his skin was depressed.
This picture turned me on like crazy right now, and I actually jacked off in the men’s room to it before going back to work. All through my shift, it was such a struggle to keep my mind focused on anything but the picture of the man in chains.
I needed a scene like that; to bind and beat.
I thought about going to Irons…without Amy. Today was Masochist Monday at Irons, so there is an excellent chance that there are some lovelies who needed what I need to give. I called Amy during my last break and came up with a story about a study group for my recertification exam.
“Hi, princess, how has your day been?” I asked.
“Good, Master. I hope yours has been good too,” she said eagerly.
“Just fine, Amy. I’m calling to let you know that I’m going to be late this evening. I found out about a study group that is meeting tonight. They’re supposed to have a special study guide for the re-cert exam, and I’d like to attend. Will you see to it that you are fed and taken care of this evening?”
“Yes, I can do that,” she said.
I noticed that she didn’t sound too disappointed that I’d be a little late. I took that as a good sign.
“Wonderful, princess. I will be home by 11:00 p.m. and then we’ll fuck.”
I knew damn well that I wasn’t going to fuck anyone at Irons tonight. Fucking is reserved for Amy. I also was quite certain that I would be in need of a hard fucking after binding and beating on someone tonight. By the time I get home, I should be able to fuck Amy roughly enough to satisfy my needs without tearing her to pieces.
“Will you tie me up tonight?” Amy asked.
“Yes, princess. I think I should be in the mood to tie you up tonight. After you eat dinner, I want you to play with yourself in the bathtub. Finger yourself, pinch those nipples, but do not come. Understand?” I instructed.
“Yes, Master.”
“See you tonight, princess.”
I figured that giving her a task to toy with herself would keep her happy while I was at Irons and she’ll be prepped and primed for an orgasm when I get home. As soon as 7:00 rolled around, I practically ran to my car so I could get to Irons in time to negotiate a scene with one of the seasoned masochists before they were all taken.
“Fucking hell,” I swore under my breath as I pulled into the parking lot and noticed that not only was Everett’s expensive special edition BMW parked in the front, but so was Graves’.
God help me if I even come close to Graves tonight. I repeated a line from one of my favorite songs that always reminded me to maintain control. “If I keep self-control, I’ll be safe in my soul.”
After I checked in, I walked with purpose over to the negotiation area where all of the unattached subs hung out each evening. I scanned my options as I approached and when I saw Bracken, I grew more excited. Bracken wasn’t as dark as they came but she would most certainly do just fine tonight.
As I approached her, I noticed that Blake and Cathy’s boy toy, Noah, was strolling around. Jesus fucking Christ. I could use a dose of him. He was sturdy and built well and could probably walk away from a scene with me tonight. Bracken could too, but a need to play very rough was pulling me toward Noah. I stopped and rubbed a hand over my face. I’d have to clear this with Daddy Blake.
I decided to try my luck with Noah before Bracken was taken. I caught Noah’s attention and motioned for him to come over.
“Yes, sir, Master Paul?” he respectfully asked.
“Noah, if I obtain proper permission fro
m your daddy, would you be interested in a heavy scene tonight?”
He blanched and innocently looked around.
“Don’t be a pussy, Noah. I know you serve Cathy, but you’re a man. You can take it like a big boy.”
“Yes, sir. If Sir Blake wishes.”
“Good boy. Where might I find him?”
“He’s upstairs in the medical room playing with Kelsie, Master Paul.”
I nodded and bolted up the stairs. I found the medical room and the glassless window frame was open. Blake rarely closed blinds; he liked others to watch.
He had Kelsie up on the exam table, knees bent, legs spread and was giving her a rectal exam with his finger. Kelsie cooed and giggled as Dr. Blake tested her tight hole. When he was satisfied with the exam, Blake withdrew his finger and applied more lube to her puckered hole. Then he pulled his hard cock from his pants, lubed it and pushed himself into Kelsie.
“Mmm, Daddy!” Kelsie cried out.
These two were just getting started, and I wasn’t going to wait around for permission on Noah. Bracken would have to do. Returning to the main room, I could see that Bracken was still standing over there alone.
“Bracken, I’m looking for some rough play tonight. Bondage and a beating. Are you interested?”
“Yes, Master Paul,” she replied with a smile.
“Any places that I should avoid?” I asked as we headed to the dungeon.
“My face, sir.”
“Fair enough, Bracken. Your safe word is ‘red’ for tonight.”
I looked up down the stone hallway glancing for an empty stall. There were several, and when I heard fucking Everett’s voice coming from a stall, I had to look in. Colin Everett was playfully spanking a girl on the bench while the girl was sucking on Graves.
Conveniently, the cell across from them was vacant. Naturally, that was the one I selected. After Bracken was naked, I guided her into position on the floor facing the hallway. That way I could still catch what went on in the cell across from us. I might even get myself a new pic of my little muse.