Always On My Mind: A Bad Boy Rancher Love Story (The Dawson Brothers Book 1)

by Ali Parker

  "Really, or are you just saying that to be nice to your mother?" She wrapped her arms around him from behind and squeezed. "Because you liking him is important to me."

  "Good. I like him. He seems like a great guy." Marc lifted his hands to the ceiling and turned around to face his mom, pulling her into a warm hug. "He said you asked him out. A good, well-behaved Christian woman like you, asking a man out? No way. I called him a liar and punched him in the mouth."

  "You're the liar." She shrugged and pulled back. "I asked him out because he wouldn't ask me. He's wanted to for years. I have no clue what was holding him back. Seems silly to me."

  "You're a little intimidating at work, Mom. You're bossy and smart and insanely pretty."

  "You're being a turd now." She walked into the living room, and Marc followed her as his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out and stopped by the couch.

  "It's a text from Kari. She says, 'Merry Christmas to my two favorite people in the world. It's not the same down here without you guys, and yet my heart is full. There is no snow and it's barely cold, but I wanted you to know that I was thinking about you this morning. I'll call later today. I love you both, with all my heart’."

  "I miss her." His mother sat down on the couch and glanced down at her hands. "But, not as much as you do."

  "Well, she's a hoodlum, a traitor. She decided to go to Texas and spend the holiday shoveling cowshit-"

  "Marc Martin."

  "Or turds, whatever." He sat down on his mother's favorite chair. "But... the good child is here. See?"

  She laughed and shook her head. "I'm glad you're here with me, baby, but pretty soon you're going to need to set up your own house with Lisa. Christmas needs to be at your place with your traditions. Maine isn't too far. Maybe I can start coming up there."

  "No need to." He smiled. "She wants to move back to New York after the first of the year."

  "Seriously? Are you messing with me, because that is not what the good child would do to his mother on Christmas Day."

  "Nope. I'm serious. She needs to be near her mom and she wants to be with me while I finish up school."

  "You think you guys will stay here in New York after the spring?"

  He laughed. "One thing at a time, but maybe so. I'd love to take an internship at St. Mark's like Charles mentioned, but I need to think about her desires and wishes for the future too. I think taking it slow is going to be the key."

  "I couldn’t agree more." She leaned back and let out a soft chuckle. "Best Christmas wish ever."

  "Agreed."

  Chapter 18

  Lisa

  The smell of wassail woke Lisa up the next morning, the sound of Christmas music playing somewhere downstairs grabbing her next. She sat up and let out a sigh. Her mother had been asleep by the time she got home the night before, but she and her father had shared a few too many chocolate chip cookies over a long conversation.

  He had pulled out the old picture books and moved through almost every photo Lisa could remember of her childhood. The pride in his voice had shaken her to the core, but somewhere deep down inside, she was aware of how much her dad loved her. It was her mother she wanted to see it from.

  Of course, hearing it the night before for the first time since she was little was a huge breakthrough.

  She got up and pulled on her robe and slippers before walking downstairs languidly. The house would be empty seeing that everyone was granted three days off around Christmas. It was almost nice. Just her, her mother and her father.

  The music was coming from the den, which surprised her a little. Someone was playing their old grand piano. Her mother. Lisa walked down the hall and stopped outside of the room, leaning against the frame and closing her eyes. Her mother was fierce and didn't seem to have a soft side at all, but much like when she was little, Lisa could catch glimpses of it peeking around the edge of her tough persona.

  Her mom paused and glanced behind her as Lisa opened her eyes and smiled. "It's beautiful. You're still as talented as you were when I was a kid."

  "You think?" her mom responded and turned back to the piano.

  For a moment, worry rushed through the center of Lisa's chest. Nothing seemed to have changed in her mom. Had she made up the emotion from the phone call the night before? The sadness and longing?

  Hopefully not.

  She wasn't sure she could survive a blow like that. Forcing herself to move across the room, she took a seat near the piano and coached herself through how the conversation should go. Regardless of what happened, Lisa was prepared to forgive her mom for being a horrible mother and walk away a little less broken. Even if her mom didn't accept anything she said. Even if she didn't offer an apology of her own.

  No matter what. This stops here.

  "Do you still play at all?" Lisa's mother glanced over at her, the beautiful woman nothing more than a shell of who she was before. Lisa could still see her fully healthy, gorgeous and domineering.

  "I haven't tried in a long time." Lisa shrugged and clasped her hands in her lap before straightening her shoulders and trying to sit with better posture. Her mother would call her out for it like she'd done a million times before.

  "Come on over here and let's play Deck the Halls together like we used to when you were younger." Her mom scooted over and patted the seat. "Come on. I don't bite. I promise."

  "I'm going to hold you to that," Lisa mumbled and was surprised by the chuckle she got in response.

  They started to play, and Lisa fell right into rhythm with her mother. It was almost as natural as breathing. It was one of the only places in her life that her mother had never spoken harshly to her. Sitting at the piano bench. It was like the woman turned into someone else for a little while.

  They stopped and her father clapped behind them, laughing with joy. "I love it. You beautiful things are the reason I love my life."

  "Such a flirt." Her mother glanced over at her as her smile faded. "Is breakfast ready?"

  "Almost. I'll finish it up. I just heard you guys and wanted to come watch."

  She glanced over her shoulder, and Lisa prepared for the worst. Her mother was rarely a bitch to her father, but there had been a few times. Enough that Lisa was worried about his feelings.

  "I want to talk with Lisa for a few minutes and then she can help me get into the kitchen."

  "If you need me-" her father started.

  "I always need you." She smiled and turned toward Lisa, her knee brushing against Lisa's leg. "I wanted to start by telling you how proud I am of you. You decided to go against my wishes in college, and you forged your own path. I commend that."

  Lisa's mouth dropped a little, but she forced it closed and simply nodded. There was no talking when her mother was talking. House rules. Ones that she hadn't followed in a long time, but felt the need to sitting there so close to her mother.

  "My mom and dad wanted me to be a singer, a piano player, a dancer, and I started to go that route, but somewhere along the way, I let the world get ahold of me. Granny and Pops were poor, you know."

  Lisa nodded.

  "And I hated myself for not following my dreams, but practicality grabbed ahold of me." She shrugged and reached out, brushing a strand of hair behind Lisa's ear. "You remind me so much of my mother. So bold and beautiful. You would have loved her so much." She glanced down and took a breath. "She would have loved you." She looked up with tears in her eyes. "And she would have been so disappointed in me."

  "Mom." Lisa reached out and grasped her mom's hand. A simple apology would do. "You don't need to do this. Your mother is probably beyond proud of you. Look at all you've accomplished."

  "And who do I have to share it with?" Her voice broke, but she pulled herself together quickly and waved at Lisa as she started to respond again. She wasn't going to let anything stop her confession it would seem. "Let me get it out."

  Lisa squeezed her mom's frail hands and started to pull back, but the older woman clasped Lisa's hands down with h
er free one.

  "Okay," Lisa whispered, quickly getting lost in her own need to cry.

  "My mom and dad thought I was the world, and they showed me love every day. I became so dependent on that love that when they died-" She paused and glanced up at the ceiling. "When they died, I felt like dying too. If it wasn't for being pregnant with you and having your sweet father to help me through it, I'm not sure I would have made it. I should have been in that car with them. We were supposed to be riding together."

  Lisa sat in stony silence. She'd never heard this part of the story.

  "But I was in labor." Her mom glanced down, and where Lisa expected to see hate or disgust, nothing but brokenness existed. "I hated myself for a long time after that night, and I retreated inside myself to try and survive. In doing that, I became a horrible person to the only one that would have loved me unconditionally. You."

  "Mom," Lisa's voice pinched off. She had no clue, and not that her mother's words made up for the heartache and the verbal abuse over the years, but at least it had little to do with Lisa, and far more to do with her mother fighting a battle against her own demons.

  "I would take it all back if I could." She swallowed as tears rolled down her face. "And not because I'm dying now."

  "You're not dying. We're fighting this thing. Period. Don't say that," Lisa barked out as her own tears started to roll down her face.

  "All right, but I just need you to know that every shitty thing I did was in an effort to save you from loving me the way your father did, the way my parents did. I didn't want you to suffer should this day come." She glanced around and let out a soft sob. "And you won't. So when I die, and I'm going to die, Lisa. We all do, but when I do... you won't be crippled by it."

  "You're wrong, but either way, I forgive you. Daddy and I both love you. Repelling it sounds like a great idea, but it doesn't work like that." Lisa reached out and touched the side of her mother’s face. "I'm angry at you. I'm hurt by you, but I'd give anything to start a new chapter. Even this late in the game."

  "Can we do that? Please?" Her mom cupped her hand over Lisa's and closed her eyes, leaning into Lisa's touch.

  "Yeah. Now enough of this emotional stuff. Let's go give Daddy hell over his lumpy pancakes." Lisa pulled her hand back and wiped at her eyes.

  "Thank you, Lisa. I do love you so much. I've admired you from afar your whole life." Her mom reached out and pulled her into a hug.

  "Well, from what Marc tells me, the view is way better up close."

  Her mom laughed and ran her hand down the back of her head. "Good. I plan on finding out for myself."

  Epilogue

  Lisa

  One Month Later

  "You really like this open floor plan?" Lisa glanced around, not too sure that she could live in a place that looked like a glorified studio.

  "Baby. Might I remind you that I'm still in school and you're starting your business over again here in New York. We need to be smart about the price and get something that we like and can afford. The minute I get out of school and start making money, we'll move into something bigger and better." Marc moved up behind her and kissed the side of her neck. "You know I want to give you the world."

  "I don't need the world." She turned and pressed her hands to his chest. "I just want something a little more closed off. How about the last apartment we looked at?"

  "What?" His face registered the shock that must have been racing through his veins. "It was half the size of this one. Insanely tiny."

  "Yes, and it had a living room, a kitchen and a bedroom that were all separated from each other. I liked it." She shrugged and brushed her breasts across his chest, teasing him. "Besides, it wouldn't take much to break each room in, together."

  His eyes widened a little. "We will get anything you want to get if you keep doing that twisty thing you do."

  She laughed and swatted at him. "This one is too far from my folks too. I want to be right down the road. I know it was small, and a little more expensive, but it's closer, and it will do for now."

  He nodded as the lady showing the apartment walked back through the door. "Sorry for the interruption. I needed to take that call."

  "No problem." Lisa moved back from Marc. "We'll take the last place we visited. Thanks for showing us this one, but I think it's in a better location for us."

  "Oh. Really? This one is so much bigger." She glanced around with confusion on her face.

  "Yep. Really." Lisa picked up her purse and walked to the door. "We'll move in on February first. Make sure the carpets are cleaned and the window in the kitchen is properly fixed."

  "Yeah. What she said." Marc jogged up beside her and glanced over. "I love it when you get all business-y. It's hot."

  "You think I'm hot in a bathroom with no makeup and my hair in curlers. You are not a good judge for hot anymore." She slipped her arm into his as they walked down the stairs together.

  "Seeing that I will always find you hot, I think I'm the perfect judge of when you look good and when you look fucking great. Who could ask for more than positive feedback all the time?" He reached for the door on the old truck and moved back.

  "This is true. You're so slick with your words. I bet you got all the girls back in school." She laughed at the look on his handsome face and buckled up.

  He got in and buckled up also, glancing over at her. "I'd have traded all those girls back in for a few more years with you."

  "Stop being sweet or I'm going to crawl into your lap and give you a blow job." She licked at the side of her mouth as his breath caught in his chest. How he was so taken by her was a mystery. She just couldn't see what he saw, but maybe she didn't need to. He was quick to remind her that he found her beautiful, intelligent, bold. He was her confidence, and through the rebuilding of her relationship with her mother, she was finding herself again.

  "We having lunch with your mom and dad for your birthday?" Marc reached over and took her hand.

  "Yeah. Your mom and Charles are coming too." She leaned back and let out a contented sigh. "The gang is coming in tonight too. I think they're staying out at my mom's place, well, Sicily and Drake are. I guess Kari and Jake will stay with your mom."

  "Um, yeah. She wouldn't have it any other way." Marc glanced over at her. "I'm glad your mom is doing better. She's back to eating normal and all that?"

  "Yep. She's almost her old bitchy self again." Lisa smiled. "Complaining about everything under the sun."

  "Then business as per usual?"

  "Exactly." Lisa let out a relaxed sigh. "I'm so glad things changed between us during Christmas. I feel like a new woman."

  "What? I love the old one."

  "Are you calling me old?" She lifted her eyebrow and reached over to tease him a little.

  "Old? Hell no. Let's just go with new. This new girl likes to pet my crotch a lot. Let's keep her around."

  Lisa snorted, enjoying his immaturity far more than she should. He was everything to her, and would always keep her young. She hadn't changed as much, but she had let herself live and love again. It was a breath of fresh air. She was becoming the woman she had always wanted to be.

  Not one justified by lust, but completed by love.

  Up next is Judged Christmas...

  Judged Christmas

  A Holiday Novella

  Chapter 1

  Drake

  The bell jingled above the door as a couple of middle-aged men walked into the gym, their sweat suits a little tight, but everyone's were that time of year.

  "Hey, Drake. How goes it, buddy?" Tom lifted his hand and waved as Drake glanced up from the front counter.

  "Hey, guys. Enjoy your workout." He smiled as they gave each other hell about being fat, old and ugly.

  "You know they're only the second group of people to come in today." Violet walked up to the desk and pressed her elbows on it, looking like an angel. The girl was like a sister to him, as were all the girls who worked for him at the gym.

  Drake stood and rais
ed his arms toward the ceiling, stretching and hoping like hell to figure out how to stop feeling so lazy. It was due to staying up late making love to Sicily, or maybe it was her cooking.

  "Stop worrying. The first of the year is coming. People always wake up around New Year's and realize that they don't want to spend another year out of shape." He ran his hand down his chest and over his stomach, not quite happy with where he was in his own upkeep of his body. Damn beautiful baker is fucking up my hard work.

  He smiled at the thought of her and moved out of the receptionist’s area so Violet could take her place again. It was hell running on a skeleton crew at the gym, but they were making due. People were scarce during the holidays.

  "I guess you're right." Violet walked around the counter and dropped down in her seat, her red hair bouncing about as she moved. "Hey, don't forget you have an interview today."

  "Oh yeah, shit. I totally forgot." Drake rolled his eyes and turned toward the front door. "What time is it? How long do I have? Enough time to get in a quick workout before I head over to the tree farm?"

  "Tree farm?" She chuckled, and Drake turned back to face her.

  He put his hands flat on the top of the desk and smiled. "Yes, tree farm. Sicily wants a live tree at their house."

  "And you decided it was a good idea not to tell her that you're allergic to pine?"

  "Yes, mother." Drake smirked at the pretty girl. "There's no reason to upset her holiday over me having to sneeze a few times."

  "A few times?" Violet turned her head to the side.

  "More like a million times." Jasmine walked up, her dark hair in a high ponytail and green eyes full of challenge. "And let's not forget that you sneeze so loud that it could quite possibly pierce someone's eardrums."