by Emma Vikes
Kate seemed to be desperate to quench her thirst because she pushed me down on the couch. Her tongue trailed from my lips and proceeded south, following the happy trail. She quickly unbuckled my belt and pulled down my jeans, my boxers following right after. My hard cock sprang out. She was about to put her lips on my dick when I stopped her.
“Kate,” I said her name breathlessly, straining against every will power I have left. “You’re a little bit in a rush.”
When her blue eyes met mine, I saw the frustration in them. She slowly slumped down to the floor, pulling her knees to her chest and burying her head on them.
I sighed and pulled up my boxers again. Sitting down next to her, I took her in my arms. I didn’t understand why she was crying. We constantly talked over FaceTime and through texts during work, but not once did she mention she was struggling with something.
“I’m sorry. I was just—I was desperate for a distraction and when you told me I was in a rush, I felt guilty. I was using you. I’m sorry, Ryan.”
I wasn’t sure how I was meant to respond. “I’ve never been used before.”
She let out a small chuckle. “That’s because you were the one on the other end of that.”
Kate always joked about how much of a player I was but I knew deep in my heart, it worried her. “Would you care to tell me what’s wrong?”
I wasn’t sure if the depth of what we had included this kind of intimate conversation. Before Adam came into the picture, Kate and I stayed on the surface of what we had. When Andrew found out about us, I made it clear to Kate that I still wanted what we had. It might not have been a declaration of love or a confession but it seemed to have been enough.
At that time, I wasn’t even sure of the depth of my feelings for her. Now, I was certain she was the only person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. For a guy like me, not once did I imagine I would reach that point. I didn’t want to believe in love and commitment. For me, they were a myth.
Until her.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” she stated. “I haven’t told Faith about what happened. She keeps thinking that Adam likes her so much that he’s willing to spend time with her alone. But my daughter isn’t stupid, Ryan. It’s either someone tells her the truth or she figures it out herself.”
Even if Faith was only six years old, I knew Kate was right. She would probably figure it all out. I took a deep breath, rubbing her back in comfort. “You know, sometimes, you don’t have to pressure yourself to figure it all out. Sometimes, things simply begin to unravel in a way that brings clarity to your situation.”
She raised her head up and looked at me. “What do you mean?”
I swallowed. When I realized I loved her, I thought my confession would be different. I thought I could pull off a grand, romantic gesture and sweep her off of her feet. But we weren’t hopeless romantics. Leaning my head back on the couch, I let out a deep breath. “I thought I had my shit figured out, shortcake. You remember how we had this conversation about love, romance, and commitments?”
Kate still looked confused but nodded her head. “It’s the very conversation that made me doubt you.”
I smiled at her slightly and shrugged. “I was raised thinking love was a myth, Kate. My dad cheated on my mom when I was young. They tried to work out their differences for my sake but evidently, my sake wasn’t enough. I even caught him red-handed and he made me swear not to tell Mom.”
I could feel Kate’s gaze boring into mine. I knew she must’ve been confused about why I was suddenly letting my walls down, giving her a truth I’d never shared with anyone. Not even with Andrew. “What they had was a whirlwind romance and evidently, their fire burned out and I wasn’t enough to keep them together.”
Understanding flashed in Kate’s eyes as she reached for my hand and held it tight. “It must’ve been scarring.”
“Yes, enough to not believe in love and commitments. For a while, I thought every set of parents were like mine. I thought they were simply pretending to be in love until I met Lois and Bob. The first time I met them, I thought to myself, my god, how the hell did they make it work?”
“They weren’t perfect, Ryan,” Kate said quietly.
“But they made it work,” I whispered, “in the same sense that I’ve witnessed Andrew and Mila fight so many times and in the end, still choose what they had. But when you told me that maybe love was the one doing the choosing, I thought your opinion validated mine.”
She squeezed my hand gently as her shoulders tensed up. “Are you breaking up with me?”
Shaking my head quickly, I let go of one of her hands and then placed my free hand on the side of her neck. “The very person I thought validated my opinion on love became the very person who proved me wrong. What I’m trying to say, shortcake, is that I love you. I am in love with you. I never thought I would ever fall for someone and then there’s you.”
Kate could only stare at me and the seconds ticked on without her saying anything. She opened her mouth to speak.
I moved my thumb to her lips. I shook my head slowly. “Just because I said it, doesn’t mean you’re inclined to do so, shortcake. I love you. That’s just me letting you know that I do. I sincerely do.”
She didn’t say anything. Instead, she crawled to my lap, climbing on top of me, and kissing me slowly. It was slow and languid, almost as if we had all the time in the world.
I wasn’t sure what Kate’s intention was with the kiss but with the lack of clothes separating us, my dick hardened.
She giggled through the kiss.
Taking me by surprise, Kate bit my bottom lip which prompted me to open my mouth. Her tongue slid in, roaming my mouth. She grinded her hips on my crotch and through my thin cotton boxers, the sensation intensified. I could feel the pleasure coiling in the pit of my stomach as our lips molded together, heated with our bodies entangled.
Then the moment was ruined by the vibration from her phone.
I groaned. “If you brought a vibrator to make this fun, now would be the time to take it out. If it’s your phone, just ignore it.”
But the vibration was incessant and Kate crawled off of me. “I left Faith with Adam for the day because he wanted to spend some time with her. It must be him.” She pulled out her phone from her pocket.
I sighed, leaning my head on the couch.
Kate chuckled, pecking my swollen lips quickly. She read the message and her eyebrows furrowed.
I watched as her face contorted to fear and then panic.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
Kate looked as if the whole world suddenly crashed and burned on top of her. “Adam and Faith got into an accident. We need to go to the hospital now!”
24
Kate
The white walls and floors of the hospital had never been brighter. The smell of antiseptic, the sound of nurses rushing to a room, a flat line beeping out loudly, someone wailing at the loss of a loved one. It looked like chaos to a stranger but it was order to a medical professional. But I wasn’t a medical professional and although I’d walked these halls so many times, I never felt more lost.
I jumped in surprise when a hand went to the small of my back. It was Ryan and I couldn’t remember when he’d put on his white coat and stethoscope. I was too anxious and worried about what could have happened to Faith. All we knew was that they got into a car accident. Adam’s car collided with someone else’s.
“I need you to stay calm, shortcake.” Ryan’s voice sounded composed as he gripped my elbows, looking at me calmly. “Before we go inside, when they tell you to that you have to go, you have to follow their order.”
Shaking my head, I tugged at his arm. “Faith needs me, Ryan. I need to be there for my baby. There hasn’t been a time that I wasn’t by her side when she gets hurt!”
Ryan nodded his head but continued to hold me in place. “I know, baby, but right now, I need you to cooperate. I don’t know the state of Faith’s condition and until I kno
w that it’s safe for you to come in, I will get you. But right now, Katie, sweetheart, you have to trust me.”
The sensible part of me understood what Ryan was trying to say but at the same time, I didn’t seem able to grasp the concept of it. “What do you mean that…”
But Ryan already turned his back on me and marched to the ER. He scanned the patients and rushed to one where the nurses were clustered together.
I rushed to follow him.
“What’s the patient’s condition?”
“Involved in a vehicular crash. She went through the windshield. Ribs seem to be broken but we still need an x-ray for confirmation. Possible pneumothorax on the chest due to trauma.”
Ryan moved forward. There seemed to be no trace of the Ryan I’d left the house with a moment ago. He looked serious and composed as he began to assess Faith’s condition. “Run an MRI and CT-scan on her.” He lifted her shirt, pressing her stomach and muttered something under his breath.
Another staff approached them, giving them what seemed to be an x-ray.
Ryan hastily grabbed it from his hand, chewing on his bottom lip. He checked Faith again and shook his head, grabbed a tray, and proceeded to do a procedure on her.
I felt so dizzy watching him that I almost collapsed.
Ryan remained focused on the task at hand and the nurses seemed uneasy. “We need to get her in for surgery. Needle aspiration isn’t enough to treat the pneumothorax.”
The nurses didn’t move.
Another man with the same white coat as Ryan approached. “Dr. Bell, who’s going to conduct the surgery? We need a pediatric surgeon for this case.”
Ryan gritted his teeth in annoyance and almost lost his calm. “Then call a pediatric surgeon, give him that damn chart, and have him meet me at the OR!”
When he turned around, our eyes locked.
I could see the frenzied look clear in his green eyes, the kind a parent had when their child was in trouble.
Ryan didn’t say anything and he didn’t ask me to go away. He took a deep breath as he approached me, placing his hands on my arms, and squeezing gently. “We have to take her to the OR. I’ll take really good care of her, Kate,” he whispered.
I wanted to cry. I wanted to march into that operating room and hold my daughter’s hand. “She’s just a little kid, Ryan,” I whimpered, still in disbelief.
Ryan kissed my forehead. “I’ll take good care of her, I promise.” He motioned for a nurse to guide me outside of the ER as they wheeled my daughter to the operating room.
I collapsed on the chair in the waiting area, my mind a jumble of flying thoughts. I knew I should call my parents and Andrew to inform them of this. But the thing was, I didn’t dare to pick up my phone and do so.
It was hard for me to grasp the fact that Faith got into an accident. My precious daughter that I’d taken good care of for years was involved in a car crash. I’d always thought it was something that would never happen. She was only six years old and the idea of her tiny body involved in something like that broke my heart in more ways than one.
“Kate.”
When I turned, I saw Adam. He looked banged up but the fact that he was standing while my daughter was rushed into the operating room made me hate him.
“Kate, I-I didn’t see…” He was sputtering and he fell on his knees, crying. “I’m so sorry, Kate. I’m so sorry.”
I wanted to slap him, scream, and cause a scene. He came back into Faith’s life seven years later, only to get her involved in a possible fatal car accident. “Leave.”
“Kate, please.”
My gaze remained planted on the floor. “You waltzed back in her life demanding you had the right to be her father. I was stupid enough to let you because Faith deserved to have her father around. But this is what happens?”
“I didn’t mean to.”
“Kate!” My father’s voice sounded firm and echoed throughout the white hallway of the hospital.
I stood up and rushed into my mother’s embrace, breaking down in her arms.
Dad wrapped his arms around me and they let me cry my fear and worry.
When I calmed down, it was then when I realized Adam had left. He must’ve been afraid my dad would beat him up if they knew what happened. I recounted to them all I knew.
My dad was livid, desperate to get his hands on Adam to beat him up.
But we deep down, all knew it wasn’t entirely Adam’s fault. It was still an accident.
It took about another hour when Ryan came out of the OR, looking exhausted.
Another doctor followed him out. Dr. Jenner explained to us that Faith’s condition was stable and she needed to be monitored in the hospital for a couple of days.
Faith was lucky that she didn’t acquire really bad injuries. She had two fractured ribs and suffered a trauma on her chest which cause a pneumothorax. It was why she needed surgery but she was okay now.
They wheeled her to a room. My parents and I stayed by her side as she slept.
I suddenly felt so tired. The fear of knowing that Faith was in the emergency room took all of my energy. At some point, my parents told me they would get some dinner. Suddenly, I realized how the time flew by.
Just as they were about to leave, Ryan arrived. He looked as tired as I was and hugged my mom while my dad patted his back.
My parents asked him if he wanted anything for dinner, so he told them they could get him whatever.
When the door closed, Ryan pulled a chair next to mine and collapsed beside me.
I leaned into him, craving the comfort his warmth brought. We didn’t say a word to each other and simply stared at Faith, like two parents worn down by the fear of the possibly losing their child.
“I was so scared,” Ryan whispered, breaking the silence. His eyes were glued on Faith’s sleeping face. “When I saw her, I-I almost forgot everything I learned in medical school. It hits different when it’s someone you love.”
His words almost triggered another stream of tears from me.
“She’s not mine, Kate, but seeing her so limp and weak and vulnerable, it killed me.”
I reached for his hand and closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. “You did good, Ryan. You made sure that my baby was safe and you made sure I was okay. You were our hero today.”
He kissed the top of my head and held my hand, his thumb rubbing circles on mine.
Even with the simplest gesture, Ryan made my heart burst. I knew the worst was over for Faith because she was in a stable condition. But there was still an elephant in my heart that I knew needed to be addressed.
What I’m trying to say, shortcake is that I love you.
I am in love with you.
Ryan confessed his feelings for me and didn’t ask me to say it back right away. He wanted to let me know and honestly, at that moment, I wasn’t sure how to respond. That old fear remained in the back of my mind that he was Ryan Bell and he used to break hearts.
But earlier today, I saw him in a different light, the way I recently seemed to. He assured me in a way that only he could while struggling with the situation himself. I saw my fear in his face when he handled Faith but he didn’t let it sway him. He loved my daughter when she wasn’t even his and feared the idea of losing her, as much as he feared the idea of losing me.
With a stunned realization, I knew that I did not want to lose this man in my life.
We remained quiet, watching Faith, lost in our thoughts until a knock came on the door.
Ryan made a move to get it but I held him back. I wasn’t sure if he was the one who performed the operation but since he was there too, he must’ve been tired.
When I opened the door, honey-colored eyes met mine.
Adam looked beaten. He had a cut on his head that required a bandage. He had bruises on his face and his arm was in a cast.
I didn’t look at him enough when he came to see me in the waiting room to realize he had been injured.
Still, I wanted to slam the door in hi
s face.
“I want to see her,” he said it as more of a demand than a request.
It made me scoff. “Why should I let you?”
The pain in Adam’s eyes was clear. “She’s my daughter, Kate. It was an accident but I deserve to know and see how she’s doing.”
Ryan got up from his seat and I felt his presence beside me before he spoke, “If you kept your eyes on the road, your daughter wouldn’t be in this state. Do you honestly think that she’ll let you see Faith because you deserve to? You didn’t even want to be a part of her life and now you come back and demand that Kate give you your rights as a father so easily?”
Recognition flashed in Adam’s eyes when his gaze fell on Ryan. “So you’re the Ryan that Faith talks about, the one that Kate’s seeing. Look, Ryan, just because you’re seeing Faith’s mother doesn’t give you the right to say those things to me. I am still Faith’s father and that is something you will never be. You don’t call the shots here.”
Ryan lunged at him, grabbing him by the collar, and ramming him up against the opposite wall.
I gasped loudly, trying to yank Ryan from Adam.
“You fucking asshole. You think you can come back into their life and expect everything to go the way you want to? You left, remember? You turned your back on them. You lost your chance of being a father to a wonderful girl.”
Adam pushed Ryan off of him while glaring. “You can’t stop me from being her father because that is my right. Oh, and since you’ve mentioned it, I am expecting things to go my way. I am Faith’s father and you are just a guy that Kate’s seeing. Faith’s going to want a normal family and we are what’s normal.”
Ryan glared at him, his green eyes dark with livid anger.
But Adam wasn’t done yet as he shoved Ryan. “You may be the guy she’s seeing now. Faith may like having you around. But I’m back in the picture. You can do whatever you want and be her hero but you will never be her dad.”
Ryan’s fists were clenched and he was restraining hard not to punch Adam. He shook his head as he pushed past Adam, and walked off.
