Mean Little People

by Dearth, Paige

  “I guess some people are,” Tony admitted.

  “Do you like that people are afraid of you?”

  Tony shrugged. “Not really—only when it means somethin’, I guess.” “What does that mean?”

  “It means that when someone is fuckin’ wit’ one of the members, don’t matter if it’s one of the boys or girls, people back down when they find out who we are.”

  “There are girls in your gang?”

  “Sure there are. But it ain’t like we go out wit’ ’em or nothin’. I mean, some of the guys and girls are together, but I ain’t wit’ no one, if that’s what you’re thinkin’.”

  “Good. That’s good to hear.”

  Kate stopped walking, and Tony looked at her. “What’s wrong?”

  She nodded toward the Hispanic man’s house.

  “Yeah, yeah, wait here. I’ll be right back.”

  Tony left Kate on the sidewalk and went up to the door. He knocked, and a moment later, the Hispanic man with a helluva black eye opened the door.

  “What do ya want?” he said.

  Tony took his hands out of his pockets just in case he needed to use them.

  “See that girl that you were sayin’ nasty shit to?”

  The Hispanic man looked over Tony’s shoulder and spotted Kate. “Yeah.”

  “You so much as look in her direction, and I’ll come back here and break every rotten bone in your body. She better never tell me that you or any of these other dicks around here said somethin’ to her. Don’t look at her. Don’t tell her she’s pretty. Don’t say a foul fuckin’ word to her. Don’t smile at her. Pretend she’s fuckin’ invisible. An invisible grenade will explode in your ugly face if ya so much as fantasize about her when you’re lying in your bed alone at night. You got me?”

  Tony opened his hands and extended them palms up toward the man, as if in a plea for peace. The Hispanic man saw the Slayers’ tattoo, which was exactly what Tony wanted. “Yeah, man, yeah, I hear ya. Ya ain’t gotta worry ’bout me.”

  “Good. Now, I want cha to wave to my girl.”

  The Hispanic man looked over Tony’s shoulder and gave Kate a quick wave of his hand.

  “Ya have a good night.” Tony turned and walked back to Kate.

  “What did you say to him?”

  “I told ’im I was sorry and didn’t mean to hurt ’im or cause ya any trouble.”

  “What did he say?”

  “He said he understood that he never shoulda called out to ya. Said to tell ya he was sorry and he won’t do it again. He said he knew it was ignorant.”

  “See? Don’t ya feel better that you apologized?”

  “Sure. Come on, Kate. Let’s get cha home.”

  Tony and Kate sat on her front steps and talked for over an hour; then he stood to leave. Kate stood in front of Tony, and he put his arm around her waist.

  “Can I kiss ya?” he asked.

  Kate smiled and nodded enthusiastically.

  Their mouths slowly came together and Tony pulled her closer to him. He gently separated her lips with his tongue, and a sensation of pure joy ran through him. He could’ve stood in that spot and kissed Kate until he died. When they parted, their eyes met.

  “You’re the first boy I ever kissed.”

  “Oh, yeah? How was it?”

  Kate blushed. “It was good, but I mean, I don’t really have anything to compare it to.”

  “Here, compare it to this,” he said, leaning in and sharing another kiss.

  “You better go. My mom will be home soon.”

  Tony held Kate tightly. “I’ll see ya tomorra,” he whispered.

  “I can’t wait,” she rasped.

  As Tony caught the bus back to North Philadelphia that night, he felt as though he had left something behind—as if he’d forgotten something important, something that he would need. All he could think about was Kate. He wanted to be with her more than anything else in the world. He was still thinking of Kate when he walked into the Slayers’ house and was met with the unexpected.

  Chapter Sixty-Three

  When Tony stepped through the door of the Slayers’ house, an acidy smell filled his sinuses. The living room was cloudy, and heavy white smoke hung in the air. The smell was overbearing, and he quickly tried to identify what had happened. The girls were screaming at each other, and most of the male gang members were standing around, whispering.

  Tony found Blast in the kitchen. “What the hell happened?”

  “That brainless bitch Tanya brought some neighborhood thugs in the house to party. They smoked up most of the crack we had in the back. She cost us a lot of money. Whatever they didn’t smoke they stole. We’re putting together a group to go out and find them.”

  “Where’s Tanya?”

  “She’s upstairs. Razor and a couple others took her up there a while ago. They’re beating the hell outta her.”

  “Why does it smell so bad in here?”

  “Because the assholes smoked a shit-ton of it in here and then burned all the plastic bags that we use to sell it.”

  Tony eased his way up to the second floor. He could hear Tanya screaming and begging for her life. By the time he reached the bedroom where they had her, a bunch of the members were gathered in front of the open doorway. Tony, being taller than most of them, had a view inside the room. Tanya was lying on the floor while Razor and Boner took turns kicking her. Between their kicks, Goldie would scurry in and punch her.

  Tony looked at the member next to him. “They’re gonna kill ’er.”

  “Maybe. She deserves whatever she gets. Tanya knows the rules. She knew better than to steal from us, and now she’s gotta pay the piper.”

  However, Tony didn’t agree. He believed in some rules of the house, and he thought Tanya had done a stupid thing. But he also knew that Razor, Boner, and Goldie thrived on violence and power. After a few more seconds, Tanya was nonresponsive. She no longer flinched or buckled at the blows they were giving her.

  “Hey,” Tony yelled. “Think she’s had enough?”

  Razor looked up at him. His eyes were glazed over by fury, and his hair was disheveled. He was breathing hard and slightly bent at the waist. “She’s had enough when I say she’s had enough. Mind your own fuckin’ business.”

  In that short moment, one of the other girls dropped to her knees next to Tanya. She shook her, while the rest of them looked on. “Tanya,” she yelled over and again. Then she placed her fingers on Tanya’s neck.

  “She’s dead! You fuckin’ killed her!” the girl screamed.

  Razor faced everyone. “Let me be crystal clear. Anybody who touches our dope, steals our dope, or gives our dope away is dead. Anyone that lets people come into our house and fuck wit’ our stuff will be dead too, just like this fuckin’ tramp.”

  Razor roughly pushed his way through the gang, followed by Boner and Goldie. He stopped next to Tony. “Get rid of her body,” he commanded.

  Tony knew the other members were watching him. He nodded, went into the bedroom, and hoisted Tanya over his shoulder. He took her into his bedroom and wrapped her in a blanket and then carried her down the steps, heading toward the front door.

  “Whoa, dude,” Blast said, going after him. “You can’t just take her outside like that.”

  “No? Then what the hell am I supposed to do wit’ her?”

  “Come on,” Blast said. Tony followed Blast into the basement, where there was an assortment of moldy junk. They walked over to an oval-shaped metal tub.

  “Put her in there,” Blast said and walked to the other side of the basement. When he came back, he was carrying two hand saws.

  “You’re kiddin’ me, right?”

  “No, it ain’t no joke. We gotta break her down into smaller pieces and burn them, and then we throw whatever is left into the river. It’ll make it practically impossible for anyone to figure out who the hell she was.”

  Blast took the saw and removed Tanya’s leg just below the knee. He paused and looked at Tony. �
��Come on, man. I’m helping ya here. Get moving.”

  Tony had seen and been a part of the violence since joining the Slayers. He had shot a guy in the leg once when the guy had pointed a gun in his face. He’d even saw the carnage of drive-bys that his gang had done. Initially, the blood and dead bodies had haunted his vision, made him see the coldhearted predator in man. After a time, he’d come to view the killing no differently than a coroner regards his or her job; it was just part of what they did; it came with gang life. This was the first time, though, that Tony had to dismember anyone, let alone someone he knew. He picked up the saw, drew in a deep breath, and hacked through Tanya’s arm.

  It wasn’t long before Tanya became unrecognizable as the metal tub filled with all the parts and pieces of what had been a human less than thirty minutes prior. Tony now realized how precious life could be, and his thoughts dwelled on Kate, as he desperately wanted to feel love in his heart especially while performing a despicable act with his hands.

  Chapter Sixty-Four

  Cutting Tanya into pieces weighed heavily on Tony’s mind. It made him wonder what kind of a man he was turning out to be. To offset the grungy feeling it gave him, he thought about Kate, and the warm feeling thawed his blood. It was late in the afternoon when he knocked on Kate’s door. When she answered it, her red, bloodshot eyes stood out against her pale face.

  “What’s wrong?”

  Kate sniffled, and Tony brushed away the tears clinging to her cheeks with his fingers.

  “My mom is sick.”

  “She’ll be OK. Don’t worry so much,” Tony said.

  “No, she won’t. The doctor said she has cancer.”

  “What kinda cancer?” Tony asked, not knowing what else to say.

  “Pancreatic cancer. She told me this morning.”

  Tony did not understand what having pancreatic cancer meant. He stood quietly for a moment. “Can they cut it out?”

  Kate shook her head. “Her doctor said it’s too far gone. Cancer is already in her other organs.”

  Tony hesitated for a moment. He didn’t want to upset Kate more than she already was, but he needed to ask. “Is she gonna die?”

  “Yeahhhhhhh,” she screeched in a long, drawn-out wail of despair.

  Tony pulled her to him, and she sobbed against his chest. After a while, Tony looked down into her face.

  “What’s your mother gonna do?”

  “Nothing. She said she wants to die in peace. The doctors offered her to try new things, to see if they can make her live longer, but she said she ain’t gonna be a lab rat for nobody.”

  “Oh,” he said sadly, “is she home?”

  “Yeah, you wanna meet her?”

  “Sure, I guess so. Is she up for meetin’ me?”

  Kate smiled softly, her expression mixed with sadness and love. “I told her all about ya. She knew you were coming today. She would really like it if you came in.”

  Tony followed Kate inside. Her mother was sitting on the sofa, covered with a blanket, a box of tissues next to her.

  “Mom, this is Tony.”

  Tony stepped closer, and Kate’s mother looked up at him.

  “Nice to meet cha, Tony. I’m Darren. I heard a lot about ya. Kate’s been tellin’ me about cha all day.”

  “How…how do you feel, Darren?”

  “Like a piece of shit stuck in the treads of a work boot.”

  Tony laughed. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh.”

  “Well, me and Kate have been cryin’ all day. Ever since the doctor called this morning. So hearing someone laugh ain’t so bad right about now.”

  Tony crossed his arms over his chest. He felt awkward and intrusive.

  Darren held his gaze. “Listen, Tony, relax. Ya don’t know me or Kate too well, but I’m happy that my baby has someone that she likes. So I don’t want cha to feel uncomfortable. It’s my own fault, really. I work all the time and never go to the doctor like I ought to. All I care about now is making sure that Kate is gonna be OK when I’m gone.”

  Kate threw herself next to her mother. “Please don’t say that,” she wailed. “And it’s not your fault…I read today that pancreatic cancer is real hard to find because there aren’t any symptoms. It doesn’t mean you can’t beat this, Mom!”

  Darren put her arm around Kate. “I told ya what the doctor said. I might not have too much longer. We gotta be thinkin’ about what’s gonna happen to ya. Maybe Tony can help.”

  Kate’s mouth dropped open, and she stared at her mother. “Tony and me don’t even know each other that well. This ain’t his problem. We’re only sixteen years old.”

  “I never said it was Tony’s problem. But if ya like ’im the way ya said and he likes you, then maybe we can figure somethin’ out. We ain’t got no family. I’m gonna call tomorra to see if there’s a place the city can put ya after I’m gone. All I’m sayin’ is that maybe Tony can check on ya. So that ya have someone that ya can trust.”

  Darren’s statement hit a nerve with Tony. He knelt down in front of the mother and daughter. “I know kids who lived in those kinds of places. That ain’t gonna be no good for Kate. There’s gotta be somewhere else.”

  “Where? She can’t stay here,” Darren explained. “She’s underage, and our landlord won’t have it. Besides, she ain’t gonna have the money to pay no rent. He’ll kick her out as soon as I die. He’s a real jerk-off, that one.”

  “We can figure it out,” Kate whimpered. “I need ya to stay here with me.”

  Darren took in a deep breath. “I wish I could, baby. But ya know I’ve always been real wit’ cha and told ya the truth. It’s the only way to live. Otherwise, ya just spend your life bein’ disappointed or waitin’ for shit that never happens.”

  Darren hoisted her small frame from the sofa. She’d gone to the doctor in the first place because she’d been vomiting for weeks. At first, she’d thought it was the flu, but when it didn’t stop, she knew something worse was going on inside of her.

  After they heard the bathroom door close and lock, Tony sat on the sofa next to Kate and put his arms around her.

  “Don’t worry, Kate. I’ll figure somethin’ out. I just need some time to think.”

  “What are ya gonna figure out?” Kate ranted. “I need an answer right now! I want my mom to be here with me, forever.”

  Tony inched closer to Kate. “I got an idea.”

  Kate nodded. “What kinda idea?”

  “I want ya to meet somebody. Maybe they can help ya…ya know, when your mother is gone.”

  Kate’s head hung. She knew her mother was going to die, but it was still too soon for her to accept it. Tony saw the vacant look in her eyes, and his heart bled, his chest heavy with sorrow for Kate. Tony kissed Kate softly on her neck and moved up until his mouth found hers. They shared a bittersweet kiss mixed with tenderness and sadness. Tony stood, pulled Kate to her feet, and wrapped her in a tight embrace. In that moment, Kate felt safe and she wanted to cling to Tony for the rest of her life.

  “Your mom can stay here by herself for a little bit, right?”

  “I guess so.”

  “Can ya tell her we’re goin’ out for a while?”

  Kate walked to the bathroom door. She gently placed her ear on the door and heard Darren retching. “Mom? Are you all right?”

  “Yeah, I’d be fine if it wasn’t for this fuckin’ cancer,” she growled.

  “Is it OK if Tony and I go out for a while?”

  “Sure, Kate. Just make sure that he walks ya home. And will ya bring me some ginger ale when ya come home?”

  “Yeah. Are you sure you’ll be OK by yourself?”

  “I’m dying, Kate. It don’t mean that I can’t be alone for a few hours. Ya can’t be here wit’ me all the time.”

  Kate placed her palm flat against the weathered bathroom door. “I love you.”

  “I love you too, baby. Have fun. Be careful.”

  Thirty minutes after leaving Kate’s house, they were in the Italian Market. To
ny and Kate were walking hand in hand when they reached the bakery. Tony pulled the door open, and the bell over top jingled. Donata looked up from a cake she was decorating, and her face lit up.

  “So you’re the young lady that Tony keeps talkin’ about. He hasn’t shut up about ya for two days,” she said, rushing forward, wiping her hands on her apron.

  “Well, I guess I know ya can’t keep any secrets,” Tony said mockingly.

  “Oh, hush up. You’re Kate, right?”

  Kate smiled. “Yeah, nice to meet ya.”

  “I’m Donata. Come in, honey. Tell me about yourself,” she said.

  As Kate and Donata chatted, Tony went behind the counter where Ruth was placing cookies on a tray in a perfect line for the display case.

  “Hey, Ruth,” Tony said, bending and giving her a hug.

  “Hi,” Ruth said nonchalantly.

  “What’s wrong wit’ cha?”

  Ruth flashed a look in Kate’s direction. Her lips were pressed together, and she stared at Kate through squinted eyelids. Tony watched the young girl in fascination. He knew that Ruth liked being special to him and that she probably felt threatened by Kate. Tony put his mouth close to Ruth’s ear.

  “Kate don’t change how I feel ’bout ya, Ruth. You’ll always be my favorite girl,” he whispered.

  Ruth spun on him. “Really? Because you’re the only friend I have. And if she takes you away from me and Gram, then we won’t see you anymore. I thought you loved us.”

  “Of course I love you guys.” Tony said, chuckling. “Really. There ain’t a girl on this planet that can take your place. Ya see, the difference between you and Kate is that she’s my girlfriend, but you, you’re my family already. Ya ain’t got nothin’ to worry about. You understand me?”

  Ruth crossed her arms and pouted. She thought about what Tony had said for a moment. “So are you saying that if you had to pick between me and her, you’d pick me?”

  Tony gave Ruth a hug. “I’m saying there’s plenty of me to go around and that I can take care of both of ya, Donata too.”

  Ruth hesitated a moment; then she slipped her arms around Tony’s neck, and he lifted her off of the ground.