Christina's Bear

by Jane Wakely

  “Do you enjoy planning parties?” Bull asked as he pushed the cart beside her.

  “Yes, very much.” She started to turn down an aisle and changed her mind after recognizing the clerk from the market staring at the loaves of bread of the shelves. “Do you enjoy working construction?” She tried to keep the conversation going, hoping that Bull didn’t notice.

  He did.

  “You don’t need bread?” She turned back to see he’d stopped at the end of the aisle.

  “Not yet, I’ll pick it up last.” She continued walking until she reached the tofu. Starring at the varieties, she hoped he’d drop it.

  He didn’t.

  Instead he leaned over and whispered in her ear. “What are you going to do if he’s still staring at the bread when you go back?”

  The tofu became blurry. She was afraid something like this would happen. She’d have to tell Bull about her past and then he’d know how stupid she’d been. Once he found out, would he leave? She should have gone shopping first then she could have kept him to herself for at least one day. Maybe he could have looked past all of her faults.

  “Hey, c’mere.” Bull pulled her into his arms, held her tight, and whispered again. “You’ve got me now and everyone is afraid of me. You don’t have to hide from anyone anymore.”

  She hoped it was true. The warmth of his embrace felt so right and his arms made her feel like she could face anyone or anything.

  As if sensing a need to lighten the mood Bull said, “Why are we standing in front of the tofu? You tempted me with salmon. You never mentioned tofu. I’m not eating salmon flavored tofu.”

  Christina laughed, she couldn’t help it. He sounded so serious. He’d done exactly the right thing to make her forget her fears and push away the sadness. She was grateful. She didn’t want to cry in the tofu aisle of the health food store.

  She lingered in his arms for another minute before reluctantly pulling away.

  Chapter Seven

  He’d made her laugh.

  The thought of Christina crying because of some jerk had him wanting blood, but the urge to console her was greater. Without thinking he’d pulled her into his arms. He wanted her to know he would protect her from anything. The health food store wasn’t the place to discuss it though and he’d made a joke instead. It had worked.

  He liked how she seemed to remain in his arms seconds longer than necessary. He hated to let her go, but loosened his hold when she pulled back.

  Christina held up her first finger and thumb really close together.

  “An itty-bitty bit of tofu and a whole lot of salmon, okay?” Her eyes sparkled, but not from the threat of tears. Bull had a feeling he was getting an equal share of tofu and salmon.

  “Okay.” He didn’t care. He couldn’t deny her anything.

  She turned to the tofu again, made her choice and put it in the cart.

  “By the way,” she paused until his eyes met hers. “I’m not afraid of you, Bull.” Christina finished, and turned to walk toward the produce department.

  Bull was too stunned to move. She wasn’t afraid of him? He’d lost his temper twice in front of her, yelled and almost punched his friend in the face. She wasn’t afraid?

  She did come to his hotel and wanted to spend the day with him, but somehow that didn’t erase his idea of her fear in his mind.

  After agreeing to eat whatever she made, Bull had watched as Christina studied the tofu before finding the one she wanted. During that time he’d fought the urge to find the guy from the market and pound him. What was Christina hiding from? Remembering what the guy had said the night before, was it that she’d dated a lot? Had she slept around? While the thought wasn’t something he wanted to think about, he wouldn’t hold her past against her. He wanted to know her secrets. He wanted to know everything about her.

  “Hi Christina, how are you doing?” Bull had caught up and a short, slim woman with white blond hair was talking to his mate. She wore an apron with the store’s logo on the front and a nametag that read ‘Hollie.’

  “I’m doing great, I’m making tofu-salmon and I needed some things. This is Bull. He’s new in town and friends with Matt, Jenn’s fiancé.”

  The woman looked up at him with wide violet eyes, took a step back and looked around seemingly for an escape route. Now that he was closer, he could smell the reason why. Rabbits always ran when they found themselves face to face with a bear.

  “You’re going to eat tofu?” From the look on her face, the words had slipped out unexpectedly.

  “And salmon,” he laughed. “Relax little one. I’m not going to hurt you.” He kept his voice low, trying not to frighten her.

  Hollie shifted her eyes from him to Christina and back again several times before nodding her acceptance.

  “It’s nice to meet you, Bull. I hope the two of you enjoy your lunch.” As she scurried off, the little bunny yelled over her shoulder. “Bye Christina. I’ll see you later.”

  They both watched Hollie run off then Bull turned to find Christina watching him, a defeated expression on her face before she forced a smile and silently chose a few tomatoes.

  Something had happened, but what? Bull replayed the last few minutes over and over and his only conclusion was Christina was jealous of Hollie. It made sense. They hadn’t had time to talk about what he was or her place in his life. This was their first “date” and they barely knew each other. Of course she would feel threatened by his attention toward another woman, even if it was to stop the other woman from running for her life.

  They needed to talk—about everything—but first he needed to say something to let her know she was the only one on his mind.

  “Hollie seems nice. Are the two of you good friends?” Bull asked as Christina waited her turn at the seafood counter.

  “We’re pretty close. I’ve known her for awhile.” She took a deep breath. “I could give her your phone number if you want.” She wouldn’t look at him and he understood how hard it must have been for her to offer. He needed to tread carefully.

  “Christina, your number is the only one I want or need.” So much for being careful.

  Her ticket was called just as she opened her mouth to respond, but Bull saw the smile she couldn’t hide when she placed her order with the store clerk.

  Maybe he didn’t need to be so careful after all.

  ****

  When Bull called Hollie “little one,” Christina had been crushed. “Little” was not something she could ever use to describe herself. He sounded so sweet, she thought he must be attracted to Hollie. She felt silly for believing what Matt had told her about mates and basically throwing herself at Bull. Her mind raced for an excuse to end the date early.

  Your number is the only one I want or need.

  Did he mean it? Was she overreacting to his exchange with Hollie? Before she could say anything, her ticket was called. She put the wrapped salmon in the cart and walked toward the bread aisle.

  Christina cringed when she turned and saw not only the guy from the market, but Derek as well. Even if she wanted to she couldn’t turn back. She knew Bull would never let her get away with leaving the store without bread.

  “Hey Christina, where’s your body guard?” The guy from the market laughed.

  “Yeah, I heard you’re dating someone louder than you this time.” Derek laughed, too.

  Their laughter died and from the looks on their faces, Bull had turned into the aisle. He pushed the shopping cart past Christina and stopped in front of the two men.

  “Hey guys, is there a problem?” Bull asked, staring them down.

  Derek and his friend where about the same height as Christina, but next to Bull’s muscle bound body, they looked small and weak. They both stared up at Bull like two kids in trouble with their dad and neither said a word.

  “Unless she speaks to you first, you are not to talk to her again. Do you understand me?” His voice was barely above a whisper, but the message was clear.

  Both m
en nodded their heads before Bull stepped back as if giving them permission to leave—and they both nearly ran down the aisle to get away from him.

  Christina stared after them. She was positive they wouldn’t bother her again. Without explanation, Bull had defended her. The only other person who had ever done that for her was Jenn.

  “You don’t have to tell me, but I hope one day you will,” Bull said, bringing her attention back to him and his warm smile. “So, we need bread?”

  Christina nodded and picked up a loaf off the shelf.

  She would tell him. If Bull was willing to defend her without knowing about her past, then she could trust him with the details. Besides, if Matt was right and they were mates, she didn’t want to keep anything from him.

  Chapter Eight

  They drove to her house in comfortable silence and Bull carried in the groceries. After Christina put everything away, she gave him a tour of the apartment.

  “This was Jenn’s room. You’re still welcome to move in if you want to. I was thinking about moving before Jenn mentioned you needed a place to stay.”

  “This is a great place. I like how there’s so much forest surrounding the community.” He wanted to stay, but not in this room. He wanted to share Christina’s room with her.

  “Me too. It’s one of the great things about Chestnut Rock. One day I hope to own a house this close to the forest. It’s so beautiful.”

  “It is. I find it very soothing.” Matt was right, Chestnut Rock did sooth his restless bear, but part of the reason was because he’d found Christina. He needed to tell her what he was.

  As he tried to find the words, they stood together looking out the window of the empty room and enjoying the view. Straight to the point was usually the best way for these things.

  “When we first moved here two years ago, I went on a date with Derek. He was mean and I left during dinner, but Derek told everyone that we slept together. All of his friends asked me out and tried to get me to have sex with them. I found out later it was a joke to see which one could bang the tall, loud girl. They’ve been laughing at me ever since.”

  Christina beat him to it. It all came out in a rush, she’d barely taken a breath between sentences as she continued to stare out the window.

  Deep breath in, deep breath out. Bull nodded and breathed, trying to control his bear. If he had known those men had been badgering his mate for two years, he wouldn’t have let them get away. Christina hadn’t moved, but her back was straight and her shoulders stiff.

  “If I had known,” he took a deep breath and she hung her head. He realized she was waiting for him to dismiss her. It was time to tell her everything. “I wouldn’t have let them walk away so easily.” Blue eyes met his. “I told you in the tofu store that I’d take care of you. You’re not getting rid of me that easy.”

  “It’s not the ‘tofu store’,” she laughed, “and I thought maybe…”

  “That I wouldn’t like you anymore because of what some jerk said about you?”

  “Well, that and because I’m tall and loud.”

  “No you’re not. You’re perfect.”

  He kissed her because he couldn’t not kiss her anymore. Before he shared his secrets, and possibly lost her, he needed a taste of her beautiful mouth.

  Strawberries. Her mouth tasted like strawberries. Bull couldn’t help wonder if she tasted like strawberries everywhere.

  ****

  I’m perfect! Christina only had a moment to savor the words before Bull surprised her with his kiss. Warm, soft lips brushed across hers in gentle, careful movements one would never expect from someone of his size. He didn’t possess her or force his tongue; instead he persuaded and begged with his lips. It didn’t take long before Christina opened her mouth and let her tongue meet his. He discovered her mouth, tasting every inch and Christina welcomed his exploration.

  Her hands roamed his firm chest and shoulders and when he kissed down her jaw, Christina pulled him closer, encircling her arms around his waist. Bull’s hands didn’t roam, instead he held tight onto her waist with her shirt bunched up in his fingers as if he fought for some control.

  “Bull…” She whispered his name as he licked her collarbone. She was begging without saying the words.

  “Christina, I…we need to talk.” He pulled his mouth away from her skin and met her eyes.

  “Now?” Christina didn’t want to talk, but Bull looked so serious. She had a feeling he was about to tell her his secret so she agreed. “Okay, let’s go sit on the couch.”

  Leading the way, Bull followed her out of the room and they sat down in the middle of the couch together, side by side.

  Bull held her hand but he didn’t face her. Instead, he focused on the TV even though it was turned off. Christina watched as he swallowed several times, seemingly trying to formulate the words.

  He cleared his throat and began to speak.

  “This might be difficult to hear at first, but I have something important to tell you.” He cleared his throat again. “Do you know anything about shifters?”

  “A little bit.”

  She’d surprised him and he met her eyes.

  “You do?”

  “Yes. Last night after you ran off, Matt told me and showed me his wolf. He also described a little bit about mates and the strong connection he and Jenn share.”

  “Did he tell you you’re my mate?”

  “Matt didn’t confirm anything, but it made sense to all of us that you were talking about me when you told him about our meeting in the market and then later, when you tried to hit him after you found out we’d kissed.”

  He growled at the mention of her long ago kiss with Matt. “Ugh, don’t remind me.”

  “It was a long time ago and it didn’t mean anything, or do anything, for me.” She laughed.

  “Don’t even joke about it. You are my mate. I can’t stand the thought of you with anyone else, even if it was in the past. You’re really not afraid of me?”

  “No, I’m really not.” The thought that she could be afraid of him was absurd to her. Maybe she needed to let him know she thought he was perfect, too.

  “There’s a lot of other stuff I need to tell you—and I know we need to take it slow—but when you’re ready I want to marry you.” This time he’d surprised her.

  “Bull, you hardly know me. You can’t know that for sure.” Even as she said the words, allowing him to change his mind and take his back, she wanted them to be true.

  “Actually, I can. It’s different for shifters. Like I said, there’s a lot of other stuff you need to know, but there’s no doubt in my mind you’re the only one for me.”

  He seemed so certain. Christina couldn’t stop the tear that escaped and slid down her cheek.

  “Hey, it’ll be okay. I won’t rush you and if we never marry, it’ll be fine. I just want to be with you.” He wiped away the tear with his thumb and kissed her lips. “Do you think we can give it a try?”

  Christina hugged him tight.

  “I’m crying because I’m happy, Bull. I want to be with you, too.”

  “You do?”

  “Yes, very much.”

  “Good.” He sighed and seemed to relax. “As long as those are happy tears, let them fall.”

  He held her tight and let her cry until she pulled out of his arms and rested her head on his shoulder.

  “So, do you shift into a bull?”

  “No, a bear,” he said laughing.

  “A bear? Really?” She pulled back to study his face. Seeing him nod, she put her head back on his shoulder. “Then why does everyone call you Bull?”

  He laughed again.

  “Growing up with this big body was difficult, especially as a teenager. I was really uncoordinated and my mom said I was like a bull in a china shop. The name just stuck.”

  “You’re nothing like that now, although I like Bull better than James.”

  “Yeah, me too.”

  Chapter Nine

  “Bull?”
Christina asked quietly.

  “Yeah?” He cleared his throat, ready to answer her questions.

  “Is that all we needed to talk about?”

  Her words had his pulse racing. Somehow they made him think of sex.

  They’d sat on the couch with her head on his shoulder for several minutes after they discussed his name. He wanted to kiss her again, but he gave her time to ask questions and adjust to what he’d told her.

  Christina didn’t ask any questions. She’d taken the information remarkably well and he was a bit surprised. She hadn’t asked to see his bear or any specific details about his animal. It worried him, but he didn’t want to force her to accept him. He hoped she would though. He wanted her to accept all of him. He didn’t want her to be afraid.

  “That’s all for now.” Her silence was driving him crazy. Would she make him leave? Could she accept him? Bull wished she would say something.

  “Okay. Do I get to see your bear?”

  Could it be that easy?

  “Yes, if you want to, I want you to see it. I don’t want you to be afraid though, I’m a Grizzly and I’m big, but I would never hurt you.”

  “Will you know it’s me?”

  “Yes. Except for some exaggerated senses, I’m the same as I am now—just in a different form. I’ll be a bear, but I keep all of my human thoughts and feelings.”

  “That’s good. Then you can always find your way home.”

  He hoped she would be there waiting for him when he did.

  “Bull?” She whispered.

  “Yeah?” What would she say? His palms were sweating and his skin felt too tight. He’d walk out if she asked him to, but it would tear his heart out.

  Christina laid her palm on his cheek and turned his head to face her. He’d been lost in thought and hadn’t heard what she’d said.

  “Kiss me.”

  ****

  Christina should have known Bull’s animal would be a bear. Due to his size and temperament, it made sense, but she didn’t really know much about bears. She’d have to pick his brain for the details, but that could wait until later.