Irreparably Broken

by K J Bell

  “How was the skiing?” she asks, leaning over to remove the hearts from her toes.

  I’m a goddamn pig. I say this because I’m blatantly staring down her shirt to catch a peek at her breasts. Fuck! She’s braless, and my eyes lock on the lightly tanned mounds. Then my pervert mind trails off, wondering how the tan reaches her nipples. Shaking away the thought before my dick reacts, I remember she’s asked me a question.

  “Uh…the skiing…it was sweet. You guys should have come out. It was a great day for it.”

  “I’ll bet.” She rolls her bottom lip between her teeth slowly just as I pull on my beer. I cough and nearly spit beer all over her. “Sorry I missed it.”

  She bites down on her lip again. Is she doing that on purpose? For a passing second I consider kissing her. I think about wrapping her hair around my fingers and pulling her mouth to mine. Sucking on that lip and making her come with my fingers. But it’s only a passing thought during a blip in time. It’s not right.

  “I’ve got something for you.”

  Her brow scrunches in confusion, as I retrieve the tissue square from my pocket. She rewards me with the smile I hoped for as she unfolds it. It says, What time do you work tomorrow?

  “I have to be there at eight in the morning.” She holds the tissue up. “You could have just asked.”

  “And miss the chance to rag on you about your nearly lethal assault?” I take another swig of my beer. She wrinkles her nose and shrugs. I’m sure she wants to punch me. “So…what time do you get off?”

  She tilts her head, looking at me like she’s trying to figure me out. I should tell her to get in line. “When Liv gets there at three.”

  I prop my beer on my knee, silently questioning what I’m about to do. “I’d like to take you somewhere tomorrow. Would you be okay with that, or am I pushing the friendship line?”

  She looks at me without talking, her eyes blinking rapidly. It’s an uncomfortable moment, but it doesn’t last long. “I’d be fine with it. Friends do hang out together, Brady,” she says with a reassuring smile.

  True, but they don’t think about ripping the others clothes off while they’re doing it. This might be a mistake, spending time with her, letting her in. I have to be careful. “Good, I’ll drop Liv off, and she can drive your Jeep home. We’ll leave from the Bean.”

  Her hand lands on my upper thigh, and I nearly spit beer again. The blush sweeping across her cheeks tells me she didn’t intend to land so high up, and she promptly pulls her hand away. She’s nervous, but her eyes smile, and she stares at my lips. How can I pretend I don’t have feelings for her, when all I want to do is kiss her? “Can I ask where we’re going?”

  I set my beer on the table, and turn to look at her, still amused by the color of her cheeks. “It’s a surprise. I just want to share something with you.”

  She looks down. “I’m glad you want to share something with me. And I love surprises.”

  The recess lighting above her casts a light directly over the swell of her breasts, enticing me. I move closer to her, lean in and take a deep breath. Our eyes lock, and I’m once again overcome with a desire to touch her, run my fingers all over her curvy body. I consider briefly going upstairs and getting her a robe to put on so I’m less tempted to pounce on her. I glance away, first to the right and then to the left, hoping she’ll move away from me. She doesn’t, and when I bring my eyes back to hers, there’s something in them that I don’t want to see. Something that scares the living shit out of me. She wants me as passionately as I want her.

  She smiles her gorgeous smile, the one that creates a commotion in my balls. “I love seeing that smile on your face.”

  I’m barely able to breathe, and then I do something I may live to regret.

  I lunge at her, pushing her into the couch with my body. Pressing my lips to hers, I wait for her to shove me or smack me, something to stop me because I can’t stop myself. A fulfilled moan leaves her mouth, urging me on. Her lips part, welcoming me inside, sweet and warm, and way too alluring. My tongue swipes across hers. Another moan escapes her throat, and I nearly lose it. We kiss with a heated urgency that has me wanting more of her, wanting her naked.

  Sliding my hand up the smooth skin of her thigh, I palm her firm ass under her shorts. Her legs wrap tightly around my waist and hold me to her body. I close my eyes, kissing the soft skin behind her ear, down her neck, and across her collarbone, I’m lost, intoxicated by her scent. Flowers, jasmine or violets, maybe. When I open my eyes to soft pink skin, I remember that this is wrong.

  I stand up swiftly and walk to the window, pressing on my erection. My balls ache, and I struggle to clear my head so I can talk to her. When I can finally breathe again, I turn to face her. Her cheeks are glowing red, and her hand covers her trembling lips. Her eyes are glossy, her pale blue irises cloudy, and tears are about to spill. I sit down next to her, and pull her hand from her mouth. She sucks in a ragged breath, holding back tears. “I’m so sorry, Tori. I crossed a line. It was wrong, and I promise I won’t let it happen again.”

  Her eyes look down at our joined hands and I swallow the lump in my throat, afraid of what she is about to say. “It’s okay. I crossed a line, too.”

  A sigh of relief rushes out of me. As much as I’m wrong for her, I can’t live without her. “Thank you. We’re finally friends again. I don’t want to mess that up.”

  “I don’t, either, Brady.” She stands and smiles up me. It’s a weak smile, but nonetheless I’m grateful for it. “I’m going to go up to bed. Goodnight.”

  “Goodnight.” I watch her slip away up the stairs until I hear her door close. Day one, and I’ve nearly screwed up the second chance she’s given me.

  Quiet isn’t good. Quiet means I have to listen to the manic voices in my head analyzing, worrying, and judging. Some argue with me to give into my desire, regardless of the consequences, while others remind me I don’t have the courage to stand up to my mother, and until I do, I’ll only wind up hurting Tori. My plan to keep my distance and just be friends is quickly going to hell.

  Chapter 10

  Tori

  Just before eight, I walk through the door of The Ocean Bean for my first day of work. Harrison’s already there and smiles brightly. Smiling back, I blush…again. Ugh, goddamn those dimples. I’m a sucker for dimples.

  Harrison gives me a white polo with the Ocean Bean logo on it, along with a red apron. After changing in the restroom, I go to the back room and put my clothes and purse inside one of the empty employee lockers. As I’m closing the locker door, something peeking out of the side pocket of my purse catches my eye. I pull it out and can’t stop smiling.

  It’s a tissue. In Brady’s handwriting it says, Thank you for forgiving me, again. Good luck on your first day. B. He’s even made a smiley face. Smile wide, I stuff the tissue back in my purse. Last night replays in my mind, Brady’s full, soft lips kissing me, his hands exploring my body so intensely. I can’t stifle the blush. As my cheeks warm, I know without a doubt that if he hadn’t pulled away, I would have slept with him. He ignites a passion in me that honestly scares and captivates me. I have no idea how he was able to stop, but I’m grateful he did. I want his friendship more than anything, and if things had gone further, I would have lost it forever. Brady’s obviously going through something incredibly painful. He’s not ready for any kind of romantic relationship. Pushing things with him would be detrimental to both of us.

  When I finally clock in for my shift, Harrison patiently walks me through the operation of all the levers and knobs on the equipment. In no time flat, I’ve got it down and am making drinks for customers. Harrison’s understanding is greatly appreciated when I spill more than a couple of drinks. Each time I do, he laughs quietly, winks at me, and then discreetly makes new ones. When the morning rush is over, the place is pretty much deserted. We spend our time cleaning up, chatting, and restocking the napkins and straws.

  Harrison begins wiping down counters. “So, what do you thi
nk? Not so hard, huh?”

  I pick up a rag and start helping him. His gaze follows me from table to table. “No, it wasn’t so bad. I think I’ve got the hang of it.”

  He stops and smiles. “Good. I’m glad you stopped in yesterday. It’s nice to work with someone when I like their company.”

  I giggle, snapping my mouth shut the second I let it out. What the hell? “Thanks, Harrison. I like working with you, too.”

  While he looks at me, the little tingles from yesterday make a return appearance. They’re not quite the sparklers-under-my-skin kind Brady ignites, but they’re definitely present.

  Harrison is stocking cups when he stops and smiles softly, shooting me a nervous glance. I know immediately what’s coming, and I have no idea what I’m going to say. “Would you go to dinner with me?”

  Like always, Liv was right. “I’d rather…” I start, considering spitting out a joke. A smile creeps up my cheeks as I hesitate. I can’t think of something painful I’d rather do than go out with him. In fact, I think I might enjoy a date with Harrison. The whole first-date hurdle is just not something I’m ready for. It’s the fear of letting anyone get close again that holds me back. “I’m not sure, Harrison.”

  “Okay, that’s cool. I understand.” His soft brown eyes gleam with disappointment before he looks away, and stares into the box of cups.

  I remember my promise to Liv, and consider saying yes. God damn Liv and her silly promise. She’s right, though – I need to get over Jake, have a life again, and Harrison is a nice guy. “You know what, Harrison? Yeah, I’d like to have dinner with you.”

  His eyes return to me, his dimples digging in deep as he smiles. “Great. How about tonight?”

  I think about my plans with Brady before I answer, figuring if Brady meets me at three, then surely we would be back by seven. “Okay,” I agree. “I have somewhere to be until around seven. Meet me here at seven-thirty.”

  His smile stretches across his entire face. “I’ll be here.”

  The rest of my shift flies by, and I only spill one more drink. Harrison and I spend a lot of time flirting. It’s not all verbal. Sometimes it’s a quick glance, and other times it’s an accidental brushing up against one another on purpose. I surprise myself when I realize I like Harrison. He’s funny, handsome, and incredibly sweet. He might be exactly the guy to make me forget about Jake. And maybe even Brady, though I’m not holding out hope on that one.

  Brady

  “You’re going to work at a coffee house. No one cares what you look like.”

  I wait impatiently on my sister’s bed for her to get ready. She ignores me and goes about doing something to her eyes with a tool that looks like it should be used for torturing someone rather than improving their appearance. The day has dragged on long enough. I can’t wait to see Tori. She’s slowly turning into a drug I can’t conceive living without. If I can make this friend thing work, then I won’t have to. Liv sets the torture device down and talks while applying black goop to her eyelashes. Her face in the reflection is hilarious, and I laugh out loud. She narrows her eyes in the reflection and then spins to face me.

  Her death glare alerts me to her irritation. “What’s so funny?”

  “Does it help when you do this?” Attempting to imitate her, I open my mouth, widen my eyes, and push my chin into my chest.

  She doesn’t laugh, and chucks the tube of goop at my head. “As a matter of fact, it does, asshole.”

  “Whoa! Sis, such language. I’m offended.” Tug is right. Liv is easy to annoy, and since I’m bored it’s also entertaining.

  She huffs a laugh and sticks her tongue out at me. “Right, I happen to know that not much offends you.”

  I pull my knees up, adjust the pillow behind me, and lie back on it. “Aw, yes, the downside to being my little sister. I bet you’ve heard some wild stories over the years.”

  “You have no idea.” She rolls her eyes and waves a hand in the air. “Between that and most of my girlfriends only wanting to hang out with me so I’d hook them up with you, it’s amazing I still love you.”

  Her words sting a little. “They’re not all true, you know.”

  She makes an “ick” face, wrinkling her nose. “God, I hope not! Some of them are pretty raunchy.”

  I laugh and pick up the tube of black goop, tossing it on her nightstand. “Well, those ones might be true.” Since I’m bored, I decide to snoop in her nightstand drawer, and now I wish I hadn’t. It’s full of condoms. Images of Liv and sex pop into my mind. I shake my head frantically, trying to clear it.

  Liv’s side-splitting laughter only makes it worse. “Guess that will teach you to stay out of my things.”

  She’s got that right; it will also give me nightmares. She finally walks away from the mirror. I think we are going to leave, but she sits down on the bed next to me and looks at me seriously.

  “What are you doing with Tori?”

  I figured this question was coming. I was prepared for it. “I’m taking her to T.J. to hang out. I’ve been craving carne asada from this little place down there and I don’t want to go alone.”

  “And you can’t take Jesse or one of your other friends?” She’s probing to get me to crack.

  I sigh and turn to my side, propped up on my elbow. “What do you really want to ask me, Liv?”

  “Are you making a play on my best friend?” She’s blunt as ever.

  Truthfully, I have no idea what I’m doing with Tori. I only know that I want to be near her as much as I possibly can. “Tori? What? No. We’re just friends. If you and Tug were around, I’d take you with us,” I reassure her. “Look, maybe if she and I hang out again, she’ll stop hating me and things will get back to normal. She’ll be your annoying little friend again.”

  “Well, all right.” The tone of her voice is clearly skeptical, and it should be. “That would be nice. I hate how things are with you two. She blames you for her breakup with Jake.”

  “I did kind of make that happen.” I shrug and look at the time – not because I want to know the time, but more likely because I want to know how long this little inquisition is going to last.

  She smiles. “You may have arranged it so she’d find out, but he was the one who cheated on her.”

  I shrug. “If it makes a difference, I think she hates him equally.”

  She averts her eyes and then raises them back to mine. Her expression is serious as she says, “If you are up to something, just don’t hurt her.”

  I pinch the bottom of her chin so she looks at me. “Liv, honestly, my head’s a mess right now. I have no intention of getting into a relationship with Tori or anybody else.”

  “Good!” She stands up. “Then have fun in T.J., and be careful. It’s not always safe down there.”

  I chuckle. “Thanks for the advice, but I think I can handle it.”

  Chapter 11

  Tori

  Brady and Liv show up promptly at three. When I hand Liv my keys, she’s looking at me with her patented “you are so going to spill later” look. When Brady sees Harrison, it’s apparent something is up with the two of them. Both of them stand taller, and their chests swell. Minus the feathers, they look like peacocks.

  “Brady,” Harrison greets him flatly.

  Brady scowls. “Harrison.”

  Wow! Just pull them out and measure them already. A testosterone-charged stare-down is taking place right in front of my eyes. It’s quite noticeable these two don’t like each other, and the tension in the air cramps the room.

  “Harrison, got a minute?” Ted’s rough voice calls from the back. Harrison finally ends the challenge and shoots me a quizzical glance. The tension follows him when he goes to see Ted.

  “You ready to go?”

  Brady turns to me, and I sigh. He’s too damn fine for his own good. The sleeves of his T-shirt stretch over the curve of his biceps. I remember what’s under his shirt, and stare at his chest. I even drool a little. Before I’m caught salivating, I look away.


  “Yep, all set.” I’m about to walk to the back room and tell Harrison that I’ll see him tonight when Brady intertwines our fingers and pulls me toward the door. Talk about tingles. I have them all over my body, and they start right between my legs. Just friends, I remind myself.

  “Later, sis,” Brady yells to Liv from the door.

  “Bye, you two.” When I turn, she mouths, what’s up?

  I roll my eyes and wave goodbye. I laugh silently, knowing her thoughts are going to drive her nuts all night.

  Brady opens the passenger door to his truck, and I pull myself up and in. He slides in the driver’s side and starts up the engine. He repositions himself in the seat to get comfortable. As his hand grips the gearshift, I remember how his hands felt on my skin. I’m filled with anticipation about where he’s taking me, nervous with his close proximity, and being alone with him.

  Before Brady pulls away, he turns his head to face me, his green eyes bright. “You have your license with you, right?”

  “Yes, but why do I need it?”

  He winks. “You’ll need it to get back across the border.”

  Border? We’re going to Tijuana. “Why are we going to Tijuana?”

  “You’ll see.” His eyebrows lift and his smile makes my insides warm. Just friends, I remind myself again.

  As we make our way onto the 805 Freeway, it’s uncomfortably quiet. I gaze out the window, watching the cloudless sky pass by in an endless sea of bright blue peace.

  Thinking back to what Liv said about Brady and his ex-girlfriend, curiosity gets the best of me, as it so often does, and I decide to broach the subject. “Liv told me you broke up with your girlfriend. I’m sorry, Brady.”

  His shoulders sag slightly. Don’t I know curiosity killed the cat and I should keep my nosy trap shut? The faintest hint of a smile lifts the side of his lips. “Thanks. Vanessa was pretty great.” He’s calm but doesn’t look over.

  I want him to offer more, but I should let it go. His response was sweetly candid, and the rest of it is none of my business. Liv’s nosy personality has obviously rubbed off on me like a bad rash, because I probe further. “What happened?”