The Burning Shadow (Origin Series)

by Jennifer L. Armentrout

  “I want to see what her insides look like,” Clyde responded calmly.

  My eyes peeled wide. “I’m pretty sure that’s the first statement every serial killer makes when caught.”

  Clyde gave me a toothy grin.

  All righty then.

  “In another life, Clyde was a doctor.” Luc looked at me over his shoulder. “He’s actually pretty skilled at all things cutting and slicing.”

  That last statement wasn’t particularly reassuring.

  “When Luxen and Arum die, they revert back to their true forms. Both look like … shells. Their skin becomes translucent; one is light, the other is dark.” Luc tilted his head to the side. “Hybrids look like humans when they die. The same for Origins. We already know that she’s none of these things.”

  I held my breath.

  “But we do know that whatever she is, in death, it is not like an Origin or a hybrid,” Luc continued as he gestured at Clyde.

  “Her body is still rather warm,” Clyde explained, and I was going to have to take his word on that. With a gloved hand, he lifted her limp arm. “See these marks, looks like bruises? That’s blood pooling. It’s too soon for that to be this noticeable. Usually takes a couple of hours.” He laid her arm back down and then lifted her sweater, revealing about an inch of her stomach. There were blackish-blue pools there, too. “That’s not all.”

  Heidi swallowed thickly and squeaked, “It’s not?”

  “No.” Clyde pulled the hem of her sweater back down. “She’s … disintegrating.”

  “What?” I said.

  “Her skin is beginning to flake off and turn to what reminds me of ash or dust.” He lifted his hand and turned it over so it was palm up. There was a dusting of something pinkish white on the gloved fingertips. It looked like powder. “She appears to be rapidly decomposing.”

  “Plus her blood is different,” Grayson said. “It was almost black with a tint of blue. Looked like what Sarah vomited up and what you all said Coop’s looked like.”

  Was my blood black?

  No. My blood was red and normal looking. I’d seen it enough times to know that. But if I were like April in some way, was I going to disintegrate when I died? My skin would just … flake off? Pressure clamped down on my chest as I folded my arms across my stomach.

  “There’s a chance that there may be other things that are different about her,” Clyde continued as Luc turned, walking back to where I stood. “Tissue. Organs. So on and so forth. I got a trusted friend who’s a pathologist that can run some tests. Got to get the samples, though.”

  “Can we talk about this?” Kent asked, hands on his hips. “Because I am not happy with this happening in the kitchen. I know damn well that one of you is going to expect me to clean up, and this isn’t the America I was promised.”

  Zoe’s lips quirked as Clyde lifted the scalpel once more.

  “Nope.” I backed up, raising my hands. This was all too surreal. “I can’t be in here while you do this. I know I’ll see things I can’t unsee. I don’t need any part of this.”

  Grayson smirked, but I didn’t care. I wheeled around and walked out of the kitchen into the quiet, dimly lit hall.

  “Peaches?” Luc was right behind me, and I kept walking. I wasn’t sure where I was going, but I was near the bar when he appeared in front of me, moving too fast for me to track. “Hey,” he said, placing his hands on my shoulders. “Where’s your head right now?”

  “Right now?” I laughed. “Um, I’m just hoping I don’t flake away when I die, but then again, I’d be dead, so I guess I wouldn’t care.”

  “You’re not going to flake away.”

  “Well, we really don’t know that, do we?”

  His hands drifted to my hips. “Look, there is something going on with you. I’m not denying that, but things don’t add up right now.” His hands tightened, and then he lifted me onto the bar. “We don’t know anything at this point, so let’s not focus on the whole death thing.”

  Swallowing, I nodded as I heard the doors open from the hallway. A few moments later, we were joined by Heidi and Zoe and Grayson.

  Noting how Luc was standing between my legs, his hands on my hips, Heidi lifted a brow and pursed her lips.

  I was so going to be having a conversation with her later, too.

  “So, what’s the deal?” Zoe asked, leaning against the bar. “What happened in the bathroom with April?”

  Luc looked up at me, his eyes searching mine. “You want to talk about this now?”

  I nodded, knowing this was something that needed to be said now rather than later. So I started to tell them everything, and while I talked, Luc stayed by my side, his presence oddly comforting.

  “She had pictures of the real Evie—the ones that were taken from my mom’s photo album. I thought Micah had done it, but it was April,” I explained, rubbing my hands over my knees. “But she doesn’t know that I’m really … Nadia.”

  “Wait. What?” Everything about Grayson turned rock solid.

  I cut a quick glance to Luc. He was watching his friend closely. “I’m really Nadia Holliday. I was given the Andromeda serum and, well, it’s a long freaking story, but I don’t have memories of my time as Nadia.”

  “You’re the Nadia?” he demanded, unfolding his arms.

  “She is,” Luc answered.

  Luc spoke only two words, but they seemed to blast through Grayson like a cannonball. The Luxen took a step back as he stared at Luc. “How could you not tell me?”

  “Zoe knew because she knew Evie before.” Luc’s voice was low, calm. “The only other people who knew were the ones who’d met her before. Daemon and Dawson. Archer. Clyde. No one else needed to know. It would be too much of a risk. Still is a risk.”

  Grayson blinked as if something had come too close to his face. He looked like he was going to say something, but closed his mouth, shaking his head.

  A long moment passed, and then Grayson said, “I should’ve known.”

  Luc inclined his head. “Would it have changed anything?”

  I wasn’t sure what Luc meant by that question, but if he meant if Grayson knowing I was Nadia would’ve made him nicer to me, I was going to go with a big, fat no. Grayson didn’t answer, though. He looked away, a muscle spasming along his jaw.

  Luc turned to me and said softly, “Go on.”

  I told them the rest, leaving nothing out, but the Luxen kept snagging my attention. Grayson looked furious. Sapphire eyes narrowing with each passing second, lips thinning and jaw hardening.

  Part of me couldn’t blame him for being angry.

  He’d watched me for years on Luc’s orders, and I thought he might hate me for that, but he never knew I was Nadia—the Nadia.

  Still didn’t give him a pass for saying I was useless.

  When I finished, Zoe and Heidi stared at me like I’d grown a third eye in the center of my forehead and was winking at them with it.

  “I know all this sounds impossible, but it’s true,” I finished. “Everything is.”

  Zoe shoved a hand over her head, gathering curls and pulling them back. “I don’t think anything is impossible. Not after seeing firsthand what the Daedalus is capable of. But this is really out there.”

  Grayson still looked pissed, but he asked, “You have this key fob thing?”

  “I do.” Luc reached into his pocket and pulled it out. “Haven’t seen anything like this that can do what it did to Evie. I’m hoping maybe Daemon or one of the others has some insight. I’ll get a message to them.”

  I glanced at the fob in his hand, easily recalling the pain. “She pressed that button, and that was it. Pain—and then I turned into the Terminator.”

  “What happens if you push it again?” Grayson asked.

  My gaze shot to him, eyes narrowing. “Besides it feeling like I’m being stabbed over and over in the head?”

  “Yeah, besides that.” Dryness seeped into his tone.

  “We’re not hitting it again,” Luc
replied, his fingers curling over the fob.

  “What if hitting it again does something? Gives her back more memories and turns her into the Terminator again?” Grayson shot back.

  “And what if it causes her more pain? Hurts her?” Luc lowered his hand, fingers still closed around the fob.

  “Or what if it does nothing?” Grayson challenged. “Knowing that tells us something.”

  “No.” Luc shook his head.

  “How could pressing it and it doing nothing to Evie tell us something?” Zoe asked.

  “I don’t know why we’re still having this conversation.” Luc crossed his arms.

  “Well, it could tell us that whatever that thing did—the Cassio Wave—it’s unlocked whatever code April claims was in the serum. It would tell us that at least we don’t have to worry about someone else hitting the button again and doing God knows what to her.”

  Zoe looked thoughtful, and …

  Dammit.

  “He has a point,” I said. “If it does something or not, it does give us some answers.”

  Luc turned to me, his expression stark. “Not going to happen.”

  “Luc—”

  “There is no way anyone is pushing a button that could possibly cause you debilitating pain.”

  “Maybe it won’t, though.” I gripped the edge of the bar top. “Look, I don’t want to feel the pain again, but it’s a risk—”

  “That I’m not willing to let you take.”

  Irritation pricked along my skin. “But I’m willing to take it.”

  He cocked his head. “Is there anything about my words or my stance that gives you the impression that this is going to happen? So, let’s change the subject.”

  “It’s my choice, Luc.”

  “And it’s also my choice to stop you from making stupid choices,” he retorted.

  I hopped off the bar top. “You do not get to make a choice over what I do and do not do with my body.”

  “Oh no. Don’t even try that argument.” He faced me. “That’s apples and oranges. This isn’t about your right to do as you damn please. This is about me stopping you from potentially hurting yourself.”

  “I agree with Luc. We could find something out by hitting the button, but we also don’t know what it will do,” Heidi spoke up. “Because we also don’t know if hitting that button will strip your memories on a more long-term basis. So, I don’t think we should do it.”

  I crossed my arms. “Not helping.”

  “Sorry,” Heidi muttered. “But that’s my two cents.”

  Taking a long, slow breath, I tried a different route. “What if it gives me back more memories—memories of who I used to be? That’s worth the risk. Do it. Hit the button. It’s the only way.”

  “Nothing is worth the risk of seeing you hurt. Not even you remembering every damn second of what it was like to be Nadia.” His chin dipped, and his voice lowered. “I know you want to feel useful. That you want to prove that you can help us—help yourself—but this is not the way.”

  I stilled.

  Grayson cursed under his breath. “Forget it,” he said. “It was a shit idea.”

  “Yeah.” Luc slipped the fob in his pocket. “It was.”

  “No, it wasn’t!” Shaking my head, I turned around and leaned against the bar. “I get that you don’t want to see me hurt—”

  “Or worse,” he interjected. “We don’t even know what the Cassio Wave truly is. What it really means when it gets in there and scrambles shit around in your head. Until we learn more about what it is and what it does, we need to hold off on randomly pushing buttons.”

  “Going to also have to side with Luc here.” Zoe rested her elbows on the bar. “I think we should wait until we know more.”

  Of course, they also had a point. Frustrated, I folded my arms. “And what am I supposed to do while we wait?” All those important things Luc and I needed to discuss, but I had pushed to the side earlier, came to the surface. “Can I go to school? Do I even go home? If April was with the Daedalus or some other group, they’re going to realize she’s missing, maybe dead, and then what? She talked like they knew I existed.”

  “I’m not sure you’re ready for this conversation, Peaches.”

  I wasn’t, but that didn’t mean we shouldn’t have it. “I need to get ready, because tomorrow is going to be here sooner than later, and then what?”

  “You can’t go near a RAC drone. Not until we can test one out. So, school is out of the question until then.”

  I think I’d already known that the moment I saw my black-and-white eyes in the mirror, but still, it was a gut punch. What if I couldn’t go back? Ever? What if I couldn’t graduate?

  “You know, we could just put her in contacts,” Grayson said, and my gaze shot to him. “No one would know the difference.”

  “He’s right, but it’s not safe there for you,” Luc said, taking a step toward me. “Not until we know more.”

  I knew what more meant. If it really was the Daedalus behind everything. If they were now going to come for me. But if school wasn’t safe, was my home?

  Was my mom?

  A shudder racked me, because all afternoon I’d been trying not to think about her—think about whether she knew that there was something in that serum, if she had been lying all along. I looked up and found Luc’s gaze fastened to mine.

  “None of this … this doesn’t make sense,” Heidi said, twisting a strand of red hair. “You’re human—I mean, yeah, the whole serum thing, but you’re human. The RAC drone has never hit on you—”

  “And it’s never hit on April,” Zoe cut in, her brows furrowed.

  “Could April have been wearing contacts then?” Heidi suggested.

  “I guess we’ll find out if Clyde pops her eyeballs out,” Grayson answered.

  I curled my upper lip. “I saw her eyes change.”

  “April wearing contacts before or not doesn’t explain anything. You’ve bled red. You haven’t turned into a half-smoke creature,” Heidi pointed out, and I nodded, because both were true. “I just don’t get it. How in the world did you go from tripping over air to taking April out like a trained hit man?”

  I pursed my lips. “That’s a good question.”

  “Can a serum do all of that?” Heidi turned to Luc.

  “None that I know of. Serums can mutate, but they don’t turn you into a martial arts specialist five seconds later,” Luc answered.

  Zoe pushed away from the bar top, and as her gaze met mine, I had to think she was considering the same thing I was.

  Those missing summer months I had no real memory of. What if I hadn’t been in the house? I thought about how I’d handled that gun in April’s house. The male voice I’d heard. What if?…

  I couldn’t even bring myself to finish the thought, because how could it be possible? How could I be trained and then all memory of that be wiped? How could a sound wave unlock that?

  And how in the hell was my mother not involved?

  “You asked me … if I knew why Sylvia gave you Evie’s life, and I told you I didn’t,” Luc said into the silence.

  I stiffened. He didn’t know I’d talked to her about this. I hadn’t a chance to tell him with everything that had happened.

  “I wanted to believe it was because she missed this other girl. The heart, even a Luxen’s, can make people do crazy things. But I never could make myself believe it,” he went on, his purplish gaze latching on to mine. “When you asked me if I knew where you were the summer after you were healed, I didn’t lie. I wanted to believe that you were there, inside those walls, being taken care of. I had to believe that at the time.”

  A chill swept through me, and I felt all the eyes on us.

  “You want to know why I don’t trust her? It’s because of this. Right here. Right now. I may not know what was done to you, but there’s one person who has to. That’s Sylvia.”

  26

  My house was empty when Luc and I showed up an hour later, which made sense s
ince school had just gotten out. Mom wouldn’t be back for at least three more hours, and that was if she came home on time.

  “Did you text her?” Luc asked as he followed me in, carrying my backpack and my new camera.

  I nodded. “I tried calling, but it went straight to voice mail.” Nervous energy buzzed through me as I went into the kitchen. “That’s normal, but I texted her, telling her I needed to talk to her and that it was an emergency.”

  “Perfect.”

  “You know, I haven’t seen her since … the day before yesterday,” I realized as I opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water. “Want one?”

  Luc stood in the doorway, shaking his head.

  “I mean, she’s been working so late. You know that, so that’s not all that suspicious, but…” I shut the door, turning to him. “You’re going to be mad at me.”

  “Doubtful.”

  I shuffled over to him. “I talked to her the morning after Heidi was hurt, about … about the summer before I started school. I know you said that you wanted to be there, but I…”

  “Couldn’t wait?” He started walking backward. Shaking my head, I gave him a bashful smile as I followed him. “What did she say?”

  “Not much. She thought you said something to me and then asked what you told me.”

  His gaze sharpened as we reached the stairs. “Of course she did.”

  I started up the steps. “I told her it was something that came up in conversation with Zoe, and she told me that I was here, but I wasn’t suitable for going out in public. That some days I didn’t remember anything, not even that I was Evie, and others I was fine. And I asked her why she did it—giving me Evie’s memories.” We rounded the landing, and I knew Luc was substantially slowing his steps so I could keep up with him. “She said what she’d told me before. That she missed the real Evie.”

  Luc was quiet as we walked into my bedroom, placing my bag by the desk and the camera on it. Then he spoke. “Do you believe her?”

  Not ready to speak those words, I walked over to the bedside table and put the bottle on the stand, next to Diesel. Picking up the remote, I turned on the TV, keeping the volume low. “I…”

  “You don’t have to answer the question.” He sat on the bed, resting his arms on his thighs.