The Ocean Between Us (Benton Creek Series Book 1)

by Delisa Lynn

  “I was about five or six months, and you wouldn’t respond to my letters and he said you told him that you didn’t want anything to do with me!” I cry out. “I had no choice once you ignored me.”

  His jaw clenches. “Pardon me? He what? He’s the one that told me you’d moved on with him and were pregnant with his child.”

  “He wouldn’t have…” I wrap my arms around myself, feeling like I’m a million miles away from everyone I know. “No, Jason wouldn’t have lied like that. He loves me.” My lips quiver. I don’t even notice that Quaid’s walked away already.

  He’s walked away from me, again.

  “Here’s your inhaler. I better go referee, he’s going to kill Jason.” Gemma squeezes me tight. “Stay here, I’ll be back.”

  He knows. He finally knows the truth.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The Truth Eventually Comes Out

  Quaid

  I have a daughter. A daughter with Hendlee. Walking back into the bar, my eyes land on the scumbag. He knows I’ve found out. He throws his arms up in surrender and starts to speak. My fist goes directly to his face. I’m not sure how many times I punch him. I feel Clive pulling me off of him and I look down and see that Jason’s face is covered in blood and his body is limp. He’s pleading for me to stop.

  “Now you want me to leave you alone? You’ve played house with my family all this fucking time. You lied to me. I thought we were friends, I guess that was a lie too.” I kick at him as Clive pulls me back. I’m a lot bigger than both of them, but I see that he’s hurt, so I back away.

  “Quaid,” Clive urges, “back up, man, you got the best of him.”

  “He’s a lying bastard,” I spit out. “He stole my family, so that means he got the best of me.”

  “Say what? You’ve been gone for five years, man. Hendlee’s daughter is…holy fucking shit!” He got it. “Damn it, I knew she had your eyes.”

  “Yeah, holy fuck is right. Seems I have a daughter that this sack of shit has been passing off as his. He and Hendlee both knew.” Clive pushes me down into a chair. Gemma is at my side with some ice. I look around and don’t see Hendlee. “Where is she?” I ask.

  “She’s still outside. She told you in letters and you never replied. Then this asshat told her you were done with her. I hate him. I knew he was up to no good.” She pats my back.

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper, not knowing if I was saying sorry about what I did, or for the loss of Bryan.

  “Hey, it’s not me that you need to win back.” She winks. “Now go calmly talk to her, Incredible Hulk. But be gentle. She’s fragile, my friend. I found her inhaler, she may need to use it a few more times. Make sure she hangs onto it.”

  I look over and see that Clive has Jason and I can’t hear what they are saying. I don’t care. I walk outside and find Hendlee leaning against the truck I saw in her yard earlier today.

  “I told you in the letters. I told you how much I loved you and that the baby and me would be waiting for you.” She wipes her face. “Waiting for you to come and get us. I never wanted anyone other than you. You were my everything. I would’ve given anything for you to have been there when Bristol was born. She looks like you. She has your eyes. I’m surprised your parents haven’t noticed yet. Every time we see them. I’d wish they would figure it out.”

  “Why didn’t you tell them? Why keep it from them too?” I step closer to her and embrace her.

  “I was scared, and Jason said you wanted nothing to do with me. Since you hadn’t responded to the letters, I believed him. I had no clue he would lie, to me or to you.”

  “I’m so sorry, Hend…so fucking sorry.” I sigh. “Bristol, huh?”

  She lifts her face up. “Yeah, Bristol Shaide.”

  “After me and Gemma Shay.”

  “Yes. After my two best friends.”

  I ask the question of the hour. “Does she think he’s her dad?”

  “No. She knows her dad is in the Navy and she’s seen pictures of you.”

  “I don’t want to confuse her, but I want to meet her. My girlfriend is at my parents’ house.” Hendlee goes stiff. Up until this point Nicola has been the furthest thing from my mind.

  “Will you take me to get Bristol now? She’s at Jason’s sister’s.”

  “Of course. Should we tell them?” I nod toward the bar.

  “No, I don’t want to look at Jason.” She looks into my eyes. “Please don’t hate me. She will love you. I told her that you are in the Navy and that’s why you haven’t been around.”

  “We’ll talk about everything else later. Is it too late to pick her up?”

  “It’ll be okay, she’s a night owl.” Her eyes dip. “What about your girlfriend? What will she think?”

  “She’ll have to be okay with it. I’m not running from my child. I’m very upset that I’ve missed out on all this time. We can’t get those years back. We can make new memories though. Nicola loves kids, I know she’ll love Bristol as much as she does me.”

  “So y’all are in love?” she asks meekly.

  “I love her, and she loves me. Is she you? No, but I thought you’d moved on. I thought you were having someone else’s child. That doesn’t mean I stopped loving you.”

  “This is such a cluster fuck. I lay awake and cried that whole night because Jason told me you didn’t want me. I have given him almost all of me the last four and a half years. And now I find it’s all been a lie.” She looks out the window. “Make a left near the old post office.”

  “I’m so sorry. I should’ve opened those letters. Why didn’t you tell my parents? If you knew you were having my baby, they could’ve helped you. I know that having a kid is expensive. What about health insurance, life insurance, and money in general?”

  “Jason said you had moved on and wanted nothing to do with me, and I knew that telling your parents would’ve made it harder on me. If you didn’t want us, why would they? I’m not poor. I’m still living off of my parents’ inheritance.”

  I stop once we reach the small house. “Did you tell them we were on our way?”

  “No, she’ll know when I go knock on the door.” She opens the door and looks back at me. “I’ll be back. This will be easier if I’m alone.”

  “I’ll be right here if you need me.” I climb out and stretch my legs. This rent-a-car is small and I stand at six-foot-three.

  Pulling out my phone, I send a quick text to Nicola letting her know that some things have happened and it’ll be a long night. The front door swings open and Jason’s sister walks out with Hendlee and Bristol. Hendlee hugs her tight and as she steps off the porch, she picks up the prettiest little girl I’ve ever seen. She walks slowly to me. I rub my palms down the front of my jeans, wiping away any sweat and blood that’s on them. As they get closer, I see the little girl smiling.

  “Bristol, this is your daddy I told you about. Remember he has been sailing around the world?”

  My lips curl up and I reach my arms out to her. “Hi, sweetheart. I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to meet you.” Tears well in my eyes.

  “You’re tall.” She giggles. “Is this your car?” She goes from Hendlee’s arms to mine. I envelop her in my arms and kiss the top of her head. Her hair is a dark brown and she has two curly pigtails.

  “Yeah, I’m tall like your granddad. No, this isn’t my car. I have a truck at my parents’ house and I have a few cars back in Chicago where I live.” It all comes out in a low tone, as the emotion is lodged in my throat.

  “Cool. How come you live in Chicargo and Jason lives wif us?” She tilts her little head and her eyes meet mine. They’re the same color as mine. Whiskey brown.

  “Well, I have been working in Chicago. That’s why I haven’t been back.”

  “Momma showed me pictures of you. Are you coming to our home?”

  “Sure. How about we put your seat in the back and then we can get going?” I pick the booster seat up from the gravel.

  “Momma, why are you crying?” B
ristol asks Hend. I look up and see the emotion that I’m holding in on her face.

  “I’m just happy you get to meet Quaid, sweetie. I told you, you have his eyes.”

  “Yep. Can we get ice cream?” Bristol asks me.

  “It’s a little late tonight. We will tomorrow, if that’s okay with your mommy.” I place her in the seat and buckle her in.

  “Momma, does Jason know I have a Quaid here now?” Bristol jabbers.

  My heart tightens. She admires that piece of shit that’s stolen the years of my life with my daughter and the woman I was supposed to marry. I push the anger back and bite my tongue. Hendlee Ann clears her throat, but nothing comes out. As I click my seatbelt, she places her hand on mine. She doesn’t have to say anything. Her eyes say it all. Sadness takes over her beautiful hazel eyes.

  “Sweetie, Jason had to go out of town. He won’t be back for a while,” Hend lies to our daughter. “Some things have changed and he’ll be moving out of our house.” She wipes the tears from her face.

  “Okay. Can Quaid move in with us?” Bristol’s little voice begs from the back.

  “Baby, Quaid has a home in another state. He can’t move here with us.”

  “Why not? He’s my daddy and daddies are supposed to live with their princesses.” Her eyes go wide. “I am still the princess, right?”

  I have to hold in my laughter. Her voice is the cutest and the expression is priceless. “Yes, sweetheart, you’re still the princess.” I wink at her.

  “Sheww, thank goodness. Well, can you stay all night with us? I can show you my room and all my toys.”

  “I’ll stay as long as I can,” I tell her, knowing that Nicola is at my parents’ and I can’t just stay out all night.

  “Cool. Did you know that pink is my favorite color? I know boys don’t like pink. Momma says you drive a big ship, and it sails through the ocean.”

  “Pink is a cool color.” I chuckle. “I have sailed on a ship and lived on one. Have you ever seen them on TV?”

  “Nope. Momma says that you and her used to go to the lake. We go all the time.”

  Hendlee stares out the window silently the whole time.

  The rest of the drive, I listen to Bristol jabber in the back seat. She sure is full of spunk, which she gets from me. When we pull into the driveway of Hendlee’s house, I see the nervousness in her. The old Buick is still parked by the garage, and the house looks a lot older and more worn than it did last time I was here.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Everything Changes

  Hendlee

  Quaid walks Bristol and me in the house. I know he’s pissed at me, and I am ready to kill Jason. This is entirely his fault. I just don’t get why Quaid wouldn’t open the letters. How could I’ve been so dumb to not even tell his parents? I’ve been passing his child off as someone else’s. Our daughter has missed out on so much, and now she is going to be so confused. Though she has always known about Que, things have changed. He is here, and with his girlfriend. While I knew he would eventually move on, my heart is breaking knowing how much I’ve hurt him. The pain that I’ve caused by listening to someone else.

  I look around my house. It’s full of Jason’s shit. I want to burn it all and throw the ashes in his face. It’ll have to wait until after Bryan’s service. I have to keep calm for my best friend.

  Que and Bristol are sitting on the couch, her on his knee, telling him a story about the lake. She loves to go to the lake. It’s at his grandparents’ farm, and she and I always go there. I have told her stories of going there when I was a child.

  “Momma, I’m tired,” Bristol whines, rubbing her eyes.

  “Let’s get you in some jammies.” I look over at Que. “Maybe your daddy will help me tuck you in, would you like that?”

  Her eyes dart to his. “Please, Daddy, can you tuck me in?”

  His lips turn up in a smile, though I also see the hint of sadness in his eyes.

  “Sure, baby girl. I need to make some phone calls, so while you’re changing, I’ll do that then help tuck you in.” He picks her up and kisses her forehead. She giggles and wraps her arms around his neck.

  Walking ahead of the two of them toward the stairs, I say a silent prayer that I can get through this. I know the phone call he needs to make is to his woman. The one he is going to leave Bristol and me for, to go back to.

  Get it together, Hendlee.

  I need a drink. Or five. This night has been a disaster.

  I turn the light on in Bristol’s room, and Quaid takes in the surroundings of the pink castle themed room.

  He sets her on the bed. “This room is perfect for a princess.” She giggles as he pinches the tip of her nose.

  “I’m going to step out and make some calls while you change, okay?”

  “Sure, we’ll be right in here.” I go over to the dresser, digging around for some pajamas.

  Leaning in so only I can hear him, Quaid says, “We aren’t done talking. A bunch of shit will be straightened out tonight.”

  He walks away, and I can still smell him, that scent that I’ve missed all these years. He closes the door and then I can hear him on the phone. Calling her.

  “I want to wear my polka dot jammies.” Luckily those are the ones that I pulled from the drawer.

  “Sure thing. Let’s get you changed and in the bed. It’s late, and I am pretty sleepy myself.”

  That’s no lie, I am exhausted. I think my mind more than my body, but right now this little girl is the only reason why I am staying sane in this fucked up situation.

  “When is Jason coming back?” Bristol asks, intertwining her fingers with mine after she is under the blanket. “Are you mad at him, Momma?”

  I should have anticipated she would know something is up. She is the smartest kid I know.

  “It’s grownup stuff, nothing for you to worry about. Okay?”

  “Yeah. Can we get ice cream tomorrow?”

  I almost fall off the bed laughing. My hands dart to her belly to tickle her, making her giggle loudly.

  “Yes we can, silly girl. You need to go to sleep. I’ll ask Quaid to come over tomorrow too.”

  He’s been out in the hall for a good ten minutes now, and I think it’s best Bristol just goes to sleep.

  He opens the door right then. “Hey, princess. You’re all tucked in. You ready to fall asleep?” He sits on the side of the bed.

  She yawns and rubs her eyes. “We’re getting ice cream tomorrow.”

  Quaid chuckles and places his hand on hers. “Yes, sweetheart, we will. What’s your favorite flavor?”

  Bristol places her finger on her chin, as if she seriously has to think about this. “Chocolate with sprinkles.”

  Leaning in so he’s whispering, Quaid says, “Chocolate is my favorite too. I think we’ll need extra sprinkles.”

  “Yay! I better go to sleep now. Then when I wake up, we can go?” Her eyes go from his to mine, waiting for one of us to reply.

  “Yes, Bristol. Now get some sleep, and we’ll talk tomorrow.”

  “Love you, Momma.” She kisses my cheek.

  “Love you too, princess.” I stand, flip her night light on, and almost fall over when I hear her next words.

  “Thank you for coming back to meet me, Daddy. I love you and someday I want to see the ocean between us.”

  I choke back the tears and swallow the lump that’s lodged in my windpipe.

  “I love you too, sweetie. I promise that no one, not even that ocean, will keep us apart ever, ever again.” He kisses her little cheek and she melts into a hug.

  She snuggles to her stuffed lamb. “Night!”

  ***

  I grab two beers from the fridge and hand one to Quaid, who sits on the couch. I look at my phone and see that Jason has called fifteen times. I throw my phone back in my purse; no way I am ready to speak to him. I need to sit on my thoughts for a few days. I take in the view of the man that’s on my couch. He looks so different than he did the last time I saw him. His hair
is shorter, he has more tattoos, and his body…well, it’s perfect. Surely he works out daily.

  “I want to know everything, and what he told you to keep you from me. Jason sent me a letter after I had been gone maybe three months. He said that you two had gone on a date with the rest of the crew and hit it off, that you didn’t want me to contact you at all. I was so mad at him…and you. Every letter I received from you or him after that, I didn’t open it.” He runs his hand down his leg. “Then Clive said you were pregnant with Jason’s baby. I was crushed that you let that fucker touch you, Hendlee,” he growls. “You were mine. And the thought of his nasty hands on you sent me over the edge. I went to my commander and informed him I wanted to sign on for commander classes.”

  “It’s so weird…I did go out with him, but we were also with Gemma, Bryan, and Clive. When we went fishing, we were with them as well.” I tuck my legs under me on the sofa. “I tried avoiding him, but he wouldn’t go away and then he said that you didn’t want anything to do with me. My letters were unanswered and the calls stopped. I was so confused. You were my best friend, my first and only love. The first time I slept with him, I was drunk…he isn’t who I wanted.”

  “Hurt doesn’t even explain how I felt. I was pissed for so long. That’s the whole reason why I never came back. I focused on getting where I wanted to be. I met Nicola and honestly, I wasn’t looking for love. It just happened.” He takes a swig of his beer.

  “You love her?”

  “Yeah, I do, and I’m not sure what’s going to happen now…now that I have a child.” He closes his eyes and sits back on the couch. “I will not miss out on the rest of Bristol’s life. I’ve missed too much as it is and she thinks that fucker is a goddamn saint.”

  “I don’t expect you to drop your life and run back to this shithole town, Quaid. We will be fine without you.”