When You're Gone

by Marguerite O'Callaghan

  ‘Sorry to keep you waiting, gentlemen. I’ve got two sword swallowers and a gymnast dwarf up here waiting to get paid.’

  Tony laughs loudly at the picture he has painted for these straight-looking detectives. He likes to shock. That never stops, not even when a police investigation is going on. He walks slowly and carefully down the stairs. The man certainly has presence, and this is not the first time his club has been under a magnifying glass, so he’s not daunted by the thought of it happening again. In fact, the media coverage will be welcome; spring and summer are the quietest months and profits are always low. People’s kinks and fetishes always seek a hiding place at Haven in the dark winter months, and often shy away in the light of the sun.

  Tony shakes hands with his guests and offers them a coffee. Davies is staring, almost open-mouthed at him, as he shakes his head slowly from side to side without uttering a sound. To him, Tony looks like a vampire, with pale skin, gaunt frame and white spiked hair. He’s wearing leather trousers and a shirt that seems to be made from thin grey rope, tied together in a series of intricate knots. Around his neck hang several silver spikes, chains and what looks like a bird claw. Over the top of the outfit, Tony is wearing a long leather coat; a look he’s now famous for.

  He’s a walking advertisement for the alternative, hedonistic side of London and has been for almost two decades. He lives and breathes fetish, fantasy and escape and he reminds Davies of a character from ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’. He’s a show man: flamboyant, sharp, highly entertaining, and most people will never have met anyone like him. He makes you feel like you’re privy to something special and witness to a world that’s forbidden, exciting and wild.

  Tony offers the men a tour, and they willingly follow him around the main room and stage area, passing two large cages as they do.

  ‘That’s where we keep the really naughty ones.’

  Tony announces this with an exaggerated wink and goes on to say that the club has a total capacity for two thousand people, with about eight hundred in the main room, alone. They follow him upstairs to the gallery space and VIP area with its extravagant black and gold walls, glass table-tops, and huge chandeliers. It’s divided into sections, with one area for performance, another for viewing the massive dance floor below, and another for table dancing, complete with poles and mirrored walls. McCarthy spots a pink neon sign at the other side of the gallery that reads ‘Play Room’. He points at it and asks to have a look.

  Tony claps his hands and almost skips towards the entrance. ‘The best bit!’ he announces as he pushes the heavy doors open and disappears inside.

  The ‘Play Room’ smells strongly of leather and talc, and is basically a sound-proofed dungeon; a space for those who like sadomasochism to indulge their desires in front of a small audience.

  Davies has never seen anything like it, and he walks slowly and cautiously from one strange-looking contraption to another. It looks a bit like gym equipment to him, except with wrist and ankle ties, and he wonders how there can be so many different ways to tie someone up.

  ‘Is this for torturing people, then?’ he asks Tony, all of a sudden. It’s the first thing he’s said to this guy since they arrived and McCarthy winces upon hearing his partner’s annoying voice. Trust him to make them both look like amateurs.

  Tony leans on a piece of wooden furniture that looks like something between gym horse and gallows, and with a wry smile he tells Davies that the play room is for ‘whatever he fancies’.

  He winks again, making Davies blush this time, then proceeds to parade around the room showing off the new flogging area and equipment. He always gets a kick out of flirting with straight people. It was just too easy.

  ‘You might think of this place as dark and seedy, but it’s far from it, gentlemen. I run a professional business and everything here is top of the range, clean, monitored and managed. I look after my guests and my staff. I watch them, closely. Here, no-one gets hurt more than they want to get hurt and nothing happens here that I don’t know about. And that includes your missing girl.’

  Tony had already been questioned briefly by police a couple of days after Kate went missing. As soon as her family had reported her disappearance they said they believed she was headed to Haven on Friday night, so police had made contact with the club.

  Tony had told them he would help in any way he could, and when they said they’d send through a photograph of Kate, he agreed to pass it on to the staff that were working that night. He recognised her, but couldn’t be sure if it was through the club, or because he had seen one of her modelling campaigns at some point. Yesterday, they sent an officer around who told Tony they had CCTV from the front gates that showed Kate entering the club, and they needed access to any security system he had in place there, too. Tony had handed over everything he had, but now these guys were here looking at him like he had her tied up in the basement.

  McCarthy asks if they can take a look at the security system, or any cameras they have, and Tony tells him the same thing he told the other officers; they don’t have any internal cameras, only external ones, and police already have copies of all footage from the front door and the two fire exits. He also tells them that he was working himself on Friday night and saw and heard nothing out of the ordinary. When they closed, he even sat and had a drink with everyone who worked that night, apart from the bar staff who had gone home at that stage. No-one had reported anything unusual.

  McCarthy believes Tony, but this does not help in any way. If there were no cameras at Haven that night, they would have to rely solely on finding people who saw Kate with their own eyes.

  They also needed to go through the camera footage with a fine-tooth comb in case she slipped out one of the exits with a crowd.

  Before they leave, McCarthy and Davies take photographs of every bit of the club and ask Tony for the floor plans. He hands them a copy and also gives them a training manual as well as a list of all the staff members that were on the rota for that night. Tony has highlighted the manager of each department, and says he’s told everyone there’s an investigation going on, so it won’t be a surprise to any of them if they’re contacted. Tony seems genuinely interested in helping, and concerned for Kate.

  ‘She is an absolutely gorgeous girl. And so very young. I can’t imagine what her family are going through. I really hope she turns up soon.’

  As they’re shaking hands at the front door, McCarthy lets Tony know they will likely have to do a full search of the venue, and he’ll be in touch with details in the next few hours.

  Once outside, the men are glad to see daylight. McCarthy squints into the bright grey sky, and tells Davies to drive the car back to the station.

  ‘I’ll take the train. It’s faster. I need to go home for an hour or so. Keep me posted if anything happens and DO NOT turn your phone off or go to the pub, okay?’

  McCarthy wants to make it home before his children’s bed time, and calls Fran to let her know he’ll be there in twenty minutes.

  6

  The next morning, Davies shows Brian and Barbara Stone into his office. It’s now been six days since their daughter went missing.

  The CCTV footage of Kate going into Haven is on a laptop in the corner of the room and as soon as they see it, Brian and Barbara rush over. Barbara is convinced that she will be able to see something the police have missed. McCarthy puts a reassuring hand on her shoulder and nods at Brian before leaning over to press play.

  The black and white footage jumps about a bit and isn’t easy to decipher. For a minute or two, they all watch the screen as people arrive at Haven, walk the short distance from the gates to the entrance, and show their tickets to the door staff.

  The time code on the screen reads 23.17, when Kate appears and walks quickly towards the entrance. She’s wearing a long black coat and her favourite Vivienne Westwood heels. Barbara lets out a gasp when she sees her and moves closer to the screen.

  ‘Why isn’t t
here any sound? Can we zoom in, please?’

  McCarthy leans forward, pauses playback for a moment, and takes the time to explain to both of them that their digital team have done everything they can to make the image as clear as possible, but no sound exists for the footage. Barbara nods in understanding, asks him to play the rest, and they continue to watch as Kate joins the short queue outside the club, shows her ticket at the door, and walks inside. There’s a brief moment when she looks behind her as the man checks her ticket. And that’s it.

  It’s undeniably her, but there’s nothing in the footage that tells them who Kate was meeting, or even what her state of mind was at the time. Brian says that he thinks it’s strange she went in alone.

  ‘Usually she has a big group, but I suppose she was meeting them inside. Whoever they are...’

  McCarthy tells the Stones that they’ve gone through all recorded activity at the club from 9PM on Friday night, to when the last person left the next morning after 5AM. Kate is simply not seen leaving through the main doors or either of the fire exits at the back. They have also retrieved CCTV from the two streets adjacent to the building, had a team go over it numerous times, and there’s no trace of her there, either.

  Davies rewinds, then pauses on the frame of Kate looking over her shoulder, and all four of them stare at it for a few seconds. Then, McCarthy asks if they have thought of anything that was troubling her.

  ‘Is there anything at all we should know about? No one had threatened her or was following her, that you’re aware of? Your family doesn’t have any known enemies or anything like that?’

  Barbara looks like she is going to faint. She tells them she needs to lie down, and within minutes, she and Brian are in the car on the way home.

  Kate’s face, frozen on screen in black and white is fresh in her mind.

  7

  Lydia is walking down a familiar path on Hampstead Heath. The turning to the duck pond is coming up on the left and she has a longing to get there quickly, so she can sit down and rest on one of the benches.

  All of a sudden, she sees someone in the distance who looks just like Kate. The girl is even wearing the same long blue parka with a fur hood that Kate liked to wear on Heath walks.

  Lydia breaks into a light jog, making her way towards the figure. After a few seconds, the reality of the situation sinks in, the fact that Kate has been gone for nearly a week. Lydia frantically shouts out her sister’s name and starts to run towards her as fast as she can, but she trips over a large branch and hits the hard ground.

  She immediately pushes herself to her feet and can hear Kate calling out to her now, but Lydia can’t see her anywhere. Her chest tightens in panic. She can feel hands on her and she wrestles with them as the world around her fades to black.

  Her eyes open and she sees that the hands belong to her mother.

  ‘Darling, Lydia! It’s me. You’ve had another dream.’

  8

  On Friday May 13th, Lydia gets off the bus in Hendon Central and walks the short distance to the police station. It’s now been a week since her twin sister’s disappearance and police are no closer to finding her.

  McCarthy meets her just inside the entrance and Lydia is relieved when he suggests coffee and a walk. He can see that she’s anxious, and knows the cold, male-dominated police station might not be the best place for an eighteen-year-old girl to feel relaxed or able to open up.

  As they walk down the street, McCarthy chats about his own wife and children and Lydia asks a few questions about them, like where they go to school and if they are as obsessed with iPads as every other child. She seems genuinely interested, and adds that if he ever needs a babysitter she’d be happy to help.

  McCarthy is touched by the offer. Lydia is hardly doing it for the money, he thinks. From what he knows, her family have more than they could ever even begin to spend in any of their lifetimes and most eighteen-year-olds are usually too wrapped up in their own social lives to have evenings free to babysit. On top of this, her sister is a missing person. In this moment of chaos, Lydia is still thinking of others and able to be kind. This young woman, McCarthy decides, is one-of-a-kind and the sort of person he hopes his own childen will grow up to be.

  He also realises that the first impression he got of her was wrong, and there’s definitely more to Lydia Stone than he’d previously thought. McCarthy makes a mental note of the babysitting offer and decides to think about taking her up on it when all this is sorted out and Kate is home with her family again.

  As if reading the detective’s mind, Lydia starts to tell him about her twin. For some reason, she really trusts this man and can feel how much he wants to find her sister. She starts to tell him that there are things about Kate that no-one really knows; a wildness in her and a curiosity that Lydia always feared would get her into trouble.

  Kate is a rebel and above all else she likes to break rules and push people, including herself, to the very limit. Lydia can remember feeling like there was no-one in the whole world that was more different to her than Kate, yet she was the closest to her on a biological level.

  Kate has always been the one to jump off the highest cliff into the sea, sing at a party, or talk to a stranger, whereas Lydia has always been the worrier, list-maker, and insomniac. She often wondered how two souls born on the same day to the same parents and raised together in an identical environment with the same opportunities could be so incredibly different.

  Kate kept a lot of secrets, and over the past couple of years, Lydia saw a definite change in her. She seemed preoccupied and distant. Others noticed too, and thought it was because of her modelling work and the constant stream of fashion parties, events and photo shoots she was doing. The girls’ parents thought maybe the pressure was affecting Kate more than she thought it would, and all the intense focus on her looks, weight, and clothes was unhealthy. But, Lydia sensed there was more to it, and something else was going on.

  McCarthy listens and nods in understanding, then asks about Kate’s boyfriends. This is something that’s been on Lydia’s mind, too and she tells him that Kate seemed like she was seeing someone about a year ago, when for about three months she was constantly on her phone and seemed paranoid about anyone seeing her text messages. Lydia was convinced she was in love with someone, but when she asked Kate about it she firmly denied anything and laughed it off.

  McCarthy asks if Kate could’ve been having an affair and felt she couldn’t tell anyone? Lydia shrugs her shoulders, stops walking, and looks down at the ground for a moment. McCarthy stops too and waits for her to speak.

  ‘The longer she’s gone, the more I realise I don’t know anything.’

  Tears well in Lydia’s eyes.

  ‘I’m an awful sister. I’m stupid. Stupid! How could I not know?’

  McCarthy immediately feels guilty for pushing her like this, and guides her towards the coffee shop on the corner.

  Inside, with hot chocolate and a comfy chair, Lydia apologises for being such a cry baby. She brings up Haven and tells McCarthy she knows Kate had been there a couple of times before. She’d told her a little bit about what it was like, but Lydia didn’t know who she went with, or if she knew anyone there at all. Kate had even asked Lydia to go with her once, but when she saw one of the promotional videos with almost-naked cage dancers and people wearing masks and hoods, Lydia was terrified. It didn’t surprise her that Kate liked it at that particular club because she was such a thrill-seeker.

  Lydia blushes slightly and clears her throat before telling McCarthy that Kate had a few casual relationships too - one night stands really - with models or actors. Lydia guessed they were models and actors anyway, because they were all so good looking from the photos Kate showed her.

  McCarthy asks her to try to remember any names or details if she can. If there’s a chance that any of them were there that night, or know anything about where Kate is, they need to speak to them as soon as possible.

  Lydia
nods in understanding, says she’ll have a think, as well as take another look in Kate’s bedroom for any phone numbers or names that might help.

  McCarthy and the team are going to have access to Kate’s social media accounts soon and he tells Lydia he’ll be asking her to come into the station to go through it with him. They had found nothing out of the ordinary in her email account or on the phone she had left at home the night she went to Haven, but they are hoping there would be something on Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat or Instagram that might give them a few leads.

  ‘And what does she think about you and Simon?’

  The change of subject takes Lydia off guard. She looks confused.

  ‘You and Simon are serious. Am I right?’

  Lydia has been with Simon for over two years, even though sometimes it felt like longer than that, she tells McCarthy.

  ‘He’s just…always there, almost blends in with the furniture… and he’s consistent and makes me feel loved and secure. But he’s quiet too and has problems communicating his feelings.’

  She goes on to tell McCarthy that Kate always seems indifferent to Simon and never really said if she liked or disliked him.

  Lydia explains that Simon and Kate are very different from one another. He never goes out, and she’s a party animal. He has no friends - apart from his brother - and Kate is the most popular girl for miles around. There’s just very little common ground between them as far as Lydia is concerned.

  An hour later, when McCarthy returns to the station after saying goodbye to Lydia, he realises he needs to interview Simon as soon as possible.