Wasted Time

by Mya O'Malley

  It was time. Declan needed some companionship, and the modest cape style home that his aunt had left in her will to his family was plenty big enough for a dog. With almost an acre of fenced-in property, there was simply no excuse not to get that dog. His financial situation was fine — between his aunt’s home and the money he had been receiving from the Army, he worried little about expenses.

  Mr. Blake had been a successful contractor for the years leading up to his stroke, and his investments had left Declan and his mother quite comfortable after he had passed away. Declan wasn’t the type of man to sit back and have no purpose, and he wanted to make his father proud, believing that the man was looking down upon him. Years ago, his job in the military had given him all the satisfaction he had needed. Today, it was volunteering to help fellow disabled veterans. Still, he got lonely and a dog just might fill the void a bit.

  Without thinking about it for another minute, Declan grabbed his keys from the house and ambled over to his gray pick-up truck. Tapping on the steering wheel, Declan drove to the shelter just outside of town. It was after 3:00 on a Saturday afternoon.

  Hoping that the shelter was still open, he swung his truck into the car-filled lot, avoiding the handicapped spot as he often did. Only on days when his back or leg ached more than usual would he put the handicapped sign on his rearview mirror. Pride as usual, got in the way more often than not for Declan these days.

  The shelter sure appeared to be open. Hustling the best he could, Declan made his way to the front door just as it was opening. A woman with her young child practically slammed into him; she was gazing down at her daughter, who held a small gray kitten clutched tightly in her arms.

  “Excuse me.” The woman smiled up at Declan as the young girl began to speak.

  “Do you want to meet Lilly, my new kitty?” The little blonde-haired girl’s eyes lit up as she gazed up at him.

  Stooping just a bit so that he was leaning toward the girl, he rested his eyes on the kitten. “Lilly, you say? Well, young lady, that kitten happens to be the luckiest kitten around.”

  The girl’s eyes went wide as she nodded her head up and down. “Why, mister?”

  “Why? Because she has you and your mommy here to look after her.” Scratching the top of the kitten’s head, Declan turned to face the woman with a grin.

  His grin was met with a wink. “Thank you.” The woman’s eyes crinkled with kindness.

  “No problem. Enjoy that kitten, huh?”

  Declan turned on his heels for a brief moment to watch the girl and her mom get into their car. A feeling deep inside him stirred, one of longing. Morgan would have made a wonderful mother, and he had always wanted to become a father. He supposed it just wasn’t in the cards for him, but still hoped that it wasn’t too late for Morgan. Who knows, maybe she was well on her way there. Banishing the thoughts that threatened to squash his lightened mood, he focused on his goal, his purpose for being here.

  With a shake of his head, he walked through the front door and headed straight for the front counter. A woman was bent down, filing some papers, seemingly unaware of Declan’s presence. Waiting a moment, Declan tapped his foot and cleared his throat softly. Turning to face Declan was a young, blonde woman, somewhere in her early twenties. Catching his breath, Declan was unprepared for his gut reaction.

  “Hi, how may I help you?” The woman’s bright smile reached her striking light blue eyes.

  “I… uh, I want a dog.” I want a dog? What kind of thing was that to say?

  He sounded like a total fool. In his years, he had come across many beautiful women, but something about this one, was it the innocence of her smile? Her wholesome girl-next-door looks?

  “Well… if you’re looking for a dog then I think you’ve come to the right place.” Warmth resonated from the woman’s soft chuckle. He could feel his face starting to flush.

  “Uh… yeah.”

  “Sorry, I didn’t mean…”

  “What is your name?” Where did that come from? A flash of Morgan’s face came to mind; he instantly fought it off as he stared at the woman before him.

  “Amber. My name’s Amber.” It was her turn to blush.

  “Amber. That’s a beautiful name. I… I’m Declan.” Clearing his throat, he was surprised at his words. Was he, Declan Blake, actually flirting with a woman?

  “Declan? I don’t think I’ve ever heard that name before. What is it, Irish or something?”

  A soft chuckle escaped his lips as he went to speak. “Yes, Amber. It is Irish. It’s nice to meet you.”

  Sharp yelps could be heard from behind the door to the right of the office.

  “Come this way, Declan, and I’ll show you around.”

  Coming out from behind the desk, Amber appeared in a snug pair of dark jeans. Her build was petite; her stature couldn’t be more than five-foot-two-inches. She couldn’t have been more different in the looks department than Morgan. Morgan was five-foot-seven with dark hair and eyes.

  “Are you going to come with me, or are you just going to stand there, Declan?” Amber chided playfully.

  Moving quickly, he stumbled a bit. For the first year or so, Declan had walked with crutches, then a cane. Now, although the doctors urged him to bring the cane along, Declan more often than not opted for heading out without the cane. Maybe it was his pride, but he wanted to try to gain back some semblance of normalcy.

  She was by his side in an instant. “Are you okay?” Amber touched his arm.

  Embarrassment caused Declan to blush once more. The last thing he needed was this woman feeling sorry for him. Her gaze lingered on the scars on his forearm.

  “I’m fine.” Pulling his arm back with more force than necessary, Declan straightened himself.

  Amber’s gaze fell to the floor. The background noise filled the air. The woman stopped to study him.

  “What?”

  “I guess you didn’t hear me, I’m sorry.”

  No, she was on his right side, with all this noise he must have missed what she said. He was used to missing part of what others said to him these days.

  “I’m sorry. What did you say?”

  “I said, yes, you do seem fine. Do you mind me asking, though, what happened?”

  “What happened? Nothing happened. I just stumbled a bit is all.”

  He wasn’t one to air his dirty laundry. The less this woman found out about his heartache, the better.

  “Declan, if you don’t mind me saying, I’m a nurse and I can spot a prosthetic leg when I see one.” She maintained direct eye contact.

  This woman was certainly forthcoming. He waited a moment, gathering up his thoughts. There was something about this woman. More than that, he liked the feeling, that little twinge of a spark that he hadn’t felt in so long. But he wasn’t ready; he didn’t know if he ever would be. And she wasn’t Morgan.

  “Amber?”

  “Yes?”

  “How about we look for that dog, huh?” It didn’t go unnoticed that Amber’s expression changed in that moment. She was suddenly all business.

  “What kind of dog are you looking for?” Her eyes were straight ahead, avoiding any contact with his.

  Cursing himself for sending out the dismissive vibe, Declan figured it was for the best. He proceeded to tell her that he was looking to rescue a young dog, and he expressed that he wanted a larger breed, a retriever, a boxer, or perhaps a mutt.

  “I’m sorry, but the dogs we have right now are all older, mostly brought here because of behavioral problems. But if you check back in a few days, perhaps we’ll have a dog that fits your needs.”

  “Okay, could I leave my name and number? Would you give me a call if something comes in?”

  “Sure. Follow me out to the front desk and I’ll have you fill out some paperwork.” Amber strode ahead, head held high, straight blonde hair teasing the small of her back.

  She ran to the desk to answer the ringing telephone, and Declan listened as Amber went about answering the call, ge
ntly pushing the paperwork in front of him while motioning for him to take a seat. The sound of her voice soothed him; he could venture to guess that she was a gentle, kind soul. He was pretty good at judging people, and he felt that his first impression of Amber was sure to be correct. When she placed the receiver down at her desk, Amber avoided eye contact.

  Declan rose to his feet and shuffled over to the desk. Amber’s smile didn’t quite reach her eyes as she took the papers from his hand then spoke about calling him if they got some more dogs in. His eyes followed her mouth and he couldn’t resist. Placing a hand on her wrist, he stilled her.

  “Amber. I’m sorry if I was rude back there, it’s just…”

  “Rude? No, I was the one who was rude. My big mouth always gets me into trouble. I push too far.” Still, her gaze was averted.

  “No, you weren’t rude. It’s me. I don’t like to talk about it. I’m a private person is all.”

  An elderly man appeared then from the back room and began locking up the main door.

  “Declan, it was nice to meet you. We’re getting ready to close up here. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.”

  “Yeah, you too. Again, I’m sorry, Amber.” She stood, feet from him, nodding her head, a firm line set on her mouth.

  Glancing back once more, he then turned and walked out the door.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  THE NAGGING FEELING THAT Stephen had been trying to tell her something followed Morgan for days. Mike hadn’t brought up the night at the restaurant and Morgan couldn’t be more pleased about it. Things were back to normal, so to speak.

  Elle had been less than happy when Morgan shared how things had gone when Mike had met Stephen. Even knowing that Elle had a point, Morgan stood her ground and defended her man. Mike wanted the focus to be on their relationship now, and she could understand how feelings of jealousy could make Mike behave the way he did at times. Dismissing her thoughts of Stephen, Morgan headed out the door to work.

  Just as she was pulling into the parking lot at the school, Morgan’s phone beeped. She quickly glanced down at her cell then waited until she was in her spot and had turned the ignition off.

  Love you M- will miss you today.

  Her smile couldn’t be contained.

  Love you too, Mike. Have a good day.

  “Oh no!” Glancing at the time on her cell, Morgan cursed.

  Rushing out the door, Morgan recalled that she had scheduled a parent meeting for Thomas, one of her students. Thomas was new to her class, having moved into the district from another town. The boy had an IEP; he was a special needs student placed in her class. Thomas was doing okay academically, but some of his behaviors concerned Morgan. He was becoming increasingly agitated and physical with the other students. His mother had chosen the inclusion class to provide positive role models for her son.

  Morgan couldn’t believe that she had forgotten this meeting; it wasn’t like her to be forgetful, especially when it came to her students. She had a feeling that Thomas was suffering from problems as a result of his parents’ recent divorce and it was essential that she discuss her feelings with his mom.

  Time to get your head in the game, she scolded herself as she spied Thomas’s mom approaching the front door of the school. Plastering a smile on her face, she quickened her pace to meet up with her.

  “That’s not like you, Morgan.” Mike smoothed her hair with his fingers, attempting to soothe Morgan after she had told him of the forgotten meeting.

  It had been a hell of a day, starting with the forgotten meeting, leading right up to forgetting her umbrella and rushing out to her car after work in the torrential downpour.

  “And I swear, it was a deluge!” Morgan threw her hands up in the air, exasperated. Biting down on her lip, she tried to fight off a stress headache. “Give me some aspirin, please.”

  Mike placed two aspirin in her hand then turned to rub the small of her back. “Relax, Morgan, so you had a bad day. It happens. Was anything else on your mind? I mean, to put you in this mood?”

  “Like what?” she snapped. He wasn’t going there again, was he?

  “Calm down. I’m just asking. My God, ever since you ran into that guy the other night, you’re on edge. What gives?”

  Clenching her fists, Morgan’s pulse quickened.

  “Are you serious? I mean, really, now? This is starting to piss me off.”

  “Piss you off? Piss you off?” Mike repeated, his voice raising.

  Was he for real? Her head pounded, and she finally found her voice. “Do you want to go there? Tonight? I told you I had a bad day, so what do you do, dredge this stuff up again?” She was shouting at him, moving closer.

  “I thought we had decided that you were going to put him to rest, Morgan.”

  “We decided? We? I am the one who has to deal with mourning for my fiancé in silence, afraid to upset you…” Tears poured down her face, she let it all out.

  “Whoa… What did you just say? I’m your fiancé, dammit! And I’m so sick and tired of taking the back seat to that man. Get over it. He’s dead, dead as a fricking doornail! He’s not coming back!”

  The finality of his words, the bluntness struck her. She zeroed in on Mike in a flash, pounding his chest over and over.

  “Stop saying that! Stop it!” she wailed, covering her ears like a small child, until Mike threw his arms up in disgust.

  Once her shouting had ceased, the two stood, no words between them. She needed time to think, away from Mike. He’d pushed her too far and it couldn’t keep happening. “I think you should go home.”

  “Home? Morgan, I thought this was my home.” Mike’s eyes watered.

  Morgan turned her back on him. “It’s my house. Please leave.”

  The words rang harsh, even to her own ears. She didn’t lift her head up until she heard his footsteps retreat down the hallway to the bedroom, back down the hallway and finally, with a slam, out the front door.

  Slipping to the floor, Morgan wept into her hands, her chest heaving. What she needed was time alone, time away from Mike, and time to herself. Fingering her engagement ring, she stood, softly making her way down to the basement, to the drawer, to the box, to the ring. Gently, she removed Mike’s ring and set it to the side. Picking up Declan’s ring, she slowly slipped it onto her left ring finger. One last time.

  Amber’s face clouded his thoughts. He should go back there, check to see if any new dogs had come in. But she had said that she would call him. Denying the fact that Amber was an attractive woman was absurd. He wasn’t ready to date, but something about her pulled at him; it was difficult for him to pinpoint his exact feelings. He hadn’t felt so comfortable talking to anyone like that in a very long time.

  Tapping his fingers loudly on the kitchen table, he bit down on his lip. The hell with this, he thought. Checking his watch, he saw that if he rushed, he could still make it to the shelter before closing. Morgan had moved on with her life and maybe it was high time he did the same. He was determined to stay positive as he made the ride over to the shelter.

  Would she be here? He certainly hoped so. His heart hammered in his chest as he opened the front door. It was quieter now compared to the last time he was here. Deflation hit him as he saw a middle-aged brunette woman behind the desk.

  “Hi there, what can I do for you today?”

  Shuffling his feet, he attempted to mask his disappointment. “Um, I was looking to see if you guys have gotten any new dogs in. I was here last week and I spoke with Amber.”

  The woman shook her head slowly. “No, I don’t think we’ve gotten any new guys in since then. What type of dog are you looking to adopt?”

  The woman was filing paperwork as she spoke, eyes on her task. Declan informed her of his wishes for adoption.

  “Nope. Sorry to tell you, but we haven’t had any pups that fit the bill for your requirements in quite some time, but if you fill out some paperwork…”

  “No, I’ve already completed the paperwork. I just figured I�
��d stop by. I was in the area.”

  The woman’s eyes were still glued to her filing. She turned her back then stooped to grab a piece of paper from one of the files.

  “Is Amber here today?”

  That seemed to grab the woman’s attention. Stopping mid-task, she slowly placed her spectacles on and gazed at Declan. “No, no she’s not. I can help you with any questions you may have, though.”

  Gulping loudly, Declan stepped back. “No, I mean, it’s… Just forget it.” Didn’t Amber mention that she was a nurse? Maybe she only worked weekends.

  The woman’s face softened. “Ah, I see. I see.”

  “No, I mean, it’s nothing like that.” Heat crawled up Declan’s neck, reaching his cheeks.

  “Oh, okay. In that case, is there anything else I can help you with? Should I tell her you stopped by? What is your name by the way?” A smug grin mocked him, ever so gently.

  “No, that’ll be it. Have a nice day, ma’am.” As he turned to leave, he paused briefly. “It’s Declan. Tell her it’s Declan.”

  A broad smile lit up the woman’s face as she winked. “Nice to meet you, Declan. Will do. I’m Cathy by the way.”

  Days later, his cell rang. Glancing at the caller ID, he frowned as he didn’t recognize the number. Usually he just hit IGNORE if he didn’t know who was calling, but this time he decided to pick up the call.

  “Hi, is this Declan Blake?” The voice sounded familiar.

  “Yes, it is.”

  “Hey, Declan, it’s Amber, from the animal shelter.”

  That was where he had heard the voice before. Of course. “Hi Amber.”

  “Hey.” The pause was tangible. “So, we got this dog in today. She’s a boxer, about a year old, very affectionate and playful…”

  It sounded perfect. He was already grabbing his keys, walking faster and with more purpose than he had since Afghanistan.

  He grinned as he ended his call with Amber and headed out the door. The ride over to the shelter seemed to take forever. He raced up to a spot right by the door then slammed his truck into PARK. Taking one last glance in his rear view mirror, he swallowed loudly.