Play Only For Me: (A New Adult Romance)

by R. B. O'Brien

  “No. I’m fine. Thank you,” she said, growing a little uncomfortable. The music was loud, the air smelled sour, and Lauren thought he looked too handsome to be kind.

  “I’m Will. I live here with Stephanie and two other roommates. Are you a freshman?”

  “Yes. I am. I’m Lauren.”

  “You live in the dorms?”

  “Yes. With Beth Sanderson. You must know her. She’s friends with Stephanie?”

  “Yes. I know her. Where are you from?”

  “Connecticut.”

  “Hmmmm…”

  “What?”

  “Nothing.

  “Let me guess, richest state per capita?” she asked exasperated. Why does everyone worry so much about money around here?

  “Huh? No. It just seems like you’re a long way from home.”

  And Lauren felt stupid. Why am I so uptight? And she knew exactly why.

  “Sure you don’t want a drink?” He paused, looking up at someone standing there.

  “She doesn’t drink, Will. She doesn’t want to get her Abercrombie little jacket ruined.”

  Will stood up to take Colton’s hand in his. “What’s up, Masters?”

  “Not much.”

  “How’s the music coming?”

  “Eh. Okay, I guess. I’m hoping Angela and I can make some tonight.”

  Will chuckled at the double meaning.

  “You know what?” Lauren suddenly chimed in. “I do want a beer.”

  “Okay. Stay right here,” Will said. “I’ll be right back. You’re my guest.”

  Lauren wouldn’t look up at Colton. And then he sat next to her. “Hmmmm. Really? You’re going to go slumming?”

  “Would you just stop it? Why are you tormenting me like this? What have I done to you?”

  “Tormenting you?” He laughed hard and loud.

  “Yes, tormenting. I can’t do anything right with you. If you think I’m such a spoiled brat, a snob, why are you sitting here? Why not go back to your girlfriend?”

  “Is that what you think?”

  “Think about what? That you hate me for some reason?”

  “That she’s my girlfriend.”

  “I couldn’t care less what she is...I…”

  “ ‘cuz she’s not.”

  “Well, whatever she is…”

  Will came back with the beer, cutting them off. “I’ll be right back, Lauren.” He left to let in some of what appeared to be his friends.

  “Have you drunk before?” Colton looked at Lauren.

  “Yes. Of course,” Lauren said a bit too forcefully.

  “Okay. Well, I’ll leave you to stop tormenting you. But be careful. There might be a few guys here who’d like nothing more than to take that Abercrombie right off of you and stuff it in the trash so you can never put it on again.”

  She didn’t know what to say to that, or what he meant. Her mouth hung open slightly. And she watched him smile. He got up to leave, and she found her voice.

  “So why weren’t you in class Wednesday?” She didn’t know why she didn’t let him leave.

  “Why? Did you miss me?” He flashed that smile that made everything tighten, and she hated it.

  “No. I just don’t want to get a bad grade on our first assignment, that’s all.”

  “I see.”

  “So…Blake said we’d probably have to get together on our own time.” He had said that. But he’d also said they would be okay without doing it.

  “Did he now?”

  “Yes. He did.” She was squirming again, uncomfortable at her half-truth and decided to take a long swig of the beer. “Oh, god!” She spit it out.

  Colton laughed. “Big beer drinker I see. Just how many times have you drunk beer?”

  She didn’t answer and looked down at her wet blazer and ruined scarf.

  “I thought so,” Colton said smugly.

  She removed her scarf and looked Colton squarely in the eye as she guzzled the rest of the beer.

  He tried not to stare, but he couldn’t help himself. He wanted her to put her scarf back on, as wet from the beer as it was. Her pert breasts were overflowing from her tight top. And he was certain she had no idea. Holy fuck. Again, he felt that twitch against his thigh like he had in class with her. Could someone this naïve be for real?

  Will approached and said to Lauren, “Give me your cup. You need another.” He turned to Colton and mouthed, Holy mother fucking shit. She is hot, and walked away towards the kitchen.

  “Put your scarf back on, Lauren,” Colton said, startling Lauren.

  “What?” She looked down. “Oh. Jesus.”

  He realized she was completely unaware, embarrassed. Her tank top showed the top of her lace bra, it had fallen down so low.

  “I didn’t mean to…”

  Lauren seemed self-conscious, and he realized he probably wasn’t helping much.

  Colton passed her the scarf.

  “I can’t. It’s disgusting. Let me see if I can find Beth to go home.”

  “Just put it on, Lauren. I’ll take you home.”

  “What? No! You’ve been drinking.”

  “I’ve had like two beers, and I’ve been here for four hours. I’m fine. I’ll take you home.”

  “Really? You don’t mind? Do you want to finish the questionnaire?”

  He couldn’t help but smile at her. She was as sweet as they came. And he couldn’t help but want to be nicer to her, even though he knew it was against his better judgment. He didn’t know how to be nice.

  “Sure,” he finally said.

  “Really? So you don’t hate me?”

  “Don’t push your luck.”

  She looked up at him, and he thought that her eyes had changed to blue now, when he could have sworn that they were green just moments ago.

  “What about Angela?”

  “What about her?”

  “Well, I mean, didn’t you come with her?”

  “Nope.”

  “But…you were…I mean…you were…like…all over each other.”

  “Yeah…and?”

  “I mean, won’t she be upset if you just…leave her here all alone?”

  “She’s with her friends.”

  “Oh.”

  “And I’m just driving you home, Lauren. It’s not that big of a deal. Is it?”

  She flushed. “Right. Of course.”

  “I know you’re a freshman and don’t really know anybody. I just want to make sure you make it home in one piece. I’m not a total asshole.”

  “You’re only a partial asshole?” She giggled.

  “Yeah. Something like that.”

  He couldn’t believe how much she was growing on him, and he couldn’t fathom why. Somehow, he found her cute. He’d never met anyone like her…so sweet…so untainted. Is that even a word? He laughed. It was surprising how refreshing he found it. He didn’t think he would. He thought he’d find her to be annoying and aloof and maybe a bit holier-than-thou.

  “You’re kinda cute when you laugh like that,” she said shyly, smirking at him.

  “Oh yeah?” He couldn’t help but grin wider.

  “Yeah,” she whispered, her cheeks visibly reddening even more, the blush traveling onward, down her chest. “But I’m sure all the girls say that to you.”

  Colton shook his head and smiled at the shy girl suddenly so feisty.

  Colton wanted to leave before Will had a chance to come back. He hated to think what might become of a girl like Lauren in the hands of a guy like Will. He chuckled to himself. Like I’m any better? In fact, he knew he was a lot worse. Fuck. Why has this girl gotten under my skin?

  “Come on, Princess, let’s get you home in one piece,” Colton said as he put his hand on the lower part of her back. He thought he heard her gasp and shiver, but he wasn’t sure. He knew he felt an electric current any time he was even remotely near her.

  CHAPTER THREE

  They sped back to the dorms, not talking much. There was some unknown tension filli
ng the car; Colton played some alt-rock pretty loud, trying not to stare at the curves of the girl sitting next to him fidgeting again. She refused to put the soiled scarf back on. Colton refused to admit how enticing her chest was to him.

  She broke the silence as they were pulling up to her dorm. “So…if Angela isn’t your girlfriend, who is she to you?”

  “You’re pretty fucking nosy, huh?”

  “No. I just don’t go around making out with people I’m not dating,” Lauren stated simply.

  “I never said I wasn’t dating her.”

  “Oh,” she said, looking confused.

  “I just said she wasn’t my girlfriend.”

  “Does she know that?”

  Colton laughed again. “You’re something else, you know that? Do you always grill people who you’ve just met? Or am I special?”

  She shifted uncomfortably a little in his passenger’s seat. “I guess I’m just confused. I’m sorry. I won’t ask anymore. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I guess I just feel a little…” She paused. “I’m just feeling like a fish out of water. It’s normal, right, first year and all? Trying to make friends?”

  “Yeah. Sure. Normal,” he conceded.

  “You want to come in? Finish the questionnaire?” He was surprised she asked.

  “I don’t think so. I think we can give up on the questionnaire,” he said, looking over to her. She was staring at him. It made him feel uncomfortable, and he never felt uncomfortable. Her sex appeal was always brimming right there, and it completely contrasted with the way she had her hair and wore her pretty blazer with the pretentious Abercrombie symbol. Moreover, Colton liked her, and somehow, he wanted to try to respect her.

  “Oh. Okay. Well, thanks for the ride. I appreciate it. My first party and I didn’t even stay for but an hour…”

  “That was your first party? Like ever? Or do you mean college party?”

  “Well, I mean, I went to some parties in high school, but not really. Only maybe one or two where there was alcohol.”

  “Jesus.”

  “What? You think you have to be some big-time drinker to be in college or something? I don’t like to drink really. Is that okay?”

  “There’s nothing wrong with not drinking. I’m not saying that. But…just how sheltered are you?”

  “First you accuse me of being a virgin, and now I’m overly sheltered?”

  “Well…if the shoe…”

  “You are so…”

  “Right?” He smiled.

  She sighed and seemed to give up. “Thanks for the ride.”

  He thought he heard sadness behind the words, and it made him feel bad. “You’re welcome.”

  “See you in class Monday?”

  “Maybe.”

  “How will you pass if you don’t come? If you’re always skipping with…”

  “Calm down, Mom. I had a dentist appointment.” He raised his eyebrows. “Why? What did you think I was doing?”

  “Nothing. I’m just wondering how you’ll get good grades if…”

  “Don’t worry about my grades, Lauren. Worry about your own.”

  “Okay. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

  “Yeah, well, not all of us have goblets and goblets full of money. I have to keep my grades up in order to stay here on scholarship. Everything is paid for if I maintain my grade point average, so don’t go assuming I’m not serious about school. Don’t stereotype me, Lauren.”

  “I…I really didn’t mean anything by it. I…I guess I just assumed you were skipping with Angela.”

  “You’ve really got to stop perseverating on Angela and me.”

  “Well, I did see you basically trying to kill her. Suffocation by tongue?”

  He couldn’t hold back his laughter. “Why do you care?”

  “I don’t care.” She snapped and put her hand on the handle of the car door like she was struggling to get air.

  Lauren wasn’t used to the warmth compared to fall in Connecticut. It wasn’t hot, but it sure felt warmer than it had several minutes ago. She felt like she might cry for some god-damned reason. It was a Saturday night, it was only ten o’clock, and she felt like she didn’t have a friend in the world.

  “Hey.” He pulled her hand off the door. “I’m sorry.”

  “For what?”

  “I’m not sure exactly.”

  “Yeah. Well. You say that a lot it seems.”

  “Why are you so upset?”

  She really didn’t know. “I’m not. I’m tired. See you later, Colton.” And she put her hand on the handle again, opened the car door, and once she was out, slammed it. She didn’t turn around.

  She ran up past the proctor as he hollered for her to come back and show her ID. “Hey, I need to see your ID or I’m calling Campus Police.”

  Fuck. She tried to wipe the tears that had somehow started to fall the minute she exited Colton’s car. “Fine. Sorry. I’ve had a rough night.” She couldn’t stop crying and really didn’t know exactly why.

  “Thank you…Lauren,” he said, looking at the ID and then her. “You okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m fine. Is the first week of college supposed to be this hard?”

  He smiled. “It gets better. I promise. I’m your RA. Third floor, right?”

  “RA?” She wasn’t even sure what that was.

  “Yeah. Resident Assistant. I’m here to help if you ever need it. It’s a way for me to get free room and board in the dorms. It’s my second year doing it. So far, it’s been okay. I only had one really bad incident.”

  “A bad incident?”

  “Yeah. Alcohol poisoning. Chick almost died. It was pretty scary. I hate being the rule keeper, but when something like that happens, it makes me realize that it’s important. I’m here as a friend if you need it. You look like you do.”

  “Thanks. I’ll be fine. I’m sure in a few weeks…”

  “Well, we’re showing a movie tomorrow if you want to join us in the main hall. Might be a way for you to make friends. What’s your major?”

  “BFA in Musical Theatre.”

  “What? Wow. You got into the conservatory? Good for you. Not easy to get in to. Are you trying out for the musical?”

  “Les Mis?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Yeah, definitely. My dance teacher thinks we all should.” Lauren giggled. Her dance teacher was brilliant but eccentric. She’d been a professional dancer and now taught classes in all the arts. She was dramatic, to say the least.

  “Well. Good luck. I’m in room three-thirteen if you ever need me. I’m Brian, by the way.” He extended his hand.

  “Nice to meet you. “

  “Nice to meet you too. And really, don’t hesitate to come see me for anything. I mean it. That’s what I’m here for.”

  “Okay. Thank you.”

  Lauren made it up to her dorm room, feeling a bit better after meeting someone so nice, threw on some yoga pants and a tank top, and got comfy in bed. When she pushed her finger across her phone, she realized she’d shut it off and there were ten texts from Beth, the last one, saying—Someone said you left w Masters?? WTF?? Text me!

  Lauren texted back—He drove me home bcuz I couldn’t find you. I spilled beer all over my scarf. I’m fine. I’m back @ the dorm. See you in the morning.

  Immediately she wrote back—Ok. Christ. I was worried. See you in the am.

  Then, right before she went to turn off her phone again, another text came in from Beth—O. And, Angela was effin ripshit.

  Lauren had a headache, so she got up to take some pain relievers and climbed back into bed. She scrolled for Taylor Swift’s 1989 album on her phone and sung along to Bad Blood, thinking of him: Band-Aids can’t fix bullet holes. You say sorry just for show…and cried again. He had somehow crawled under her skin.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Colton had gone back to the party. He needed to have fun. Be himself. Fuck someone. But before he could get far, Angela lit into him. She was fuming mad.

 
“Look, Colton. I get it. We’re not boyfriend/girlfriend. I get that you don’t want a relationship. And I’m fine with it. But I’d appreciate it if you at least date one girl a night, for Christ’s sake. You know what I mean?”

  Angela was tough, but she had heart. Under the rough exterior, she had feelings like anyone else. And Colton knew it. He loved making music with her. They got each other on that level. But things progressed to other things. And even though Colton really didn’t feel that way about her, he had let it happen.

  “One girl a night? What are you even talking about?”

  “I’m talking about the chick from music class. I saw you leaving with her.”

  “I just drove her home. I’m not dating her for Christ’s sake. Come on, Angela. Give me a break. Does she look like my type?”

  Angela sighed and gave Colton a long stare. “Colton, do you have a type?”

  He smiled. She was right. But he’d never dated someone like Lauren. Never a virgin. Never someone so…that word again, untainted. He wasn’t about to start now.

  “Exactly. And I’m not blind. I noticed her first, for Christ’s sake. She’s gorgeous, okay. I get the lure. But she can’t possibly be cool. She’s uptight as hell…and probably stuck up as hell….and never mind probably judgmental as hell.”

  “Look. I’m not interested in her.” He paused, making sure Angela would be able to handle what he was about to say. “But Angela, I really value our friendship.” He cocked his head to look in her eyes. “And of course, I’ve liked the benefits of our friendship too.” He waited a beat. “But maybe we should just stick to music? Not let anything else get in the way of that?”

  Angela stilled. She looked hurt. She was starting to act like she probably loved Colton. He was very careful not to lead her on, though. They clicked musically, but for him, that was all it was. For her, Colton knew it was more. So this needed to stop. Now.

  “Hey,” he said. He was an asshole, but he was an asshole with a heart. He hadn’t lived a charmed life. To anybody who knew his past, they probably wouldn’t blame him for being the way he was. Still, Angela deserved better. “Sorry.”

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ve heard it a million times, Masters. Let’s go back to my place and write some music. See what else happens.”