I should know. I spent years preying on exactly those types of women. Ones that were happy to trade having a good time for that tiny hope that maybe hooking up with a celebrity sports star would eventually land them on easy street. Like they could use their pussy power to turn me into a husband that would shower them with money and they'd never have to work again.
It wasn't like I knew that was what I was doing at the time, but a little introspection over the last few weeks had opened my eyes.
It was why I'd been so attracted to a woman like Laney. I didn’t even realize how bored I’d become with easy women. Their actions were guided by ulterior motives that I could never trust, which was why I never took them seriously. They were only there for me to have a good time. Truth was, I had tired of that long ago but just hadn’t realized it. Laney wasn't like any of them, and it was like a shock to my system. She challenged me to be more than the man I’d been acting like, and she wasn't impressed with what I had in the bank or what I could do on the field. She liked me for me.
Ironically, who I really was ended up also being what had ultimately pushed her away.
I wanted to believe I wasn't a womanizer, that I was just acting a part because that's what everyone expected of me. Besides, it was a lot easier than opening my heart to being rejected again.
But at some point, if you're acting like something for so long, doesn't that mean it's no longer an act? It was convenient for my ego to believe that I was more, but was I really?
Not until Laney and Izzy came into my life, at least. And by then, who could blame Laney for not believing I was capable of really changing? It wasn’t like I’d ever given her any indication that I was interested in more than swinging from one-night stand to short term relationships for the rest of my life. Maybe I could have proven that if I’d opened up and admitted how I really felt about her, but I didn’t.
So yeah, it was my fault that Laney believed that I was a womanizing piece of shit, but I'd be damned if that was the view that I'd let my daughter have of me.
I may have fucked things up with the best woman who had ever walked into my life, but I wasn't about to do the same with my daughter.
If I had my way, she'd never see that side of me. By the time she was old enough to read the papers or browse the internet, the story of Tanner Garrick would be completely different.
I was okay not talking to many of my former friends, or tossing out my so called little black book of booty calls. They represented a tie to a former life that I was anxious to leave behind.
I didn't need to go drinking or clubbing anymore. I didn't need to have sex every other day of the week. Those were all selfish needs and desires of a selfish man.
I won't be like my father.
Izzy needed me, and there was no one else around that would ever give her their sole focus like I would. Compared to her, everything else was secondary in my life now.
Which included football.
I still wasn't sure what to do with her during the season, but if I didn't figure something out soon then I had made up my mind to just stop playing. I had a contract, but let them fucking sue me. None of it mattered.
The doorbell rang suddenly, so I threw my dish cloth into the sink and headed out of the kitchen.
"Uh oh," Izzy called from the living room.
I made my way to the door, frowning. I wasn't expecting anyone, and this building was supposed to keep out solicitors. Not that a few of the more tenacious ones didn’t still find their way in, now and again. As I pulled open the door, I reminded myself to keep from being rude in front of Izzy, which meant toning down how I usually greeted uninvited salesmen.
The smiling, bearded face that greeted me was no salesman.
"Q?"
"Hey bro, how the fuck are you?"
He strolled through the door and grabbed my hand in his, giving it a powerful shake and then slapping me on the shoulder with the other one. "Surprised to see me? Looks fucking like it! Ha!"
His eyes glanced around the room and he spied Izzy, standing at the far corner standing up, purple crayon in her hand, staring at him.
"Oh shit, I mean, uh, crap. Sorry about the language bro, forgot there might be, uh, little ears around."
I shut the door and shook my head. "What are you doing here?"
Quinn shrugged, keeping his face turned from me as he answered. "Uh, ya know, just in town and figured I'd drop in on my big brother and meet my new niece. Is that so weird?"
I nodded. "Yes, actually." When had Quinn just dropped by for a visit? What would he be doing in LA anyway? He hated big cities. And as far as I knew, he was still working as a mechanic. It wasn't like he'd be here for work. Or could even afford to fly in just for a quick visit.
"Bah, don't be like that, bro. Anyway, how about introducing me to your little lady here."
He was changing the subject. Something was up, but I wasn't sure what it was. Still, he was right. He was Izzy's uncle and I was happy to have them finally meet. I still hadn't told the rest of my family about her at all.
"Izzy, come here," I gestured. She ran to me, hugging my legs and looking up at my brother shyly. She wasn't normally scared of strangers but I couldn't blame her in this case. Quinn was an intimidating sight. Bigger than me in every way, half his face covered in a thick brown beard, she probably mistook him for a bear. His brilliant blue eyes shone down at her though, showing more of the smile he wore than his beard obscured lips.
I picked my daughter up so that she was eye to eye with my brother. "Izzy, this is your uncle. One of them, anyway. Uncle Q." I almost never called Quinn by his full name, so I figured why start now. Q would probably be easier for Izzy to say anyway.
"Unca?"
"Yep, that means he's daddy's brother."
Izzy buried her face in my shoulder for a second, and then lifted it back up and looked at Quinn again. Seeing he was still there, she turned back to bury her face one more time.
"You need to shave. You look like a Yeti. No wonder she's scared of you."
My brother laughed. "Chicks dig a beard."
"Women," I corrected him. His eyes widened a bit, surprised, but then he glanced at Izzy and nodded.
"Right, sorry, bro, I mean women dig it."
I sighed and put Izzy back down. "Why don't you go back and color," I suggested. As soon as her feet hit the ground she took off back to her table in the corner to do just that. But I did see her sneak at least one more look over at Quinn. Maybe to make sure he wasn't chasing her.
"What are you really doing here," I asked, turning my gaze back to my younger brother. He was a year my junior, but anyone looking at us would probably think of him as the eldest. Not just because of the beard, but because of how much bigger he was than me. Football practice and training has always kept me in good shape, and I had pride in my muscles and staying fit, but next to Quinn I felt like a skinny runt. He couldn't be that built just from working at the shop, could he?
Quinn laughed, but didn't answer right away. He walked around the room, peering into the kitchen and even up the stairs. He'd been here before, he wasn't looking for a tour. It was almost as if he was expecting someone else to be here. "Why is it so hard to believe that maybe I just wanted to drop in on—"
The doorbell rang, cutting him off. He turned to stare at the door, almost gratefully. What the hell was he up to? And who the fuck was at the door now?
For the second time this morning, opening the door left me momentarily speechless.
Our eyes met for a moment, and a million things went through them all at once. But before either of us could say anything, there was a screech from the back of the room.
"De-ainy!"
33
Delaney
"Daddy unca down 'tair."
"He's your uncle, Izzy, not your daddy's. But yes, he's downstairs. You'll see him again after your nap."
"Furry."
I laughed. "Yes, he is a bit furry. I missed you, little one." I bent down to give her an
other hug and she squeeze my neck tightly. "I'll see you soon okay? Have a good sleep."
As I closed the door behind me, I could hear Tanner arguing with the two men downstairs. Cooper hadn't mentioned any of us coming by today, and Tanner was sounding very defensive at being ambushed. I wasn't sure yet whether any of this was even warranted, or if his friend was simply over-reacting to not getting to spend enough time with his drinking buddy. It certainly seemed extreme, contacting me in Europe and convincing his brother to fly over from across the country to meet for this mini-intervention. But I was here now, so there was no sense in leaving without first figuring out if there was anything to be concerned about.
They had almost twenty minutes to sort it out without me while I spent time visiting with Izzy before putting her down for a nap, but it didn't sound like anyone was any calmer than when I'd left. At least they'd held the yelling back until I'd taken her upstairs.
Mostly it was Tanner doing the yelling.
All three men stopped and looked over at me as I came down the stairs, as if hoping I’d play referee. But I didn't even know what game we were all playing.
"Laney, good, can you please tell Coop and Q here that I know what I'm doing and to lay the hell off?"
"We're not arguing that," Cooper said, shaking his head. Tanner's brother, Quinn, just stood to one side, grimacing. I had no idea what it was they fed the Garrick boys, but this one was even more muscular than Tanner and had the same, rugged good looks. From what I could tell behind that beard, anyway. But those eyes had the same piercing blue shade of his brother’s. And Izzy.
She's going to have men chasing after her like crazy one day.
"Maybe someone can tell me what exactly you are arguing about, then?" I suggested.
"I have no idea," Tanner said, raising his hands and shoulders and turning to stalk toward his armchair.
Cooper sighed heavily. "You have to talk to him, maybe he'll listen to you."
"About what? I still haven't a clue what is going on here."
"Tell her," Cooper said, following Tanner toward the furniture and plopping down on the couch. Tanner was in his chair now, glaring at his friend. "Tell her how you haven't left the house in practically two weeks. How you've skipped out on a couple of OTAs and that you're thinking about breaking your contract."
"What contract? And what's an OTA?"
"OTA just stand for Organized Team Activity. Basically a fancy way of saying early training. The Stars have started theirs and Flash here has been skipping them."
I looked at Tanner who just shrugged. "They're voluntary."
"Only technically, everyone always shows up."
"Whatever."
"And what's this about a contract?" I asked.
"He told me he's thinking about not playing football anymore." Cooper said.
"For the Stars?"
"For anyone. He wants to quit to take care of Izzy. Like he can't just hire someone to help out. I mean, I get wanting to be a good father but football is your life man, all you ever talk about is winning the championship and of getting a ring. How can you just walk away from it?"
"Some things are more important than football, or the damn ring," Tanner shot back.
"You really quitting, bro?" Quinn said, finally pushing away from the wall he was leaning against and joining the rest of us.
"I just said I was considering it," Tanner said.
"You asked me if I knew of a good way for you to get out of your contract," Cooper snapped back. "That seems like you were more than just considering it."
"Hold on," I said, raising my hands for everyone to stop. "Tanner, what's going on? Why would you want to leave your team?"
"I can't do everything, Delaney. I can't take care of Izzy and play ball. It's a matter of priorities, and she's more important. I'm not going to just drop her off with a stranger for weeks at a time when I'm away, and taking her with me isn't an option either. The team will go on fine without me. They have Bullet, after all."
I raised an eyebrow. What had come over him in the last few weeks?
"Don't look at me like that. You left to go to Europe for some ‘me’ time, remember? Well that's great. You can do that, because you don't have a kid to watch over. But I do."
"Tanner," I said, shaking my head, "I didn't—"
"No, don't," he said, shaking his hand at me. "Don't make excuses for it, don't apologize for it, I don't blame you. I'm not mad about it. If anything, I should thank you. You leaving like that taught me something. When it comes to my daughter, I can't rely on anyone else to step up. It's always going to be up to me. She needs me to be there for her, and I plan to. I'm not going to walk out of her life."
"This is about dad, isn't it?" Quinn's voice was soft, but it cut through the room like a knife.
"Only in that he taught me what it's like to be let down by someone you care about. To not be able to rely on them. And that's the one lesson I don't plan on teaching my daughter."
Quinn walked forward until he was standing close to Tanner. His deep blue eyes didn't waver from his older brother's face.
"So your answer to that is to never leave her side?"
"Isn't that better than abandoning her?"
"Those aren't the only two fucking choices, bro."
Tanner blew air loudly out of his mouth. "You don't understand, Q."
"Really? Why, because you're the only one that dad left behind?"
Tanner shook his head. "Of course not, but it fell to me to pick up his slack."
"And I guess we all turned into a bunch of fuck ups, right? Me and Kingston and Cullen."
"I never said that, and you know I don't believe it. You guys all turned out great and I couldn't be prouder."
"Because you gave us your full attention? Because you dropped everything to focus solely on us?"
Tanner narrowed his eyes at his brother but said nothing.
"You didn't do that, did you? You raised us, three of us, not one, while you went to school, while you played ball, while you excelled at everything. Somehow you made it all work."
"It's not the same thing, Q. It wasn't like I was doing it alone. We still had mom. And you helped out."
"And you have friends, and family, that will help you."
Tanner shook his head. "I don't have to rely on anyone else this time, though. I can do it all myself. I don't care if I have to give everything else up, it's more important that I'm there for her whenever she needs me."
"Is it?" I asked. Tanner turned to me with a questioning look in his eyes.
"Yes, Izzy needs stability in her life, but she also needs a strong role model. Gia was self-confident, with a strong sense of self and she never backed down from anyone or anything. She was probably the strongest woman I've ever known, and making sure Izzy turned out the same was more important to her than anything. Teaching her that is up to you, now, and you promised you’d do that. But if you're always there to catch her from falling, from making any mistakes, how will she learn to be strong? I'm not saying you need to abandon her, Tanner, but strength also comes from seeing someone you admire push for greatness and succeed."
"She's right, bro. Why do you think King and Cullen and I always push ourselves? Do you think we learned that from dad?" He let out a little spiteful laugh. "No dude, we learned it from you. From watching the Flash do well at everything he touched. You reached for greatness and never gave up even when shit always got pushed your way. So now that you have a kid of your own, why the fuck wouldn't you want to teach her the same things? Since when does Tanner Garrick back down just cuz shit gets tough?"
I watched as Tanner stared at each of us in turn. He looked so tired. Not just physically, but mentally as well. If it was true that he hadn't left his apartment much in the last couple of weeks, I could understand why. Izzy could be a handful, and spending time only talking to a two-year-old could be enough to break anyone down mentally. If he hadn't given himself a break since I left, no wonder he was falling apart.
&nbs
p; "Come on," I said, grabbing his hand and pulling him until he rose to his feet.
"Where are we going?"
"Out of this apartment," I said. Then I turned to the other two men. "Do you guys think you can handle Izzy for a bit when she wakes up?"
"Uh..." Cooper looked to Quinn, but the bearded man shrugged.
"I think she's scared of me."
"Oh for... fine, I'll call Roxie to come help as well. I'm sure between the three of you, you can manage. She won't be up from her nap for at least an hour anyway."
"I'm not sure this is a good idea," Tanner started to say, but I pulled his hand and led him to the door.
"I'm sure that three adults can take care of a toddler for a few hours. At the very least, they can keep her alive until we get back. But for now, you need some fresh air and a change of scenery."
With that, I dragged Tanner from his apartment despite him looking just as unsure about leaving as the two men I left in charge looked about staying.
Men!
34
Tanner
That whole intervention thing was ridiculous, and the only reason I let Delaney drag me away from Izzy was in the hopes it would convince them all that it worked and they'd leave us alone. But I was still nervous. "Leaving a child with an idiot is risky, and simply doubling the number of idiots doesn't make it any safer."
"That's why I called Roxie. Izzy knows her very well, she's babysat loads of times. And she'll be there before she even wakes up. So stop worrying."
I just grunted, but it did ease my mind. At least about that. "Still, I don't see why we had to leave my apartment just to come here to yours. How is this any better?"
"I told you," she said. "We're not staying long. I just wanted to come home to change. I hadn't expected to go anywhere other than your apartment, so I was just wearing this." She gestured to the jeans and blouse she had on. She looked great to me, and I had no idea why she needed to change. "Anyway, regardless, the important thing was getting you out of that apartment. You've been cooped up in there too long with only a toddler for company. You need to spend some time having adult conversations and doing adult things. You can't just shut yourself in with Izzy, Tanner. It's not good for you, and it's not good for her, either. She's a child, she needs fresh air at least!"
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