Later Gator (Southern Fried Sass Book 1)

by Julia Mills

Waiting, praying, hoping for help from my sisters more than I’d ever hoped for anything, I nearly jumped outta my skin as a tingling sensation, not unlike feathers being lightly stroked across my skin, danced up my arms and down my spine. A bright pink bubble, barely the size of a dime, landed on my right on the tip of my nose, teetering for a second or two before popping and filling my prison with the scent of home-baked peanut butter cookies.

  “ROSIE!” Her name had barely crossed my mind when I heard, “Stop this crap. We’ve got no app. We need our sister back. The Witch who took is surely on crack. Bring the Gator, too. And kick Wanda in the whazoo. Let the evil bitch burn. It’s time for Faith to return.”

  Not only were my sisters and their Dragonettes bringing us home, but my new family was also helping. My heart was near to bursting, as I listened to the combination of high, Scottish brogues, deep grumbles with Cajun accents, and Rosie and Daisy all chanting together. Happy hippies in a VW bus, we were getting out of Hell!

  The chains above my feet (Remember, I’m upside down.) began shaking and shimmying, making me feel like a sock in the washer with the agitator set to high, but I could deal just as long as we were going home. Cobalt blue bubbles, twice the size of the pink ones appeared in quick succession everywhere there was space leaving baby pink smoke and shiny white sparkles as the shivered and shook then popped, adding the scent of warm vanilla to the mix.

  "Damn, Y'all are kickin' it into high gear," I cheered aloud, throwing as much of what little magic I had left to the mix. Under it all, the scent of the swamp, fresh air, and what sounded like water trickling over rocks gave a firm foundation to the most potent spell I'd ever witnessed.

  Keeping my eyes on Dru, I saw her tiny, limp figure flickering in and out of sight. Holding my breath, clenching my fists, and grinding my teeth, I damn near gave a hoot and holler when she was pulled topside with a resounding boom.

  “What the…?” Beau’s words were cut off as Wanda screeched, “Oh hell effin’ no! You bitches are not denying me my revenge! I’ll…”

  “Don’t let her touch…” I tried to warn him. I swear I did. I’d only just remembered what Harmony had said about when Nate escaped from this very den of iniquity, but my words were cut off as the Hairy Wart crew shoved a holy-crawdad heap of magic into the spell.

  A bang, a bam, and a boom, like those humongous fireworks they set off for the grand finale on the Fourth of July shook the gooey walls of my cell. The iron on my shackles creaked and cracked then pop off, showering bits and pieces of black metal in every direction.

  Whisked into a whirling, swirling funnel of bright lights, my ears filled with the howl of the gale force winds my sisters and company were creating, I closed my eyes, wrapped my arms around my body, and held on for dear life. What seemed like a lifetime but I know was only a few seconds, ended with a thud as my ass hit the hardwood floors of Miss Bunny’s Diner.

  Jumping to my feet, I grabbed Rosie's outstretched hand, joined the chant even though I couldn't hear a damn thing, and poured all the regenerating magic I could into theirs. A rainbow of popping bubbles, plumes of smoke, and sparkling confetti filled the entire place, but still, we pressed on.

  Finally, just as thoughts of jumping back in the cyclone and dragging my foolhardy Gator back to reality, my heart stopped, my brain disengaged, and my mouth took over as Wanda Freakin’ Wiggley landed flat on her oversized chest atop one of Miss Bunny’s tables.

  Snatching my hand from Rosie's, I thrust them forward, my palms directed right at her lipstick-smeared face, and shrieked, "Go back to Hell you evil wench. You're such a bitch you make my ass cheeks clench. You've screwed with the Fairyflowers for the last time. Get outta my face you disgusting slime…bag. (Yeah, I know it doesn't rhyme. Give me a break, I was stressed.)

  Throwing her hands up just in time, the nasty, evil, despicable Wanda Wiggley absorbed the magic of my spell, redirected it, and with a poof of icky lime-green smoke disappeared into thin air. Spinning on my toes, ready to chase after the heinous wench, I was stopped mid-fleeing-the-scene as a set of big, warm hands, gripped my shoulders and whipped me around.

  Barely getting a glimpse of who was choosing the most opportune time to manhandle me, a set of scrumptious lips were smashed to mine as the words I never knew I longed to hear were whispered into my mind, “I love you, Faith Fairyflower. Dammit, woman, I love ya’ so much it hurts.”

  Chapter Twelve

  "You know, Y'all really should get a room," a deep baritone chuckle sounded from behind Beau, breaking the spell his kiss had cast as I reluctantly pulled my lips from his.

  “Yeah, and you should keep your trap shut, Old Man,” Beau grumbled with a grin on his face as he winked at me. “Wasn’t it you who said to cut the Mating Dance short and get down to business.”

  “Hell no, that was your Uncle Jeremiah.”

  Looking over Beau’s shoulder at an older, gray-haired version of the Gator the Universe had seen fit to make just for me, I laughed out loud as that man was joined by another who also bore an incredible family resemblance with his hands raised in surrender and his head frantically shaking as he begged, “Do not shoot the messenger. I was the only one with the cojones to say what needed to be said.”

  Turning around and taking me with him, my Gator Mate (Yes, I know it sounds like Gator bait, that's probably why I like saying it so much.) introduced me to not only his Granddad Joshua and Uncle Jeremiah but six other uncles and cousins. Just when I thought we were done, an Alligator Shifter most definitely older than Joshua and more powerful than any Shifter of any kind I'd ever run into sidled up to us and stuck out his hand.

  “I am so proud to meet you Faith Fairyflower and can’t wait ‘til you and Beau here make it all official.” Taking his hand as he continued, his immense magic skittered up my arm. “My name is Zachariah St. Croix, Beauregard’s Great-Great-Grandad.”

  “It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. St. Croix.”

  “Aww, now don’t go ruinin’ everything by being formal. You just call me Old Paw like everybody else.”

  Trying hard not to giggle like an excited schoolgirl, I nodded, “Yes sir, Old Paw. Thank you.”

  Handing Beau something he was very keen to keep a secret, Old Paw winked, “You just make sure I get invited to the wedding.”

  Reaching for his hand again, I waited until we were standing face-to-face before asking, “I sure will, and if I might ask…”

  “You can ask me anything, Sweet Girl,” he grinned, adding his other hand on top of where ours were joined between us.

  "Would you do me the honor of walking me down the aisle, if, when or ever Beau and I get to the ‘til death do us part' thing?"

  His light blue eyes got watery and his deep, gravelly voice cracked just a bit as he nodded and smiled, “I’ll be there with bells on.” Pulling me close, out from under my Mate’s arm, he added with a whisper, “He’ll get there, Darlin’. Don’t you worry your pretty little head. He’s been havin’ an awful time stayin’ away.”

  Kissing the old man on the cheek, I murmured, “We’ll see how things go.”

  Without another word, he turned and walked away, taking a seat in one of Miss Bunny's booths and giving me a wink. That old man was truly something else. I had no clue where mine and Beau's very new, very fragile relationship was going to go, but if Old Paw and the Universe had any say in the matter, I could only imagine what the next couple thousand years was gonna bring.

  Sadly, I didn’t have time to worry about my love life. Wanda the Wench was topside and I needed to find her skanky ass, shove it back into Club CopacaNetherworld, and keep Hairy Wart safe.

  Turning towards Rosie and Daisy, I almost made it a whole step before Beau grabbed my hand and Dru popped into view. Whipping through the air like a red rocket, she landed on my shoulder, touched my cheek with the side of her snout and whispered into my mind, “I know you don’t like me talking to you this way, but I just needed to say thank you very much. Fflur and Taffy told me how you made sure I
was out of that awful place before letting them rescue you. I will forever be grateful.”

  “Don’t ever worry about stuff like that.” I leaned my head to hers once again, since it had become our substitution for a hug, I knew she would understand. “We’re a team, remember? I got your back, just like you’ve got mine. And hey, maybe this whole mental walkie-talkie thing isn’t so bad.”

  “But in Purgatory…”

  “Stop worrying, Dru. The way I open my mouth and insert a variety of body parts, you’ll be saving my butt more times than not.”

  Laughing out loud, she teased so everyone could hear, “Faith Fairyflower, you are one of a kind.”

  “Thank the Goddess,” everyone in the diner immediately hollered, to which I stuck out my tongue and flipped up my middle fingers.

  Waiting until I could hear myself think, I sat down with Beau and my sisters with the Dragonettes standing on the table and everyone else crowding behind us as I dais, “Now, I know Hairy Wart is quite literally a four-way stop in the middle of the swamp, but there’s a helluva lot a ground to cover.”

  “We’re gonna head on out to the swamp,” Beau’s Uncle Robb answered. “What’s home base and we’ve got lots of friends that will be chompin’ at the bit to catch the no-good Witch who tried to hurt you and Beau.”

  “Thank you,” I smiled before turning to Lester who’d just walked into the diner. “Hey there, Les. How was work?” I tried to cool because the poor man was jumpier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rockin’ chairs when in human form. I should’ve known he already knew everything that happened and was coming to check on me.

  Rushing forward, he hurried through the aisle those standing around the table made for him and stopped right next to my chair. Leaning down, he wrapped his arms around me, kissed the top of my head, and cooed, "Oh my sweet, sweet Faith, are you okay? Did that nasty old Witch hurt you? "

  Patting the back of his hand, I assured, “Oh no, Lester, nothing like that. Look.” I prayed he would loosen his grip and take a gander so I could get a breath, but he only hung on tighter and sighed, “Thank the Goddess. I was so worried.”

  Noticing the murderous look in Beau’s eyes a split-second before a growl bubbled up from somewhere deep in that sexy chest of his, I made my big-eyed-help-me-please face at Rosie. Jumping up out of her seat and coming to my rescue, Rosie took Lester by the arm and let him have her chair.

  Mouthing ‘thank you’ to my wonderful sister as Miss Bunny magically appeared with a cup of chamomile tea and a bear-shaped bottle of honey for Lester, I grabbed Beau’s hand under the table and using our mental walkie-talkie teased, “You better chill that growlin’ old Gator BS out. I have a lot of male friends and I can’t worry whether you’ll eat them or not.”

  “Until we’re properly Mated and you wear my mark, my jealousy is only gonna get worse.”

  ‘Okay, well, we’ve only just gotten to where we don’t wanna rip each other’s head off. Maybe we need to be sure…”

  “Darlin’, I promise it’s not your head I wanna rip off right now.”

  Squeezing his hand, I winked before answering with a chuckle, "Slow down, Casanova. We've just had our first kiss, and we need to rid Hairy Wart of Wanda the Wench."

  “Yeah, yeah, I hear ya’. Just know that I’m gonna do everything in my considerable power to lock this thing between us down. You are mine, Faith Fairyflower, and don’t you ever forget it.”

  Shaking my head as I tried to hide the blush I knew was shining brightly on my cheeks, I looked up to Matt and asked, "What about you and Lucy and the other Big Cats? You think you can take the Big Woods on the other side of the swamp?"

  “We sure can” Lucy answered for the Deputy, propping her hand on his shoulder and leaning into him. “Matty and I’ll go ‘round up the others and get to it. There’s the old abandoned Marshall mansion out there. That’d be…”

  “Oh. My. Goddess.” My eyes met Rosie’s, then Daisy’s, then Beau’s and finally Dru’s before I slapped the table with the flat of my hand and announced, “That’s where she is. That’s it.”

  Jumping to my feet, grabbing my chair just before the back of it hit Beau’s Uncle Dutch below the belt, I narrowed my eyes and looked around at every single person. “I just know it. I can’t explain how, but the second Lucy said it, I knew. Felt right here.” I slapped the palm of my free hand over my heart. “Wanda the Wench is hiding in that mansion. She plottin’ and plannin’ and thinkin’ she’s gonna get the jump on me.”

  Standing up beside me before I’d seen him move, Beau wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me to his side. “If Faith’s says she’s there, then Wanda’s out there.” Looking down at me, he warned, “But we, and by that, I mean you, have to be careful. We can’t go in right now with the sun high in the sky, guns blazin’, and hope to catch her. She’s wily, and old, and pretty damned powerful.”

  Moving through his family, Granddad Joshua made his way to my side, the one not occupied by his grandson, and beamed, the gleam in his eye shining bright and a knowing grin on his face. "If you'll trust me for just a bit, I know a way we can get to that big house without anybody seeing or hearin' us."

  Giving Beau a questioning glance, I only had to see his nod before I turned back to Joshua and cheered, “You lead, we’ll follow.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Someone, especially my Gator Mate, should’ve told me that when Joshua St. Croix says he has a plan, it means we’re more than likely gonna be wading in the mud. I admit, his way of getting to the Marshall Mansion was completely undetectable, but I’m not afraid to say that I. Hate. Mud.

  Grumbling and grumping as I held tight to Beau’s hand and listened to the suck and pull, squish and squirt of all the rubber boots making their way through the muck, I sore to the Goddess, the Universe and anyone else who would listen that I was never, ever going to play in the dirt again. Under threat of having my butt spanked in front of everyone in attendance, I had stopped asking how much farther, but I had promised retribution, the kind that comes after I’ve ‘tired’ him out and he’s sleeping peacefully. Sherriff St. Croix better be sleepin’ with one eye open, ‘cause I was planning at least two buckets of ice water and a cane of whipped cream for starters.

  Shifting my attention back to our trek through the sludge, I ran through everything I remembered from my brief and deadly encounter with Nate after he'd been in Club CopacaNetherworld. Harmony swore the powers he tried to use on us were the same powers he'd always had, but I had my doubts. The dark, evil part of his spells had been a touch of brimstone and sulfur, and that nasty shit comes straight from Hell itself.

  Would Wanda the Wench be the same? The shitty magic she'd used on Dru and me hadn't been black, it had just been spiteful. She hated my mom for doing her job and wanted revenge. Since mom was dead, the crazy Witch had to settle for me, and I had screwed up her plans. It wasn't hard to imagine how pissed off she was going to be, but I was ready.

  “Granddad says we’re goin’ to that big bunch of trees right there,” Beau pointed as he continued to use our mental walkie-talkies. “You and I are gonna head for the front of the house, make a ruckus, draw Wanda out, but only after everybody else is in place.”

  I thought about reminding him that I'd been there all three times that Joshua had explained it to us, but that would've been bitchy, and I was trying to be good. Instead, I politely agreed, "You got it. I'm ready if you are."

  His chuckles drifted through my mind right before he added, “I appreciate you tryin’ to be nice, but I can hear what you’re thinkin’.”

  “Aww, damn, and I was really giving it my best effort.”

  “Yes, you were.” He stopped, spun around and pulled me into his arms. Giving me a hard and fast kiss, he set me back on my feet, winked, and turned back around before I was really sure what was going on. “And I love you for it.”

  Stumbling along behind him, trying to catch my breath, and make sense out of not only hearing someone say they loved me
but also feeling the depth and commitment of that love, all I could mumble was, “Love you, too.”

  Getting my wits about me just as we approached the Cypress trees Joshua had indicated, I waited for Dru to land on my shoulder before getting on my knees and waiting for the others to get into position. Waiting for my nerves to kick in, thinking it was bizarre that I was so calm, I remembered something Harmony had told me and chuckled.

  “Nerves are for sissies.”

  “What was that?” Beau asked, watching the others making their way across the pasture.

  “Oh nothing, I was thinking about something one of our other sisters said to me before I left for Hairy Wart.”

  He didn't answer, but I hadn't expected him to. Beau was all business. I knew from our brief planning session that he'd been in the army for several wars throughout his life and took the whole ‘being prepared' thing incredibly seriously. I had to respect that. I didn't have to subscribe to it, but I did admire it.

  All too soon, Jeremiah’s whippoorwill call echoed through the night sky. That was our signal. Time to get up and get out there.

  Walking side-by-side, hand-in-hand, Beau and I made as much noise as possible, hootin’ and hollerin’, pretty much making a spectacle out of ourselves until Wanda the Wench appeared on the porch. Standing tall, her hair looking like a rat’s nest, her lipstick still smeared across her face, and her dress having lost most of its sequins, she yelled, “Come to take your punishment, Faith?”

  “More like, come to kick your ass, Wanda.”

  Cackling like a loon, she threw back her head and stomped her feet on the rotting wood of what I could imagine had been quite a grand front porch in its day. Still moving forward, waiting for the Wench to take the first strike, I taunted, “Just come on down here and let me throw your wide ass back into Purgatory. I promise to make it quick and painless.”

  "That's what your momma, my best friend in all the world, said, too. Right before she zapped me with that fucking spell and tossed me away like a piece of garbage." Walking down the steps, she continued, "I was unfairly judged and unfairly punished and the people responsible are gonna pay."