Luck of Love

by Aleman, Tiffany

  I feel Blake’s shoulders tense up as her body goes stiff. “Enough Kamryn. You should consider your job before you speak to her like that again. I’m not one to play games with,” I say assertively, tightening my arms around Blake. Kamryn shoots her a look of disgust as she turns on her heel stomping up the stairs.

  Blake tries prying my arms from around her waist. I know she’s pissed. I don’t blame her because I would be too. Leaning down I murmur in her ear, “Babe, she’s from my past, and she’ll remain that way. Okay?”

  Gradually turning in my arms, she says quietly not even looking at me, “That bitch, just made me out to look like a whore, so I’m sorry if I’m a little pissed off.”

  Lifting her chin until our eyes meet, I lean into her brushing the tip of my nose against hers, I say, “I’m sorry she treated you that way. It won’t happen again, you have my word.”

  Shaking her head and releasing an exasperated sigh, she says sarcastically, “Well, she was lovely.”

  Placing another chaste kiss on her lips I whisper, “Smartass.”

  Shrugging her shoulders and replying she says, “Yeah, but that’s why you like me.”

  Releasing her from my hold and grabbing her hand pulling her the rest of the way down the stairs I say with an arched eyebrow, “Oh baby, that’s just one of the many things I like about you.”

  “All right, so here’s the deal. I have a hundred dollars cash on me. Pick whatever you want to play,” I say.

  “How about we play some slots first,” she says smiling at me adding, “I should apologize in advance for losing your money. I’ve never played anything like this before. I mean, I’ve played poker at home, but that’s different.”

  Tucking her into my side and kissing her temple as we walk to the slot machines, I say, “I have faith in you, babe. Slots are actually the easiest thing to play. Here, I’ll show you.” Coming to a stop in front of a slot machine, I insert a dollar into the machine and pull the lever. After we had spent twenty dollars on the slots and didn’t win anything, we move on, deciding to try our hand at the craps table where we lose even more money. With twenty dollars left to spare, Blake suggests that we should play some Black Jack.

  Stepping up to the table, I explain the rules to her as we take our seats next to four other people. When the dealer asks her what she wants to bid, she hands him a twenty. On her first hand, she wins three hundred dollars and decides to cash out. Smiling as we walk over to the window cashing out her winnings, she says, “Here,” trying to hand me back my hundred dollars.

  Shaking my head, because I don’t want her paying me back I say, “No, you keep it.”

  “No, Derrick, I insist, please. You let me borrow a hundred dollars so I could play, and I won three hundred, so please take your hundred back,” she tries again, this time shoving the money at me.

  “No, babe, it's called beginner's luck. That’s why you won, not because I gave you a hundred dollars,” I say.

  Coming back up to his place from the casino floor, he cooked us dinner, and we sat in the dining room at the table. While eating, he brought up a topic that was difficult for me to talk about. He asked how my childhood was, what my parents were like, and if I ever considered going back to Florida. I changed the topic immediately. I can tell that I’m falling for him more and more every day, and a part of me does want to tell him something about my past.

  After cleaning up from dinner, Derrick started a fire, and we cuddled up together on the couch. Sitting here tucked under his arm, draped in his warmth, and watching the fire, I say quietly, “When I was a kid, I was genuinely happy. My parents and I were extremely close—we did everything together. Rachel, my best friend from back home, and I were inseparable. We went to school together all the way through high school. In the seventh grade, everything changed for me. I detached myself from everyone that was crucial to me, everyone that I needed. Things happened that involved my Spanish teacher that I don’t like to think about. When I finally went to start high school, I was happy and excited. You know—I was finally going to be free of him. On the first day of my freshman year, I went to the admin office to pick up my schedule. Looking over it, I saw that my classes included Spanish II. When I filled out my schedule, I had put in for French, so I knew there was a mistake. Then I saw him stroll into the office where I stood. The look he gave me sent chills down my spine. That’s when I realized there was no glitch in my schedule; he actually had it changed. After that day, I couldn’t wait to leave Florida. I knew that if I stayed there he would’ve never let me go.” Goose bumps creep across my skin as shivers crawl down my spine. Warm tears trickle down my face and taking a shuddering breath, I continue, “I don’t have a Facebook, I keep my phone number listed as private, and besides speaking to my parents every now and then and Rachel, I don’t talk to anyone else from back home. I try to keep myself as far away from there as possible.”

  Soothingly he strokes my arm, just letting me have my moment when he whispers, “I won’t ever let anyone hurt you again.” Clutching his shirt in my hands and balling it in my fists, I hold him to me. I feel his hands gently cup my face. Lifting it, he brushes the tears away using his thumbs. Leaning in, he kisses me softly and whispers against my lips, “Let’s go to bed.”

  In the bathroom, I change my clothes, slipping into a pair of hot pink shorts and a black camisole and brush my teeth. Leaving the bathroom, I walk over to the bed, pulling the sheets back and climb in. Propped up against the light gray leather headboard, I watch the waves crashing against the soft-packed sand from afar. It’s cleansing, helping me rid myself of the shame and guilt I feel for what he did to me, for never speaking up.

  Lost in thought, I don’t feel the bed dip next to me as Derrick climbs in. Breaking my trance, I look over at him and back out towards the ocean with a smile on my face and whisper, “It’s so peaceful.”

  Looking at me confused he asks, “What is?”

  “The ocean,” I say. Laying his head on my lap and hooking an arm over my thighs hugging me to him. Combing my fingers through his hair, I gaze down at him feeling content. Bowing my head, I see he’s fallen asleep. Kissing his hair softly, I whisper, “Goodnight.”

  Unlocking the door to my apartment, I walk in and close it behind me. Seeing Dean sitting on the couch studying, I toss my bag on the opposite end. Walking around and plopping down next to him, I ask, “What are you doing tonight?”

  Closing his book, he peers at me through the corners of his eyes asking, “What happened between you and Landon the night we went out?”

  His line of questioning throws me off balance. With my eyebrows drawn down in a V, I reply dubiously, “Nothing, why?”

  “Because he keeps blowing up my phone asking to talk to you,” he replies.

  “So?” I counter back.

  Pulling his phone out of his pocket and shoving it at me, he says, “So, that’s all you have to say? Here’s what I think. I think something happened between you two. I don’t know what, and I don’t care, but you’re going to call him so he’ll stop calling me asking for you,” he tells me with an edge to his tone.

  In all the years I’ve known Dean, he’s never shown annoyance towards me. Crossing my arms over my chest in defiance, I lean back into the couch and say, “First off, nothing happened, and secondly, I’m not calling him. Why are you so pissed off? I didn’t ask him to call you or blow up your phone.” Raising an eyebrow daring him to argue with me, I push the phone away.

  Shrugging his shoulders he says, “No? So you’re not going to call him.” Shaking my head no, he nods and begins texting. “By the way, I’m not so much as pissed off as I am annoyed. All I wanted you to do was call him, so he’d stop calling me to talk to you. But no, you want to have it your way,” he adds with a mischievous smile.

  My eyes narrow as I ask, “Who are you texting?”

  Looking at me, then back to his phone he says, “And send,” pushing a button on his screen.

  Smiling triumphantly at me, I ask him
again, “Dean, who did you just text?”

  Leaning back against the couch, draping his arms over the back he says, “I don’t want him calling me just to talk to you, so—,” before he has the chance to finish my phone vibrates in my pocket. Reaching in my pocket pulling my phone out, there’s a text message waiting.

  Unknown: It’s Landon; Dean gave me your number. I wanted to talk to you

  Waving my phone in Dean's face, I’m irritated beyond belief. “Are you freaking kidding me? You sent him my number?”

  Standing up clutching my phone, it starts ringing. Staring at Dean, I answer without even looking. “What?” I shout in the phone.

  “Hey Blake, it’s Landon, please don’t hang up,” he says frantically.

  “Why are you calling Dean wanting to talk to me?” I ask harshly, still staring Dean down. With his head thrown back laughing at me, I storm away to my room. Closing the door behind me, sighing I ask, “What do you want, Landon?”

  “I just wanted to talk to you. I don’t like the way we left things the other morning. I know I pushed you too far, and I’m sorry,” he says sincerely.

  I wish he didn’t have this effect on me. I don’t want to forgive him, but I don’t want to lose him as a friend either if that’s what he is. “Look Landon, let’s just forget that the other morning happened. I want to be friends if that’s all right with you, but I do have a boyfriend, and I won’t cross that line with you. I really need to go, I have to get to class,” I say answering honestly.

  “Friends,” he says. I can tell he’s contemplating if it’s something he can actually do. Relenting, he adds, sighing, “I can do friends.”

  “Well look, I’ll let you go, but I just wanted to talk to you about everything and apologize,” he says reiterating why he’s called me.

  “It’s all right. I’ll talk to you later.” I say hanging up before he has the chance to respond. Flopping down on my bed, I close my eyes trying to block that night out. I’ve done everything I can not to think about it, about him. Then he calls and now I’m left wondering what might have happened if I’d not been dating Derrick.

  Lost in my own world, sitting in class listening to my literature professor go on and on about Shakespeare. I barely feel Kyle nudge my shoulder as he asks in a whisper, “Hey are you getting any of this?”

  Looking at my notebook, I realize I’ve been doodling instead of taking notes. A small smile pulls at my lips when I whisper, “No. I’m sorry I’m kind of out of it today.” I was in a good mood when Derrick dropped me off this morning, but then Dean’s little stunt kind of pissed me off. I get it, I understand why he would be annoyed that Landon was blowing up his phone wanting to talk to me, but it’s not my fault. I didn’t ask Landon to call Dean’s phone looking for me, which brings me to another factor now. Landon has my phone number.

  “Hey I know that we haven’t hung out outside of campus much, but there’s a party at the Alpha Sig Phi house tomorrow night. You should come. I think it would be lots of fun,” he says nudging my elbow with his.

  “Eh…frat parties aren’t really my thing. No offense,” I say with a sad smile adding, “I appreciate the offer, but no thanks. I also know that Ryan’s apart of that fraternity and there is no way in hell I’m going to a party that I know he’s going to be at.”

  “Well, all right, but just so you know the offer still stands if you change your mind,” Kyle replies.

  After class, Kyle and I walk to my car because he asked me if I’d give him a ride to the Alpha Sig Phi house.

  Driving to the frat house he asks, “I know this is probably none of my business, but what happened between you and Ryan?”

  “Just some shit went down at the bar where I work and he got kicked out. I’d rather not talk about it honestly,” I reply. Then it clicks. “Wait, how did you know something happened between me and Ryan?” I ask.

  “Sorry, you just mentioned him earlier. About a week ago, he was talking to some of the guys in the house, and I heard him calling you a tease. I stepped in and told him to shut the fuck up.”

  “Are you serious? What did he say?” I ask, shocked that he defended me.

  Turning in his seat he looks at me with a roguish grin and says, “He got all pissed off and got in my face, but I shut his ass up before he had a chance to say anything else.” I turn to look at him with my jaw hanging open. I can’t believe Kyle punched that bastard in the face. Good. Serves him right for acting like a douche bag and putting his hands on me.

  “That’s pretty bad ass Kyle,” I say smiling a smile that stretches from ear to ear. “Did you get in any trouble with your brothers or anything, you know for laying his ass out?” I ask.

  “Naw…they knew he had it coming. I know that you keep to yourself most of the time, but people know who you are and they know you’re not a tease.”

  I really am glad that I have friend like Kyle in my life. Pulling up in front of the frat house Kyle says while reaching for the lever to open the door, “Thanks for the ride. I’ll e-mail you later with the notes from today. Hey, would you mind if I came by the bar again sometime, you know to hang out?”

  “No, I don’t mind. I think it would be great if you came by the bar again. It’ll be great to hang out outside of class.”

  Nodding he smiles. “Alright then, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Yeah, see you tomorrow.”

  Sitting in a leather chair behind my desk in my office, I hold my phone and think about calling Blake. It has been five days since we last spoke. I’d called Dean every day since that Sunday morning when she walked out of my apartment. I knew he was starting to get pissed that I was calling him wanting to talk to her, but I needed to apologize.

  I’ve buried myself in my work, studying case law and prepping for a trial coming up in December. I was trying to do something, anything to get her off my mind. Fuck it; the only way to purge her from my body is to prove that I’m over it. I think in a couple of days, Thursday, I’m going to go see her.

  A couple of hours later, I’m working on the Smith case, going through hundreds of pages of discovery when my phone starts ringing. Seeing Blake’s name on the screen, I grin answering, “Hey beautiful. What’s up?”

  Chuckling, I know she’s smiling when she says, “Not much. I just haven’t talked to you in a few days, and I thought I’d see how you’re doing.”

  “I’m good. I worked through the weekend prepping for this trial I have coming up in December,” I respond.

  “I’m so sorry you had to work through the weekend. But I guess you do what you have to, right?”

  “Yeah, it’s okay though. I’m taking off this Friday and the weekend; you know just some time for me. I don’t mind the work, I like being an attorney, but it can be grueling.”

  “I know how you feel. Going to school full time and working full time gets exhausting. Next year, my schedule’s going to be even more hectic since I’ll be interning too,” she replies with a shakiness in her voice.

  Hoping to let her know that she has someone in her corner I say, “I believe in you. I know you can do it. It’s not easy, but you know if you ever need anything, I’ll be here.” She’s quiet on the other end. I know she’s thinking about what I said. I intended there to be a double entendre in that message, and I know she knows it. I’ll be here if she needs a friend, and I’ll be here if her heart gets broken too.

  “Um…okay,” she says stammering. “Well, I thought I’d give you call and see how you were. It seems like you’re busy, so I guess I’ll let you go,” she says quickly.

  “Blake, I can always make time for you. Speaking of, what are you doing this weekend?” I ask her casually.

  “I’m working. I took off yesterday to spend some time with my boyfriend.”

  Making sure to put that in there, she doesn’t want me to forget the friends-only rule that we had established. “Did you have a good time?” I ask nonchalantly. I really don’t want to know, but I don’t want her to think that it bothers me either.r />
  “Yeah, it was great to see him. We don’t get to see each other that often. We went to the beach and had a picnic. It was nice,” she sighs into the phone. “Landon…I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t be telling you about my date. I know how you feel about me, and here I’m rubbing my relationship in your face. That’s not fair to you. I really am very sorry.”

  “Don’t worry about it. okay? I asked, and that’s my fault. I didn’t know when I asked that you were going to go into detail, but I’m glad that you had a good time. Well, I should let you go. I have a meeting in fifteen minutes anyway, but I’ll talk to you later.” I end the call before she even has a chance to respond. I am such an ass. There’s a storm brewing inside me as I cradle my head in my hands. I’m not pissed that she had a good time on her date; she deserves it. I’m pissed because I wish the date would have been with me, but it wasn’t. My emotions are running rampant as I think about how she has my head and my heart pulling in opposite directions. A small part of me wants to care that she has a boyfriend, but that’s only because I have some morals. For the most part—I don’t care. I want nothing more than to make her mine.

  Walking over to the wet bar in my office, I grab the bottle of Jameson and a glass tumbler, making myself a drink. Standing in front of the floor to ceiling windows of my office, I stare out at the New York City skyline. Tossing back my drink, I realize that I’m going to do what I have to do to win Blake over.

  On Thursday night, I’m going to show up at the bar and lay it all out on the line for her. I’ll show her what being with me could be like.

  Putting my car in park across the street from Frankie’s, I turn off the ignition and get out, making my way across the street. I talked to Dean earlier this afternoon, asking him if it was okay that I stopped by tonight. He’d said yeah. I could tell in his voice, he knew I was being ambiguous.