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Rockstar Untamed: A Single Dad Virgin Romance

Page 60

by Michelle Love


  God, my thighs were burning, and I slid my hand under the cloth as I moved onto the part of the story where he was taking her on the desk, all of her clothes ripped off as she clawed his back. I kept my body still, only moving my hand as my body tensed up with every press of my fingers.

  Oh, God.

  I came when the woman screamed his name, and was so tempted to scream out that I pressed my arm against my mouth and bit down. It hurt, but I came harder from that as I closed my eyes and remained quiet. If I lived alone, I’d do that every night. It was incredible. I glanced over at Melody, once I recovered, to see her still sleeping and wiped my hands on my shirt.

  Just for fun, I read another story that made me repeat the process, slower this time and just for the release. I bookmarked the site and plugged my phone into my charger before I continued to listen to music.

  I guess I fell asleep at some point, because it seemed like five minutes later that my alarm was going off. I groaned and hit snooze out of habit before I rolled over and pressed my face into the pillow.

  Reality took over after the alarm went off again, and I opened my eyes to see that the room was empty. I must’ve slept harder than I thought not to hear Melody get up for class. I took a deep breath and stretched before standing up and grabbing my robe. I showered quickly and dressed in the usual jeans and shirt for school before I pulled my hair up into a high ponytail. I grabbed another skirt and sweater with some flats and placed them as neatly as I could into my backpack before I left for class.

  I grabbed a large coffee today and blended in with the students as I played the night before through my mind again. It seemed surreal, knowing who I was. I was working at a fantastic place, with a possible future if I didn’t screw up, but attracted to the boss who seemed to like to follow me around town. That was creepier than I was allowing it to be, and I tried to reason with my normally logical mind.

  I needed this internship and needed it to lead to a job. That was my future, not some dream about the CEO of the company who would make all of my hard work pay off for myself and my mother. What was Damon going to do, sweep me off of my feet and make everything right in my life? No, because this wasn’t Pretty Woman and people in the real world worked for what they had.

  My thoughts drifted to Devin, who presented a more likely scenario. He was a great looking guy, and he was going to be successful in life. Devin was also close to my age, and it would be natural to settle into something with him as I worked toward my own career. It would be realistic, if I felt something for the guy. Would that come later, after a few dates, or perhaps a few more kisses? I wasn’t stupid enough to think life was like the books or television shows, but it seemed like I should feel something.

  I walked into class and sat near the front as I unloaded my notebook. I wanted to ask my mom about this, but our time was precious when we talked, and I didn’t want to sound selfish. I didn’t want to seem like I was ready to move on and leave her behind. She never did that to me.

  I managed to focus enough to take notes, and I felt a bit more normal when I left the campus for the day. I could handle all of this and concentrate on the prize at the end of whatever twisted tunnel this might be. That was who I was and what I did. I ordered some lunch at a campus deli and changed into my other clothes in the bathroom while I waited for the food. I added some mascara and a little lipstick to my face and noticed the weird look on the guy’s face as he called out my order. I blushed and took my tray to a corner table as I tried to study some notes before I went in for my shift.

  Useless. I threw away my trash and shoved everything back into my backpack before I caught the bus to the office. I reasoned that, after a few weeks of doing this, it wouldn’t feel so new. Going to work would just be a daily thing, where I did what I needed to do without any confusion or ridiculous attraction. Maybe I’d like Devin and have something going with him by then, something that would fit well with the rest of my life.

  As I walked into the building, I saw Damon talking to someone by the elevators as he held his phone in his hand. He looked angry, and I bumped into a man because I was so focused on Damon. “Sorry,” I apologized with a beet red face, as the suit looked down at me with a scowl. I looked at the floor and pressed the up button on the elevator as I longed for the floor to open up and suck me into it. As the door opened, I couldn’t help but to lift my eyes to see Damon’s eyes dark as he stared past me. I glanced over to see the man who I had bumped into and looked back at Damon with wide eyes.

  He moved his gaze to my face and locked eyes with me before I walked into the elevator and pushed the button to close the door. I leaned against the wall and took a deep breath as I thought about the intimidating look in Damon’s eyes. He looked like he had wanted to kill the guy. But why?

  Damon

  I found out right away that the intern in question was named Devin and that he had an impeccable record, much like Elisa. They’d probably be a great couple, but I didn’t want him to have her.

  I wanted to have her in every way that I possibly could. I wanted to own her, but that would wreck my tidy life where work and pleasure were completely separate. I read his information again. Devin wasn’t working with Elisa, or seeing her regularly, as far as I could tell. What they did outside of the office was fair game, but I didn’t even want that.

  Heat flooded my veins as I thought about her, and I closed my eyes.

  It was possible to fire an intern, but, in this case, based on what? I’d be the laughing stock of my friends and managers if I admitted that I was jealous of a workplace relationship, something I abhorred otherwise. I always told them to never go there, and, as far as I knew, they followed my advice. He’d been here just a few days, like Elisa, and I doubted that Devin had messed up significantly—certainly not enough to be let go. I wasn’t even going to go down the road of inquiring about him, since I knew how selective we were as a company when it came to bringing on interns.

  I closed the screen and opened my email as I drank my coffee. I remembered that I had a meeting for lunch with a major client and was glad that I wore one of my best suits today. I knew that I needed to adjust my attitude. I had a few hours, so I spent the time in my office, not seeing a thing in my company, as I normally did. It felt antisocial and strange, and I left for lunch early just to get some air and avoid the temptation to go stalk Elisa.

  I arrived early to the bistro and sat at the bar to have a drink as I waited for Stephen. He was one of the biggest clients that I had, and I couldn’t blow this. We needed the income and the good word around town. The whiskey calmed me some, and I felt loose and relaxed when Stephen showed up. We headed to a corner table.

  He presented the idea of several hotels all over the world, hotels that he wanted us to design. We ate steak, and I looked over the plans, well-aware that this could be the contract of the year. It would bring in millions, if not billions, and we’d be in every magazine again, earning us more clients. He was going to give me a week to talk to my managers and get together a skilled team to get things started, and we shook hands after I took care of the bill. It was an expense that I was willing to write off, given the money I was going to make. I had another drink at the bar, something I rarely did, making me fuzzy as I made my way back to the office. I ran into one of the security guards who wanted to talk about an issue with one of the security cameras. I tried to focus as I covered my mouth and attempted to make eye contact with him. I noticed Elisa out of the corner of my eye and watched as she bumped into a tall man who glared down at her as she faltered and looked up at him.

  I lost the conversation that I was involved in as I glared at the man before I moved my eyes to her face. She was embarrassed, and I could see that she wanted to be anywhere else as the elevator opened and she ducked inside. I walked away from the security guard and toward the man, then felt someone grab my arm.

  “Mr. James? I was talking to you.” The guard looked confused as I pushed a button, slipped into the next elevator, and hit the bu
tton for the fifth floor.

  I stepped out to see Elisa getting off the elevator. She began to turn left, then I called her name. “Miss Moore? A word, please.”

  “About what?” Her voice was quiet and tense as she looked at me and back toward her office. I stared her down until she approached me and leaned against the wall.

  “Are you all right? I saw your…interaction down there,” I told her, as she frowned and let out a sigh.

  “Of course. I bumped into him, and he was a jerk. Nothing more than that,” Elisa explained, as she looked at me with a sharp gaze. “Why did you look at him that way?”

  “I hate when men treat women like that,” I admitted, as she leaned closer to hear me. I remembered why I avoided drinking at lunch now and pinched the bridge of my nose as I closed my eyes for a moment.

  “What’s wrong?” Elisa asked me, as I heard the elevator open behind me. Glancing around, I saw that it was empty and reached out to pull her inside and close the door for some privacy. I knew that alcohol weakened me and made me lose my inhibitions, and I stared at her scared face. “What are you doing?”

  “I just need a taste,” I explained, before I cupped her face and kissed her soft lips. Elisa protested for a moment, then I felt her hands cover mine and she returned the kiss slowly. I reached back and pressed the button that would take me to the roof, where I found a private moment every now and then. Our lips crashed together as we rode to the top, and I heard the ding before I turned around and took a deep breath. The door opened, and I surveyed the light area to see that we were alone as I took her hand and led her outside.

  I knew that I was feeling a little intoxicated and that this was a bad idea, but I needed more.

  Elisa shivered and crossed her arms as she pulled her hand away. “What are we doing out here? I need to get to work, Damon. This is my job.” She wouldn’t look at me as she leaned against the door frame. “You’re acting weird. Are you drunk? I tasted the alcohol on your tongue.”

  Shame filled me as I stepped back to look at her. Elisa was scared and, more than that, uncomfortable. I knew that she’d kissed me, but now she was uncertain of everything. “I had a few drinks at lunch. I saw you in the lobby, and I couldn’t let you go, but I don’t think that it’s just alcohol. I know I need to stay away from you, Elisa. I just don’t know if I can.”

  “I need this internship, Damon. I can’t blow this chance, because I might never have it again,” She stared at me, and I saw strength in those eyes. “You’re not worth the risk, even if I do want you more than I’ve wanted any man. I have to go back to work. They’ll be looking for me.” I watched her turn to leave, opening the door and walking back to the elevator as I remained alone in the shade.

  I felt empty and broken for the first time in my life, at least, for the first time because of a woman. They would usually do anything for me—anything for that last kiss. Elisa walked away from me, and I walked over to the edge of the rooftop and gazed over the streets at the city that I once felt like I owned.

  Elisa

  I rushed inside and pushed the button for the elevator, turning to look behind me. Did I want him to chase me and tell me that I could have him and the internship?

  No, that wasn’t my path. I was supposed to finish school and get the best job that I could, to take care of Mom and me. I couldn’t lose sight of that because I was attracted to the boss.

  I stepped into the car and pushed the button for my floor. I ran my hands over my clothes and my hair, as I tried to look around to see a reflection of myself. I couldn’t look like I’d done this with Damon, whatever this was. I stepped off the elevator and lifted my head as I headed straight for the restroom to find a mirror, and whatever was left of my dignity.

  When I came out, Devin was passing by to go to the men’s room, and he stopped with a smile. I had fixed my makeup, and I knew that I looked back to normal, so I smiled back.

  “Hey, you,” he greeted me.

  I compared his kiss to that of Damon’s, and it was night and day. Devin’s was pleasurable at best, but Damon’s was like the air that I needed to breathe to survive. I know that I’d lost myself in that elevator and likely led him on, but he was intoxicating and, even now, my mouth burned for more. It felt like I would never stop tingling for him, no matter how much time passed.

  “Hi, Devin. How are you?” I asked him, as he looked me over.

  “I’m great. I’m really looking forward to Friday,” His eyes searched mine, and I nodded.

  “I am as well.” I felt the sweat pooling in my hair as he looked at me and quickly licked my lips. “I need to get to my team, Devin. I’m running late today, due to traffic, and they’re expecting me. Can we talk after work?”

  “Sure, that would be great. Are you all right, Elisa?” He looked concerned, and I brushed a drop of sweat from my forehead and smiled.

  “I’m fine, Devin. I just hate being late.” There was a lot more that I could’ve added to the statement, but I left it alone. I didn’t need to give Damon any more fuel than I already had.

  “Get to your team. I’ll meet you in the lobby after work, around six? That’s how long you work, right?” I nodded. Normally it was, but I was willing to stay if things ran late. I already felt like I needed to make up for what I’d done with Damon. “See you soon.”

  I saw Autumn walking over and she watched Devin leave. “Did you guys hit it off?”

  “Kind of. I’m sorry that I’m late, Autumn. There was traffic getting here,” I told her, as she shrugged.

  “No worries. You work hard when you’re here, and this is Boston. Traffic is everywhere,” She smiled and pushed the bathroom door open. “Check out the plans!! They’re looking hot.”

  I grinned and headed to our room to greet the rest of the team. I loved it here. I loved the vibe and the creative flow that existed here. I didn’t want to risk it for a fling with Damon, even if it would be the hottest thing I might ever do in my life. I needed this for my future more than I needed any man.

  I looked over their progress and admired it. I longed to be a full-time employee here, doing this every day, but that would come soon. I just needed to prove myself, and I would have that.

  I threw myself into the project, and we talked about ideas, jotting some down as Michael worked on the computer. Everyone had their place here, and I was going to find mine as well.

  We ended up working until eight before we straggled out of there, and I knew I missed Devin. I didn’t care too much, though, which was something that I didn’t want to focus on. Devin was the right guy here, and the one that I should be with.

  I accepted a ride home from Vince, who lived near me, and we talked shop the whole way home. I got out, went inside my apartment, and made a quick sandwich before I went into my room and read a book on my Kindle until I fell asleep. It was exhausting to have a conversation with all of the girls who lived here when we were all home, and I wondered when I’d be able to get my own place. Maybe I could get something nice with Mom, somewhere she could walk outside and feel safe.

  I dreamed about Damon that night. In the dream, we didn’t stop with a kiss. I let him take me in that elevator, in some alternate universe, letting him have me against the walls as I cried out his name. It was rough and intense, and I could hear the sounds of our bodies slapping together as I woke up slowly with a low moan. I pulled my hand out of my underwear and looked over, in horror, to Melody’s bed, thankful when I found it empty.

  I couldn’t believe that I’d dreamed that and, judging from the throbbing between my thighs, had gotten myself off in my sleep. How embarrassing. I needed to figure this out and get him out of my head.

  I showered and went to class dressed in a skirt and sweater for the office in order to save time. It was chilly out, but my tights and jacket took the edge off of the cold as I sipped coffee and tried to focus on class, taking lots of notes. A lot of the students used laptops, but I found that writing it down helped me to remember, something I learned early o
n. Most of the time I’d type them into a file for study purposes, to further the process. I had a hard time making sense of what I was writing today, and downed the last of the coffee as I frowned and looked at the board.

  I grabbed a muffin before my next class and another coffee with a sigh. Everyone drank coffee all day at work too, and I suspected that I wouldn’t be able to avoid the addiction for too much longer. So far, I’d just treated it as something special when I was fatigued.

  When I stepped off of the bus to go to the office, I glanced around to see a coffee shop on the corner, followed by another one down the street. I laughed, and watched as the door opened to the further one and Damon stepped out with Brent, taking my breath away. He was dressed in his regular suit, something that he managed to improve with a crisp black jacket. I drank in the sight of him and realized that he always looked so perfect, not a hair out of place, or ever shabby.

  Apart from yesterday. Yesterday, he’d looked a little messy after the elevator. I watched as he turned his head to look down the street, meeting meet my eyes, and everything come back to me from the day before. Even with the distance, I could see his irises darken, and his mouth soften as I licked my own lips.

  I turned to walk into the building, once again pushing away my feelings.

  Damon

  I was a wreck after I went back to my office from the roof. It took everything that I had not to go and snatch Elisa from her office and have my way with her in mine. I had the most spacious office in the building, and there were a lot of surfaces to christen, something I’d only ever wanted to do with Elisa.

  Seeing her on the street made the situation far worse.

  Her words played back through my mind as I tried to read through emails, applying them to my own life. I couldn’t risk anything, either, since dating her would be completely against the rules. I sensed that Elisa wasn’t the kind of woman to want to give it all up in order to be taken care of by me, like some of the others I’d encountered. For some reason, Elisa was adamant about getting this herself, and I knew that she had the talent. She wouldn’t settle for less, something that turned me on more about her.

 

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