by Tanya Holmes
So his orgasm was my own—the warm rush of semen, the hard throb of his cock, once, then again and again. I felt it all.
Xavier collapsed on top of me. Still breathless, he raised up on his forearms and brushed a tear from my cheek, his gray eyes bright and glistening in the dim light.
He was happy!
“Hey.” He dragged his lips across my forehead, tenderly, lovingly, his sex still there, buried deep within. “You okay?”
I managed to find my words. “What was that? It felt like—”
“Like me quickening you.” His mouth lingered over mine, nipping, kissing. “That was the Seal, D. Now you belong to us.”
“But what did you say in Yoreck? What did it mean?”
He pressed a kiss to my forehead. “My seed is yours. My seed endures.”
Five minutes later, his seed endured again.
And again.
* * *
Denieve
____________________________
The phone woke us at three in the morning. Xavier grabbed it from the nightstand, eased away from me, and swung his feet to the floor. Head bowed, he spoke softly in Yoreck.
I pulled the sheet to my breasts and sat up when the call ended. “Who was that?”
“Sikes. She’s my Yoreck contact.” He scrubbed a hand through his hair. “They’re moving Braeden to a prison hospital.”
Fear tore into me. “What?”
“Don’t worry, he’s fine.” Xavier turned to me. “They sent him in for observation after he went unconscious. It happened when he was here with us. That’s normal for temporary Joins. But the mortals didn’t know what was going on with him. Anyway, they took him to Mercy General for some tests, but a few of the local assholes complained about security issues, so they’re transferring him to Stateview Prison Hospital—not something we’d planned for. We can still get him out, but there’s collateral damage now. It’ll only be more dangerous the longer he stays.”
“What do you mean by ‘collateral damage’?”
“We had contacts at Mercy, but our reach at Stateview is limited. Which means we can’t control who’s touching him. So the Elders are sending a car for us here at nine a.m. We’re flying to Aspen.”
“Colorado?”
“Yeah. Torrance Hospital. They’ve bumped up the Join date.”
My heart started beating in staccato. “T-to what?” All my fears coalesced as his sober expression supplied the answer. “Today? Are you serious?”
“Hey, what’s with the face?” Xavier gathered me in his arms. “It’ll be fine—the trip, the Join. Everything. Angela’s flying in—probably in a few days, once she ties up loose ends. As for the procedure, I’m not anticipating any issues. It gets complicated if one of us is resistant, but we’re both willing participants. That makes all the difference. And we’re going to the best of the best. Torrance specializes in Joinings and The Dividing of One.”
“But what about the two of you?” I asked. “How can you be sure you won’t reject each other?”
“Because it feels different this time. Before we couldn’t stand to be next to each other. Now there’s this pull. Kind of like a magnet drawing us together. And fuck if we both don’t want it. That’s what’s so damn weird. And every minute it gets harder to resist. I felt it when he came to us. I actually missed the asshole when he left. That’s what I meant when I said I was pumped. It was never like that before.”
No amount of happy talk would soothe me because the risks were still there. Even so, the last thing I wanted was for him or Braeden to worry about me, which is why I kept my fears to myself. Well, it was more than fear. I was petrified.
“I need to warn you about something,” Xavier said, yanking me from my dark thoughts. “When you get there they’ll give you the cold shoulder. Yorecks are pretty racist. So take nothing they do personally.”
I love how he just casually tossed that out there. “How racist?”
“On a scale from one to ten? Twenty. The Elders are even worse…a bunch of dried up old mummies. Look, I used to believe like them—that mortals and Yoreck should remain separate. The only time they made an exception was during World War II with the resistance work. They were all in for that. The Nazi threat was too great. It stretched far and wide—to all the secret races. But that didn’t stop Yoreck bigotry. To this day they teach our young that the more interaction with mortals, the more at risk we become. And…” He hedged. “The more diluted our angelic blood line gets.”
“How the hell am I supposed to stomach these people?”
“Your people. At least they will be once you finish turning. But don’t feel bad. They’re equal opportunity haters. They can’t stand immortals like me and Braeden—Halved Yorecks. We’re defective in their eyes. So they’ll pretty much treat me like shit when we get there. At least until I’m Whole again.” He kissed my forehead. “But don’t worry. It’ll be fine.”
He’d spouted those three words again. I got the feeling he wasn’t just saying them for my benefit. That maybe he was trying to convince himself.
Sighing, I said, “I need to speak with Braeden again. Can that Sikes person arrange it?”
“Like I told you, our reach at Statesville’s limited, but I’ll give it a shot, okay?”
I nodded and forced a smile, but my heart was heavy. He must have sensed my unease because I suddenly found myself on my back, with him on top. He threaded our hands together so that every inch of him touched every inch of me as his thick cock filled my body, while he kissed me into a mindless stupor.
And it worked.
I couldn’t remember my own name after three minutes.
Xavier had difficulty with emotions—forming them, articulating them, even understanding them. So instead, he made love to me with his body and his voice. After whisper-singing “Con Te Partirò” softly in my ear, he told me the English title, “Time To Say Goodbye” was wrong. That there would be no goodbyes between us because in Italian, the literal translation was, “With you I will go.”
That brought me to tears, but he kissed them away and didn’t let me out of bed till well after seven a.m. And when we finally made it to the shower, I barely got any washing done because he was on me the second the water went from cold to hot. He blamed it on my Seal pheromones. Though we’d hung a proverbial “Mission Accomplished” banner last night, his body still hadn’t gotten the memo.
He’d pressed me up against the tiled wall, pushed into me, promising he’d leave me alone after that, but he was lying. He took me again when we got out. I’d just slipped my bra on when he embraced me from behind, cupped my breasts, then stooped and filled me again.
A low moan escaped my throat as my sex, still tender from our other encounters, stretched to accommodate him. It felt as good as the last time. His strokes were careful and meaningful as he pressed forward and withdrew in a slow, yet relentless rhythm. Lowering his voice to a seductive whisper, he voiced the sweetest dirty words I’d ever heard and slid one hand past my belly to roll my clit between his magic fingers.
Xavier was telegraphing his feelings the only way he knew how. Though he’d deny it, I knew this was his goodbye. His way of ensuring that no matter what happened, he’d live forever in my memories.
My orgasm was bittersweet. It hit the second I felt his seed pumping into me. He bit down on my shoulder, held me tight against him, and squeezed me hard, like he didn’t want to let go. Some part of me wished we could stay frozen like this. Anything to keep the world at bay.
When it was over, Xavier turned me around and kissed me long and deep. He scooped me up and carried me back into the shower where his seed endured yet again.
CHAPTER 25
TORRANCE HOSPITAL
ASPEN, COLORADO
Denieve
____________________________
A black stretch limo arrived at nine sharp. Two hours after that, we were in the air, flying on a private plane. Destination: Aspen, Colorado. Xavier held my hand the whole trip in silen
ce. He seemed lost in his own thoughts. I didn’t disturb him because I needed time to sort through my own feelings.
Given the whirlwind of the last few days—my pregnancy, Braeden’s arrest, Luke’s “death,” and the “death” of my beloved doppelganger, not to mention all this confusing Halved Yoreck business, and my newfound intimacy with Xavier—I hadn’t had a chance to breathe, much less to consider my circumstances.
I’d lost my closest friend, discovered a devious enemy in another, and now I was leaving my former life behind. There was also a strong possibility that I’d be saying goodbye to America for good or at the very least, for a very long time.
My only regret was what happened to Luke. It was totally preventable, but as of now, unchangeable. I just hoped that despite their alleged racist tendencies, the Yoreck would give him a fair chance and a wonderful life. Other than that, I had no other regrets. But fears? Oh, yeah, I had tons. Like what the hell was Caryn up to? And would I see her coming?
But Ian was my biggest fear. Xavier and Braeden, I knew, yet Ian was a complete mystery. They’d tried to ease my anxiety, however, the reality was he’d be a stranger to me. I thought he wasn’t, I thought I knew him—loved him even—but Caryn’s deceitfulness had robbed me of that sweet delusion.
We landed in Aspen three and half hours later, and they ushered us into yet another limo. The drive wasn’t long. Less than an hour, but it seemed like days because Xavier was still buried inside his own head. Thankfully, he snapped out of it once we reached our destination.
Torrance Hospital, or The Grand Torrance—this according to the name chiseled into a giant boulder marking the entrance—sat nestled atop a snowcapped mountain on two thousand acres of undeveloped land. The large white-brick, Châteauesque building stood tall, with its steep roofs, conical towers, and spires. It looked more like a fancy hotel than a hospital.
Obviously, this was how the Yoreck cloaked their activities. To the unwitting public the huge structure appeared to be a private, invitation-only resort, frequented by a select few. They even had a ski lift. Several tourist shops dotted the immediate landscape.
The ruse continued inside the “hotel lobby,” which came complete with bellhops, a bar and restaurant, and a front check-in desk, but once we reached the fifth floor, the masquerade was over. A bustling, state-of-the-art hospital greeted us.
From floor to ceiling, everything was pristine. Countertops, tiles, walls, equipment, even the staff’s starched uniforms were blindingly white. Everyone wore the same thigh-length tunics, loose cotton pants, and clogs.
All eyes were fixed on us the moment we stepped off the elevator and their animosity hit me like an icy breeze. They didn’t try to hide it. Xavier threw an arm around my shoulder—an obvious attempt to mute it—but their disdain was too raw, too potent. It gave me goose bumps.
These people existed in our society and no one knew about them because they’d mastered the art of blending in. But here, behind closed doors, and on their home turf, their true feelings emerged. How they hid their contempt for the human race was beyond me.
I smelled suspicion. Distrust. Hatred. And anger. More proof that my gift was sputtering back. Strangely enough, I didn’t feel like jumping for joy. Somehow I’d gotten used to its absence.
Being forced to rely on basic discernment and deduction had been a challenge, but losing my gift, even temporarily, had helped me grow. It also taught me the value of blissful ignorance again. My first lesson came with that car accident. Sometimes it’s good to be clueless about what folks really think of you. These people didn’t know me from Adam, but as Adam’s seed, I was despised. It made me want to spew some hatred too, but instead, I pitied them.
Xavier took my hand and led me to the admissions desk where a stumpy female attendant with big brown eyes and red hair greeted us—well, greeted him, not me. She didn’t even look my way as she escorted us into a sterile waiting area. There were no pictures or windows on the walls. It was just white—tables, chairs, everything.
Inside, another attendant stood sentry by a set of double doors on the opposite side of the room. She was tall with spiky blonde hair and a thin nose. Looked to be in her early thirties, but who could tell with these people? “You’ll wait here,” she told me, then to Xavier, she said, “Come along.”
Panic ripped through me. “Where are you taking him?”
A look of genuine concern softened her face and her eyes were kind. “He’s gonna be okay, hon.”
Xavier rubbed his hands up and down my arms. “It’s just paperwork, right?” He tossed a glance over his shoulder at the woman. Kind Eyes is what I would call her. She wasn’t wearing a name tag. At her nod, he looked at me and said, “Half an hour tops.”
But I didn’t trust that, so I did what I always did whenever I felt threatened, insecure, or feared a loss of control. I Tuned In. Look, if there was ever a time I needed my gift, it was now. Fortunately, Xavier was telling the truth. My sigh of relief echoed.
“Stop worrying, D,” he said as he pecked my cheek and disappeared behind the door.
However, worry was all I had left. It consumed me. I paced the room until Kind Eyes came back a few minutes later and guided me to a sofa.
“So how you holdin’ up?”
“Not too well,” I admitted.
She had to be a Made Yoreck, like Angela. No pureblooded Yoreck, at least not the ones I’d encountered here, seemed capable of such compassion.
“I wanted to give you some advice and a word of comfort,” she said. “Right about now, you’re having doubts about the procedure, whether it’s the best decision. Well, I’m here to tell you it is.”
“I wish I had your confidence.”
“It’s not confidence, hon. It’s fact. If you were to be with one or the other, it would never work. Why do you think they’re forbidden to marry?”
I just looked at her for a long while. “You don’t even know them or our circumstances.”
“I don’t have to. I know Halved Yorecks,” she said. “And they’re all the same. Truth is, they’re not complete. Not without each other. In this case, one feels too much, the other, too little. One’s too practical, the other too reckless. Separated, they’d both break your heart in the end. This is why I do volunteer work here, counseling mortals, ‘cause I’ve been there.”
“You loved a pair of Halved Yorecks?”
She nodded. “With a passion, but they damn near drove me crazy. They were helpless without each other, but hated the ground the other walked on. And the longer they stayed apart, the worse it got.”
“The worse what got?”
“The hatred. The madness. It claims them before the grave does. In fact, I think it’s worse than death. At least then you got peace. My men didn’t have that.”
“What happened to them?”
“They wouldn’t Join. Their hatred for each other was stronger than their love for me.” She drew a shallow breath, the memory obviously taking her somewhere painful.
“Did they die?”
She sniffed. “Yeah. They completed the Seal, for my sake. But when it came time to Join, they…they just couldn’t.” After pausing for a beat, she said, “But I have my daughter. I thank God for that. She’s a comfort. And the Yoreck, they take good care of me, racist assholes that they are,” she whispered. “If only they’d stop trying to suit me up. I’d have some peace.”
“Suit you up?”
“Pair me,” she said. “With a Yoreck male. They don’t like Made women being single. Makes ‘em nervous.” She eyed her wristwatch. “Lordy. I’d best be going, hon. I’m late for a counseling session.” She got up and took a few steps, but whirled back around. “Oh, before I forget, let me just give you a heads up about the Join. First time he speaks to you post procedure, he’s gonna sound disjointed. One minute you’ll think you’re talking to one, the next, you’ll swear it’s the other one. This is normal so don’t be alarmed. It’s just part of the transition process. In a few months, he’ll eventu
ally come into his own.”
My pulse tripped. “But—”
“Not to worry, hon. It’ll be fine.” She started for the door again. “Hope I helped ya.”
Then she was gone. For the next twenty minutes I worked myself into an emotional frenzy. My imagination dragged me to so many dark corners I was ready to snap by the time Xavier finally returned. It was then that a stark realization hit me.
I launched myself at him the second he came through the door.
“Told you it wouldn’t be long.” He folded his arms around me. “Oh, and check this out. They got somebody in with Braeden. He’ll be calling you real soon. That’s good news right?”
I nodded, relief filling me, but it was short-lived. The growing knot of fear in my stomach eclipsed it. I buried my face in his chest as a sob escaped me.
“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” He pulled me over to the chairs so we could sit across from each other, scooting up close enough so that our knees touched. “Why are you crying?”
The words didn’t come easy. “I-I finally figured out why I really resisted you in the Jacuzzi.”
“What?” He frowned. “Didn’t we already cover this?”
“Yes, but—”
“You felt guilty. I get it.”
“But that was only part of it.” I took a huge breath. “You know how we talk about Braeden repressing things? Well, last night I told you I was in it for the long haul—for Ian, but what I didn’t tell you was that deep down, I was terrified.”
His eyes searched mine for several moments. When he thought he’d found what he was looking for, his gaze fell. “My old man scared you.”
“No!” I rattled his hands. “It’s not about you morphing. I meant what I said. I’ll take the two of you in any form. But I didn’t realize until now why I was so afraid.” I paused when my courage waned. “The truth is, I couldn’t fathom the double risk.”
His eyes flashed to mine.
“It was bad enough having to worry about Braeden, but you too? I didn’t want to care about you, Xavier,” I sobbed, “because of this.” I made a sharp gesture at the room as the tears fell in earnest. “If I cared about you too, that would mean…” I swallowed. “That would mean I’d hurt double if…if something horrible happened here.”
