Folly and Forgiveness: A Pride and Prejudice Variation
Page 31
Elizabeth smiled, surprised both to find she believed him and to have her own words used against her in such a way.
“Neither are you, Mr. Darcy. Neither are you.”
~ ~ ~
Elizabeth looked around Netherfield’s ballroom as she spoke to Charlotte.
“Miss Bingley appears to have surpassed the magnificence of the last ball she planned here. I had thought she would leave the matter to her sister and take herself to London once she heard Mr. Darcy was off the market.”
“I believe she is attempting to attract the attention of the new resident of Purvis Lodge,” Charlotte replied while tilting her head in the direction of that gentleman. “He is said to have four thousand a year and be actively seeking a wife.”
“Then I am surprised she is not at his side already.”
“She appears to be on her way there now.” Charlotte commented as she attempted to hide a smile. Elizabeth looked again and saw that Caroline was indeed joining the gentleman.
“May I request the honor of your next two dances, Miss Elizabeth?”
Elizabeth turned, delighted to see Mr. Darcy bow as he made such a formal request.
“I believe they were already yours, Mr. Darcy.” She took his hand as he led her away. “I had not thought you to be a lover of dancing, Sir.”
“As Sir William Lucas once asked me, how could I refuse when so much beauty is before me?”
“A very pretty answer indeed. Have you taken to listening to all of that gentleman’s advice?”
“I believe the best I can claim is that I try to appear attentive when he congratulates me on carrying away the brightest jewel of the country.” Elizabeth laughed, pleased to see that Mr. Darcy’s efforts to participate more in company had continued back to Hertfordshire.
“Yes, you are all politeness and manage to keep yourself from shrugging your shoulders until after he has left the area,” she replied with a knowing smile before turning more serious. “I know the effort has been great, but I have never been so pleased as I am at this ball, watching all of my acquaintances view you in a new light. At first, there were some uncharitable thoughts about my motives in accepting you, but now that they can see the man I fell in love with, I am no longer suspected of such avaricious ambitions.”
Elizabeth smiled up at him. “I am proud of the man you have become, William, though I still have difficulty believing you could go to such effort all for me. With all you have done for me, perhaps I should have declined your request to dance and suggested something you would prefer.”
“I find myself in need of some fresh air.”
“Then let us explore the gardens.”
Elizabeth took his arm as they walked outside.
“As much as I enjoy dancing with her, I much prefer a quiet stroll with the future Mrs. Darcy.”
“Only a few more days.”
“And then you are mine.”
“I am already yours, William.”
“And my heart is yours.”
“For as often as you have professed your love, I do not understand how it could come about, given my behavior and treatment of you. How could you begin? I can comprehend your going on charmingly once you began, but what could set you off in the first place? My beauty you had early withstood,” she teased with a mischievous smile.
“And I shall forever hear of it. Have we not both suffered enough for my ill-chosen words? Had I the power to take back any moment in my life, it would be when I spoke those words to Bingley that night.”
“When you called me tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt you?” she further teased. “Would those be the words?”
“Indeed they would, for those words have caused more misery than any others I can think of speaking in the entirety of my life. Had I not insulted you, you would not have been so quick to believe Wickham or see malice in my every action. Think of the misunderstandings we could have avoided had I not said those words.”
“Instead, our first interaction could have taken place at a later gathering when you were not in such a foul mood. When did you first take interest in me? I must know.”
“I believe I took interest in you from that first assembly.”
“But if you were in too poor a mood to be sociable, what could you possibly have noticed about me to draw your attention? We have established you were not blinded by my beauty.”
“Miss Bingley once asked my thoughts and I had to inform her that I was meditating on the very great pleasure a pair of fine eyes on the face of a pretty woman could bring.”
“My fine eyes are what caught your attention?”
“They are indeed. I must admit I noticed them at that first assembly and found myself often watching you from that point forward.”
Elizabeth stopped and turned to him. “Was this before or after you spoke those words you would take back?”
She watched as Mr. Darcy stopped to consider the matter. “It was after, or I likely would not have spoken them. I was momentarily concerned you might have heard me and watched to be certain. When I saw you conversing with Miss Lucas, I was convinced you had not heard me and thought no more on it. You appeared far too amused and your eyes positively sparkled.”
“This will never do,” Elizabeth exclaimed and covered her mouth as she began to laugh. Mr. Darcy’s look of confusion only brought on additional laughter. “You have assumed your insult created an obstacle in our relationship that we had to overcome, when in truth it was source of our relationship. Your words were the inspiration for my amusement and thus, your subsequent admiration.” Her laughter grew stronger and she wrapped her arms around herself.
“Do you not see, Mr. Darcy?” she said when she could at last catch her breath and wipe her eyes. “You are not a figure from some Greek tragedy who sets into motion his own demise. We are most certainly participants in a comedy where every happiness requires first overcoming some outlandish obstacle. Therefore, I forbid you any attempt to undo your insult as doing so could result in us remaining virtual strangers.”
“I am well aware of the progression from admiration to love, and love to matrimony, but never had I heard of the progression from insult to admiration. I must confess, that is a new path. I hesitate to share such information with others, as I fear our story could cause a rash of rudeness by gentlemen towards ladies within their hearing.”
“More likely you would raise the hopes of every denigrated lady and her mother. News of being slighted would then be shared more eagerly than tales of longing glances from across a room.”
“I am tempted to tell our tale when next we are in London. Events during the Season could become far more interesting to attend.”
Elizabeth laughed again and laid her head on his shoulder, listening to the rumble of Mr. Darcy’s own laugh in return.
She had found a partner and laughter after all.
~ ~ ~
“There you are,” Charlotte accused her, standing in the doorway with hands on hips. “Are you determined to be late to your own wedding? Come, Lizzy, you need to prepare yourself.”
“Never fear, I have plenty of time,” Elizabeth replied with a laugh as she entered the house. “I wished a final walk along my favorite path as a single woman.”
“Are you having second thoughts? I would not think you needed to get away at such a time.”
“No, nothing of the sort, Charlotte. I was in such high spirits I wished to go out and savor the morning.”
Charlotte raised an eyebrow.
“I do find I am a bit nervous,” Elizabeth admitted. “I wished to clear my mind, but I have no doubts. As eager as I am to marry, I am still somewhat anxious to leave home and my family. I find myself somewhat amazed that Mary was as calm as she was on her wedding day.”
Charlotte came forward and took her friend’s hand. “I think a bride without any anxieties on her wedding day to be a rare creature.” They began to walk to Elizabeth’s room to get ready. “You and Mr. Darcy will do well. I will miss having you close,
but we will write often.”
Elizabeth expected she would be writing many letters in the weeks to come.
They came to the base of the stairs and Elizabeth paused. She no longer felt the same panic when she came to this spot, but was not certain she would ever pass it without also envisioning Jane kneeling by her mother’s body.
“They are just planks of wood, Lizzy. You pay your mother no disrespect by walking across the floor.”
Elizabeth blinked back a stray tear as she smiled.
“Having someone so able to read your thoughts can be a bit disconcerting, Charlotte. Perhaps I will not miss having you nearby after all.”
Charlotte squeezed her hand in response. “You would do better to focus on another place and another memory.”
Elizabeth knew her friend was correct. Walking across the spot showed no disrespect. Avoiding it did nothing to honor her mother either.
“I seem to remember your mother standing here often and pointing up the stairs when you had gotten into mischief and you were to head up to the nursery.”
Elizabeth laughed. “That she did, though I would rather not remember her displeased with me.”
“Do you remember the time Mrs. Lambert came to teach all of you to paint and Maria and I were allowed to join?”
“I did not mean to paint the cat, Charlotte. Why does no one ever believe it was an accident?”
“Perhaps because you looked far too amused with the result, but I digress. Do you remember your mother sending you upstairs to change your clothes?”
“I do. Her face was so stern I was afraid I would not be allowed near paints ever again.”
“You did not hear her after you went upstairs?”
“No.”
“Oh Lizzy, had I known that, I would have told you long ago. You had scarcely made it up the stairs before she was overcome laughing. Her face was stern because she was trying desperately not to laugh while you were present. She only barely succeeded and I was certain you had heard her. I came out to plead your case only to discover her doubled over laughing.”
Elizabeth thought back. She remembered the incident clearly, as it was often brought up by Lydia and Kitty as a reminder of her own improprieties when younger. She had thought her mother looked queer at the time and seemed to be upset all out of proportion to the crime. Was she really holding back laughter?
In this case, Elizabeth was pleased to discover her interpretation of the event faulty. She had seen her mother do the same after Kitty and Lydia’s antics, so she could well imagine her mother laughing uncontrollably at a blue and yellow cat that had gotten past Mrs. Lambert, Hill, and Jane before streaking out of the house.
Yes, that was a far better memory to hold onto. Elizabeth squeezed Charlotte’s hand in return as she walked across the floor and up the stairs.
~ ~ ~
Charlotte watched Mr. Bennet as he stood at the edge of the garden, watching the sun set on the first day of his daughters’ new lives. He had been a bit melancholy all day, but she had expected no less. Her father had been the same on her own wedding day.
“Well, Mrs. Bennet, we have had a fine wedding today. Four daughters married and a grandchild on the way. I can scarcely believe it. I swear it was but days ago they were running across the lawn giggling and chasing one another. Well, with Lizzy that very well could have been days ago. Now they are grown and off to their own homes. It does make me feel an old man, but it was a good day my dear. A good day indeed.”
Charlotte gave him some time before calling out, “Mr. Bennet? Ah, there you are,” and she walked over to where her husband stood alone.
“Yes, Charlotte. I am here, simply reflecting upon the day and how it makes a father feel old and unnecessary. I suppose I could commiserate with your own father on that thought.”
“You are hardly unnecessary, Mr. Bennet. Now that the festivities are complete and the new brides have left, I feel I must share something with you.”
“What is that, Charlotte?”
“Your days as a father are soon to begin all over again.”
“Is that so?” he asked, with a pleased smile as he put an arm around Charlotte’s shoulders and pulled her in to watch the setting sun with him. “Well, well. It seems we have not yet finished our time for celebrations.”
“Indeed, we have not.”
Epilogue
“Is the fair much like you remember it?” Elizabeth asked her aunt.
“It is indeed, Lizzy. I am so pleased to see it has continued as an annual tradition.”
“I mentioned it to William and he decided to take a more active interest than he had in prior years. I believe the fair had been quite neglected for some time and was not up to Darcy standards.”
“You could not have done better. Where is Jane?”
“I believe she took Charles to see the puppet theater.”
“Yes, I can well imagine him entertained there for hours.”
“And his son as well,” Elizabeth teased and the women both laughed.
They walked over to the puppet theater and found Jane, Bingley, and little Charles sitting in the grass as they watched. The boy did little more than squeal his enthusiasm, but the others provided hearty applause as the show concluded.”
“This was always one of my favorite parts of the fair,” Mrs. Gardiner remarked wistfully.
“Then I am pleased we have been able to provide it,” Mr. Darcy said as he and Mr. Gardiner joined their group. With the show complete, the Bingley family also walked over to join them, though little Charles was much disappointed to leave.
“Come now, Charles. We will see another show a bit later,” Jane soothed as Mr. Bingley carried their cranky toddler.
“All that is missing is a juggler,” said Mrs. Gardiner.
“We shall have to rectify that error immediately, Mrs. Gardiner,” Darcy said and picked up three stones from the ground. “Here Charles, watch this,” he called and began to toss the stones rhythmically into the air. The boy ceased his complaints and watched in wonder.
Elizabeth’s jaw dropped in shock.
“I had no idea you knew how to juggle Mr. Darcy,” Mrs. Gardiner said, as she glanced sideways to her niece.
“I admired the skill of the jugglers when I attended the fair as a boy. I often went to the clearing by the pond to clear my mind when I was troubled. After my mother died, I decided to teach myself to juggle in that space as a way to distract myself from my misery.”
“Was this one of the answers from your magic rock?” Elizabeth asked in a voice for his ears only.
“I suppose it was. I was seeking a way to be happy again.”
“Assuming you can save me from turning into my mother, your list of accomplishments now appears to be complete,” Elizabeth told him. Darcy looked back at her quizzically.
“I have heard that juggling is an excellent skill to possess when attempting to woo a wife,” she informed him and he laughed.
“Is it?”
“Indeed it is, for I have it from an expert on the subject,” she said, looking again to her aunt, “that juggling is one of the best skills a gentleman can hold. Your accomplishments are complete. Your magic rock has guided you well once again.”
“I already have a wife, but if I ever need another, I will keep as much in mind.”
Elizabeth pinched his elbow in response and Mr. Darcy caught the stones.
“I believe it is time to head back to the house,” he announced to the group. “The carriages should be ready for us if we head back to the main road.”
As they walked back, Elizabeth took her husband’s arm. Her aunt’s advice had proved true once again. She shook her head in amazement.
Upon reflection, she would have to admit her mother’s advice had proved true as well, which was more amazing, given Elizabeth had never expected advice of any utility from that source.
Elizabeth had chosen to be happy and she was. While she was certain her mother had meant she should learn to keep her complai
nts to herself, Elizabeth had taken different interpretation. She had chosen to trust, despite her fears and concerns, and had found her happiness. Mamma was correct on another point as well; a woman did marry for security. Elizabeth had entrusted her life to the one man deserving of her faith. She had her husband’s respect as a partner, which provided more security than any other measure she could imagine. His love alone would not have been sufficient.
Perhaps she had not followed her mother’s advice in the way her mother had meant it, but the wisdom still held. She had satisfied her mother’s concerns along with her own. Mamma would be happy Elizabeth had financial security, but Elizabeth was far more satisfied by her secure position in her husband’s respect, esteem, and love.
With the contentment and love overflowing from her heart, Elizabeth could think of no better moment to speak to her husband.
“I have a question for you about your magic rock.”
“I regret ever mentioning that place to you. Now I shall never hear the end of it.”
“Nonsense. I simply wish to know if it has ever steered you wrong.”
“Not to my recollection.”
“Then perhaps we should visit it with a question.”
“What question would you pose, Mrs. Darcy?”
“I would ask if our baby is to be a boy or a girl.”
Mr. Darcy stopped and turned to her. Elizabeth smiled gaily in response, tears beginning to form as her joy pushed its way to the surface.
“Is your question of general interest or have you something to tell me?”
“Little Charles will have another cousin a few months after his new brother or sister is born.”
His own joy was evident and Elizabeth let her tears fall. Her love grew with his reaction.
“Then we have much planning to do,” he said, tenderly brushing the hair from her face, before he leaned down to kiss her.
* * *
Acknowledgements