No Reason to Trust

by Tess Gerritsen

  He cracked a smile, trying to break the tension. “You are not lucky.”

  “That’s the understatement of the century.” She rolled her eyes and almost smiled. “In a weird way, this is kind of...nice. I’m not used to being able to talk about being in the program. It’s hard to hold everything in all the time. Pretend to be someone you’re not.”

  He nodded.

  “I kind of like not having to lie to you about my background or who I am. I feel like I’m deceiving nice people all the time. Worse yet, I’m always afraid I’ll slip and introduce myself by my real name. I’ve always been a terrible liar. I walk around feeling like a fraud.”

  “I can imagine.”

  She looked straight at him. “What happened to the witness who disappeared? Do you know?”

  He hesitated for a second. “We tracked her into Canada. There wasn’t much we could do when she crossed the border with her husband and kids. They had dual citizenship, so they didn’t come back. Not that it would’ve done any good. No one can be forced to testify unless they have something to lose.”

  “What happened? I mean, she was obviously ready to go to trial at one point. What changed her mind?”

  He looked at her deadpan. “She heard about what happened to you.”

  “Can’t say I blame her.” Sadie’s eyes grew wide as she stifled a yawn. “No offense to the U.S. Marshals office.”

  “None taken. I get to walk away from most cases feeling good about the job I did. Then there are those rare ones like this.”

  “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “Not calling me lucky.”

  He smiled warmly but didn’t say anything.

  “I try to be grateful no matter what. But after everything I went through it’s hard sometimes,” she said.

  “I have a superstitious grandma who drilled that whole gratitude bit in my head. I dreamed about catching bad guys when I was little. Hell, who am I kidding? After my father disappeared, I did my level best to become one of them. Life sucked. I wasn’t grateful for much of anything.”

  “Were you angry?”

  He nodded.

  “Your family help you get through it?”

  He nodded again. “Not sure where I’d be without them.”

  “Sounds like you have a lot to be grateful for.”

  That much was true. “Remind me of that the next time I want to pull my hair from them driving me nuts.”

  She laughed and he could feel her relax in his hands. He couldn’t touch her much longer without giving away the effect. He needed to think about changing the oil in his car or caulking the tub when he got home. Anything besides the way her milky-soft skin felt pressed against his thumbs and how she flared his instincts to protect her that went way beyond the badge.

  “Besides, you can decide for yourself if you like them when you see them.”

  Chapter 5

  Sadie’s jaw went slack. “You’re taking me to your house?”

  “Not exactly. We’re going to my grandmother’s ranch. I grew up there. I’ve given this a lot of thought and it’s the only place I can guarantee your safety.”

  She shook her head fiercely. “Not a good idea.”

  Concerned wrinkles bracketed his full lips as he stood, then sat next to her. The mattress dipped under his weight. “Why not?”

  “You seem nice. It sounds like you have a terrific family. So, don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m not going.” She folded her arms and turned her back so he wouldn’t see the tears welling in her eyes. No way would she drag sweet, innocent people into her personal hell. Whoever killed Charlie and infiltrated the U.S. Marshals Service wasn’t someone to take lightly. She still had her doubts Charlie would turn on her but she couldn’t ignore the evidence.

  “I don’t plan to give you a choice.”

  “I won’t do it. You can’t force me. I know my rights. I can walk out of the program anytime I want.” She stood and then folded her arms.

  “Talk to me. Tell me why this is a problem. It’s my grandmother’s birthday. There’ll be lots of people around. You’ll blend right in.”

  He came up behind her and brought his hand to rest on her shoulder. Her resolve almost melted under his touch.

  She rounded on him, shooting daggers with her eyes. “Well, then, I’m really not going.”

  “Give me one good reason.”

  She didn’t know how to be around a real family, that’s why. “Because I don’t want to go. I’d rather hide somewhere on my own while you do your family stuff. Maybe it’s best if I strike out on my own, anyway. Especially if the Marshals Service has been compromised.”

  “You leave this program and you won’t live an hour. I’m trying to do what’s best for you.”

  His words nearly released the flood of tears threatening. He was right. She wasn’t ready to relent. “Without including me in the decisions?”

  “Of course you have a say. We can talk about options. I care about what you think, Sadie.”

  She rubbed her arms. Crying wouldn’t change her mind. “It wouldn’t be fair to put innocent people at risk because of me. That’s why I don’t think I should go to your family’s place.”

  “All of my sisters and brothers work in law enforcement. You don’t have to worry about them. They know how to handle themselves.”

  “Then I’m sure your wife has other plans for your family holiday than to hide me.” Why did the word wife sit on her tongue so bitterly?

  “I’m not married. And once you get there, you might change your mind about calling my brothers and sisters innocent.” His steel voice warmed her as a wry grin settled over his dark features.

  Being this close, she could see the depths of his brown eyes. The cinnamon copperlike flecks sparkled. He was attractive and fired off all her warning systems by being this close.

  Her fight, flight or freeze response kicked in, escalating her pulse.

  She didn’t like danger. Danger caused her chest to squeeze. Danger had her waking up in the hospital in the ICU, and then on the run from everything familiar.

  She focused on Boomer, who had moved to her side, and scratched him behind the ear.

  Besides, she felt a little too relieved hearing the news Nick wasn’t married. A man like him had to have someone waiting at home. If not a wife, then a girlfriend. Sadie needed to remind herself of that fact because when his dark gaze settled on her, places warmed that had been cold and neglected far too long. This close, he was almost too attractive. Nick was one seriously hot package. Why was she surprised by this admission?

  Hadn’t she been a little bit interested in him before?

  An attraction now couldn’t be more inappropriate. Her mind was grasping for a distraction, she reasoned, not wanting to admit Nick’s true effect on her—her body.

  She held up her hand, palm out. “I’m not agreeing to anything. But if I do decide to go to the ranch, what will you tell your family about me?”

  “My first thought is to tell them we’re a couple.”

  “And they’d believe you? Just like that? I thought you guys were close.”

  “We are. Which is why that wouldn’t work. They’d see right through it. Besides, I’ve never lied to my family and I have no plans to start now. Momentary lapse in judgment on my part.”

  The suggestion of her and Nick being a couple should repulse her. The thought of most men touching her sent her straight to nausea. Not him. What had changed?

  Nick.

  He was strong and capable and gorgeous. She also felt as though he was the first person who had her back in a very long time. Charlie had done a good job. But she had been part of his work, his job, no more or less. With Nick, it felt personal.

  But could she trust him?

  There were too many sleepless nights under her belt to convince
her to let her guard down. The few private judo lessons she’d taken had helped ease the nightmares. She’d even convinced herself to keep a gun in the house, although the sight still made her chest hurt and the air become thick around her. There was something about having the wrong end of one pressed to her forehead that made her heart race every time she saw a sleek metal barrel. She couldn’t even watch those popular cop shows on television.

  Had she gotten comfortable recently? Become sloppy?

  There was a good reason. Creek Bend had started to feel like home. She had a new life and a dog for company. There were even nosy neighbors to round out her small-town experience. She’d settled into a rustic cabin near the lake that, against all evidence to the contrary when she’d first arrived, had become her safe haven. She loved her job at the bakery, even the zany hours. And some day, maybe, she’d learn to trust men again.

  Nick the radiologist had rented the lake house adjacent to hers, and had made a habit of coming by the bakery in the mornings as soon as it opened and her shift ended. She could hardly fathom the muscled man sharing the cabin was the same Nick. Then again, it was his job to go unnoticed when it served him best. So, why did she feel betrayed?

  She hated all the lying. Could she continue this facade of a life? Lie to Nick’s family? Deceive more people? “Can’t we just be straight with them?”

  “If I could tell them the truth, I would. I need to think about it first. They’re law enforcement and Smith gave me strict orders not to risk exposing you.”

  “I already told you I’m a bad liar.”

  “The past couple of years have trained you better than you think. The whole time I watched you in Creek Bend, you didn’t give yourself away. If I hadn’t known in advance, I wouldn’t have figured it out.”

  “My life depended on hiding my secret.” She blew out a breath and then inhaled. The warmth of his body standing so close and the scent of citrus soap washed over her in a mix that was all virile and male. “Besides, I don’t know if I could pull off pretending to be someone’s girlfriend if I had to.”

  “Why not?” He seemed offended.

  “I know you’re here to help, but strange men still scare me.”

  “Maybe we should change that.” He placed his hand behind her neck, leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her lips that made her body hum.

  He pulled back first, leaving Sadie swirling with an emotion that felt an awful lot like need.

  “We’re not strangers anymore.” He stretched out on the bed, clasped his hands behind his head and looked up at the ceiling. “We have all night to get to know each other better. Let the talking begin.”

  * * *

  “What do you want to know first?” Nick had to repress the anger rising, burning a hole in his chest. He’d felt Sadie tremble when he’d touched her. His offer of comfort had had the opposite effect on her. Yet, it was something else that sizzled when they kissed.

  When he’d put his hands on her calves, he’d felt her relax. He’d even felt a spark of something else. But he’d been on the floor in a less threatening position. When he sat beside her or stood next to her, he seemed to overwhelm her.

  “Where’d you grow up?”

  “Texas. In a small town outside Dallas on the ranch.” He’d been grasping at straws when he offered to pretend she was his girlfriend. When he really thought about it, he’d never be able to convince his sisters she was his girlfriend. Not with his history. It was a desperate thought. His family would be very keen to figure out how Sadie had done what no other woman in seven years could. Make Nick fall in love again. He wouldn’t bring a casual fling to the ranch.

  “Did you have a lot of friends?”

  “I had a lot of family. Not much time for anything else.”

  “Tell me about your brothers and sisters.”

  “You already know I have two brothers, Luke and Reed. My sisters’ names are Meg and Lucy.”

  Sadie eased onto the edge of the bed. “And you’re the oldest?”

  “Correct. But that doesn’t mean they listen to me.” He chuckled. “I’m afraid they all have strong wills and minds of their own.”

  “And everyone works in law enforcement?”

  “True. I guess we all felt the call to serve. Luke’s FBI and Reed’s Border Patrol.”

  “What about the girls?”

  “Lucy works for the sheriff’s office and Meg is a police officer in Plano. She’s married to Riley and he works for the department, too.”

  “I take it they met through work.”

  He nodded. “You guessed right.”

  “What else should I know about you?”

  “I can’t think of much else.” He’d always been there for his family, his mom. His other relationships were a bit more complex. After watching his mother’s pain, seeing how much agony someone could go through when the one they loved walked out on them, a piece of Nick had closed off early on in life.

  “What do you do when you’re not working?”

  “The usual guy stuff. Watch the Cowboys in football season. I like to work a good steak on the grill.”

  “Steak sounds like heaven about now.” Her smile was the nearest thing to heaven he figured he’d get in this lifetime.

  “I can’t argue with that logic.”

  “What about school?” She turned on her side, facing him, and propped herself up on one elbow.

  His eyes had adjusted to the dark and he could see her green eyes clearly. “Finished it as fast as I could and joined the military. I was the oldest, so I guess I felt the most responsibility for filling my dad’s shoes. I tried to ease the financial burden for my mom best as I could. We were broke but we stuck together.”

  “Sounds like you made the best of a bad situation.”

  “We banded together. We joke around a lot, tease each other, but we’re a close bunch. Mess with one of us, and you mess with us all.”

  She lay back and stretched out, absently running her finger along the top of the comforter. “Sounds like you gave each other a soft landing. What about the rest of your family? Did any of your brothers or sisters serve in the military?”

  “Luke served before joining the FBI. War changed him. He lost his whole unit. Came back a mess. Ended up divorcing his wife. He doesn’t talk about it much, but I know he hasn’t gotten over it. He stopped our youngest brother from even thinking about enlisting.”

  “I’m so sorry. Sounds like you guys have had to overcome a lot.”

  “Doesn’t everyone?”

  She nodded solemnly. Her beautiful green eyes filled with sympathy.

  His fingers itched to reach up and touch her face. To move her lips closer to his. To taste her sweetness...

  He stopped himself right there.

  His thoughts needed to stay clear to keep them both alive. He sighed harshly.

  She had brought up an excellent point earlier. His family would see through a lie. They deserved to know the truth so they could understand the risks. He would have to be up-front with them. “On second thought, taking you home with me is riskier if I’m not honest with them.”

  “You mentioned your boss earlier. Didn’t he tell you not to trust anyone?”

  “No choice. Besides, they’re law enforcement. They’ll understand. Maybe even chip in their advice. The more minds we have on this, the better. Plus, they’ll be able to keep you safe while I disappear to chase any leads we get on the case. The ranch is our best bet.”

  “Sounds like the best way to go.”

  Boomer faced the door and growled his low-belly growl. His hackles stood on end.

  Nick jumped to his feet. He palmed his weapon and pressed his index finger to his lips.

  Crouching low, he covered the distance to the door in a few strides. Anyone came in, they’d regret it. He turned and motioned for Sadie to follow.

  S
he was already on the ground, comforting the dog. Good. Last thing Nick needed was for the men outside to hear barking. Someone had found them. Could be Grimes’s men. Now the trick would be slipping out alive. It was dusk. He’d hoped to give Sadie a chance to rest. No luck. She’d have to make do on what she’d gotten so far.

  Another thought crossed his mind. They’d have to leave what little supplies he’d brought with him. He shouldered his backpack. At least there was water inside.

  The door handle jiggled.

  He braced himself, waiting for the bang against the door or the cheap wood to splinter. Whoever was out there wouldn’t wait long.

  He glanced at Sadie. She sat there, fear and desperation in her eyes. Something inside him snapped.

  “C’mon,” he whispered, urging her to stay low and move toward him.

  The sound of footsteps on the porch made his stomach muscles tighten.

  “The door’s locked. Want me to break it down?” A muffled voice came through the door. There had to be at least two guys out there, maybe more.

  Boomer was quiet for now, but his ears were laid back and his body stiff. A low growl rose from his belly. He’d bark any second.

  Nick ducked and rolled, keeping his profile low. “We have to go. I know you’re scared. I won’t let anything happen to you. Stick close by me.” He pressed a reassuring kiss to the top of her head. “Don’t think about them. Focus on me.”

  * * *

  Nick’s reassurance unleashed a flood of butterflies in Sadie’s chest, and she breathed a notch below panic.

  The voice outside was familiar. “I know him.”

  “Is it one of Grimes’s men?”

  “Y-y-yes.” Her throat tried to close from panic. She refused to buckle and let them freak her out.

  “I’m here. Nothing’s going to hurt you this time.” He slipped on his T-shirt and work boots, the motion pulled taut skin over thick ridges of pure hard muscle. His movements were fluid, almost graceful, as he found his way back to her and wound their fingers together.

  Boomer growled his low-belly growl again. The rapid-fire barks bubbled just below the surface.