No Reason to Trust

by Tess Gerritsen

  “So we start looking for him at the warehouse?”

  “I agreed to keep you informed. I didn’t say you could come with me to follow a lead. I plan to leave tomorrow night after midnight.” He actually planned to leave at eight o’clock, but he had no plans to share that information with her. He figured he’d find her sitting on the hood of his truck if she knew the real time.

  “Fine.”

  “There’s a dangerous word coming from a woman.”

  “What do you want me to say? Do you need me to beg? I will.” Her green eyes were pleading. “I want to go. I want to be included. I want to be part of this ‘sting’ or whatever you call it.”

  If he wasn’t so frustrated, he’d laugh. “There’s no sting. I’m just going on a fishing expedition.”

  “You need someone to watch your back.”

  “True.”

  She folded her arms and tapped her foot. “Okay, tell me. Who else is going with you?”

  Perceptive. “Luke. As you can see, I have all the backup I can handle.”

  “You said you’re leaving at eleven, right?”

  Was she testing him? He drew his brows together. “I’m pretty sure I said midnight. And I’m even more sure you heard me the first time.”

  “My mistake.” She turned on her heel. Before she left the room, she said, “Throw the bread into a loaf pan and turn on the oven when it’s ready.”

  * * *

  Sadie’s brain was way too active to sleep. She needed a little space to be able to think clearly and that was increasingly difficult to do with Nick around. It was all too easy to get lost when he was near. With him close, she started thinking about a future that might involve children and a husband. She knew herself better than that. Sadie would never knowingly put someone else in her situation.

  She curled on her side, trying to ignore the sounds outside her bedroom window. Her imagination could go wild with every snap of a tree branch.

  Closing her eyes did no good. All she saw were the faces of her abductors. The sounds of their voices would haunt her forever.

  She curled on her side and counted sheep. On the tenth round of that joy, she surrendered.

  What was the use?

  By six o’clock, she was ready to crawl up the walls.

  She didn’t want to go in the other room, but boredom got the best of her and she was getting hungry, too. The scent of her fresh loaf filled the air. Someone had finished the job for her.

  After getting dressed, she followed the noise coming from the kitchen hoping she’d find Nick there so she could ask him what their next steps were. She froze when she saw Lucy sitting at the table.

  In fact, no one was in the kitchen but Lucy. Well, this just got awkward.

  If Sadie turned around like she wanted to, Lucy might catch her sneaking away and that would just be embarrassing. So, she didn’t. Better face down the raging bull. Besides, she’d be out of there soon and Lucy would never have to set eyes on her again. Her heart squeezed. She would be long gone and into a new life—a life without Nick.

  “Morning.”

  “Hey.”

  Great. Didn’t seem as though Lucy wanted to talk to her any more than she wanted to talk to Lucy. “That coffee I smell?”

  “Yep. Cups are in that cabinet.” She pointed next to the sink.

  Sadie gripped a mug and shot a weak smile. “I’ll just grab a cup and get out of your way.”

  “No. Stay. We should talk.”

  Oh, glory. Sadie filled her mug and took a sip. At least she had coffee. “What’s up?”

  “Sit.” Lucy motioned to the table.

  Sadie took the seat opposite her. “Are you an officer?”

  “Yeah. It’s in the blood, I guess.”

  Could a second tick by any slower?

  Lucy leaned her weight to one side and tucked her foot underneath her. “My brother’s had it rough.”

  Should Sadie know what Lucy meant by that? She shrugged. “I’m afraid I don’t know much about him.”

  “He didn’t tell you about his past?”

  “Afraid not.” Sadie sipped the steaming brew, welcoming the burn on her lips. “Why would he?”

  Lucy’s eyes widened in surprise. “I just thought...”

  Sadie leaned back in her chair, trying not to look as if she was hanging on Lucy’s every word. The truth was she would like to know more about Nick. He already knew so much about her. She felt at a complete disadvantage.

  “Did he at least tell you why he went into law enforcement?”

  “Nope.”

  “Wow. I overestimated the situation, then.” Lucy looked even more surprised by this revelation.

  “All I know about your brother is that he works for the U.S. Marshals Service. He is my handler while I’m on the run from men who want to see me dead. But you already know that, right?” It was more statement than question.

  Lucy nodded.

  “So, if there’s something you want to tell me, I’m all ears. But I don’t like playing games.” Sadie was being bold, and she knew it. But Lucy would not intimidate her, dammit.

  Lucy’s jaw went slack. A beat passed. She sat up stiffly and said, “I knew there was something about you I liked.”

  The pair burst into laughter, shattering the tension that had been between them.

  Sadie spoke first. “If there’s something you think I should know about Nick, tell me now.”

  Chapter 10

  Lucy shifted in her seat. Her expression darkened and her gaze focused out the window. Sadness overcame her once-bright features. “I can be protective of my brothers, but especially Nick. I owe him my life.”

  Sadie leaned forward and gripped her mug with both hands. “He said you two were especially close. I can see the bond your family has. It’s sweet.”

  Lucy’s eyes brimmed with tears, but she didn’t immediately speak.

  Sadie took a sip and waited. She knew what it was like to try to recall a painful experience.

  “I don’t normally bare my soul to strangers, but my brother told me a little bit about what happened to you. I think you of all people will understand.”

  Thinking about what Grimes and his men had done to her still elicited a physical response. Her heart rate increased, and she found it hard to swallow. Sadie forced herself to stay calm. “I was in the ICU for a couple of weeks after what those jerks did to me.”

  “It takes a strong person to survive something like that. You’re really brave. I know firsthand what it takes to keep going after someone hurts you.”

  “That why you work at the sheriff’s office as a victim’s advocate?” Sadie asked, realizing her initial assessment of Lucy had been all wrong.

  Lucy nodded. “When I was young, my ex-boyfriend became obsessed with me. Didn’t think much about it at first. I was dumb enough to think it was cute. That it showed how much he cared. So I didn’t tell anyone right away. Let it go on way too long. Then, it got weird. For weeks he’d show up unexpectedly. We’d already broken up. Time to move on for me. He had other ideas.”

  “The people you care about shouldn’t want to hurt you.”

  Lucy nodded in agreement. “Tell that to a young girl. They don’t always listen.” She took a sip of coffee. “It got worse. He started threatening my guy friends and stalking me.”

  “I can’t see your brothers putting up with that.”

  “Which is exactly the reason I didn’t tell them. They’d outright hurt him, and I thought I could handle my own problems. Figured this was my fault somehow. It was on me to finish it. I had no idea what was he was truly capable of.” Tears streamed down her cheek. “Sorry. It’s been years. And, yet, it still gets to me when I think about it.”

  Sadie patted Lucy’s hand. “I can see it’s still hard to talk about it. We don’t have to keep going if you
don’t want.”

  “It’s okay. Just especially emotional lately for some reason,” Lucy said quickly. “Guess we have a lot going on in the family right now. Anyway, the experience made it hard for me to open up to anyone and especially men.”

  Anger burned Sadie’s chest. No woman deserved to be intimated by a man, but especially not a young girl. “How old were you when this all happened?”

  “Sixteen. He was my first love. I was so dumb.”

  “You were young,” Sadie corrected.

  “And stupid.”

  “Naive, maybe. But you’re not capable of being stupid.”

  Lucy half smiled, kept her gaze trained out the window. “He kidnapped me. Planned to rape me and then kill me. Said he didn’t want another boy touching me. That I belonged to him.”

  “Sounds like he was a very sick boy.”

  “I can’t believe I didn’t see it before. He was a little jealous at first. I thought it was cute. When I wanted breathing space, he got worse.”

  “You couldn’t have known. Grown women get themselves in worse situations. I hope you don’t blame yourself. You didn’t ask for any of this.” Sadie noticed a small scar above Lucy’s eye. Did that bastard do that to her?

  “I tell people the same thing all the time. Strange how hard it is to believe for yourself.” She paused a beat. “My family didn’t like him to begin with. I was being defiant, sneaking around dating him behind their backs. I should’ve listened in the first place. I could’ve saved myself a lot of heartache. He wasn’t even my type. I guess his bad-boy image hooked me. I figured he was good underneath. Learned the hard way not every person is.”

  “We all do things as teenagers we regret later. No one’s perfect. We learn. It’s part of growing up.”

  Lucy shifted her gaze to Sadie, turning the tables. “I just want you to know I understand your fears. What you went through was hell. And my brother told me it was all a mistake. You weren’t involved in any criminal activity. They grabbed the wrong woman.”

  If Lucy was trying to make Sadie feel better, she was succeeding. “Crappy things happen sometimes. We don’t always get to control everything.”

  Lucy’s ringtone sounded. She held up a finger and answered the call, lowering her voice.

  Sadie tried to block out the conversation, focusing instead out the window and on the beautiful yard.

  Lucy ended the call with, “I love you, too.” She stuffed her phone back in her pocket, turning her attention to Sadie again. “He’s the reason I finally decided to go to therapy. I don’t want to lose him.”

  “Sounds like a good guy. You better hang on to him.”

  “Yeah, he is. His name is Stephen, by the way.” Lucy sipped her coffee. She grinned. “I don’t know where you come from, but there’s no shortage of good men around here. If it weren’t for Nick...”

  “Don’t get any crazy ideas about me and your brother. I’m his work, remember?”

  Lucy held her hands up in surrender.

  “Good.” Why did her heart race at the mention of Nick?

  Seeing the warmth and love Lucy had for her brother, for all her family, hit Sadie in a deeply emotional place. She had no doubt if one Campbell was in trouble, the rest would step up. Her heart opened a little more.

  Sadie pushed aside her heavier thoughts, allowing the sun to shine through the opening in her chest. “Can I be honest with you?”

  Lucy nodded.

  “I didn’t think you liked me at all.”

  “It’s not you. I was thrown off when my brother brought another woman home. He hasn’t since his girlfriend died.”

  He didn’t say anything about that. “What happened?”

  “It was a long time ago, but to look at the way he’s still suffering you’d think it was yesterday. He doesn’t talk about it.”

  “What happened?”

  “She didn’t see her twenty-second birthday.”

  “Oh, no.” Sadie pressed her hand to her chest to stop her heart from hurting for him.

  “They hadn’t actually made their relationship official...” She cast her gaze around the room and fidgeted. “He always gets a little down this time of year because of it.”

  Talking almost seemed irreverent. Sadie let the words hang in the air.

  “She was killed by a drunk driver,” Lucy said.

  “I had no idea.” Is that why he sounded so bitter at the mention of her fiancé? Or having a family? Sadie couldn’t imagine losing the one person in the world she loved. Her heart ached for Nick. To lose his one true love. She couldn’t fathom it. And yet, hadn’t she lost hers? What she and Tom shared was different. Was it earth-shattering, world-ending love? No. Their relationship was more mature, she lied.

  Had she been sad when she’d walked away from Tom?

  Of course.

  Heartbroken?

  No.

  This explained a lot about Nick’s reactions. Was it also the reason he broke protocol to collect her things in Creek Bend? He understood loss.

  Nick obviously held his emotions inside. Had he learned to do that when he was a kid, watching his mom suffer?

  * * *

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “He was a mess for a while. Got out of the military when his time was up, and eventually got his head screwed on straight again. Started dating. He’s been out with lots of women since then. No one seems to measure up to her. I haven’t heard about him seeing anyone in the past year. I was afraid he’d given up. Even though she died years ago, he’s never been the same—”

  The sounds of feet landing on the tile floor stopped Lucy midsentence. She stood and half smiled. “I’ll catch up with you later.”

  “Morning.” Nick grunted the word as he passed Lucy on his way to the coffeepot. Boomer trailed behind, wagging his tail as if he were home.

  Nick’s black hair was tousled and he wasn’t wearing a shirt.

  Sadie’s heart squeezed. She stood and walked to the back door, making kissing noises at her dog as she opened it. “C’mon, Boomer. You need to go outside.”

  He trotted past her unceremoniously.

  She followed him. Not because she had to stand over him while he did his business, but because she needed air. Her heart ached for Nick, for his tragic loss. Maybe he did understand the feeling of losing everything.

  She breathed in the crisp air, inviting it into her soul.

  The grass glistened, still wet from the storm. The birds chirped their morning songs. The sun, a warm glow, rose just above the trees. Everything about the ranch was perfection. How could a place she’d never been before feel so much like home?

  This must be what heaven is like.

  Or maybe it was the love she felt from the moment she saw the Campbells together. Even though Luke teased Nick that first night in the truck, she felt an unspoken, unbreakable bond between the brothers. She imagined they could get away with teasing each other, but let someone else try. No doubt they’d rally for one serious fight.

  A little piece of her heart opened.

  Being on a ranch seemed to suit Boomer, too. He ran toward the fence and then cut a hard left a second before crashing into it.

  The place wasn’t extravagant. The barn needed a good coat of paint. And yet, it was a beautiful, serene place.

  This would have been a great place to grow up.

  Boomer returned to her side with a stick clenched in his teeth.

  He dropped it at her feet. She picked it up, red paint dotting her fingers. No. Not red paint. She examined the stains closer, fanning out her fingers...blood. She released her grip on the stick, sending it tumbling to the ground.

  Boomer lurched toward it.

  “Leave it.” The command came out harsher than she’d planned.

  He froze.

  She kicked the stick, launching
it into the air while distracting Boomer with kissing noises.

  She scanned the tree line, the barn, the fence. Her heart jackhammered her ribs with painful stabs.

  Where’d the blood come from? Boomer’s mouth? Maybe the stick had jabbed his gums and caused them to bleed. She bent down to get a better look in his mouth and opened his jaw flaps. “You okay, boy?”

  She examined her fingers. His saliva mixed with blood. “Did you cut your gums with that stick?”

  Her warning bells sounded. She stood and glanced around one more time, ignoring the chill racing up her spine. Could someone be out there? Waiting for the right moment to strike?

  The explanation was right in front of her, on her hand. The sight of blood still goose bumped her flesh.

  She opened the door to see Nick standing near the coffeemaker. Seeing him there had a similar effect to feeling morning sunshine on her face.

  The door creaked closed behind her and she turned long enough to lock it.

  “Everything okay?” Nick asked, studying her expression.

  “Yeah. Fine.” She didn’t want to tell him every shadow made her jump. Being cautious was one thing. Letting her fear get the best of her was something totally different. She washed her hands and poured a bowl of water for Boomer before setting it on the floor. “I need to pick up dog food. Anything around here he can eat until I can get to a store?”

  “I can make a trip into town later. I’ll find something for him in the meantime.” He turned and searched the pantry. A minute later, he poked his head out. “The bread turned out to be pretty amazing. I had to fight my brothers to save a piece for you.” He pointed to the counter by the stove. “I missed waking up to that smell first thing in the morning.”

  A chunk had been neatly wrapped for her and placed on the kitchen island.

  Sadie peeled open the Saran wrap and took a bite after pouring a fresh cup of coffee. “You finished it?”

  “We make a good team.” Nick stepped out of the pantry. “Nothing in there for our boy to eat.”

  She liked the sound of the words our boy.

  Luke strolled in, rubbing his eyes. “I’m going in this morning for supplies. What do you need?”