That Stick ...

by Charlotte Mary Yonge

  For all answer, Eden held up a little wooden spade, a sailor hat, and a shoe showing traces of sand and sea-water.

  ‘It is so then,’ said Lady Adela. ‘Oh, his mother! But,’ after that one wail, she thought of the poor woman before her, ‘I am sure you are not to blame, Eden.’

  p. 217‘Oh, my lady, if I could but feel that! But that I should have trusted the darling out of my sight for a moment!’

  Presently they brought her to a state in which she could tell her lamentable history.

  She had been spending the afternoon at Mr. Rollstone’s, leaving Master Michael as usual in the care of the underling, Ellen, and after that she knew no more till neither child nor maid came home at his supper-time, and Mrs. Morton was slowly roused to take alarm, while Eden, half distracted, wandered about, seeking her charge, and found Ellen, calling and shouting in vain for him. Ellen confessed that she had seen him running after the Lincoln children, and supposing him with them, had given herself up to the study of a penny dreadful in company with another young nursemaid. When they had awakened to real life, the first idea had been that he must be with these children; but they were gone, and Ellen, fancying that he might have gone home with them, asked at their lodging, but no, he was not there.

  The tide was by this time covering the beach, and driving away the miserable maids, with the aunt, cousin and others who had been on the fruitless quest. No more could be done then, and they went home with desolation in their hearts. Miss Ida, as Eden declared, stayed out long after everybody else when it was clearly of no use, and came back so tired and upset that she went up straight to bed. There was still a hope that some one might have met the little boy and taken him home, unable clearly to make out to whom he p. 218belonged, more especially as the Lincolns in terror and compunction had confessed that they had seen him and his nurse from a distance, and had rushed headlong round a projecting rock into a cove, hoping that he had not seen them, because he was so tiresome and spoilt all their games. And when that morning the spade, hat, and shoe were discovered upon the shore, not far from the very rock, the poor children had to draw plenty of morals on the consequences of selfishness. No doubt that poor little Michael had pursued them barefooted and gone too near the waves!

  There was nothing more but the forlorn hope that the waves would restore the little body they had carried off, and Mrs. Morton was watching for that last sad satisfaction. In case of that contingency, Ellen, as the last person known to have seen the boy, had been left at Westhaven, in agonies of despair, vowing that she would never speak to any one, nor look at a story-book again in her life. She had attempted the excuse that she thought she saw Miss Ida going in that direction, but the young lady had declared that she had never been on the beach at all that afternoon till after the alarm had been given; and had been extremely angry with Ellen for making false excuses and trying to shift off the blame, and the girl had been much terrified, and owned that she was not at all sure.

  ‘And oh, my lady,’ entreated Eden, ‘don’t send me up to the House! Don’t make me face her ladyship! I should die of it!’

  ‘We must think what is to be done about that,’ p. 219said Lady Adela. ‘Can you tell whether any one from the House has seen you?’

  Eden thought not, and after she had been consigned to her friend, Lady Adela’s maid, to be rested, fed, and comforted as far as might be possible, the sisters-in-law held sad counsel, and agreed that it was not safe to keep back the terrible news from the poor mother who expected daily tidings of her child, and might hear some report, in spite of her shut-up state.

  ‘Poor Adela, I pity you almost as much as her,’ said Bertha.

  ‘Oh, I know now how much I have to be thankful for! No uncertainty—and my little one’s grave.’

  ‘Besides Amice. Let me drive you up, Addie. Your heart is beating enough to knock you down.’

  ‘Well, I believe it is. But not up to the front door. I will go in by the garden. Oh, may he be spared to her at least!’

  Very pale then Lady Adela crept in, meeting a weeping maid who was much relieved to see her, but was hardly restrained from noisy sobs. Mr. Trotman, she said, had come just before the garden boy had inevitably dashed up with the tidings, and the household had been waiting till he came out, to secure that he should be near when Lady Northmoor was told.

  Adela felt that this might be the safest opportunity, and sent a message to the door to beg that her ladyship would come and speak to her for a few minutes in the study.

  Mary’s soft step was soon there, and her lips p. 220were framing the words, ‘No ground lost,’ when at sight of Adela’s face the light went out of her eyes, and setting herself firmly on her feet, she said, ‘You have bad news. My boy!’

  Adela came near and would have taken her hand, saying—‘My poor Mary’—but she clasped them both as if to hold herself together, and said, ‘The fever!’

  ‘No, no—sadder still! Drowned!’

  ‘Ah, then there was not all that suffering, and without me! Thankworthy— Oh no, no, please’—as Lady Adela, with eyes brimming over, would have pressed her to her bosom—‘don’t—don’t upset me, or I could not attend to Frank. It all turns on this one day, they say, and I must—I must be as usual. There will be time enough to know all about it—if’—with a long oppressed gasp—‘he is saved from the hearing it.’

  ‘I think you are right, dear,’ said Adela, ‘if you keep him—’ but she could not go on.

  ‘Well, any way,’ said Mary, ‘either he will be given back, or he will be saved this. Let me go back to him, please.’ Then at the door, putting her hand to her head—‘Who is here?’

  ‘Poor Eden.’

  ‘Ah, let her and Emma know that I am sure it is not their fault. Come again to-morrow, please; I think he will be better.’

  She went away in that same gliding manner, perfectly tearless. Adela waited to see the doctor, who assured her that the patient had rather gained than lost during the last twenty-four hours, and that if he could be spared from any shock or p. 221agitation he would probably recover. Lady Northmoor seemed so entirely absorbed by his critical state, that she was not likely to betray the sad knowledge she had put aside in the secret chamber of her heart, more especially as her husband was still too much weighed down, and too slumberous to be observant, or to speak much, and knowing the child to be out of the house, he did not inquire for him.

  Nevertheless, Mr. Trotman gladly approved of Lady Adela’s intention of sleeping in the house in case of any sudden collapse; and the servants, who were not to let Lady Northmoor know, evidently felt this a great relief.

  ‘Yes, it is a comfort to think some one will be within that poor thing’s reach,’ said Bertha, as they went back together, ‘and, if you can bear it, you are the right person.’

  ‘She will not let herself dwell on it. She never even looked at Mrs. Morton’s letter.’

  ‘And I really hope they won’t find the poor little dear, to have all the fuss and heart-rending.’

  ‘Oh, Birdie!’

  ‘There’s only one thing that would make me wish it. I’m quite sure that that Miss Ida knows more about it than she owns. No, you need not say, “Oh, Birdie” again; I don’t suspect her of the deed, but I do believe she saw the boy and kept out of his way, and now wants that poor Ellen to have all the blame!’

  ‘You will believe nothing against a girl out of an orphanage!’

  ‘I had rather any day believe Ellen Mole than p. 222Ida Morton. There’s something about that girl which has always revolted me. I would never trust her farther than I could see her!’

  ‘Prejudice, Birdie; because she is in bad style.’

  ‘You to talk of prejudice, Addie, who hardly knew how to go on living here under the poor stick!’

  ‘Don’t, Birdie. He has earned esteem by sheer goodness. Poor man, I don’t know what to wish for him when I think of the pang that awaits him.’

  ‘You know what to wish for yourself and Northmoor! Not but that Herbert
may come to good if he doesn’t come into possession for many a long year.’

  ‘And now I must write to that poor child, Constance. But oh, Bertha, don’t condemn hastily! Haven’t I had enough of that?’

  p. 223CHAPTER XXXIII

  DARKNESS

  Full a week later, Frank looked up from his pillow, and said, ‘I wonder when it will be safe to have Mite back. Mary, sweet, what is it? I have been sure something was burthening you. Come and tell me. If he has the fever, you must go to him. No!’ as she clasped his hand and laid her face down on the pillow.

  ‘Ah, Frank, he does not want us any more!’

  ‘My Mary, my poor Mary, have you been bearing such knowledge about with you? For how long?’

  ‘Since that worst day, yesterday week. Oh, but to see you getting better was the help!’

  ‘Can you tell me?’

  She told him, in that low, steady voice, all she knew. It was very little, for she had avoided whatever might break the composure that seemed so needful to his recovery; and he could listen quietly, partly from the lulling effect of weakness, partly from his anxiety for her, and the habit of self-restraint, in which all the earlier part of their p. 224lives had been passed, made utterance come slowly to them.

  ‘Life will be different to us henceforth,’ he once said. ‘We have had three years of the most perfect happiness. He gave and He hath taken away. Blessed—’

  And there he stopped, for he saw the working of her face. Otherwise they hardly spoke of their loss even to one another. It went down deeper than they could bear to utter, and their hearts and eyes met if their lips did not. Only Lord Northmoor lay too dejected to make the steps expected in the recovery of strength for a few days after the grievous revelation, and on the day when at last he was placed on a couch by the window, his wife collapsed, and, almost unconscious, was carried to her bed.

  It was not a severe or alarming attack, and all she wanted was to be let alone; but there was enough of sore throat and other symptoms to prolong the quarantine, and Lady Adela could no longer be excluded from giving her aid. She went to and fro between the patients, and comforted each with regard to the other, telling the one how her husband’s strength was returning, and keeping the other tranquil by the assurance that what his wife most needed was perfect rest, especially from the necessity of restraining herself. Those eyes showed how many tears were poured forth when they could have their free course. Lady Adela had gone through enough to feel with ready tact what would be least jarring to each. She had persuaded Bertha to go back to London, both to her many avocations and to receive p. 225Amice, who must still be kept at a distance for some time.

  Lord Northmoor, as soon as he had strength and self-command for it, read poor Mrs. Morton’s letters, and also saw Eden, for whom there was little fear of infection. She managed to tell her history and answer all his questions in detail, but she quite broke down under his kind tone of forgiveness and assurance that no blame attached to her, and that he was only grateful to her for her tender care of his child, and she went away sobbing pitifully.

  Adela came back, after taking her from the room, where Frank was sitting in an easy-chair by the window, and looking out on the summer garden, which seemed to be stripped of all its charm and value for him.

  ‘Poor thing,’ she said, ‘she is quite overcome by your kindness.’

  ‘I do not think any one is more to be pitied,’ said he.

  ‘No, indeed, but she wishes you would have heard what she had to say about the supposing Ida to have gone in that direction.’

  ‘I thought it better not. It would not have exonerated the poor little maid from carelessness, and there is no use in fostering a sense of injury or suspicion, when what is done cannot be undone,’ he said wearily.

  ‘Indeed you are quite right,’ said Adela earnestly. ‘You know how to be in charity with all men. Oh, the needless misery of hasty unjust suspicions!’ Then as he looked up at her—‘Do you know our own story?’

  p. 226‘Only the main facts.’

  ‘I think you ought to know it. It accounts for so much!’ said she, moved partly by the need of utterance, and partly by the sense that the turn of his thoughts might be good for him. ‘You know what a passion for horses there has always been in this family.’

  ‘I know—I could have had it if my life had begun more prosperously.’

  ‘And you have done your best to save Herbert from it. Well, my Arthur had it to a great degree; and so indeed had Bertha. They were brought up to nothing else; Bertha was, I really think, a better judge than her brother, she was not so reckless. They became intimate with a Captain Alder, who was in the barracks at Copington—much the nicest, as I used to think, of the set, though I was not very glad to see an attachment growing up between him and Bertha. There was always such a capacity of goodness in her that I longed to see her in the way of being raised altogether.’

  ‘She has always been most kind to us. There is much to admire in her.’

  ‘Her present life has developed all that is best; but—’ She hesitated, wondering whether the good simple man were sensible of that warp in the nature that she had felt. She went on, ‘Then she was a masterful, high-spirited girl, to whom it seemed inevitable to come to high words with any one about whom she cared. And I must say—she and my husband, while they were passionately fond of one another, seemed to have a sort of fascination in provoking one another, not only in words but in deeds. p. 227Ah, you can hardly believe it of her! How people get tamed! Well, Arthur bought a horse, a beautiful creature, but desperately vicious. Captain Alder had been with him when he first saw it, and admired it; but I do not think gave an opinion against it. Bertha, however, from the moment she saw its eyes and ears, protested against it in her vehement way. I remember imploring her not to make Arthur defy her; but really when they got into those moods, I don’t think they could stop themselves, and she thought Captain Alder encouraged him. So Arthur went out on that fatal drive in the dog-cart, and no sooner were they out on the Colbeam road than the horse bolted, they came into collision with a hay waggon. And—’

  ‘I know!’

  ‘Captain Alder was thrown on the top of the hay and not hurt. He came to prepare me to receive Arthur, and then went up to the house. Bertha, poor girl, in her wild grief almost flew at him. It was all his doing, she said; he had egged Arthur on; she supposed Arthur had bets. In short, she knew not what she said; but he left the house, and never has been near her again.’

  ‘Were they engaged?’

  ‘Not quite formally, but they understood one another, and were waiting for a favourable moment with old Lord Northmoor, who was not easy to deal with, and it was far from being a good match anyway. We all thought, I believe, that the drive was the fault or rather the folly of Captain Alder, and Arthur was too ill to explain—unconscious at first—then not rousing himself. At last he asked p. 228for his friend, and then he told me that Captain Alder had done all in his power to prevent his taking the creature out—had told him he had no right to endanger his life; and when only laughed at, had insisted on going with him, in hopes, I suppose, of averting mischief. I wrote—Lord Northmoor wrote to him at his quarters; but our letters came back to us. We had kept no watch on the gazette, and he had retired and left no address with his brother-officers. Bertha knew that his parents were dead, and that he had a sister at school at Clifton. I wrote to her, but the mistress sent back my letter; and we found that he had fetched away his sister and gone. Even his money was taken from Coutts’s, as if to cut off any clue.’

  ‘He should not have so attended to a girl in her angry grief.’

  ‘No, but I think there was some self-blame in him, though not about that horse. I believe he thought he might have checked Arthur more. And he had debts which he seems to have paid on selling out his capital. So, as I have told poor Bertha whenever she would let me, there may have been other reasons besides her stinging words.’

  ‘And it has preyed on her?’

  �
��More than any one would guess who had not known her in old times. I was glad that you secured that child, Cea, to her. She seems to have fastened her affections on her.’

  ‘Alder,’ presently repeated Frank. ‘Alder—I was thinking how the name had come before me. There were some clients of ours—of Mr. Burford’s, I mean—of that name; I think they sold an estate. p. 229Some day I will find out whether he knows anything about them, and I shall remember more by and by.’

  ‘It would be an immense relief if you could find out anything good about the poor fellow,’ said Adela, very glad to have found any topic of interest, and pleased to find that it occupied his thoughts afterwards, when he asked whether she knew the Christian name of this young man, without mentioning any antecedent, as if he had been going on with the subject all the time.

  In a few days the pair were able to meet, and to take up again the life over which a dark veil had suddenly descended, contrasting with the sunshine of those last few years. To hold up one another, and do their duty on their way to the better world, was evidently the one thought, though they said little.

  Still neither was yet in a condition to return to ordinary life, and it was determined that as soon as they were disinfected, they should leave the house to undergo the same process, and spend a few weeks at some health resort. Only Mary shuddered at the notion of hearing the sound of the sea, and Malvern was finally fixed upon. Lady Adela would go with them, and she wrote to beg that Constance, so soon as her term was over, might bring Amice thither, to be in a separate lodging at first, till there had been time to see whether the little girl’s company would be a solace or a trial to the bereaved parents.

  Bertha, as soon as the chief anxiety was over, joined Mrs. Bury in a mountaineering expedition. She declared that she had never dared to leave Cea before, lest the wretched father, now proved to be a myth, should come and abstract the child.

  p. 230CHAPTER XXXIV

  THE PHANTOM OF THE STATION