Waylaid

by Ruth J. Hartman

  I angled a wary glance toward Addy and the bear. “Well? What did he say?”

  “Fuzzy.”

  I shook my head. “Not much better than Gah.”

  “It’s his choice. The name sticks.”

  “Poor unfortunate beast.” I reached over like I’d meant to take Addy’s hand and grabbed the bear’s paw instead.

  Addy tilted her head and looked down. “Uh, Graham, something you want to tell me?”

  “Hmmm?” I bit the inside of my cheek so I wouldn’t lose it.

  “You and Fuzzy are holding… uh hands, paws, whatever.”

  With a loud gasp, I let go of the bear’s paw as if I’d been burned. “Oh, my mistake!”

  Addy’s snort was so loud, I think people five miles away were startled. “You are a nut!”

  “Thank you very kindly.” Making jokes had always been my defense in tough situations. If I kept making Addy laugh, would this evening be any less painful? Somehow I didn’t think so.

  Just as total darkness fell, we reached our spot on Love Road. The little dirt path tucked just inside a curve in the road was a good place to be alone. It was out in the country, so there weren’t any street lights and hardly anyone ever drove it at night. Only a handful of houses dotted the whole road which was several miles long.

  I turned off the ignition, suddenly unsure of what to say.

  “Graham, thank you again for the bear. I’ll treasure him.”

  I swallowed, my throat dry. “You’re… welcome. Think he would mind sitting behind the seat for a while?”

  She shook her head and tucked the bear behind my seat. When she turned back, her eyes glistened. “This is so hard… tonight.”

  “Yep.”

  “I can’t believe how fast the time has gone.”

  “I know.” I reached for her hand and rubbed my thumb over her soft skin. “Are you nervous? For tomorrow?” I had to talk about something or I’d go crazy with the silence.

  “Yeah, a little, but also…”

  “What?” That you’re going to miss me?

  “I’m excited too.”

  Excited? “Oh.”

  “I can’t wait to meet Amber.”

  And all the guys on campus? “I’m sure she’s nice.”

  “She seems to be.”

  “Is that all you’re excited about?”

  She sighed. “I can’t wait to see my room and start my classes.”

  I ran my thumb over her wrist and felt the rapid pounding of her pulse. She really was excited. But how could that be? She was leaving me. “I hope you’re very… happy there.” I cleared my throat. Why was I having so much trouble just getting air into my lungs?

  Addy let go of my hand and undid her seat belt and then mine. “I won’t be completely happy.”

  I wrapped her in my arms. “You won’t?” Say it… please.

  “How could I? When I won’t be with you?”

  Don’t go… stay with me. “That’s sweet of you to say.”

  “It’s the truth, Graham. You don’t know how torn I am. I want this, to go to school, be on my own. But…”

  “What?” I brushed her hair over her shoulder, trying to memorize how soft the dark strands were, how they felt between my fingers.

  She wrapped her arms around my neck and tugged me close. “I don’t want to leave you. It’s breaking my heart.”

  “Then don’t…” The words had escaped. Words I’d never meant for her to hear.

  “Don’t… what? Don’t go? I have to.”

  I nuzzled my face in her hair, just as she’d done to the bear. “You don’t have to Addy. You have a choice.”

  She pulled away, a frown marring her perfect features. “You don’t understand, Graham. This is my dream.”

  “But you are mine, Addy.”

  “You’re mine, too. Don’t you know that?”

  “You can’t have everything. It doesn’t work that way.”

  “What are you saying?” A single tear traveled a course straight for her chin. “Are you… are you breaking up with—”

  “No. Oh, honey, no.” I pulled her close again. “I just meant that… once you leave here, leave me, nothing will be the same.”

  She sighed and tucked her head under my chin, running her fingers across my chest. “I know. It’s confusing.”

  I nodded. “Sure is.”

  “I wish you were going with me.”

  I chuckled. “And just what would I do all day when you were in class? Hang out with Fuzzy the bear?”

  “You could always take classes too.”

  “I told you, I tried it once and it didn’t stick.”

  “Maybe if there was something you wanted to do. Last time you said you only went to play ball. Maybe if there were some classes you—”

  “No, Addy.” I placed a finger over her lips. “Let’s not waste tonight talking about tomorrow. It will be here sooner than we think. Can we just enjoy tonight? Make some sweet memories?”

  She lowered her gaze to where her hands pressed against my chest and nodded. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

  “Nothing to be sorry about. I just don’t want us to argue.”

  “We weren’t arguing.”

  “And let’s keep it that way. I know you’re pretty tough, Addy, but I think I could take you in a fight.”

  That did it. She giggled. “Pretty sure of yourself, huh?”

  “I have my moments.” I lifted her chin with my fingers and pressed my lips to hers, begging my mind to capture every second of tonight so I would have it to replay in my thoughts later on.

  I was struck with an urgency I’d never felt before. The way Addy’s hands grasped the front of my shirt made me think she felt it too. I knew I’d see her again. Hopefully soon. But somehow, I couldn’t convince myself of that. It was as if I had to touch her, taste her, because it would be the very last time.

  I undid the first few buttons of her blouse and then pulled her close and slid my hands under her shirt over her bare back. “Your skin is so soft.” I kissed her shoulder and nibbled on her collarbone. I let my hands wander down between us and cupped her breast through her shirt. The warmth from her skin, even through her clothes, nearly did me in.

  “Fuzzy is giving me lessons on how to be soft and cuddly.”

  “Is that so?” I walked my fingers down her stomach.

  “He has a dark secret though.”

  “What’s that?”

  “He really wants to try on my clothes. Especially my bra.” She let out a sigh. “I’m afraid to tell him that it won’t fit him, though. He’s not my size.”

  I eyed the bear and then her chest. “Uh, no. He’s not. But that works. I ain’t planning on doing this to him.” I lowered my head and kissed the skin right above the lace on her bra.

  She gasped.

  I studied her face, making sure she was okay with what I was doing. She blinked and touched my cheek. “Graham, I love you so much.”

  “I love you too, sweetheart.” I pulled her close again and kissed her, tilting my head a little and playing my tongue against hers. The heat coming from her mouth drove me wild.

  “How am I going to… leave you?”

  “Oh, Addy. I know…”

  I pulled her onto my lap and stroked her back, making slow, lazy circles across her damp skin. “We’ll just have to figure out some way to… stay together.”

  She wrapped her arms around my middle and pressed the side of her face to my chest. “Of course… of course we’ll stay together. Do you doubt that we will?”

  I swallowed hard. Wasn’t this the question that had been eating at me? The one that I’d been avoiding? The thought had been hovering around me, but I’d just kept shoving it away, not wanting to even go there.

  Now, though, it had shown its face, and it wasn’t going to slink away.

  “Addy, I want us to… It’s going to be hard with you there and me here.”

  She pulled away and took my face between her hands. “Graham, are you
worried that I’ll forget you?”

  I didn’t want to answer. Didn’t want her to know the truth, so I kept quiet.

  She kissed me hard and then looked at me straight in the eye. “Graham, I love you with my whole heart. I’ve never loved anyone like this before. Please know, please know, that I will not forget you. I will not find anyone to replace you. You are mine and I am yours. Forever. Got that?”

  I nodded and let out a long breath. “You’re my life too, Addy. I just… I’m going to miss you so much.”

  She sighed and pulled me close again. “I’m going to miss you too. You don’t know how much.”

  My heart cried out, yes, I do…

  Chapter Nineteen

  Addy

  The ride to Purdue went fast. I’d spent the whole time talking to my parents from the back seat. When I wasn’t talking to them, I thought of Graham. Last night with him seemed like a long time ago. Was he really afraid that I would forget him? Find someone else? It wasn’t possible. He was the one for me. No doubts. It sounded crazy, to be so sure after not knowing him that long, but I was one hundred percent certain.

  If he had asked me to marry him before I left, I would have said yes.

  That wouldn’t work. You’re going away to college.

  We would have worked it out. With love, there’d have been a way. There had to be a way. The realization of what I was doing, leaving him behind, hit me hard when my dad stopped the car in front of my dorm. Several other vehicles were parked along the street, unloading suitcases, boxes, and small appliances.

  Mom turned in her seat to look at me. “Well, this is it, kid. Ready?”

  I nodded, though my heart ached to say goodbye to them. Wasn’t this what I wanted? What I had wanted for months? To leave town? Get away?

  I knew that over time I would get used to being away from them. That was how it was supposed to work. Kids grew up and went their own way.

  But it was different leaving Graham. That felt wrong. My heart, suddenly as fragile as a butterfly’s wing, lurched in my chest. This was only the first day of being apart from him. How was I going to do this?

  I jumped when Dad opened my door. “Addy? You all set?”

  I smiled, more to reassure me than him. “Yep. Let’s do it.” I climbed out and grabbed my suitcase, then led the way inside the building. “My room is on the eighth floor, so they told me we’d have to use the elevator to floor six and then walk up the last two flights.”

  The elevator doors opened and a girl walked out holding hands with a guy. My breathing sped up. Was I going to have this reaction every time I saw a guy and girl together? I stepped inside and held the door back with my hand until my mom and dad got on with their boxes.

  None of us said anything on the ride up. Why did people do that? Not talk on elevators? It was like it was a law or something. A loud ding preceded the doors opening and we stepped out.

  Mom pointed to my left. “There’re the stairs, Addy.”

  “Okay.” I glanced around until I spotted a reception area. “Would you mind going on up to room 801 while I get my entrance packet?”

  “Sure, honey.” They headed for the stairs. I followed two other girls who were walking to the reception desk. After they were finished, I stepped up.

  “Name?” The girl behind the desk glanced up.

  “Addy Lafollette.”

  She searched through the large box of envelopes. “I have an Adelaide Lafollette.”

  “Yes. That’s me.”

  “Okay. Here ya go.” She handed it over. “Welcome to Prescott Hall.”

  “Thanks.” I headed for the stairs and lugged my heavy suitcase up behind me. I was winded by the time I got two floors up. Guess I’ll be getting a lot of exercise with these steps every day and walking all over campus.

  When I reached my room, the door was standing open. I could hear my dad talking to someone.

  Excitement warred with nerves as I stepped inside the room. “Amber?”

  “Addy!” She rushed forward and hugged me. “It’s so nice to finally meet you!”

  I caught my parents give each other a smile, as if they knew I would be fine with at least one friend on campus.

  “Addy,” Mom ran her hand down my arm. “Why don’t you stay and get acquainted with Amber and decide where you want to put your stuff? Dad and I will go get the rest.”

  I frowned. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.” Dad touched my shoulder. “We’ll be right back. All right?”

  “Thanks.” I watched them leave and then regarded Amber. “Can you believe we’re really here?”

  Amber spun her dark red ponytail around her finger. “I know. It’s wild.” She pointed behind her. “I didn’t claim a bed yet, ’cause I wanted to see which one you wanted.”

  How sweet. “I don’t care, really.”

  “No, you pick, Addy.”

  I eyed both beds. “All right. If you don’t mind, I’ll take the one by the window? Are you okay sleeping by the door?”

  “Yeah, the noise in the hall won’t bother me. I can sleep through anything.”

  “Great.” I set my suitcase down in front of the dresser closest to my bed.

  My bed. How weird. My family had lived in the same house my whole life, so I’d only had one bed, one room. And since my sister was so much older than me, I’d never even shared a room before.

  Amber came over and sat on my bed. “So did you have trouble saying goodbye to your boyfriend? I’m sorry, I forget his name.”

  “Graham. And yeah, it was brutal.”

  “Me, too. For a while there, I wasn’t sure I could do it, ya know?”

  “Yeah, I do.”

  A rustling sound caught my attention and I turned toward the door. Mom and Dad were back. “Here let me help.” I hurried over to them and smiled when Amber came to help too.

  I took a large box from my mom and set it down. How was I going to fit all my stuff into half of this small room?

  Dad pushed in a dolly that held a small dorm sized fridge from my brother. Amber’s eyes rounded. “A fridge? Cool!”

  I laughed. “And of course, you can use it, too. I figure my stuff is your stuff.”

  She put her arm around my waist. “Same goes for me.” She pointed to a blender. “I happen to have a weakness for milkshakes.”

  Mom nodded. “You girls are going to get along just fine.”

  My parents helped get my stuff situated on my side of the room. “Hey,” I said, “I can do the rest myself later.”

  Mom took my hand. “Are you sure? Maybe we should—”

  Dad wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Honey, I think it’s time to go.”

  Mom bit her lip and nodded. “I guess so.” She stepped forward and hugged me. “You’ll be fine, Addy. Have fun and study hard. And…” she lowered her voice, “remember what we talked about… with Graham.”

  I nodded. “I will. I love you.”

  “Love you, too.” She stepped aside.

  Dad gave me a great big bear hug. “I’m so proud of you, kid, sticking to the plan. Kick some tail while you’re here, got it?”

  I nodded. “I will.” He kissed my cheek, told me he loved me, and grabbed my mom’s hand to pull her out of the room. And just like that, they were gone.

  I blinked hard, surprised that I was so emotional. “Well, that was weird.”

  Amber, who had stayed on her bed while we said goodbye, nodded. “Yeah, it was the same for me. I didn’t think it would be so hard to tell them goodbye. But it was. Nothing like…”

  “Saying goodbye to your boyfriend?”

  Tears pooled along her lower lashes. “Uh-huh.”

  I went to her, sitting next to her on the bed. I took her hand. “At least we have each other, right? We can commiserate about how much we miss them.”

  She wiped a tear from her cheek. “I’m glad you’re here, Addy.”

  “Me, too. Ya know what? I can always put my stuff away later. Feel like checking out the campus?”r />
  “Sounds good.”

  Amber locked our room with her key and I slipped mine in my purse. After taking the stairs and the elevator, we walked through the main lobby of the building. The doors were propped open, as several students were still moving in. A bunch of guys walked past us, carrying boxes and bags. There weren’t any girls with them.

  I grabbed Amber’s arm. “Do guys live in our dorm too?”

  “Yep. My mom wasn’t too thrilled, but she felt better when I told her that we’re not on the same floor.”

  I grimaced. Graham wouldn’t be thrilled to find that out.

  The day had turned cloudy, but a warm breeze swept by. We walked down a short street that fronted our building and turned right onto a main street. The campus was beautiful and would be even prettier when the leaves started to change in a few weeks.

  A few weeks… How soon would I see Graham again?

  Addy you just got here.

  But I miss him already.

  My throat tightened until I thought I might not be able to even breathe.

  Truth was, I missed him before we’d even said goodbye. I knew it would be hard, but I had no idea my chest would actually hurt when I was here and he was still at home.

  A whistle came from a carload of guys. I ignored them.

  Amber looked their way and then at me. “There are so many guys here. I’m from a really small school so I’m not used to so many.”

  “Same here.”

  “Are you… worried, you know, that you’ll…” Her voice trailed off, but I knew exactly what she meant.

  “Graham and I had that talk last night.” Was it only last night? “I think he was a little afraid that I would forget him and find someone here, but I told him that wouldn’t happen. Why? Are you worried about it?”

  Amber gave a one-sided shrug. “Part of me is scared that Harmon will find someone else while I’m gone.”

  “Do you really think so?”

  “I hope not.”

  I didn’t know what else to say to her. How could I reassure her when I barely knew her and had never met her boyfriend?

  It’s different for you, though, Addy. You and Graham are tight. Nothing will tear you apart.

  Right?

  Chapter Twenty

  Graham

  My cell phone rang. I ripped off my work gloves to get it from my pocket. “Hello?”