A Brave New Life

by Kelly Anne Bruce

  She was not surprised by the ladies and gentlemen she had invited. They were all fun and happy, not a gossip among them. Diana appreciated the fact that she could enjoy herself without the worry of being insulted or having something twisted into rumours to be spread around town the next week.

  "Have you been enjoying the Season? It seems as though I have not seen you in some time.” Matthew looked at her and raised an eyebrow in question.

  "Yes, it has been some time.” Diana had not expected him to have noticed the time as acutely as she had. “I was feeling ill this last week and skipped many of my social engagements."

  “I am most sorry to hear you were feeling unwell. It is a relief to see that you were feeling well enough to attend tonight.” He laid out his cards.

  “Yes, thank you.” She played her cards as well. “I have to admit that Lady Henrietta’s invitation hastened my recovery.”

  He turned to look at her. “Something to look forward to?”

  Mr Repington had no idea how right he was. “In a way it was, I had been upset about some rumours that had been floating about regarding myself and Mr Crandall. Your sister’s invitation was a great distraction from that.”

  “I imagine so.” He stared intently at his cards. “I found the rumour to be distressing as well.”

  Diana hoped she understood his meaning. “It is my hope that if I stay far away from Mr Crandall for the remainder of the Season the idle gossip will cease to be interesting.”

  “Just the Season?” Matthew placed a card on the table.

  Diana shuddered. “I would rather not see him ever again but that seemed overly rude to point out at the start. I would hate to seem unkind about another human being.”

  Mr Repington looked over and smiled. “Some truths can be difficult to speak.”

  “I believe that, too.” Diana could barely look away from him. She had not noticed how green his eyes were, she supposed that his green coat made it more pronounced. She looked down at her cards realizing it was her turn. “Is that something you learned in your studies?”

  “Yes, although it was something I have understood for a long time When you have five siblings you learn quite a bit just from being in the same household.” He seemed to hesitate, so she waited. “It did indeed assist me in my path to the clergy though.”

  Diana wondered if he hesitated because of his calling or because of his remark about his siblings. “Your sister said that you had taken your vows. That is quite commendable.”

  “Thank you. I have been appointed to a position in Whitehall."

  Diana placed another card on the table. "I understand Whitehall is in the north, is that correct?"

  "Quite right, near Manchester."

  "It sounds quite lovely. I grow tired of London rather quickly each Season.” Diana stared across the room. “I should like to live somewhere quiet. Whitehall must be wonderful in the spring."

  “More than beautiful, I would say.” Diana looked back to see that he had been looking at her when he spoke. "Are you quite sure?"

  Diana did not look away. "Oh yes, Mr Repington, I am quite sure."

  “Matthew.” He smiled and blinked slowly. “Please call me, Matthew.”

  “Matthew,” she said and stopped, she liked how it sounded. “Matthew, I have never been so sure of anything in my life.”

  “I understand. I am feeling the same certainty.”

  A moment later the drawing room door opened the Duke and Duchess of Castborough appeared followed by the parents of many of the card players including Miss Diana’s.

  Her mother’s face had barely registered her disapproval before Lady Henrietta had stood up and announced, "All right, everyone! It is time to switch tables. Players to whom I gave an extra card please switch tables."

  Matthew stood up and nodded at Miss Diana. “It was a pleasure, Miss Diana.”

  “Yes, thank you.” He walked away before she even finished speaking.

  He and several others changed tables as though Lady Henrietta’s instructions had been a planned part of the evening. Of course, Diana realized that they had been but just not in the way her mother would think. Lady Henrietta smiled from the Whist table as Lady Amelia and Miss Hannah came to sit down with Diana.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Matthew had enjoyed speaking with Miss Diana at the card party and Henrietta had been more than helpful even after their first encounter making sure that he and Miss Diana were able to, at least be at the same table while playing cards. He had never been happier knowing that Miss Diana felt the same way he did.

  The best part had been seeing her laughing and enjoying herself at his sister's card party. There had only been one moment where she had not looked happy and that was when her parents had walked into the room. Lady Penhaven had looked very upset but as soon as Henrietta had moved people about, Miss Diana had gone back enjoying herself again.

  It was in that moment though, that everything had changed for him. Matthew made a promise to himself and silently to Miss Diana that he would do everything he could to make her happy. He never wanted to see her look that upset again.

  He knew more than ever that he cared deeply for Miss Diana and he must do something soon. If he could have, he would have already asked her to be his wife but he was determined to do what was proper. He knew how he felt about Miss Diana and he had spent a considerable time reflecting on his vows. There would be no way around it, Matthew would have to speak with Miss Diana’s father, Baron Penhaven, to ask for her hand in marriage.

  It would be difficult as it was clear that Lord and Lady Penhaven did not favour a match between him and Miss Diana. As he had told Miss Diana, some truths were hard to speak and this was a truth he could not deny. Because honesty and dedication mattered so much, he could not accept his post in Whitehall without speaking this truth before he left.

  His decision made, Matthew pulled on his coat and left the drawing room. Calling out to Fletcher, “Notify the footman that I am to leave at once.”

  “Yes, sir,” Fletcher replied turning down the hall to the kitchen.

  Matthew went into the library and wrote a quick note, handing it to Fletcher. “Please see that Lady Henrietta receives this upon her return to Repington House.”

  “Yes, sir,” Fletcher said tucking the note into his pocket. “Will you be waiting for the carriage in the drawing room?”

  “No,” Matthew shook his head. “I shall wait for it on the sidewalk.”

  “Very well, sir.” Fletcher nodded and walked over to open the door.

  Matthew walked through the door and then stopped. He turned back and said, “Thank you, Fletcher.”

  Normally stoic, the man smiled slightly before nodding again. “Good day, sir.”

  “Good day, Fletcher.”

  The ride in the carriage did not take long. The London residence of Lord Penhaven was located just outside Mayfair as well. The carriage stopped in front of a large house and Matthew could not help but wonder if he should have walked the distance so he would have had time to prepare himself for the conversation ahead. Of course, Matthew also knew that would have only been more time for him to delay the inevitable.

  Blowing out a long breath, Matthew got out of the carriage and swiftly walked up the steps. He knocked on the door and half a minute later a white-haired man greeted him. "Good afternoon, sir. May I help you?"

  "Yes, I am here to see Lord Penhaven."

  "Is he expecting you, sir?"

  "No, he is not. I had no time to make an appointment."

  "Please do come in." The man stepped back and opened the door wide. "May I get your name?"

  "Yes, of course. Matthew Repington." Matthew’s heart was beating so fast he felt as though he had run all the way from Repington House.

  "Please wait here while I notify Lord Penhaven."

  "Thank you." Matthew waited anxiously in the entry hall. The Penhaven residence was very nice, not as opulent as Repington house but it was certainly kept up and well furnished.
The house seemed rather quiet and Matthew wondered if anyone was actually in the residence. That was until he heard Lady Penhaven shriek from somewhere down the hall. "No, he can wait forever on the front steps."

  Matthew was unable to hear the servant's response as he was clearly speaking in a more respectable manner.

  "You let him in? Perkins, what were you thinking?"

  "The man in question is clearly a gentleman. How am I to discern between someone who is to see Lord Penhaven for business reasons versus someone else? Perhaps I should leave everyone on the front steps until my lady can meet them at the door."

  Even though Matthew was the subject of scorn he could not help but smirk at the older man's brash comment. Lady Penhaven was not as amused by the man's comments snapping, "No, of course not. And watch your tone, Perkins."

  The door Matthew presumed to be to the drawing room opened and Perkins emerged once more. "Mr Repington, if you will follow me, Lord Penhaven will meet with you in the library in just a moment."

  "Thank you."

  Matthew waited in the library not sure if he should sit down to wait or stand. He was still debating his options when the door opened and Lord Penhaven came into the room. The man was nearly as old as Matthew's own father. His hair had begun to creep back from his forehead, but he kept the back longer revealing some of the waves that were quite evident in Miss Diana's hair. Certainly not as curly as hers but still similar.

  "Mr Repington, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"

  Matthew had expected a greeting and some small talk before he got to the meaning of his visit, but he would proceed if necessary. "Good afternoon, Lord Penhaven."

  "Good afternoon, Mr Repington," Lord Penhaven replied, his annoyance clear in his voice. "Why are you here?"

  Matthew took a deep breath and straightened his shoulders. He did not look forward to the conversation, but he would do it for the woman he loved. "It is about Miss Diana."

  "I expected as much," the older man said walking around to stand behind the large desk.

  "I care for her very much and only wish for her the best." Matthew began his speech trying to appeal to the older man’s sense of fatherly protection.

  "As do I."

  "I could go on and on, but I will spare you that and get to the point of my visit. I wish to marry your daughter and I am asking for your blessing." Matthew held his breath as he waited for the man's response.

  Lord Penhaven nodded several times and then began to laugh.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Diana knelt next to the fireplace straining to hear what was happening downstairs. Her bedroom was above the library and she could often hear what was going on there through her fireplace as the two rooms shared a chimney.

  She knew that Matthew was there to see her father. Her mother's shrieks had been heard all through the house. It made her even angrier to know Matthew had heard them as well. She leaned forward and then she heard it, laughter, coming from the library.

  She sat back on her heels wondering what could have made her father laugh. Surely Matthew had not said anything humorous. It took her only a moment to discern that her father's laugh was one of condescension and derision.

  Diana let out a frustrated groan. She had always thought her father respectable and honourable, but she no longer felt that way. If he would treat Matthew, who had shown responsibility and respect by coming to speak to her father, so horribly he was certainly not the man she had once thought he was.

  Angry and disheartened Diana pushed up from the floor to pace in front of the two windows that looked out onto the street in front of the house. She had known her parents did not approve of a match with Matthew, but she had not thought they would be so callous as to disregard her feelings on a matter that would affect the rest of her life.

  How they could think that awful Mr Crandall was a better choice for a husband than someone as responsible and caring as Matthew Repington, she would never know. She refused to think about what would happen if she could not marry Matthew. She could barely stand dancing with Mr Crandall, much less living in the same house with him. The thought of a life with him made her shudder.

  “There has to be another way," she muttered to herself as she paced. She stopped and looked out the window, the vast area of Hyde Park was visible in the distance. If only she and Matthew could leave all of this madness and live in Whitehall where no one could bother them.

  Her aunt's words came back to her. "Your parents found a way."

  Diana had never found out what her parents had done to get around the wishes of their parents, but she knew what she and Matthew could do if they had the courage. She stared out the window again and let herself imagine being married to Mr Crandall. She was sure that a day would not go by where he would fail to remind her how lucky she was that he had married her.

  She did not even have to imagine the joy of being married to Matthew. She would need no such reminders of her good fortune as she would wake up each day feeling blessed and thankful that she was married to him.

  She rushed to her desk and wrote out two quick notes. She folded one in half and addressed the front. The second letter she folded twice and then rolled it as tightly as she could. Praying that her mother would stay in the drawing room, Diana hurried down the stairs. To her relief, Perkins was standing in the entry.

  "Perkins, can you please send this letter out right away?"

  "Yes, of course, Miss Diana," he replied.

  "Thank you very much. And, if you please, do not mention it to Lord or Lady Penhaven." Her eyes pleaded for him to do as she asked.

  He glanced at the library door and shook his head. "Certainly not, Miss Diana. I will keep this between us."

  She nodded and blew out a breath readying herself for what was to come next.

  "Miss Diana, if there is anything else that you need assistance with please do not hesitate to ask."

  "Thank you, Perkins." Diana gave him a grateful smile before turning toward the library.

  Not bothering to knock Diana opened the library door and walked in to see her father sitting behind his desk with a nasty look upon his face while Matthew stood looking rather dejected.

  "Diana, you should not be in here. Go directly to the drawing room and wait for me to come talk to you." Her father’s anger was thick, but she did not care.

  "No, Father, I will not." She did not back down even as her words garnered a look of shock from him. "This has much more to do with me, than with you. Do you not think I should have some say into what is being discussed here?"

  "No, I do not. You are not capable of making a sound decision." Her father stood up. "You will marry Mr Crandall and you will thank me for it."

  "I will do no such thing. I will not marry Mr Crandall, nor thank you for the honour. He is a vile man who treats me with disdain."

  "It is no wonder if you talk to him the way you have talked to me," her father retorted. "No daughter of mine will marry a fifth son."

  Diana gasped at her father's words.

  Matthew stepped in front of Diana. "Lord Penhaven, I realize you are upset but you must not take your anger out on Miss Diana."

  "I will do anything that I bloody please. You will leave my house and never return," he bellowed at Matthew before turning to Diana. "And you will go to the drawing room and wait for me to join you."

  Matthew looked as though he was going to say something else and Diana stepped forward to face him. "It is no use, Matthew. He will not listen."

  He looked down at her and the look of anguish on his face nearly broke her. She shook her head as she pushed the rolled note into his hand her own body shielding the action from her father’s eyes. "I am so very sorry. You should leave before anything untoward can happen to you."

  Matthew nodded and left the library.

  Her father looked smug and proud of himself.

  "You are as vile as Mr Crandall," she told him. "I will never forget the words you have said today, nor will I forgive you."
/>   "Diana, you must—"

  She did not wait to hear what he was to say as she spun on her heel and left the library. She flew up the stairs to prepare for what was to come next.

  Chapter Twenty

  Matthew walked into Repington House having little memory of his journey back there. He was stunned and heartbroken that Lord Penhaven had been filled so completely with disdain that he had dismissed all of Matthew's efforts to speak with him. It was Diana's capitulation though, that had shocked and hurt him far more than any of the insults and threats that Lord Penhaven had hurled at him. Her quiet acquiescence had felt like a knife piercing his heart. It felt as though there was a gaping hole in his chest from which he would never recover.

  Numbly, he walked up the stairs not seeing anything around him in his miserable state. He heard voices downstairs but did not turn to look to see who it might be, wanting only to be alone in his room. He had thought he had been devastated by Lady Abigail's distant rejection of him, but he had been so very mistaken.

  He would spend a few more days in London to get his affairs in order before returning to Castborough. It would not be soon enough before he could travel to Whitehall to begin as the curate at the parish there.

  It was not until Matthew walked into his room and began to pull off his coat that he remembered that Diana had pushed something into his hand in her father's library. He had been so focused on stopping her father from speaking the contemptible words to and in the presence of Miss Diana that he had altogether forgotten that she had done so.

  He stared at the roll in his hand, surely a note. Unsure if he should read it or not, he dropped heavily onto the end of his bed. Matthew did not think he could bear to read Diana's dismissal of him in her own hand. It had been more than troublesome to hear her speak the words to his face.

  He was about to toss the rolled paper across the room when he remembered that she had entered the room defiant and ready to contend with her father. Hoping that what he was about to read would be better than the words she had spoken to him, he unrolled the note.