Believing in Darcy: A Pride and Prejudice Variation

by Renata McMann

  Miss Lucas shrugged. “They’ll be married soon.”

  “They aren’t married yet,” Elizabeth said. “Don’t be too long, and stay together.”

  “We will. It’s only Meryton,” Miss Susan said with a roll of her eyes.

  The two girls skipped off, hand in hand, leaving Darcy quite alone with Elizabeth. The moment they were gone, he felt Elizabeth close in on herself once more, all liveliness quenched. It was very obvious she was trying not to look at him.

  Darcy resumed walking, unsure if he should break the silence. He knew Elizabeth was distressed over the previous day, but wasn’t sure exactly why or how to handle her mood. Whatever had upset her, he thought he should tread carefully. She seemed too wounded for him to even hint at something resembling courtship.

  “I’m not remotely objecting, but I thought we were walking together,” Darcy said. “As soon as we were out of sight of the house, everyone else left. I’m not certain you even wished to come along.”

  She looked down. “I meant to stay home and help with the housework, especially with Charlotte able to do less lately, but she said I must go along, and Lady Lucas insisted I would be needed to entertain you.”

  “Did she?” Darcy wondered if Lady Lucas was being a thorough hostess, or if he lacked the subtlety to keep his feelings for Elizabeth hidden. If Lady Lucas and Mrs. Collins could see into his heart, could Elizabeth? Was that the reason she seemed to be avoiding him? Not because of the fracas with her mother the day before, but because she wished to stave off another embarrassing proposal?

  “She knew Mary and John wanted to be alone together, and that Maria and Susan have discovered a shop in Meryton recently received a shipment of muslin.”

  “A shipment of muslin?” That seemed hardly worth the trouble.

  “This isn’t London. Whoever gets there earliest gets the best choice.”

  Darcy nodded, hoping he hadn’t offended her by not seeing that. “Of course.”

  “In theory, John and Mary are supposed to be chaperoned and the Miss Lucases are supposed to put entertaining you over their desire for muslin, but Lady Lucas is a realist, so she insisted I join you.”

  He was relieved at her words. His secret was still his. Lady Lucas was simply being a good hostess. “Will Miss King and Mr. Lucas actually go to Oakham Mount?”

  “Yes, because Sir William will ask them about it and they won’t lie. If he doesn’t ask, Lady Lucas will, but I suspect she will remind him to. I’ve learned he’s very good at remembering what she reminds him to do.” Elizabeth added to that a slight smile, which Darcy found tantalizing.

  “I’m a little confused about a couple of things,” he said, seeking safe ground and hoping to earn another smile. “I’ve met Lady Lucas in company, and she didn’t seem as capable as she does now that I’ve stayed in Lucas Lodge. Why does she act so differently in her own home than in public? Also, I’m sure I would know this if I paid attention to general gossip, but how did Miss King come to be living in Lucas Lodge?”

  “It’s to your credit not to listen to enough gossip to know why Miss King is with the Lucases.” Elizabeth offered a second hesitant smile. “I’m afraid it’s partially my fault, though that’s not common knowledge, even to the family.”

  “You don’t need to tell me,” he said, not wanting her to feel pressed to divulge anything to him. They turned off the lane onto the trail Mr. Lucas and Miss King had taken.

  Elizabeth shrugged. “It’s nothing untoward. John Lucas was bemoaning his love for Miss King to me. I suggested that, if he loved her, he should go after her. He said Mr. Wickham had swept her away and convinced her and her uncle that all men were fortune hunters.” She shot Darcy an apologetic glance.

  He kept his face expressionless. If he was to marry Elizabeth and maintain his friendship with Bingley, two things he intended to do, he would hear Wickham’s name from time to time. “But you still pressed him to go?”

  She nodded. “I told him he wasn’t giving Miss King the chance to decide for herself, in assuming she would reject him. I told him he would regret it forever if he let someone he loved get away without fighting for them.”

  She stopped walking. Darcy did as well, turning back to her. Elizabeth wore an odd expression.

  “Is all well?” he asked. He was suddenly struck by how alone they were, standing in the dappled sunlight under the trees.

  She nodded. “I was just reflecting on the action I urged John Lucas to take.”

  Whatever Darcy had been hoping for, it wasn’t anything to do with Mr. Lucas. “You regret your words? They seem happy together.”

  Elizabeth shook her head. “I do not regret them. I think, if one really wants something, it should be sought with determination. Small misunderstandings, such as the idea of John Lucas being a fortune hunter, shouldn’t be allowed in the way.”

  “So you stand by your advice?”

  “I do, even if seeing John Lucas again led Miss King to run off after him when her uncle sent him away, ruining her reputation. He took a risk for love. She did likewise. Now, they are both happy. Miss King is much better off than she would have been if she married her first choice.”

  “But it could have gone badly.”

  “Yet it did not.”

  Darcy frowned. He had the odd feeling he didn’t actually know what they were speaking about. He cleared his throat, seeking safer ground in the threads of the conversation. “And Lady Lucas?”

  Elizabeth looked at him for a long moment. He cursed the shade of the trees, making reading her expression all the more difficult. She shrugged, setting off up the path once more.

  “You know how Sir William got his knighthood?” she asked.

  “No, I do not.” Nor was he interested. Something in Elizabeth’s tone had changed. She sounded more sure. Her shoulders were no longer stooped. Darcy would give half his fortune to understand what had happened while they spoke of Mr. Lucas.

  “He received his knighthood for an address he made to the king while he was mayor of Meryton. He doesn’t seem to be someone who could write a speech that would impress the king, but Lady Lucas does.” Elizabeth added to that a knowing smile.

  “Are you suggesting she helped him with the speech?” Darcy asked.

  “No. I’m suggesting she wrote it and helped him practice it. I also wonder about how much she helped her husband in his business dealings. Despite her seven children, I think she contributed to his business success.” She eyed him askance.

  “She may,” Darcy said, thoughtfully, realizing Elizabeth waited to see if he would deny a woman could do any such thing. “I know many successful businesses and farms where the wife’s contribution is critical to that success.”

  Elizabeth’s expression shifted to one of pleasure. “Well, whatever the history, I’m living in a well-ordered household that is run with love.” She was silent for a moment as they continued walking. “It’s nice to see it is possible.”

  “I believe your aunt and uncle in London have such a household,” he said.

  “They do, but I wasn’t sure if it was an anomaly.” She cast him another look. “Speaking of sureness, I’m not sure I’ve thanked you enough for helping my sister. Jane’s happiness means so much to me, and she will make Mr. Bingley happy. I can assure you she will. She truly does love him and is every bit as good natured as she seems.”

  Though he was enamored by the warmth in Elizabeth’s tone, he knew he couldn’t take all, or even most, of the credit. “It was Mr. Hurst who was the prime mover in that.”

  “Mr. Hurst?” She sounded surprised.

  “He noticed Bingley was unhappy,” Darcy said with a shrug.

  “But Jane said you helped.” Her tone was stubborn. “Do you always downplay your good works?”

  “In this case, I am not.” Given the obvious joy her sister’s engagement brought, Darcy only wished that to be the case. He would take all the credit if he could, then take Elizabeth in his arms and collect his reward.

  H
e shook his head, trying to organize thoughts scattered by that image, aware she was watching him carefully. “When called upon to give my opinion, I said that if Bingley was unhappy after several months, he should see your sister again. When I saw her reaction to him, I was convinced she cared for him.”

  “I’m happy you could see it. I know you didn’t before.”

  “Her feelings were unmistakable, even to me.”

  They fell into silence again, the path growing steeper and the trees more scattered. Darcy wondered that they talked about loving couples, but never of themselves. At least she seemed comfortable with him again, though he couldn’t pinpoint the source of her unease and had even less idea how it came to be resolved.

  As the silence drew out, Darcy began to worry they’d moved from a companionable silence to an uncomfortable one. He decided to bring up Mr. Gardiner’s charity work. As Darcy suspected after their talk the day she showed him Pine Cottage, Elizabeth was very familiar with her uncle’s efforts and aware of the difficulty of deciding how best to spend money to help the most people.

  The conversation carried them to Oakham Mount. Mr. Lucas and Miss King were there, claiming they’d just arrived. Miss King had a slightly rumpled look that suggested they hadn’t spent all their time walking or looking at the view. Darcy wondered how Elizabeth would look similarly disheveled. Unfortunately, he didn’t feel any nearer to finding out than when he’d arrived the day before.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Mills will be the ruin of this country.

  Darcy retired to Pemberley, finding his emotions too tightly wound for London. He wasn’t accustomed to the feelings of longing and unease he endured upon absenting himself from Elizabeth. They were singularly uncomfortable sensations. He spent his days pacing his grounds, trying to decide what more he could do about them.

  When a particularly thick missive from Mrs. Collins arrived, Darcy tore it open with more fervor than he would generally employ, hoping for some news of Elizabeth. He hurriedly read Mrs. Collins’ repeated thanks for his efforts on her behalf, then ignored a description of the weather.

  Moving on, he skimmed over a page about Mr. Lucas and Miss King, now Mrs. Lucas. Apparently, the aunt who’d raised her in Meryton had moved away, but returned for the wedding. They were also joined by the uncle and other aunt, Mr. and Mrs. King. The Kings were reconciled to the match. Mrs. Collins suspected this was because her brother was not an impoverished fortune hunter, but someone whose expectations were commensurate with Miss King’s fortune.

  Darcy normally found Mrs. Collins observations astute and written in a somewhat witty, enjoyable fashion. That day, he could hardly focus on them. He skimmed over further details of the event, her droll mention of her father’s repeated telling of how he became a knight, the wonders of St. James described again. All Mrs. Collins’ words did was bring to mind Elizabeth’s suspicion over the origin of the speech, taunting Darcy with hopes of hearing about Elizabeth herself.

  He stopped his skimming, however, when he reached lines he felt Mrs. Collins might have opened with:

  I’ve given birth to a boy, William Bennet Collins. He is named William for his father and mine, and Bennet in honor of Miss Elizabeth Bennet, since he would never have been born without her.

  Darcy hoped that wouldn’t be the only reference to Elizabeth. He would have begun skimming again, but the next section caught his eye.

  Mr. Collins does not walk away from Hertfordshire empty handed. He is to marry Miss Kitty Bennet. Apparently, he would not propose to her, thinking he might not have much to offer her, but he found she wanted to marry him even on his limited income. He will return to Derbyshire shortly, but come back to Hertfordshire before long, for they wish to marry soon.

  Miss Mary Bennet is now engaged to Mr. Phillips’ clerk, Mr. Mitchel. They plan to wait to marry until six more months of mourning have passed. It seems all the Bennet sisters have found places for themselves.

  Alarmed by Mrs. Collins words, Darcy’s eyes darted to the text below. Now, he picked out Elizabeth’s name with trepidation. He dreaded reading news of an impending marriage for her as well.

  I will be moving to Longbourn in a week or two. Miss Elizabeth Bennet will join me there, as will my younger sister, Susan. I feel well enough to go now, but my parents insist it is better to wait. I suspect both of them simply want more time with their first grandchild, but am willing to humor them in return for the kindness they’ve always shown me.

  I appreciate your negotiations, which allowed me to remain on good terms with my late husband’s brother. I believe the money he received was probably less than a trustee would have been paid for doing the work he did, which saved me money. At the same time, it gave him something when he could have left with nothing at all once I bore a son. I am happy he was well compensated for his work. We both are richer for your intervention.

  My father and brother are going to advise me on the running of the farm, but I was in close contact with Mr. Collins while he was here, and I am hoping to learn how to handle things myself. In truth, I already have a good notion of how to proceed.

  She closed with more professions of gratitude. Darcy placed the pages down on his desk, his eyes going to the hastily torn envelope. Nothing in Mrs. Collins’ letter gave him a reason to return to Hertfordshire. He had no excuse to see Elizabeth.

  None save the ache of her absence from his life. Not a logical cause for a journey. Yet, how long could he endure without Elizabeth by his side?

  ***

  Elizabeth should have been looking forward to the dinner party her Aunt and Uncle Phillips were hosting in honor of Kitty’s engagement. It would be a convivial family gathering with Kitty, Mr. Collins, Mary, Mr. Mitchel and, of course, Elizabeth’s mother, and should be similar to the one thrown for Mary not long past. It wasn’t even Mrs. Bennet’s presence at dinner that damped Elizabeth’s mood. It was Mr. Darcy.

  On their walk, she’d resolved to be more like John’s wife Mary and fight for the man she’d come to love. It was all fine, of course, to make that decision, but Elizabeth had no notion how to go about it. Mary Lucas was correct in her protest that her journey to find John Lucas wasn’t so great a risk as it might seem. He loved her and she knew it.

  Could Elizabeth really run off to Derbyshire as Mary Lucas had come to Hertfordshire? Elizabeth had no notion what reception she would receive from Mr. Darcy, a man who knew she’d misjudged him and whom she’d very emphatically turned down. If he wouldn’t have her, she’d be ruined.

  The night of the dinner went much as Elizabeth anticipated. Her mother dominated the conversation around the table. She spent hours congratulating herself and her engaged daughters, chastising Elizabeth for not having married the elder Mr. Collins, and bemoaning that Pine Cottage wasn’t big enough for her to hold their meal, something she hadn’t done when Mary became engaged.

  “I don’t see why Mary and Jane have to wait for six months to pass,” Mrs. Bennet said as dessert was brought, having finally exhausted her earlier topics. “I wouldn’t be offended at earlier marriages and if I’m not offended, no one else should be.”

  “Well, I’m getting married sooner,” Kitty said, smiling at Mr. Collins.

  Elizabeth was pleased the meal wasn’t at Pine Cottage. Kitty shouldn’t be made to clear up her own celebratory dinner. She was also pleased by the loving look Mr. Collins turned on her younger sister.

  “Yes, and leaving me all alone,” Mrs. Bennet complained plaintively.

  “Do you want me to delay the marriage?” Kitty asked, sounding unsure.

  “No, of course not. Who knows what might happen if you delay.” Mrs. Bennet glared at Mr. Collins, as if he’d suggested abandoning Kitty. “With your looks, constitution and temperament, you have to leap at this opportunity. You’re a fool to let him return to Derbyshire without a ceremony.”

  “Mama,” Elizabeth protested in chorus with Mary.

  Mrs. Bennet turned her eyes in their direction. “That goes doubly
for you, Mary. Any moment, Mr. Mitchel is going to come to his senses. Whatever were you thinking, agreeing to so long an engagement?”

  “I was thinking that I’m honoring Papa,” Mary snapped, her face bright red.

  Elizabeth hid a smile. It was good to see Mary stand up to their mother. She would be a married woman soon with a home of her own to run.

  “Oh, your father,” Mrs. Bennet lamented. “If only he’d saved more for you girls I’d have something to give you. Then he’d be worth honoring. Instead, you’re permitting his memory to ruin your one and only chance at happiness, Mary.”

  Mrs. Phillips cleared her throat. “Perhaps some fruit tart, Mrs. Bennet?”

  Elizabeth’s mother ignored that, and any other attempts to change the subject. The whole table was made to endure another rant about how little money she had and how her daughters had all abandoned her because she couldn’t give them anything. Elizabeth realized there was no help for it, as they were all too polite to intervene. Was this why her father had taken to tormenting her mother? Was cruelty the only means of stopping her?

  “Do you know, I hear Mr. Darcy owns a mill,” Kitty said over their mother’s ranting, her voice loud.

  Elizabeth’s heart leapt at the sound of his name, even as her mind struggled to accept Kitty’s words. Mr. Wickham had mentioned a mill, but she hadn’t quite believed him and had put the idea from her mind. For once, had his words been the truth?

  “Mr. Darcy?” Mr. Phillips said, sounding relieved at the change in topic as he turned from Mrs. Bennet to Kitty. “That doesn’t seem like him.”

  Elizabeth had to agree. Mills were renowned for poor work conditions and exploitation. It couldn’t be true. “Where did you hear such a thing, Kitty?”

  “From me, I’m afraid,” Mr. Collins said. “I don’t wish to spread rumors, but I have it on good authority that it’s true.”