Japanese Plays

by A. L. Sadler

  LADY: What’s this? I thought it was your master. What on earth are you doing here? What d’you mean by it? Where’s your master? Tell me at once! I’ll have your head off immediately if you don’t!

  KWAJA: Oh, please don’t! I’ll tell you everything if you will spare me!

  LADY: Well, hurry up! If you don’t—

  KWAJA: The master has gone to see Hana-ko Sama and—

  LADY: What’s this? Hana-ko Sama do you call her?

  KWAJA: Hana-ko-me, I mean. Er ... the wench Hana-ko; and he told me to get into this cloak, and I did not want to do it, but he drew his sword and threatened to cut off my head if I did not do as I was told, so I did it willy-nilly. Please spare my life, for I didn’t do it on purpose.

  (Sheds tears.)

  LADY: You’re sure you didn’t do it on purpose then, but only because he threatened your life?

  KWAJA: Yes, indeed, that is the truth.

  LADY: Then look here. I have something I want you to do too. Listen to me.

  KWAJA: Please tell me. I will do anything for your ladyship, even to the risk of my life.

  LADY: That’s good. Then put this cloak over me and arrange it just as you were yourself.

  KWAJA: That is an awkward thing to ask me; when the master comes home, he is sure to kill me. Please let me off.

  LADY: Oh! You’re more afraid of your master than of me, are you? I’ll show you!

  KWAJA: Oh, I’ll put it on for you. If you’ll spare me, I’ll put it on!

  LADY: Then make haste about it! Now does it look just like your master’s figure?

  KWAJA: Exactly like it.

  LADY: That’s a good boy. Now you go along and see your aunt in the capital, and I’ll send and fetch you back when the master has got over it. You had better hurry off at once.

  KWAJA: Yes, my lady. It is very considerate of you to let me go now. A pretty fix I’ve got into! I think I’ll be off at once.

  DAIMYO (wearing a ko-sode or wadded garment, his hair loose, and his robe tucked up, singing):

  How sweet it is to loose the dainty brocade inner girdle!

  Who could forget her willowy form, her loosely flowing tresses!

  When I think of the grace of her lovely face, as from far she watched me depart;

  So dazzling and shy like the moon in the sky, regret still fills my heart.

  Dear me! Here am I singing to myself in my happiness. Taro Kwaja will be tired of waiting. I’ll cheer him up a bit when I get home. Ah, ha! It’s a fine thing to be one having authority. There he is, nicely covered up, just as I told him. Ho, Taro Kwaja! I’ve come back. Why doesn’t he say anything? It must be rather uncomfortable in that thing. But you will be pleased, too, looking forward to hearing something pleasant. Well, this is how it was. When I reached her house, though she did not know I was coming, strange to say, as I stood listening outside to hear how things were, the sound of her voice came to me from within singing this song: “The lamp burns dim, and all is lonely here, then comes my love to me.” Greatly rejoicing I tapped at her door, whereupon she sang again: “When one is held in very high esteem, who is it that knocks at the door in the evening?” At this I replied in an answering verse:

  Who is it who would come, dripping wet, on a rainy evening?

  Would you reproach me forsooth, if you too long for a meeting?

  Then Hana-ko came forth and took my hand and led me into the house. Ah! Then it did not matter about the rain. She took off my upper garments and brought me some fresh ones, and then we had a long chat about all sorts of things, and danced and sang until, all too soon, we heard the cry of the crow that heralds the dawn. It seemed but an hour we had been together before the voice of the crow proclaimed the dawn. And so we had to say farewell. Then Hana-ko sang this stanza:

  By a copse beneath the mountains lies my house, and so the crow cries always to the moon.

  Let it be midnight ever while you’re here.

  “Though you may wish it,” I replied, “if the day breaks someone may see me, so I must hasten away.” When did Hana-ko ever say anything contrary to my wish? “I expect you want to see your wife again,” she said. So I sang these lines about my wife:

  If you would compare my wife to other ladies,

  She is like an old monkey huddled up, wet through with the rain, which made her laugh exceedingly. And this mantle she gave me as a memento, so I must get rid of it somewhere, for it would never do for the old lady to find it. (Utai)–“But I cannot bear to leave it, for whene're I take it up, I see a lovely form appear, and by day and night love overtakes me so that I must weep bitter tears.” So I give it to you. Keep it somewhere so that the old lady does not see it. Take off that mantle now. I’ll get into it in your place.

  LADY: What’s that you don’t want the “old lady” to see? A fine kind of meditation indeed! The sort of meditation you practice!

  DAIMYO: Oh! Oh! What’s this?

  LADY: Yes, you may well ask what it is!

  DAIMYO: Oh, please excuse me. Please overlook it this time.

  LADY: No you don’t! I won’t let you off!

  Footnote

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  THE SIX SHAVELINGS

  FIRST MAN: I am a man of these parts, and I have it in my mind to go on a pilgrimage, and but as I prefer to go in company I think I will call on some of my friends and invite them to go with me. Well, here we are. Is anyone at home?

  SECOND MAN: Who is it?

  FIRST MAN: It’s only me.

  SECOND MAN: And what do you want?

  FIRST MAN: Today being a fine one it seems to be a suitable occasion to set out on the pilgrimage that I intend to make, as I have already suggested to you.

  SECOND MAN: Yes, certainly. And as I think there is someone else who will come too, I will go and invite him, so I will follow you in a short time.

  FIRST MAN: Very well.

  SECOND MAN: That is done.

  FIRST MAN: Then let us go.

  SECOND MAN: Certainly.

  FIRST MAN: Now when people travel together it is natural that occasionally things should happen that irritate them, so let us agree to keep our tempers at these times.

  SECOND MAN: As you say, on such a long journey it won’t do to play the fool, so whatever happens we won’t get angry with each other.

  FIRST MAN: Ah, I’m tired. I feel extremely tired. I fancy there is a small temple by the wayside just here, so I will go in and lie down. How sleepy I feel.

  SECOND MAN: He looks very tired, doesn’t he?

  THIRD MAN: Yes, evidently he isn’t used to traveling yet.

  SECOND MAN: Look here. He’s sound asleep. Well, he said, not long ago, that he would not get angry whatever happened. It would be amusing to tease him and see.

  THIRD MAN: Yes, as he was so sure about it, it would. But what shall we do?

  SECOND MAN: He’s such a heavy sleeper that you could burn him without his knowing it. Let’s make a priest of him.

  THIRD MAN: Oh, that’s too much.

  SECOND MAN: Not at all. He said he would not complain whatever happened, and so it’s all right. And if he does get angry, well, it will be time then to consider what to do. Have you a razor?

  THIRD MAN: No, I haven’t.

  SECOND MAN: You’re a careless sort of fellow. Anyhow, I have, for I thought I should want it to shave myself. Now you hold him.

  THIRD MAN: Right. (The other produces the razor and shaves his head.) There. That’s one side done. Now how are we to manage the other? Ah, I have an idea. They say if you pour some water into anyone’s ear when he’s asleep, he’ll turn over. (Pours a drop of water into his ear so that he turns over. Then shaves the other side of his head, puts a hood on his head, takes off his outer coat, and puts a priest’s cassock on him instead.) Well, I think I’ll have a nap too.

  SECOND MAN: I, too (The two of them lie down. The first wakes up and stares in astonishment at his priestly garments. He goes and wakes the other two.)

  SECOND MAN: Hullo! What has made you
take orders so suddenly?

  FIRST MAN: What has made me indeed? Why if this isn’t your doing, whose is it I should like to know?

  SECOND MAN: What on earth d’you mean? You think that, do you? Why, we know nothing about it.

  (The other abuses them vigorously.)

  SECOND MAN: As you will. But, anyhow, suppose we did. You know you promised not to lose your temper whatever happened, so you ought not to go on like that.

  FIRST MAN: That may be, but it depends on the ease. How would you like to be made a priest like this?

  (After further exchange of compliments the priest goes off. The other two go on.)

  SECOND MAN: Well, let’s get on. What an awful fellow!

  (They sit down by the Daijin-bashira.)

  FIRST MAN: I shan’t be easy till I’ve paid them out. But how to do it? Ah, I have an idea. I’ll go back again home and see. Hullo! Is anyone at home?

  (The two wives of the others appear.)

  WIVES OF FIRST and SECOND MEN: Why, that’s his voice. Yes, he’s back again. What is it? Why have you come back?

  FIRST MAN: Yes, but I find it difficult to face you again.

  WIVES: Why? What is it? Has anything happened to our husbands? Why haven’t they come back too?

  FIRST MAN: Well, it’s like this. I came with the intention of telling you all about it, but I feel so overcome that I can’t speak for tears.

  WIVES: But we must know more. Do please tell us at once.

  FIRST: Well, I suppose I must speak out. The fact is that we were going along the road together, when we came to a big river, a place I think you are hardly likely to know, and those two went to cross it straight away. I warned them that it was probably too deep, and suggested they test it, but they wouldn’t listen but plunged in, holding each other’s hands, and when they got to the middle they got out of their depth and were swept away by the stream and drowned.

  WIVES: Oh dear, how awful! Is it really true?

  (Both weep.)

  FIRST MAN: Yes, I am afraid it is. It was such a shock to me, you see, that I at once became a priest and was on my way to Mount Koya to pray for them, when I remembered that you knew nothing about it and thought you ought to be informed, and so I turned back again to do so.

  FIRST WIFE: Ah, then, it is really so. I was thinking it was but a bad dream, but now there is nothing for it but to throw myself into a river and die too.

  SECOND WIFE: Yes, I shall commit suicide too.

  FIRST MAN: But I think that won’t do any good at all. It would be much better to shave your heads and spend your time saying prayers for the welfare of your late husbands. Don’t you think so?

  WIVES: Perhaps you may be right. I think I will.

  FIRST MAN: Yes do. That’s excellent.

  WIVES: And since there is nobody else we can very well ask, will you shave our heads for us.

  FIRST MAN: Well, then, if you really mean it I will.

  (He shaves them one after the other and they put on cotton hoods.)

  FIRST MAN: Now as I said before I am going on pilgrimage to Mount Koya, so I can take this hair of yours there with me and make an offering of it.

  WIVES: That’s very kind of you. Please do.

  FIRST MAN: Well, so the pair of them have become nuns. That’s something accomplished. I feel better after that. I don’t suppose those fellows will have got far. I’ll follow them up.

  (Goes on.)

  SECOND MAN: Ah, that fellow wasn’t likely to have gone home like that.

  FIRST MAN: Hullo! Who are you?

  SECOND and THIRD MEN: What d’you mean? Can’t you see it’s us?

  FIRST MAN: It sounds like you certainly, but ... It’s very odd.

  SECOND MAN: What’s odd?

  FIRST MAN: Why, when I got home I was told that someone had brought word that both of you had been drowned in a river, and I found your wives in mourning for you.

  SECOND MAN: What nonsense you talk! I suppose you are telling us that to get even with us.

  FIRST MAN: Not at all. I’m quite serious. And your wives were so overcome by grief that they committed suicide in despair.

  SECOND MAN: Yah! You can’t take us in with that tale.

  FIRST MAN: Well, if you won’t believe me here is proof of it.

  SECOND MAN: What proof?

  FIRST MAN: Look here. Look at this hair. Don’t you recognize it? That’s your wife’s, and this is yours.

  (The two take it in their hands and examine it.)

  SECOND MAN: Ha! Yes, this is short and brown.

  THIRD MAN: Yes, and this hair has a kink in it all right. Can it be true?

  FIRST MAN: Why should I deceive you? I just came to tell you because I thought you didn’t know about it.

  SECOND MAN: Ah, yes, now I come to think of it, she always said she wouldn’t survive if anything happened to me. It’s just what I might have expected. I’m afraid there’s no doubt about it. How cruel!

  (The pair of them begin to weep.)

  FIRST MAN: Well, if you feel it so much, don’t you think the best thing would be to pray for their welfare in the after-life?

  SECOND MAN: Yes, that is the best thing we can do. We’ll become monks and go to Mount Koya.

  THIRD MAN: Yes, so we will. Will you shave our heads?

  FIRST MAN: Oh, yes, if you wish. (Shaves them and they put on the hoods and dress of mendicant monks.) You look well like that. Monks’ robes become you. Well, let’s get on. But we had better go home on the way.

  SECOND MAN: Yes, that would be as well.

  FIRST MAN: Well, here we are. And here are your wives. (They appear.) And now d’you think it was so clever to play that trick on me?

  (The four fly into a rage.)

  SECOND MAN: Yah! What shall we do to him? We’ll get his wife and shave her head too.

  FIRST MAN: Oh, I can’t allow that.

  SECOND MAN: Who wants you to. We’ll do as we like.

  (They get his wife and shave her head and change her dress. All six now appear as shavelings.)

  FIRST MAN: Carrying a joke too far has always been considered bad form. But this seems to me no ordinary matter. It is very likely a warning to us to seek enlightenment in the future.

  SECOND MAN: Yes. That may well be. Life is short and we ought not to fool it away. We ought to be more serious. We must improve on this opportunity to obtain enlightenment.

  FIRST MAN: Then let me lead the chorus. Namo-oda!

  THREE MEN: Namo-oda!

  THREE NUNS: Namo-oda!

  CHORUS: Namo-oda! Namo-oda! Namo-oda! Toppai! Hyaro! Hi!

  ASAHINA

  EMMA: I’m Emma-O, the Lord of Hell. I’m Emma-O, the Lord of Hell! And here I am in the guise of a begging monk!

  CHORUS: Here indeed is Emma-O, the Great Lord of Hell, for of late men have grown cunning, and what with the eight, yea, the nine, sects of Buddhism, more and more of them have been getting into the Pure Land Paradise of Amida, so Hell has grown quite poverty-stricken and Emma-O has to go out to the Six Roads and see if he can’t find some sinners there.

  PILGRIM-SONG:

  My well-loved Hell thus left behind,

  My native Hades left behind,

  On foot I jog upon my way,

  And now I’ve reached the Six Highways.

  CHORUS:

  Yes, now he’s reached the Six Highways,

  And here he’ll wait till sinners come

  That he may haul them down to Hell.

  ASAHINA: Here am I, Asahina, as mighty as ever, hastening along to the Dark Road.

  CHORUS: Ah, it is Asahina Saburo, suddenly swept away by the wind of impermanence, and now on his way to the Dark Road.

  EMMA: Ha! There’s a smell of man. That must be some sinner coming. Ah, yes, here’s a sinner all right. Hi! You sinner! Hurry up!

  ASAHINA: Hullo! I thought I saw something moving here. Who are you?

  EMMA: I’m Emma-O, the Lord of Hell!

  ASAHINA: Oh, indeed. Well, you make a pretty poor show. The
y tell us in the Shaba-world that he wears a crown of jade and a girdle of jewels and shines brightly all over, but you’re not doing anything of the sort.

  EMMA: Oh, in the good old days I used to glitter in gold and jewels all right, but now things have changed and man has got so cunning and gets into the Paradise of Amida in such numbers that Hell is frightfully hard up and I’ve had to put my jade crown and the rest into pawn and I haven’t a single thing left. But come here, my man, and let me torment you and throw you into Hell.

  ASAHINA: Yes, I’d like to see you.

  EMMA: Come on then. (Bangs at him with his iron club, but Asahina takes no notice.) Hullo, what sort of a fellow are you who doesn’t turn a hair when Emma-O starts to torment him?

  ASAHINA: Don’t you know me? I’m Asahina Saburo.

  EMMA: Oh, are you? Sorry you have had the trouble of coming so far. I suppose I ought to let you off, but really it’s a pity not to torment a stout fellow like you a bit, so I’ll have another go at you and then fling you down into Hell.

  ASAHINA: Go on then.

  (He snatches the club and knocks him down with it.)

  EMMA: Well, well, I suppose I’d better give it up. Ah, I’ve a bright idea. You know all about Wada’s wars, of course? Well, I’d like to hear you recite some of them.

  ASAHINA: Oh, I know, for I was in the middle of them all. But I must sit down if I am to recite. Bring me a camp-stool.

  EMMA: Yes, yes, but go on. (Asahina pulls away the camp-stool Emma was using.) Now! What a way to treat the Lord of Hell! A rough fellow!

  ASAHINA: See here! These are the seven weapons with which I did my great deeds in those fights.

  EMMA: Ah, they smell of blood!

  ASAHINA: Now, listen to my tale!

  EMMA: Go on, I’m all ears.

  ASAHINA: Well then, the origin of the fighting was that Egarano-Heita was seized by the Shogun at the Usui Toge and taken to Kamakura. So that ninety-three warriors of his house swore to wipe away the shame of his imprisonment, and my father, Wada Yoshimori, again putting his helmet on his white hair, led all our clan against the palace of the Shogun at Kamakura and flung his forces against the south gate with a mighty shout. And just as I was flinging the foe in all directions and doing great exploits my father sent me a message to know why I had not broken down the gate, and to do so at once. So I dismounted from my horse and seized a great beam with which I proceeded to batter at its iron-bound doors and bolts. Though in as fearful a position as the Mount of Swords in Hell I never blenched for a moment, but putting forth all my strength pushed and pulled and heaved with might and main until at last the doors gave way and fell. I then fell on the thirty warriors who were within and slew them. I cut them to pieces so that they were like nothing but a fish salad.