by Lisa Eugene
“I think Emmy may have just found a mirror.”
***
Although my heart was breaking, I was determined not to let Senator Kensington’s vicious insults get to me. I wished I could share in Chase’s single-minded optimism, but couldn’t shake the feeling of impending doom. A storm was coming, and I didn’t want to be stranded in the middle of it.
I tried to hold tight to the serenity Chase brought me, to walk away with only our sweetest memories, but when Emmy and I returned home and found Steven standing at my apartment door, those emotions fizzled away along with the tendrils of receding daylight. Only darkness loomed in the narrow hall of my apartment building.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked tartly, my heart already doing double time.
Steven slouched against the dirty plaster wall, hands tucked into the pockets of ripped jeans. I couldn’t help but notice his wrinkled clothes, the gaunt hollowness of his cheeks, and the dark intention brewing in his eyes. He was even thinner than when I’d last seen him. Drugs had been a selfish companion, thieving only the best of him. His eyes raked over my face.
“Great tan.” He motioned toward my duffle bag and Emmy’s small, pink suitcase. “Vacation?”
“You shouldn’t be here,” I warned, opening my apartment door. “I’ll call the police.”
At that moment, I wished I’d taken Chase up on his offer to walk us up to the apartment. Instead, I’d rushed out of his Bentley like a bat out of hell, trying to escape the prying eyes of my neighbors. Our trip back had been done in silent agony, and I’d simply needed to escape.
“You’ve been avoiding me.”
No shit.
I unlocked the door, holding it open for Emmy to enter the safety of the apartment. She had to pass Steven, and I couldn’t help but notice that he stepped back, a look of scorn on his face. My anger ballooned at his disdain toward his own child.
God forbid he’d catch her autism!
“Danielle, I’m in trouble,” Steven said, his voice reedy with fear.
I shook my head, almost feeling sorry for him. “You need to get help. You have to get back into rehab.”
Turning to enter my apartment, I froze when he took a step toward me.
“Don’t you dare come any closer! I don’t want you anywhere near me or my daughter.”
“This is serious,” he pleaded. “I owe someone a lot of money. If I don’t pay him, I’m afraid of what he’ll do.”
I frowned. He was most likely talking about his dealer. Apparently he’d forgotten he also owed me a lot of money.
“I don’t have any money to lend you.”
“What about that rich guy you’re seeing—the one who’s been taking you on vacation and buying you shit? If you ask him for money—maybe tell him you have a sick relative or something—I’m sure he—”
“Steven! Stop it. There is no man. Stop listening to Stanley! And stay out of my goddamn business!”
His lip curled angrily. I sensed a storm brewing, felt the dark threat of it. Before I could slip into my apartment, he grabbed my arm roughly. “You’re a liar! You think I’m a fool?”
“Let go of me!” I sneered through clenched teeth.
Trying to break his grip, I dug my nails into the fleshy forearm holding me. Steven snarled, and before I knew what was happening, his angry fist connected with my jaw. The pain was so stunning that my vision blurred. I tasted blood and felt it trickle to my chin. A savage blow to my stomach had me crouched over and I thought I’d vomit up my lunch.
He cuffed my temple and I whimpered. A cry of pain rolled out of my throat and I forced myself to breathe, to think. I thought of my daughter, vulnerable in the apartment and sucked deep fortifying breaths into my lungs. When Steven came at me again, I kicked out with everything I had and slammed my foot into his groin. He doubled over, clutching his balls as he shrieked in pain.
I took the opportunity to escape into my apartment, quickly slammed the door, and engaged my locks. My pulse skipped when a loud crash shook the door. Listening to the hollow rattle, I feared he’d break through. My jaw hurt like a bitch, and my stomach felt as though I’d swallowed razors. I winced as Steven viciously kicked the door over and over, the sound quivering my gut. Pulling out my cell to call the police, I exhaled a deep breath. It was time to do something about this man. Steven was a ticking time bomb.
***
Tuesday I dropped Emmy off at Rutherford Academy where she was attending the summer program, and headed to the county courthouse to file a petition for an order of protection against my ex-husband. By the time the cops had shown up last night, Steven had given up and left, but the dents he’d left on my door and on my body were enough for me to file a complaint of assault.
The courthouse was packed, people crowded in like cattle and huddled against the wall. I’d already been on line for a half hour and knew I still had at least four more stops before I was done. If I had a lawyer, the process would be less onerous, but I couldn’t afford one.
Sandwiched in between a large woman who had a death grip on her purse and a jittery man constantly clearing phlegm from his throat, I watched a couple across from me fight and snap at each other. A security guard had come over a few times and demanded they cut it out, but each time he walked away, their bickering resumed.
Sighing, I breathed shallowly to avoid the pungent stench of sweaty bodies, and prayed this wouldn’t take all day. I’d told Philippe I’d be in to do the evening shift.
A group of men entered the courthouse and heads swiveled to the back of the room. Following their gazes, I almost fell off my bench when I saw Chase striding towards me. Even from far away, I could see his blue eyes were dark with fury.
Bowing my head, I tried to melt into the crowd, but Chase came to a stop directly in front of me. The immaculate crease of his tailored slacks filled my vision and I slowly followed it up, over the lines of a tall hard body, to a face with barely contained rage. A bailiff stood beside him along with another man in a suit and two other court officers. Everyone stared, even the couple across from me stopped fighting to gape with stunned curiosity.
I heard Chase’s name float around me in quiet whispers, and my head spun. My stomach flip-flopped wildly. How the hell did he know I was here? What did he think he was doing? He held out a palm, and I could do nothing but accept it as I avoided eye contact with the spectators in the courtroom. They all thought I was in serious trouble, that I’d no doubt committed some heinous crime. I could tell by the stark condemnation on their faces.
My legs moved stiffly as Chase walked me from the courtroom, then down a long hall to a private room. There was a single table and a few wooden chairs. He hadn’t said a word, but I knew from his rigid posture he was trying hard to hold it in. As soon as the door closed, his large hand gripped my jaw, angling my head left and right to closely examine my bruised face and busted lip.
“Who the fuck did this to you?” he snarled, his voice a low, menacing growl.
A muscle ticked furiously in his jaw, and stupidly I felt tears prick the back of my eyes. My stomach trembled, and ashamed, I pulled away from his grasp.
“How did you know I was here?” I asked, needing a moment to simply breathe.
“Was Emmy hurt?”
“Who told you I was here?”
Chase squeezed his eyes tightly shut as if calling on some Herculean effort for calm. His nostrils flared. “Tell. Me. Who. Did. This.”
Crossing my arms over my breasts, I notched my chin. “Emmy is fine, but this is none of your business. I’m not your responsibility, Chase. I thought I made that clear.”
I must’ve said the wrong thing because in a sudden blur of rage he picked up a wooden chair and flung it across the room. I flinched as the chair hit the wall, a leg splintering to pieces. The door sprang open and the bailiff rushed in. His stunned gaze went from the broken chair, to Chase who still had his gaze trained unblinking on me, to my wide, astonished eyes. His brows arched in question and
I gave him a jerky nod that everything was okay. With a second look at Chase, he backed out of the room and closed the door.
Squaring my shoulders, I shook my head to clear it. “Ch—Chase, you can’t just . . .”
My words trailed off as he walked toward me, forcing me to step back until my back hit a wall and he was pressed tight against me. Heat radiated off him in angry, dark clouds, his masculine scent wrapping around me like an embrace. I fought the urge to curl up against him and seek refuge in his arms. He cupped my chin, this time with gentle authority. A deep furrow cinched his forehead.
“What happened, Dani? Tell me, love.”
Sighing, I looked away from his stabbing gaze. He’d find out eventually. I’d have to name Steven in my petition, and there was the police report from last night.
“Steven, my ex.”
He blinked, seeming confused. “You said you didn’t have contact with him.”
“I never said that. I said he’s not part of Emmy’s life. He’s not.”
“Jesus Christ! Dani, what the fuck—”
“And he’s not part of my life either! Not the way you think. He just shows up every now and then asking for money. He has a coke problem. He got angry last night when I told him I didn’t have any money to give him.”
Chase swore violently and dug his fingers through his dark waves. “Does he know about us?”
I nodded silently. “Stanley, my super, is friendly with him. He probably told him how you paid to get into my apartment, about the piano, the Bentley. Steven is a lowlife—they both are.”
I’d made some bad choices in my life, and hated having to reveal so much to Chase. Never one to apologize for who I was or my circumstances, it troubled me that I cared so much about Chase’s opinion of me. Maybe now he’d see just how disparate our lives were.
He’d never known what it was like to live paycheck to paycheck, to worry where his next meal was coming from. He’d never had to sleep with one eye open because he was afraid, worried for his and his child’s safety.
He’d never been awoken at night by the sound of gunshots just outside his window and ambulance sirens singing sad lullabies. Even now, I felt like life was about trying to survive, trying to do right by the one person who mattered most in my life—Emmy.
Chase lowered his head, and his lips tenderly brushed against mine. Even though I was shaking inside, I couldn’t deny the riot of flutters he stirred in my belly. He smelled so good I automatically drew in an extra breath.
“No more of this bullshit about you not being my responsibility, or about ending us,” he scoffed. “I will handle this.”
“No! I’ve got this under control,” I said. “That’s why I’m here—to get an order of protection against him. I’m not the damsel in distress you feel the need to constantly rescue! I can take care of myself, Chase. I’ve been doing it for a long time.”
I wasn’t sure he was listening to anything I had to say. His lips continued to feather softly over the discoloration at my temple, my jaw, my busted lip. A long, warm, shaky breath rippled over my tender skin as he stepped back, and I felt the irresistible pull of it.
Looking around, he ordered me to sit at the table and told me he’d be right back. About fifteen minutes later he entered with a man at his side—the man in the suit I’d seen him enter the courthouse with earlier. He introduced him as Mr. Wasko, a lawyer who would be “taking care of things.” I opened my mouth to protest, but the hot glare Chase shot at me had my shoulders sagging in defeat.
The lawyer explained that normally I’d have to get an Ex Parte order until the formal hearing, which usually took about one week, but Chase was able to get a judge to sign off formally on an order of protection to be enforced immediately. I still needed to have a court hearing with Steven present, but having this judgment provided a measure of reassurance not just for myself, but also for Emmy’s safety. I signed the necessary documents and the lawyer left the room.
Chase hung up from the call he’d taken and walked to my side.
“Ready?”
“Thank you,” I said with a small smile, swinging my head in exasperation. I rose from my chair and eyed him with a pitiful resolve. He was as wonderful as he was frustrating. How was I supposed to purge him from my head and my heart if he kept being so amazing. I couldn’t keep a level head around him. “Chase, I—”
“I know. . .” He pulled me in close and buried his face in my neck. “I know you want time.”
I let my fingers caress the soft hair at his nape while planting kisses along his jaw. “You make it very difficult to break up with you.”
He looked up with a big grin on his face. “Good. I can make things even more difficult tonight if you give me the chance.”
I laughed, trying to ignore the heat his words stirred, and looked at my watch. “I have to work tonight.”
Groaning, he pulled back with a serious expression. “If your ex tries to contact you again, you have to let me know.”
I rolled my eyes and pulled away, picking my purse up from the table where I’d left it.
“Dani, I mean it. Promise me.”
“Fine,” I said testily, heading towards the door. I was grateful for what Chase had done for me, but I didn’t want to come to depend on him. When it came to men, disappointment was the only thing I could depend on.
***
At the end of the week, a mail runner knocked on my door and handed me an envelope. I tipped the young man and stepped back into my apartment, thinking the letter might have something to do with scheduling a hearing with the court. My gaze flipped to Emmy who sat lining up rubber bands on the coffee table, noticing she’d started with her new, neon colored collection.
I tore open the envelope and couldn’t help the small smile I felt edging up my lips when I saw the familiar business card. Turning it over, I read the slanted script.
Tuesday 6:00 p.m.
Please come, CR
What surprised me was the address written beneath. A residential address. Chase’s apartment.
So much for needing time . . .
This man could make me lose myself, lose my mind, and discard all manner of reasoning.
I really shouldn’t go. It would be wise to stay away at least until the election was over. Senator Kensington’s threats still rang like toll bells in my head. Something about that man terrified me. And I didn’t scare easily.
“Oh Chase . . .” I groaned in hopeless frustration, his card clutched tight in my fingers. I’d never wanted anyone so desperately.
Emmy must’ve heard me say his name. She looked up from her play, our gazes connecting as the brightest smile lit up her angelic face. And that smile burst golden rays of hope and love inside me.
***
“Open wider for me, Dani. Show me your pretty pussy . . .” Chase groaned deeply.
I let my knees fall open, arching my back high off the desk. Chase’s gorgeous, two-bedroom apartment was located on the top floor of a Manhattan high-rise with a wall of windows overlooking the East River. He’d moved in two years prior after abandoning the brownstone he’d shared with his wife. One bedroom had been converted to a study with a huge desk in the middle that rivaled the one in his office, and ironically, that’s where I’d chosen to settle.
We’d been celebrating. His contact, Roger, at the Thai Flex-Steel plant had come through. Chase had finally gotten the information he needed on Robert—proof he’d bribed the Thai official. That, and the original documents attesting to the pollution would be enough for the board to demand his resignation. Worried about Los Lobos, Chase transferred Roger back to the Ohio factory as promised.
After the delicious dinner he’d made, I’d hooked a finger into the waistband of his slacks, and with a wicked grin, pulled him into the study. Grabbing our two glasses of champagne, he’d followed, lids lowered over silvery blue eyes like a hungry wolf.
And hungry he was. Chase wrapped his fingers around the stem of the champagne flute, held it high above m
y naked body, and tilted it just so. A thin stream of sparkling liquid poured like a waterfall over my belly, then ran down my pelvis to drizzle through my glistening sex. I’d propped up on my elbows to watch, and the chilled, bubbly liquid sizzled like millions of tiny explosions over my sensitive flesh.
The cool shock of it made me gasp, but it was when Chase lowered his dark head and slowly massaged his hot tongue over my flesh that my thighs trembled uncontrollably and I tossed my head back with a long, guttural moan.
Sensation popped at every synapse, overloading my nerves until my legs were weak and sliding off the edge of the desk. Chase sucked hard on my clit, drawing the tight flesh into his mouth and between his teeth. His fingers circled my ankles, keeping my legs firmly in place.
“Stay . . .” he mumbled, his tongue twirling through my creases, lapping up the champagne. “I want to get drunk off this sweet pussy.”
He reached for the glass and poured more, drenching my flesh so more cool liquid seeped into me, trickling between my ass cheeks to wet the desk. Chase moaned lustily, relentless in his pursuit of every last drop.
I writhed beneath him, the pleasure so sweetly suffocating it forced air from my lungs in short, desperate gasps.
“Fucking delicious . . .” he hummed, and the vibration of his lips shot a lightning bolt of bliss through my body.
“Oh, God, Chaaaasssseee!” I cried out, grinding hard against his face as I spasmed again and again. My body shuddered with uncontrollable ecstasy, the kind that leaves you stunned and just a tiny bit scared.
After a moment, he lifted, taking my mouth with a lush kiss. In a few deft moves, he’d pushed down his slacks, not bothering to step out of them, or to remove his shirt. He tugged hard on his swollen cock, the motion bouncing the heavy balls beneath. His hips rocked back and forth, powerful thighs bunching as he pumped his shaft through the tight circle of his fingers.
