Three Reasons to Wed

by Helen Lacey

  Miss Violet knew? Grady’s insides churned. The whole thing was getting more complicated with every passing second.

  Marissa deserved to be told the truth, but Grady felt it wasn’t his place to say anything. Rex had always seemed to be a decent and honorable man, and he clearly didn’t want to hurt Marissa. So, he’d wait for Rex to do the right thing and ensure he was there to handle the fallout. Marissa would need him, no doubt about it. And he’d be there for her even if she didn’t want him to be.

  * * *

  Marissa spent Saturday packing boxes and cleaning out the two spare rooms in the house. Sunday morning she spent with her aunt, going over her plans to move into the retirement villa within the next few weeks. It was all organized and she was happy for Violet. She still had to make a decision about the ranch and there were plenty of reasons why it was a good idea. She needed a home and the farm had been a home for her when she was a child. And whatever she decided, Marissa was looking forward to the next phase in her life.

  New beginnings.

  Exactly what she needed.

  But she couldn’t quell the unease in her heart—although she didn’t say anything to her aunt. And on the way home from the hospital, she stopped to visit Liz.

  The cemetery was just on the outskirts of town, only a short detour. There were a number of cars in the parking area, and once she’d parked Marissa grabbed her tote and walked through the stone gates. Liz was laid to rest near the rest of the O’Sullivans. It was one concession that Grady had made to her grieving parents, and she knew it had been a difficult decision for him.

  Marissa stood by the ornate white marble headstone. Elizabeth Ann O’Sullivan Parker. Daughter, wife, mother. Much loved and forever in our hearts. There were several fresh flowers resting against the headstone and she wondered if Liz’s parents had been by that morning.

  Marissa closed her eyes and said a prayer for her dearest friend. Her own mother was buried on the other side of the hill in much less grand circumstances. As were the grandparents she’d never met. But it was always Liz she came to see. Liz, who had been there like no one else when her mother had died. Who understood how much she’d longed for a proper family.

  What would her friend think if she knew her thoughts? Her dreams?

  Her desires...

  Marissa had so many thoughts running through her mind and heart. About herself. About her new life. About Grady. Wanting him was one thing, but the realization that it was more than that...well, it was hard to keep the idea from invading her thoughts 24/7. She hadn’t expected to have feelings for him. But she did.

  I’m falling in love with him...

  Admitting it was both cathartic and terrifying.

  “Marissa?”

  A deep voice jerked her from her thoughts. Grady. She pivoted on her heels. He was standing about six feet away. He was dressed in dark jeans, a blue shirt and a jacket. He looked familiar and attractive, and she experienced the usual fluttering in her belly.

  “Are you okay?” he asked.

  She nodded. “Fine. I just came to pay my respects. But I don’t want to intrude, so—”

  “You’re not intruding,” he said, cutting her off. “I came by earlier. I’ve been down at my dad’s grave with my mom and Brant.”

  Marissa stepped back and smiled fractionally. “Are the girls with you?”

  “With my mother and Brant,” he replied. “They spent a few hours this morning with Liz’s folks, but I bring them to see their mom every month. It’s for Breanna mostly... She remembers Liz and seems to get comfort from coming here. While she’s still asking to come and see her mother, I’ll bring her. They like to bring daisies.”

  Marissa’s heart contracted and she looked at the three small posies again. “They were Liz’s favorite.”

  “Yes. Even though she was never one for flowers and gifts, she did love daisies.”

  Marissa fondly remembered how her down-to-earth friend had often looked dismayed at the frivolous gifts Marissa always brought back from New York when she visited. But Marissa had playfully ignored Liz’s protests that she was spoiling them all with her generosity. “Liz would love that you bring them here. You’re a good dad, Grady. Better than you realize, I think.”

  His blue eyes darkened. “Thank you. But you know, being their dad is the greatest gift I’ve ever received. Being a parent is very humbling.”

  “I’m sure it is.”

  “One day you’ll discover for yourself,” he said and moved closer. “When you have a baby of your own.”

  The idea had her womb rolling over. “Maybe...one day.”

  She stepped onto the path, said a final goodbye to Liz and walked away. Grady walked in step, and the silence between them was suddenly deafening. She didn’t want to talk to Grady about having babies. Because suddenly the only babies she wanted to have were his!

  “So,” she said, shifting the subject, “why are you all dressed up?”

  “I’ve been a contract brand inspector for a few years,” he explained as they walked. “I had a meeting in town earlier.”

  “You mean cattle brands?” she queried.

  “Exactly. Mitch Culhane and I do most of the inspecting in this county.”

  Marissa knew the Culhanes owned a ranch even bigger than Grady’s on the other side of town and she’d gone to school with a few of the Culhane brothers. “Working on a Sunday?” she teased. “That’s commitment.”

  He shrugged in that loose-limbed way of his. “Just another day. And I was coming into town anyway, to drop my kids at my in-laws.”

  By the time they reached the gates, the girls had already spotted her and came running. Breanna and Milly hugged her close just as Colleen was putting Tina into the backseat of her car.

  “It’s lovely to see you, Marissa. We’re having lunch together at my place,” Colleen said, smiling. “Would you like to join us?”

  Marissa felt faintly embarrassed by the idea of being included so impromptu. She looked at Grady, but he was ten feet away having a conversation with his brother. “Oh, I wouldn’t want to intrude on—”

  “Nonsense,” Colleen said gently. “You could never intrude. And the girls would love to spend some time with you.”

  Breanna and Milly chorused their grandmother’s words, and before she had a chance to decline they all had climbed into their vehicles and were driving off. Marissa lingered in the parking lot for a minute or so before she started the Volvo and headed into town. When she arrived at Colleen’s, the girls were waiting by the front steps and Grady was sitting on the love seat on the porch, with Tina in his arms.

  His gaze followed her up the path and she was excruciatingly aware of his scrutiny. She stopped at the bottom of the steps and got another hug from the girls before their father told them to go inside.

  When they were out of sight, she spoke. “Sorry to crash your party.”

  His gaze was unfaltering and he rocked in the love seat while the toddler dozed against his chest. “You know very well everyone wants you here.”

  She shrugged a little. “Well, Breanna, Milly and your mom.”

  “Everyone,” he said again.

  Heat smacked her cheeks and she held her breath. He had a way of making everything sound sexy. A way of making her forget every reason why she shouldn’t be attracted to him.

  Why she shouldn’t fall in love with him.

  She pulled herself together. “I’ll go and see if your mom needs any help.”

  He didn’t move. “I’m sure she’d like that.”

  Marissa took off as if her feet were on fire. She didn’t want to be constantly uncomfortable around Grady, but their relationship was heading that way. She didn’t make it to the kitchen, though—the girls waylaid her in the hallway and dragged her into one of the bedrooms that had been converted in
to a playroom. It had everything a little girl could want—a dollhouse, a sketching easel, a wardrobe filled with dress-up clothes, and a small table and chairs for tea parties. Marissa couldn’t help smiling. The huge dollhouse looked as though it had been handcrafted and she was pretty sure Grady had made it for his daughters.

  She sat on the narrow bed and allowed Breanna to place a tiara on her head and for half an hour laughed and clapped as the girls dressed up and danced and twirled and had a marvelous time. Marissa painted Milly’s nails and watched as Breanna rummaged through the wardrobe for what she said was the perfect princess outfit.

  It was, in fact, a wedding dress. Vintage style, with a lace bodice and long chiffon train that fell from the hips. Colleen’s old dress, she suspected, which Breanna quickly confirmed.

  “Nan lets us wear it anytime,” Breanna said and frowned a little. “It’s too big, though.” The little girl’s eyes widened. “But not for you. Put it on. Put it on,” she chanted quickly.

  “Yes,” Milly insisted and started jumping up and down as she usually did. Marissa had little chance of refusing as both girls started twirling around the room, laughing and pleading. She slipped the gown over her own dress and was surprised that it actually fit quite well. Breanna zipped her up and Milly placed a pair of satin shoes by her feet. She ditched her sandals and put them on—they were a little tight, but the girls were having such a delightful time she didn’t have the heart to complain.

  Breanna handed her a long lace veil, and once she’d placed it on her head Marissa checked herself in the mirror by the bed. Even though the gown was lumpy in parts because of her other dress underneath and the shoes were tight and the veil had a couple of tears in it, she still couldn’t help smiling at her reflection. There was something utterly romantic about a wedding gown—even if it was simply make-believe.

  “Wow,” Breanna said, her expression filled with pure joy. “You really do look like a princess.”

  “Actually,” a deep voice said from the doorway, “you look like a bride.”

  Marissa turned and almost toppled off the heels. Grady stood in the doorway, arms crossed, one shoulder resting against the architrave. He was regarding her with such burning intensity she couldn’t have looked away even if she’d wanted to.

  “Ah...where’s Tina?” she asked, conscious of the heat in her cheeks and the trembling in her knees.

  “Right here,” he said as the toddler peeked out from behind his legs and raced into the room. “But since she’s been a little cranky this morning she’s going to go down for a real nap once she’s had lunch.” His mouth turned up at the edges. “Are you having fun?”

  She nodded. “Absolutely.”

  Breanna rushed toward her father and tugged at his elbow. “Daddy, doesn’t Marissa look like a beautiful princess?”

  “She does indeed,” he said, his gaze unmoving. “Very beautiful.”

  Marissa managed a smile. But the tension between them was palpable and she knew he felt it as much as she did. “Apparently it’s your mother’s dress.”

  “It is,” he said, still not moving, still watching. “The girls love this room. Grown-up girls, too, by the look of things.”

  She laughed softly. “The idea of being a princess for ten minutes was way too tempting.”

  “What about being a bride?” he asked, his voice so low she was sure he meant the words for her alone. “Is that tempting, too?”

  Yes...

  But she didn’t say it. Because she wouldn’t have been able to reply and hide the longing in her voice. He could never know. Not ever.

  “I should get out of this costume and go help your mom,” she said instead.

  Before she had a chance to ask Breanna to unzip the gown, Grady had instructed his eldest daughter to take her younger sisters to the kitchen. Once the children had left the room, he pushed himself off the doorjamb and moved behind her.

  “Need some help?” he asked quietly.

  Marissa was about to respond when she felt his knuckles against her back as he slowly unzipped the dress. Of course it should have been perfunctory and harmless. But it didn’t feel like either of those things. It felt...seductive. It felt...good. And in that moment she could easily imagine Grady stripping off the rest of her clothes and then falling into bed with him.

  The gown dropped to her feet and she quickly stepped out of it and smoothed down her own dress that had been underneath. Then she scooped up the gown and placed it on the narrow bed. “Thanks,” she said and sat on the bed so she could take off the shoes.

  Grady was beside the bed in a second, crouched at her knees wordlessly, her left foot in his hands. “You know,” he said, so softly she bent closer to hear the words, “you look incredibly pretty in a tiara.”

  Marissa realized she still had the tiara and veil on her head and her fingers immediately came to her temple. “Breanna insisted,” she said.

  “My daughter wants what she wants,” he said and slowly removed her shoe. “She’s a lot like her father in that way.”

  Marissa’s breath caught in her throat. “And what is it that you want?”

  His gaze was unfaltering. “Oh, Marissa,” he said as he removed the other shoe. “I think you know.”

  There was so much sexual promise in his voice that she shuddered. He held her foot and ran a thumb slowly along the arch, and his touch made her moan. “Please...” The word was barely audible. “Stop.”

  Grady released her immediately and stood. “Okay. But when you’re ready, Marissa...just let me know.”

  She looked up and pulled off the tiara and veil. “Ready? For what?”

  “For this,” he replied and waved a hand. “For us.”

  Us?

  It sounded so real. So...normal. But it was a dream. A fantasy. “We...can’t.”

  He shrugged loosely. “Why not?”

  “Because,” she said and got to her feet. “It wouldn’t be right.”

  “For who?” he asked. “You? Me? The girls? My mom?” He turned and ran a clearly frustrated hand through his hair. “Damn it, Marissa, half my family is already in love with you.”

  But not you.

  Because Grady’s heart belonged to someone else. And always would.

  “What do you think, Grady?” she shot back. “That just because your kids and mother like me that’s enough reason for us to jump into bed together. Well,” she said, hands on hips, “it’s not.”

  “I’m not talking about jumping into bed together.”

  She stilled. “Then what?”

  He shrugged loosely. “Honestly...I don’t really know... All I know is that seeing how happy my daughters are when they are around you has made me realize I’d be foolish to ignore what’s been happening between us these past couple of weeks.”

  Her insides were jumping, her hands were shaking and her heart was aching. And she had no idea what he meant. If it wasn’t about sex, if it wasn’t about the attraction that seemed to have suddenly developed a will of its own, then what was it?

  She took a deep breath. “Do you want to date me because your children would approve? Is that it?”

  “I think so...yes.”

  I think so.

  Such commitment!

  Marissa glared at him. He truly did have an ego as big as South Dakota. “Tempting offer, but no, thanks.”

  He actually looked surprised. “No?”

  She stood her ground. “No.”

  “One date...it’s just a place to start,” he said, brows raised. “Don’t you think?”

  “I’m not about to start anything with you. And I’m going to forget we’ve had this conversation,” Marissa said as she shook her head, got some gumption in her back and headed for the door. But he called her name and she stopped before she crossed the threshold. “What?”
/>
  “I meant what I said,” he replied. “Only when you’re ready for this, and not before.”

  Marissa gave him a death stare. “You have some ego, you know that? And why this sudden change? Two weeks ago you said you weren’t interested in anyone.”

  “I don’t think I said that exactly. You asked if I still felt married to Liz,” he reminded her. “And I said people simply didn’t turn off feelings.”

  “I know what you said, Grady,” she shot back. “But why now? And why me?”

  He stared at her, deeply, intently, as if there was nothing else and no one else. “Because I think you’re beautiful. Because my daughters adore you. Because I want you in my bed.”

  And she knew, right then, that he thought that would be enough. But if she said that, if she admitted that she wanted more...that she wanted everything...then he would guess the truth. And Grady knowing she was falling in love with him would be too humiliating to bear.

  “It wouldn’t be right,” she said again. “Liz would—”

  “Liz is gone,” he said, cutting her off. “And neither of us can hide behind her now.”

  “I’m not hiding.”

  “Sure you are,” he said quietly. “And for far too long I’ve done the same. But...”

  “But what?” she asked hotly. “Now you’ve had some big awakening and want someone to warm your bed?”

  “Not someone,” he replied quietly. “You.”

  She laughed humorlessly. “That’s ludicrous.”

  “You can deny it, but the truth is that there’s something between us...something I’m not prepared to ignore any longer.”

  She didn’t want to hear it. It was too rational. Too much. “Like I said, I’m going to forget we’ve had this conversation.” She flipped the words out and then left the room. Legs shaking. Heart breaking.

  * * *

  Grady had no luck finding a new housekeeper. He’d interviewed three people in the past two weeks and none were suitable. Two wanted a room-and-board situation, which he wasn’t offering, and the other made it clear she wasn’t keen on younger children. On Wednesday afternoon he called the employment agency in Rapid City and asked them to find a few more candidates. And until he found someone he’d continue to work around the girls’ school schedule the best he could, with a little help from his mother, his brother and the McCords. And Marissa.