“Hey, kid,” Kyle greeted him.
Ted’s head snapped up. Kyle and Brenda were a couple of people back in line, followed by Cory and her mom. His eyes connected with Cory’s, and the jolt set off a riot in his midsection. “Hey.” He couldn’t quite muster a smile. “Glad to see you guys made it.”
“Looks like you could use a little refreshment.” The group he’d been serving moved along, and Kyle handed him a cold can of beer.
“Thanks. Just what I needed.” He took a couple of swallows and held the cold metal against his overheated brow for a moment.
“You going to join us later for the fireworks?” Brenda held out her plate for him to fill.
Kyle jerked his thumb over his shoulder toward the sloping lawn. “We have a couple blankets laid out next to each other.”
He set the beer aside. “Uh…” Good thing he was already overheated from serving up the hot food, or the color rising to his face would be obvious. He glanced at Cory. This time she turned away.
“We’d love to have you, wouldn’t we, Cory?” Claire chimed. “I brought the cribbage board.”
“Sure.” Cory tucked her bottom lip between her teeth.
“OK.” His heart knocked painfully around his rib cage. “I’ll be here quite awhile yet. Save me a spot.” Give her space, but be there for her. How the hell was that supposed to work again?
CHAPTER TEN
THE FOURTH OF JULY FIREWORKS were about to begin, and Cory was grateful for the darkness. It hid so much. Her eyes drifted over to Ted again. He lay sprawled on his back with his arms tucked under his head and his ankles crossed, claiming the space forming a seam between her blanket and the one Brenda shared with Kyle. Neutral territory—a statement.
True to his word, he’d kept his distance all week, and missing him had become the new backdrop to her life. Sharing her darkest secrets with him had been so easy. Did he feel the same? He’d told her things as well, allowed his vulnerabilities to show. All that was gone now, and as much as she wished it hadn’t, awkwardness had sprung up between them like a prickly thistle plant.
And the real kicker? Spending less time with him hadn’t really made any difference. Her nights were growing worse, and she slept less and less. A band of anxiety tightened her airway. Had she made a rash decision when she’d pushed Ted away? Face it. Rational was beyond her. How could any decision she made in her present state be anything but messed up?
Right now her struggle involved self-restraint. She longed to stretch out beside him, snuggle against his side, and wrap her arms around his waist, taking in his unique male scent. Maybe then she could sleep.
“You smell like roasted pork,” Kyle teased.
“One of the perks of the job.” Ted tilted his head to grin at Kyle. “Did everybody get enough to eat?”
“My, yes.” Her mom sighed. “Everything was so yummy. We’ve never been to a Fourth of July celebration quite like this, have we, Cory?”
“No.” She’d made lemon bars for the dessert table, and had been pleased to see how quickly they’d disappeared. Everyone brought a side dish or a dessert to share, and each family put something into the donation box to offset the costs of next year’s festivities. When she was a kid, she and her mom always followed the crowd in Evansville to the levee by the Ohio River to watch the fireworks. It was fun, but lacked the sense of community and sharing the Langfords and Lovejoys’ celebration provided.
The first pop and flare against the inky sky heralded the start of the fireworks display, and the crowd oohed and ahhed. The sound made her jumpy for a minute, until she checked her mom and Ted, grounding herself in their calm. A little one started wailing. A few more toddlers took up the cry as if they’d caught the condition from the first.
Ted chuckled. “Happens every year. I think I recognize Micah’s screech in the choir. They’ll settle down once they’re distracted by the color and light.”
Cory braced herself with her arms outstretched behind her and lifted her eyes, trying to distract herself with the color and light as well. Memories filled her head of the night she and Ted had stared at the stars together, and their last kiss. She preferred the natural beauty of the night sky to the fireworks, or maybe it was just her own sentimental thinking running interference.
What was going through Ted’s mind right now? Her attention slid back to him. Did he miss her like she missed him? Had she made the biggest mistake of her life by putting a stop to their growing closeness?
No. She forced her gaze back to the sky. Ending it had been the right thing to do. She’d been strung so tight, one more ounce of pressure and her trip line would’ve sprung. The problem was, the tension hadn’t eased a whole lot. Overwhelming sadness stole over her, followed by a flash of anger. No use in dwelling on the unfairness. Doing so changed nothing.
The display went on for a good thirty minutes, ending in a spectacular grand finale of neon-bright bursts of light and thunderous pops and booms. Sulfur-scented smoke drifted across the river, settling over the spectators in wispy, white tendrils. People began to gather their things. Parents lifted sleepy children into their arms and headed to their cars for the trip home.
“I’ll go fetch your dessert container,” her mom offered as she stood up and stretched.
“Thanks.” Cory got up and started to fold their blanket.
“How are you, Cory?”
“I’m fine.” Liar! Ted’s voice, his nearness sent a shiver down her spine. “How are you?”
“Tired. It’s been a busy week.”
“This was the best Fourth of July event I’ve ever attended.” She clutched the folded blanket against her chest. “I had a great time, and so did my mom. I’m glad we came here instead of following our usual routine in Evansville.”
“I’m glad too.” He shifted his weight and bowed his head. “Listen, I want you to know I’m not going anywhere. Don’t forget. I’m like that old truck. If you need me, all you have to do is call or text. I’ll be there for you in a heartbeat.”
“I don’t think—”
“You deserve the best, and I—”
Her mom called from a short distance up the slope. “Is the carriage house locked?”
Cory peered into Ted’s earnest face. “Mom is spending the night with me. I’ve got to go unlock the door for her. Thank you, Ted. I won’t forget.” Choking on regret, she left him standing there with a million things left unsaid. Her mother waited by the carriage house door. Cory pulled her keys from her back pocket and reached around Claire to unlock it.
“That Teddy Lovejoy surely is a fine young man,” her mother said as she preceded Cory into her apartment.
“Yes…he is.” She flipped the light switch.
“Why do you sound so sad?”
“Because I am sad, Mom.” She swung her arm out in a gesture to encompass her apartment. “I have so much to be thankful for: you, good friends, my job, this great place. Yet I can’t get past the sadness, and I can’t shake this awful anxiety.”
The next thing she knew, she was being rocked in her mother’s warm embrace like when she was a little kid. Tears filled her eyes and slipped down her cheeks. “I’m sad, and I’m angry. I feel like I’m stuck in the spin cycle of some crazy old washing machine, and I just want it to stop.”
“I know, honey. I know.” Her mother continued to rock her where they stood. “Let it out. A good cry leaves you empty, and then there’s room for something better to fill the space.”
“I…I told Ted I didn’t want to spend so much time with him anymore. Being with him stirred up…It was making things worse.” She sniffed.
“You have feelings for him?”
She nodded. “He’s the greatest guy I’ve ever met.”
Her mom let go of her and walked to the kitchen for paper towels. “Sit down, Cory.” She returned and handed her a few sheets. “Things always seem the worst right before they get better.”
“You always say that.” She sank into the recliner. “And it’s just
because one notch above miserable can feel like relief, even though nothing has really changed.”
Her mom chuckled. “We come from a long line of survivors. You’ll get through this, baby.”
She wiped her eyes and blew her nose. “I told Ted not to wait for me to get better. I have no idea how long it’ll take, or if I’ll ever be in a place where I’m ready to get close to anyone that way again.”
“You think that’s gonna stop him from waiting for you anyway?” Her mom’s mouth quirked up. “I’ve seen the way that man looks at you, Corinna Lynn. Your daddy used to look at me the same way.”
“Yeah, but you weren’t screwed up.” Even so, the words were a balm to her splintered heart. She squelched the tiny ember of hope coming to life in her chest. “I’m a mess.”
“Things have a way of working out the way they’re meant to.”
“Or…we just have a way of adapting to how they work out one way or the other.” She sighed and rubbed her eyes. A large yawn escaped. “I’m exhausted.” She pushed herself up from the cushy chair. “I’ll go get the extra pillow and blankets for the couch. You can have the bed.”
“You take it. This is your place.”
“I have to get up for work tomorrow, and you don’t. It makes more sense for me to sleep out here. That way I won’t disturb you.” Not that she slept much these days anyway.
“All right.” Her mom canted her head and studied her. “Focus on how much better you already are. You weren’t eating, bathing, or gettin’ out of bed much when you first got home. Now you go to work every day and you’re taking care of yourself again. Maybe you can’t see how much better you’re doin’, but I can.”
“I guess.” In some respects, sure. Having a routine and structure in her life helped. Guilt pinched at her. “I’m sorry I caused you so much worry.”
“Don’t you think anything of it. I’m just overjoyed you’re home now and doin’ so much better.” Her mother gave her another quick hug. “Go on now. Get ready for bed.”
Her mother’s tone brought the flicker of a smile to her face. Claire Marcel had used the same commanding mom voice Cory’s entire life. “Yes, ma’am.”
Knowing her mother was nearby reassured her. Still, it was midnight before she finally settled herself on the couch. Tomorrow there would only be a skeleton crew at work. Most of the guys had taken Friday off, including Paige and Ryan, who were in Oklahoma celebrating the holiday with his folks. Good thing she’d already made arrangements with Wesley to keep his dog with her.
The thought of being alone in that small room sent a shudder through her, but then she thought about how Ted had put the deadbolt on the door. She glanced at the stun gun she’d set within easy reach on the coffee table, and love for him flooded her senses. He’d done so much for her, and what had she done for him?
Snuggling into the soft leather cushions of the couch, she made a point of counting her blessings instead of sheep. Hopefully doing so would keep the nightmares at bay.
Cory took another swallow of coffee. She needed the caffeine to help her keep her thoughts together for this meeting. She’d make a point of stopping at the drugstore today on her way home. Perhaps the pharmacist could recommend an over-the-counter sleep aid. She stood up and passed out her progress report. “Here’s where we are so far on the insurance project.”
Attending the Monday morning meetings had become a regular thing for her ever since she and Paige had discussed it. “The Perfect Diner is on board, along with Offermeyer’s Meats, the local hardware store, the real estate office, and just about every independently owned business in town.” She sat back down, relieved and pleased with the progress she’d made. Despite her lack of sleep, she’d managed to pull things together in time for this meeting.
“We’ve formed a committee with representatives from each business to study the bids once we start taking them. The committee will narrow it down to three possible providers with a variety of tiers to choose from, and then we’ll present it to the stakeholders for a vote.” She looked around the room. “As you can see, we have substantially increased our numbers, which will help keep the costs down. We’ve also talked about starting a hardship fund that each business and member can contribute to voluntarily. It’ll help defray costs in case some kind of disaster hits a particular family. Have you given any thought to how much L&L is willing to contribute to employee premiums?”
“I guess we have to take a look at what the costs are going to be first. Once the committee has actual figures, we’ll discuss it.” Noah leaned forward. “I can tell you this, though. We’re all grateful for the way you’ve taken on the insurance project. Thank you, Cory.”
Pride straightened her spine and infused her with energy. “I’m glad to do it. Everyone I talked to was eager to get going on this. I think we need something legal drafted to form an actual group for this. Don’t we?” She glanced at Ted. “I don’t really know how these things work. Mostly what I’ve done is contact employers and gathered numbers, and that was easy.”
“My brother Roger is a lawyer,” Ted said. “I’ll talk to him today and find out what we need to do, especially if we intend to move forward with the hardship fund. I’m sure he’d be willing to take care of the legal stuff for us.”
A surge of gratitude and warmth for him filled her. Their gazes locked, and she smiled. “Thank you. That would be great.”
Ted stood up abruptly. “We done here?”
Noah blinked at his sudden movement. “I believe so. Why?”
“Got stuff to do.” Ted left just as abruptly as he’d stood.
The echo of his footsteps in the hall worked on her nerves. “Me too. We have a shipment almost ready to go, and I have to get transport set up.” Why had Ted left so suddenly? He’d seemed fine, courteous and politely distant as usual one minute, and desperate to get away the next. Cory gathered her things and headed for her office. She’d just settled into her chair when Paige entered.
“I feel soooo guilty.” Paige plopped down at her desk.
“Why?” Cory frowned in confusion. “About what?”
“Two reasons.” She grimaced. “One, I let the ball drop on the insurance stuff. It was originally my project, and it should’ve been done a few years ago. Two, because my dad pays for our insurance coverage through his company. Noah’s family is on the Langford Plumbing Supplies insurance rolls as well.”
“Don’t feel guilty about your good fortune. With a baby coming, I’m just glad to hear you’re all covered. You’ve had more than your share of work to do here. You didn’t have the time to follow up on this project. Everybody knows that. Besides, I’m glad it fell into my lap. It’s given me a chance to get to know more people in Perfect, and that’s a good thing.”
“Does that mean you’re ready to join the monthly poker games?” Paige waggled her eyebrows.
The poker night consisted of couples, most of them married. “Hmm, I’ll think about it. What about starting a bowling league?”
“Bowling? That sounds like fun. I’ve never bowled. Maybe Ryan and I will join.”
“I’ll look into it.” It would be fun. They could compete against other local leagues. “I’m surprised you guys don’t have a—” A voice raised in anger reverberated down the hall. Ted’s voice. A minute later a door slammed.
“Oh, boy.” Paige looked from the door to her. “What do you suppose that’s about?”
“I don’t know.” Or maybe she did. She hadn’t meant to hurt Ted, but her rejection had to sting. It had certainly affected her.
Ryan strode into their office, a perplexed expression on his face. “Man, I thought things were settling down on the Teddy score.” He ran his palm over the back of his neck. “Seems like he’s more agitated than ever.” His eyes connected with hers. “You spend a lot of time with him, Cory. What’s eating him now? He seemed so much better for a while there.”
Her face filled with heat, and anxiety gnawed away at her ragged edges. She didn’t want to admit she might
be partly to blame. Regardless, he’d shared enough with her that she had a pretty good handle on what bothered him, and this was her chance to speak up. “Did you call him kid, by any chance?”
“Well, sure. We all do. He’s the youngest guy here.”
“No. Noah, Wesley, and I don’t. Neither does Paige.”
He scowled. “What are you getting at?”
She shot a quick glance at Paige, who gave her a slight nod. Sucking in a breath for courage, she met Ryan’s gaze. “If it weren’t for Ted, you and I wouldn’t have this job. L&L was his idea, and he’s worked around the clock to make it a success, getting his undergrad and master’s all the while. He signs our paychecks.”
“Your point being?” Ryan picked up a rubber band from the corner of Paige’s desk, leaned against the wall and turned his attention to stretching and twisting the strip of rubber.
“Don’t you think he deserves our respect?”
“I do respect him. He knows that.” He pushed off from the wall, his posture stiff. “It’s an affectionate nickname.”
Her eyes widened. “I’ve heard him ask you repeatedly not to call him kid. We’ve all heard him ask. Knowing it bothers him, hurts him, even, but you continue to do so. And because you call him that, the production and finishing crews do too. That’s your idea of affection? That’s how you show him respect?”
Cory studied the desk in front of her. “It doesn’t take spending a lot of time with him to see what’s going on. All it takes is being an outsider looking in. From where I sit, what you’re doing has nothing to do with affection or respect and everything to do with one-upmanship. You’ve done a great job of undermining his position and his authority with the guys, and you’ve managed to keep him feeling like an outsider. Year after year, that kind of put-down would be difficult for anyone to bear.”
A Change of Heart (Perfect Indiana#3) Page 18
