Weightless

by Kandi Steiner

  “Do flowers fix what happened last night?”

  She shrugged. “They’re a start.”

  My stomach knotted. I knew there was more that she wasn’t telling me, but I couldn’t force it out of her. Mom and I had never talked about her and Dale’s relationship. I knew that they started dating shortly after my father took off and Dale had whisked Mom away in a whirlwind romance. All my life, I’d watched Dale love her like I wanted a man to love me one day. Now, I felt like I had been standing in a thick blanket of fog that was suddenly being fought off by the sun.

  “So,” Mom said, clearing her throat and tidying a stack of paper on the counter. “I heard Mason asked you out at Willow’s party.”

  I scoffed. “First of all, how in the world are you hearing stories from a high school party? And secondly, no, he didn’t.” I shifted. “He may have said something along the lines of wanting me back, but he did not ask me on a date.”

  “Natalie,” my mom said, crossing her arms over her chest. She was still dressed in her pajamas. That’s how I knew she’d had a rough night. Jillian Poxton did not lounge around in pajama pants and a t-shirt. She must have stolen them from my dresser. “That is essentially the same thing. And why are you telling me this story like you didn’t take him up on his offer?”

  I shrugged, pouring myself a glass of water. “Because I didn’t.”

  Mom’s mouth popped open.

  “I don’t want to be with Mason anymore,” I explained, sipping from the glass. “I didn’t see it when it happened, but I think him breaking up with me was one of the best things that could have happened.”

  “I don’t understand.” Mom shook her head, her blonde locks falling from the loose ponytail she’d tied. “Mason is from a good family, Natalie. He could make you happy. And you’d be comfortable.”

  “I don’t want to be just comfortable, Mom. I want a love that makes me everything but comfortable. If it doesn’t drive me mad, if it doesn’t break my heart at the thought of losing it, if it doesn’t push me to new places and force me to grow — what kind of love is it, really?”

  Mom appraised me for a moment, chewing the inside of her cheek. “You talk about it like you might have already found it.”

  I dropped my gaze to my water, tracing the lid of the glass with my pointer finger.

  She sighed. “Honey, as a woman, sometimes you have to make sacrifices. Sometimes you have to make choices about what you need in life and how to get it.”

  “Did you have to make sacrifices with Dale?” I lifted my eyes to hers again.

  She swallowed. “Yes. And with your father, too. But every choice I made was to better my life. And yours.” She cleared her throat, fingering the sweatpants she was wearing as if she just realized she was in them. “They weren’t always the easiest choices, but women don’t exactly have it easy when it comes to the battle of life versus love.”

  Shrugging, I finished the last of my water and dropped the glass in the sink. “I don’t think the two have to be on opposite sides of the war line.”

  Mom eyed me again, opening her mouth to say more before quickly closing it and standing up straighter. “I suppose it’s something you’ll have to learn on your own, sweetie.” She snapped her fingers. “Oh! That reminds me. I need to start a grocery list for Christina. You have any requests?”

  I chuckled, watching Mom snap right back into business mode. “Life, love, and battle reminded you of groceries?”

  She stuck her tongue out and I giggled again, but when my eyes focused on the notepad she was writing on, the laugh caught in my throat.

  “Oh my God,” I whispered.

  “You okay, sweetie?” Mom had stopped writing, but my eyes were still glued to the page.

  Snapping out of my haze, I grabbed the keys to the Rover and jogged toward the door, grabbing my gym bag off the couch as I passed.

  “Sweetie?”

  “Fine, Mom!” I yelled over my shoulder as I blew through the front door. “Just late for training. See you later!”

  Slamming the door behind me a little harder than I meant, I sprinted for the car and threw it in drive, tearing out of the driveway. My foot was hard on the gas pedal all the way to the gym and I parked across two parking spots before leaving my bag behind and running straight back to the training room.

  Rhodes was spotting one of his clients as she benched just the bar. I was tempted to roll my eyes at the way she was drooling as she gazed up at him, but I had more important emotions rolling through me.

  “I know where the note came from,” I blurted out. Rhodes’ brows turned in and he eyed me curiously. I wasn’t sure if it was because I was an hour early to training or what I had just said or both.

  “What?”

  “Just,” I stopped his question with my hand, motioning to the woman on the bench. “Wrap this up and come back to the office.”

  “I’m in the middle of a session, Natalie,” he warned. Even though he had his new job at the restaurant, he still needed his training job and I knew that. But this couldn’t wait.

  I gave him a pointed look to emphasize the urgency and he blew out a breath through his nose, motioning with a nod of his head for me to go back to the office. I heard him tell his client to take a water break and hit cardio. She whined, literally whined, and I ground my teeth. Before I acted on my annoyance, I closed the glass office door behind me and paced around the desk.

  Rhodes opened the door moments later and I started rambling before he had the chance to close it again. “It’s from the marina. The note. It’s Dale’s stationery. I knew I had seen this mark before.” I unfolded the note and smoothed it out on the desk, pointing to the small orange markings where the tear line was. The note was torn at the bottom edge, like someone had tried to tear off the logo, but even with just the top of it there — I recognized it.

  “I don’t understand.” Rhodes shook his head, brows furrowed.

  “This is the top of Dale’s stationery logo. But see how it’s an ugly orange color?” Rhodes nodded. “It’s supposed to be red. Sometimes, the notepads like the one this paper came from get printed incorrectly. It drives my mom absolutely insane because she’s a perfectionist. But, she hates being wasteful, too. She won’t let Dale use them for anything customer-facing, so she takes all the misprints down to the Poxton Beach Dry Boat Storage Marina. They’re always writing notes and putting them on the boats so the employees know where to put them and what customer and such. Since it’s just them that see it, Mom figures it’s a way to get use out of the stationery without hurting Dale’s ‘brand’ or whatever.”

  Rhodes lifted a brow. “Your mom is strange.”

  “Rhodes, did you hear what I said?” I asked, ignoring his attempt at humor. “The note came from the marina. It was in your sister’s handwriting.” I swallowed. “We may be able to find some answers. We may be able to find her.”

  Rhodes frowned, leaning back against the edge of the desk. He raked his hands over his stubble before crossing his arms hard across his chest. “How?”

  “I know where Dale keeps his keys,” I whispered. “All of his keys.” Rhodes’ eyes widened at my implication. “Are you up for a little recon mission?”

  “I don’t even understand the concept of this place,” Rhodes whispered as I unlocked the large gate guarding the boat barn. I used to find it funny when Mom called it that, but that’s exactly what it was really — a big metal barn full of boats.

  “It’s just a different way to store your boat. It’s actually better for a lot of the ones around here. Keeps them from sitting in salt water and stuff.”

  Rhodes didn’t comment further as we slipped through the gate. I locked it again behind us and we made our way toward the large building.

  The night air was warm and wet against my skin and the small tendrils of hair hanging from my bun onto my neck were already soaked. Rhodes didn’t seem nervous or tense as we approached the entrance to the building.

  I was both.

  We g
azed up at the columns and rows of boats once we walked inside the barn. I clicked on the flashlight I’d taken from Dale’s garage to illuminate them better and scanned the length of the barn. They were stacked ten high and hundreds across, all facing us stern side.

  “What are we even looking for?”

  “I don’t know, Rhodes. Anything that might connect that note and your sister.” His brows were furrowed, his jaw set. “Why do I get the feeling that you don’t want to be here?”

  He sighed. “Sorry. I’m just not sure how to feel about all of this.” It was then that I noticed the worry hidden behind his strong eyes. I knew what he was feeling. He didn’t want to get his hopes up only to be let down. Or maybe he was afraid of what he’d find. Either way, it was apparent that he may not have been nervous or tense, but he was clearly uncomfortable.

  “Try not to think too much about it. If we find something, great. If not, then we move forward and figure something else out. Okay?”

  Rhodes took a moment to process before gently nodding. “Okay.”

  Grabbing his hand, I pointed the flashlight forward and we dove deeper into the barn.

  We walked slowly down the main hall, shining the light between each row of boats and up through the various columns. Neither of us spoke, and neither of us found anything to speak of. The longer we were there, the more I worried if I’d made a stupid decision. What exactly did I expect to find?

  “Hey wait a second,” Rhodes whispered, his eyes trained on the row of boats to our right. “What is that?”

  I pointed the flashlight to follow his gaze, illuminating something shiny and small near the back wall. Rhodes glanced back at me questioningly before taking a step toward it.

  My heart hammered in my ears as we inched between the boats. When Rhodes and I rounded the front of the boat, he bent slowly, retrieving the object on the ground.

  “What is it?” I asked, voice just above a whisper. Rhodes was staring at whatever was in his hands so intently I wondered if he even heard me.

  “Oh my God.”

  “What?” I leaned up to look closer. “What is it?”

  He shook his head, forehead wrinkled between his eyebrows. “It’s hers.” He held the object out to me — a bracelet. It dangled over his pointer finger as his eyes found mine. “It’s Lana’s. She wore this every day.” He swallowed. “It was a gift from me when we turned sixteen.”

  My heart stopped.

  It was a small, dainty bracelet — a thin chain with one solo pearl charm. Their birthstone. Carefully, I reached out to touch the cool silver and rolled the pearl between my fingers, bringing away a film of dust with them. “It doesn’t seem like it’s been worn in a while.”

  “What the hell?” He shook his head and I was at a loss for words, too. Nothing was making sense. “Do you think it’s the person who took her? Did it happen here?”

  “Maybe,” I said, my stomach knotting at the thought. The soft click of the shutter sounded as I pulled out my camera and took a photo of the bracelet still hanging from his fingers. Every hair on my body was standing at attention, my fight or flight instincts kicking in. I hadn’t been scared before, but I was now. “It wouldn’t be weird for it to be left alone back here. These are the vacationer boats. The employees are lucky if they get sent down here more than once a year to pull one of these boats out.”

  “And you’re positive that the note had to have come from here?”

  I glanced around, trying to find one of the stationery pages stuck in the window of one of the boats around us. Scanning the windshields, I finally found a sheet four rows down. Peeling it from its careful placement, I held it up for Rhodes to inspect.

  “See the bottom logo?” I asked. He nodded, and I pulled the note he’d found on his bike from my pocket. When I held them up next to each other, there was no refuting it. There was just a tiny little piece of the logo on the bottom of the note from Rhodes’ sister, but it was there. I snapped another photo.

  Rhodes pinched the bridge of his nose. I knew his head was spinning, too. “What the fuck is going on?”

  “My thoughts exactly,” a rough voice responded. Rhodes and I turned quickly and were met with a blinding white light. Instinctively, Rhodes threw himself between the offender and myself, serving as a human shield.

  The light dropped, and my stomach fell right along with it when I realized who was holding it.

  A cop.

  “Shit,” Rhodes muttered.

  The cop was young, maybe in his thirties, with caramel skin and a dark buzz cut. His eyes were shaded, but soft, as if he didn’t like busting us any more than we liked getting busted. My eyes adjusted to the light difference and I noticed his name badge read MARTINO.

  “Do you two realize you’re trespassing right now?”

  “I’m sorry sir,” I tried, maneuvering my way around Rhodes. “It’s my fault. I just wanted to—”

  “And do you realize that because you climbed over that fence to get into a clearly marked no-trespassing property, you could face a first-degree trespassing charge?” He shook his head, almost like he was our parent, before calling out some sort of code into his radio along with our location. “Couldn’t even be smart about it. Flashlights? Really? I saw them from the road.”

  “And do you realize you’re being a class A fuck boy right now?”

  “Rhodes!” I warned, shocked at his disrespect. I was trying to talk us out of the situation, Rhodes was ready to make it worse.

  “Wait,” Officer Martino interrupted. “Rhodes? As in William Rhodes?”

  Rhodes didn’t answer. His jaw ticked and he kept his hard eyes trained on the cop, who was now looking at Rhodes in a completely different way. It was as if he recognized him, or as if he was seeing a ghost of his past rise right out of the ground. I knew Rhodes was in and out of juvie when we were younger, but had that reputation really stuck for this long?

  “Copy. Calling the property owner now,” a woman’s voice called over the radio fastened to the officer’s hip, breaking the awkward silence stretching between us. It was my turn to add another twist to the night.

  “Here,” I offered, reaching into my pocket for my phone. The officer pulled his gun, pointing it straight at my chest.

  “Whoa whoa whoa!” Rhodes stepped in front of me again, scowling at the cop. “Are you fucking crazy?”

  “Keep your hands where I can see them!”

  I panicked, dropping my phone completely and letting it shatter on the ground as I lifted my arms above my head. “I’m sorry,” I said with shaky voice. I sounded weak, and in that moment, maybe I was. I’d never been in trouble with law enforcement. I didn’t know how to act. I didn’t understand why this man looked at me like a criminal. “I was just going to call him for you.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Shifting on my feet, I glanced at Rhodes before answering. “I’m Natalie Poxton.” My eyes found the officer’s just in time to see recognition set in. “The property owner is my dad.”

  I’d never stared at my feet for so long.

  My eyes were tracing the stitches on my Keds, following the lining of the laces through each hoop and back. I could hear Mom tapping her finger on the edge of the kitchen counter and even though I hadn’t looked yet, I could feel Dale’s eyes on the point of contact where Rhodes’ hand held mine. None of us had said a word since Officer Martino left, and I definitely didn’t want to be the first to break that silence.

  Disappointing Mom and Dale wasn’t something I was used to. Before now, my only offenses had been minor party incidents that they usually scolded me for before breaking out into laughter. It was child’s play. Something all teenagers in Poxton Beach went through.

  This, however, was not.

  “Mr. and Mrs. Poxton,” Rhodes started, his deep baritone sounding so foreign beneath the blanket of silence we’d been under. “I just want to apologize for our actions tonight. Natalie had nothing to do with what happened. It was my idea.”

 
I snapped my attention to Rhodes, mouth open and ready to correct him, but he gave me a stern look that made me shut it, instead.

  “Well that much is obvious,” Dale retorted. “But you’re notorious for bad ideas, aren’t you, Rhodes?”

  “Dale!” Rhodes squeezed my hand tighter, but I refused to let Dale talk to him that way.

  “Don’t raise your voice at us, young lady,” Mom warned. I couldn’t remember the last time she’d called me young lady.

  “Mom, it wasn’t his fault. It was my idea to break into the boat barn tonight.”

  “Honey,” she said the pet name with a hint of sympathy, as if I didn’t know what I was saying.

  “It’s true! It was my idea. And I’m sorry. But look, nothing was taken, we didn’t break anything. We were just…” My voice trailed off when I realized I couldn’t exactly tell them what we were doing.

  “You were just what, Natalie?” Dale probed. His brows were set in a firm straight line over his hard eyes.

  “I can’t tell you.” I murmured the words, just barely audible over the hum of the refrigerator.

  “Why?” Mom asked. She was heated, angrier than I’d ever seen her. I glanced to Rhodes, but that only fueled her fire. “It’s clear that whatever you were doing, it was something you didn’t want us finding out. And that won’t fly in this household.”

  “I’m sorry. It won’t happen—”

  “Again?” Dale asked, laughing a little. “Oh, you bet your ass it won’t. I don’t know who you’ve become hanging out with this delinquent,” he added, gesturing to Rhodes. “But stealing my keys and trespassing on a property you know you shouldn’t be on is absolutely unacceptable.”