Shameless

by Rosanne Bittner

  Chapter Ten

  June 1857

  The huge caravan trudged beneath the hot New Mexico sun, headed for Fort Defiance. Clay thought how much more pleasant this journey would be if it had been made during the winter months instead of waiting until spring. They were nearly at the fort, where they would rest and meet up with Army Lieutenant Edward Fitzgerald Beale, Superintendent of Indian Affairs in California. Beale had been assigned to assist Clay in this first expedition of an Army campaign using camels.

  An additional forty-four camels had been shipped to Texas, along with more foreigners. At least this time the handlers who had been sent knew what they were doing. Pekah Akim was still with them, but the first two Arabs had gone back home. Major Wayne, who had instigated the whole idea of the camels, had stayed on at Camp Verde through the winter, then had gone back to Washington.

  Clay turned to look back at the strange procession. Twenty-five of the best camels out of the original herd of seventy-seven had been chosen for the trip. Major Keller had explained to Clay that once joined at Fort Defiance by Lieutenant Beale, the pack train would consist of over a hundred horses and mules and at least a dozen wagons. It would be one of the biggest expeditions Clay had ever led, and if it were not for the ungodly hot sun and the knowledge that he would be heading through the deserts of New Mexico and Arizona, he figured the thousand-mile journey into California would be a pleasant enough way to end his Army career.

  He tried to imagine what California was like. Would it prove to be as beautiful as others had told him? His biggest worry was wondering if he could settle and be happy without the Army to keep him busy. This was the only life he had known since Jenny and the baby died.

  It had been a long time since he had had a chance to court a decent woman. The only proper women in Army camps were wives of other officers, sometimes old widows who took in laundry, women who either did not interest him or who belonged to someone else. He was sick of whores, although he had little chance anyway to visit the cleaner, more expensive houses in bigger towns. Duty usually kept him at his home fort or riding the remote plains chasing Indians. The whores who frequently came in by wagon and set up camp outside the fort were not the kind a man cared to be with, if he valued his health. Although the thought of a woman was sometimes almost painful, he stayed away from the filthy tents and bodies of the camp whores.

  He removed his hat, wiping sweat from his brow with a handkerchief he pulled from his back pocket. He put the hat back on and reached down to get his canteen. He wrapped the bridle reins around the pommel of his saddle and uncorked the container, taking a swallow of water. He was beginning to appreciate the marvel of the camels that sauntered along behind him. Once or twice a day the horses had to be watered, but the camels had gone for nearly three weeks without a drink. They would reach Fort Defiance within a day or two, where the strange beasts could slurp to their hearts’ content, building up their reserve for the next few weeks. In that respect the animals were indeed suited for use in the American Southwest. They had already adapted well, and so far there had been no deaths among them.

  He replaced his canteen and unwrapped the reins, turning his thoughts again to California. The only way to bear the heat and the monotonous journey was to keep his mind occupied, and he considered how much money he might need to start his own ranch. He had saved a good deal of his pay for years, finding little to spend it on in such remote country. He was ready to do something different now. In three months he would be finished with the Army.

  They passed a small stucco home, where a Mexican man tended a few sheep. The sheep bleated and scurried around behind the house when the camels came near, and the Mexican man stared in disbelief. His wife, who had been taking down clothes from a line, stopped her labor and gawked at the strange procession. A small boy came running out of the house, followed by an even younger girl, then an older girl. They pointed and stared, the children coming a little closer out of curiosity.

  “Son camellos,” Clay told them. “De muy lejos,” he added, telling them the camels were from far away. The children whispered and talked among themselves, their brown eyes big with intrigue.

  Clay studied them as he rode by, thinking what a gentle, beautiful people most Mexicans were. It was too bad hard feelings remained, too bad the innocent ones had to suffer, innocent ones like Nina Juarez.

  Nina, he thought. For months her memory had plagued him. He had tried to forget the provocative beauty who had haunted his nights for so long after he had left her in Texas. The older Mexican girl he had just seen had stirred his memory, reawakening urges he would rather ignore. He could not help wondering what had happened to Nina. Was she safe and settled? Would her brother stay in Mexico and lead a normal life, keep her protected? He could still see her exquisite face so clearly, remembered the softness of that long, thick, black hair. Again he was reminded of the feel of her body pressed against his own, the taste of her full, exotic mouth.

  “Jesus, Youngblood, you’ve been in the hot sun too long,” he muttered, upset that he still thought about a girl he would never see again. He turned his horse angrily, riding back to check on the long procession of men and horses, wagons and camels. After leaving Fort Defiance, there would be even more men and animals to supervise. A few men complained about the heat, but the camels ambled along unaffected, the Arabs who tended them equally comfortable under the scorching sun. Pekah Akim sported the ever-present grin, nodding to Clay, telling him everything was fine.

  Clay watched for the half-breed Apache scout who had ridden ahead of them. So far, all the way through Comanche country, there had been no problems. The few Indians who had come upon the strange procession had just stared dumbfounded at the camels and ridden off, thinking they had just seen some strange omen. Clay was beginning to think that the camels might best be used to ward off Indian attacks.

  The sun began to set as they left the Mexican family behind them, and Clay decided to also leave behind useless thoughts of Nina Juarez. She was a little troublemaker who could have gotten him kicked out of the Army if Major Keller had not been so lenient with him for letting Nina and her brother go free. He was obviously better off if he never ran across her again.

  “We’ll head into New Mexico,” Mike told the others. The gang of outlaws Emilio had befriended sat around a table in the Pecos Tavern, playing cards. Emilio sat with them. “There are a lot of new settlements farther north. After we do some raiding in New Mexico, we’ll head for Santa Fe. I know a buyer there. Then we’ll take off for Arizona and up into Utah. Utah and Colorado are where the best pickings are. They’re a lot more settled than anyplace around here. The Mormons up in Utah are building quite a settlement. I hear they’re rich. A few raids there ought to bring us a lot of choice horses, as well as maybe even money and gold.”

  “Sí, we will find much more to pick from farther north,” Santos put in. “It is best, I think, to stay out of Texas for a while, if it is true, as Emilio says, that soldiers and Texas Rangers are working hard at catching horse thieves. There is almost no law in New Mexico and farther north and west.”

  “I agree,” Johnny Lane added.

  “Soon as that buyer from Matamoros gets here to take the horses, we’ll head out,” Mike said. “He should be here in a day or two. This whole trip will take us a couple of months, but when it’s over, we’ll be rich men.” He looked at Emilio. “You with us, amigo?”

  Emilio rubbed at his lips, glancing at Nina, who was wiping off tables nearby. The tavern was closed, but the owner had let the men stay so they could talk about their plans privately. Emilio knew Nina was listening, knew she disapproved, but he wanted to impress these men. He missed the danger and excitement of the outlaw life, and besides that, he was sick of working like a common slave for the little money he made.

  “I would like very much to join you,” he told them. “But I will not raid any Mexican settlements. I steal only from gringos.”

  Several of them chuckled. “Watch who you’re talking to
,” Mike told him.

  Emilio grinned. “You are different. There are not many gringos that I like, but you are one. You have treated me and Nina with respect.”

  Mike shrugged. “You’re a good man, Emilio, and you saved my life. You’re good with those horses, too, which could come in handy. Thanks to you, the ones out in that corral are worth more, now that you’ve broken them in. I appreciate that.”

  Emilio scraped up the money he had won and gathered it in his hand. “I want to make a lot of money, señor. Stealing horses is the best way. I have promised Nina that when we have enough, we will settle in California and have a ranch of our own. Maybe we will deal in stolen horses ourselves there, buy and sell them.”

  “Well, I hope you can do that, Emilio,” Mike told him. The man lit a thin cigar, and Nina wondered if he ever changed the checkered shirt and leather vest he wore. His lanky frame was always draped in the same clothes, his face always looked as though he needed a shave. “You just be ready to leave in three days. I imagine someone here can watch after your sister.”

  Emilio glanced at Nina, who met his eyes. He knew she was torn between staying or going. “Sí,” he answered, deciding not to mention that Nina might want to go along. He wasn’t sure yet what she would do, and he knew she was upset that he had not yet discussed this with her.

  “We ride hard and fast, Emilio,” Mike was telling him. “Sometimes people get hurt. You ever shoot anybody?”

  Nina’s heart quickened at the question. Stealing horses was one thing, but shooting innocent people was another.

  “Sí,” Emilio lied. “If they are gringos, I can shoot them.”

  Mike nodded. “Good. Farther north there are good hiding places for escaping the law, places like Robber’s Roost and Brown’s Park. It’s a big country up north, Emilio—dry, hard, beautiful. There are a thousand canyons where a man can hide, huge arroyos, mountains, rock formations with hidden crevices. It’s a great place for men like us when we don’t want to be found. It’s also a place where it’s easy to get lost, so stick close.”

  “Sí, I will.” He abruptly changed the subject. “How do you split the profits?”

  Mike grinned. “A good man always asks that question,” he told him. “I get ten percent. The rest of you split evenly what’s left. With the money going six ways, that gives all of you the incentive to bring in as many horses as you can. We round up mustangs all along the way, adding them to our remuda of stolen horses. If you help break some of the mustangs, we’ll each give you an extra two dollars per horse out of our own pockets, since those horses will be worth more money and we’ll make a bigger profit on them.” His eyes scanned the others at the table. “That all right with you men?”

  They all nodded, young Carlos Baca stealing glances at Nina.

  “It’s settled then. We leave in three days, or as soon as my buyer gets here and takes these horses off our hands.” Mike rubbed at tired eyes. Nina wondered how old he was. His face was lined from years of exposure to the western sun, and his hair was thinning. He looked like he might have been a handsome man when he was younger, but hard living and a general unconcern for his cleanliness detracted from his looks. She guessed him to be perhaps forty, and she wondered what led white Americans, who seemed to have all the advantages, into a life of lawlessness. Her and Emilio’s excuse had been revenge and survival, but none of these men seemed to have any good reason for doing what they were doing. Neither were any of them inclined to discuss their pasts. They were simply a group of men who happened to steal horses for a living and had managed to somehow find each other and join forces. In some ways they were good men, for they were respectful of each other and of her. It seemed strange to picture them out stealing horses and shooting at innocent people…and now Emilio was ready to join them.

  They all rose, their chairs scraping on the wooden floor. A couple of the men, including Mike, headed upstairs. The others left to go to a nearby rooming house where they were staying, all except Emilio and Carlos, who continued to talk excitedly about the coming adventure. Carlos glanced at Nina. “Who will watch after her?” he asked.

  Nina faced them, and Emilio looked a little sheepish. “We will have to talk about it,” he answered.

  Carlos twisted his hat in his hand. “I would like to know if…” He hesitated, moving his eyes back to Nina. “If I might have permission to call on you, señorita, when we come back south.”

  Nina felt a rush of pleasure at the compliment, in spite of the young man’s outlaw ways, but her pleasure was only at his noticing her. She had no real interest in Carlos. Handsome and respectful as he was, the young man did not stir the feelings in her that Clay Youngblood had awakened. Ever since meeting the lieutenant and knowing his kiss, she had been waiting for a man to arouse the same warm, pleasant feelings. It was not that she had been searching, for she still hesitated taking an interest in any man, but she supposed that if the right man came along, like Carmell had told her, she would feel something special.

  “I am sorry, Carlos, but I am not interested in seeing any man,” she answered. “Besides, you are an outlaw. You will never settle down.” She looked warningly at her brother. “And I wish to have a home.”

  “I would settle down, for you, Nina.”

  She looked back at Carlos, dropping her eyes. “Wait until after the raiding, when we return to El Paso. Then we will talk.”

  Carlos and Emilio both frowned. “We?” Carlos asked. “You speak as if you will go, too.”

  Nina looked back at her brother. “It is possible. I wish to talk to Emilio alone, Carlos.”

  “Sí, señorita. But…Mike and the others, they will not want a woman along.”

  Nina tossed her head, facing him haughtily. “I am as good as any man when it comes to stealing horses. Just ask Emilio. I can ride as well, shoot as well, and sometimes I am even better at sneaking the horses away than Emilio. You can use me.”

  Carlos looked her over. “But you are a woman! We will be riding under the hot sun and sleeping under the stars on the hard ground. Sometimes we do not rest for days, and sometimes we run low on food and water. There are snakes and scorpions in that country, bobcats and—”

  “I have lived that way many times,” Nina interrupted. “Please leave us, Carlos.”

  His eyes moved over her skeptically before he finally turned and left. Nina faced Emilio, a look of consternation in her dark eyes. “So, you will go riding off with them without even talking to me about it!” she said angrily. “Is it so easy for you to leave me, Emilio, after all we have been to each other?”

  “I intended to talk to you in the morning. I did not know you would be down here cleaning up tonight.”

  “Doing your work, while you sit and make plans to ride off without me! You know we made a pact to always stay together, and you know it would be dangerous for me to stay here alone.”

  Emilio turned and walked away from her, running a hand through his hair. “I did not intend to leave you here,” he said, facing her again. “I only told the others that because I did not want to bring the subject up yet. I wanted to talk to you first and see how you felt about coming with us. You were right in what you told Carlos. You are good at stealing the horses, Nina, and I can convince Mike and the others of that. They treat you with respect. They are not like the other gringos. You would be safe with them, and instead of just me, there would be six other men to protect you. I thought I would tell Mike that if he lets you come along, you and I will split my share so that the others do not lose by having to split theirs seven ways. They will not mind as long as it does not cost them money. I already knew you would want to come, so I thought I had time to discuss it with you. I wanted to know for certain what Mike’s plans were first.”

  Nina set a washrag onto a table and folded her arms. “You are wrong, Emilio. I do not want to go with you, not to steal horses. I want to go with you only because you are my brother and you are all I have. I know that you want this badly, that you might go even if I refu
se to come. I will go because I want to be with you if something should happen to you. In all these years we have never been apart. We have a duty to each other, an obligation to love each other and watch out for each other. But I do not like the idea of stealing horses again, Emilio. I want a more settled life. I have told you that.”

  His eyes lit up, and he stepped closer. “And we can have a more settled life, Nina! This will be the biggest job we have ever undertaken! We will make a lot of money, and on top of that, for the first time, you will be safe. You won’t have just me to watch out for you, or just your own skills to keep you safe. There will be six other men looking after you! I never thought I would want to work with gringos like Mike and the others, but they are different, Nina. They treat me well, and you, too. This is the best chance we have ever had, don’t you see? I will learn all the good hiding places! I will find out who and where the buyers are! Soon we will be on our own again, and within two years we will be rich!”

  Their eyes held, and Nina felt a strange dread. “Or dead,” she told him.

  Emilio laughed. “It will not happen, Nina. You worry too much.”

  “Do I? We will be deep in gringo country.”

  “There will be eight of us! Nothing can happen, Nina. And you cannot tell me that you do not often think about riding free again on your fine black horse, that you do not think about the adventure of it, the joy of stealing from the greedy American settlers!”

  She turned away. “I think about it—sometimes. But there is a stronger need in me, Emilio—the need to be a woman, to have a home.” She faced him again. “And I do not like Señor Billings asking you if you have ever killed a man. Nor do I like you lying about it! We are not killers, Emilio!”