This Book Isn't Fat, It's Fabulous

by Nina Beck

  “Well, we didn’t know each other, we had never met…but we’ve been talking.”

  “I’m not following.”

  “I’m Thebigun17.”

  “That’s how you pronounce that?” I blurt. “Wait…you’re…”

  “Yeah,” he says, and he has the grace to look sheepish.

  “You’ve been lying to me this whole time?”

  “Sort of, I mean, I tried to tell you,” he says.

  “How? When? How hard is it to say, ‘Hi, Riley, I’m Thebigun17?’ And what kind of screen name is that?”

  “Riley, I tried…I mean, I told you I MySpaced you, and that’s how I got your screen name…and…”

  “Oh my God, and that’s how I met Thebigun17. I didn’t even think of it.”

  He shrugs.

  “I thought I loved you and I didn’t even know I had been talking to you.”

  “Yeah, sorry about that.”

  He sits staring at the water for a moment, and I wonder and think about the conversations we’ve had. All the stories I’ve told him and all the advice he’s given me.

  “You think you might love me? Is there a way you could possibly know?”

  I smile, take a deep—shaky—breath and say, “I’m not sure, that was before this whole stalker confession.”

  “I figured, but if I hadn’t confessed…What were you thinking…”

  “I thought maybe you’d let me kiss you. Not forgive me or anything, because I was a total prat. But, like, as an experiment. To see…”

  He turns and, putting his arm around me, pulls me down to the dock in his arms.

  “Do you use this line on all the guys?” he asks, looking at me—brushing his fingertips over my face. I feel warm and safe and real.

  “Only the kissing one. Not the love one. And only if they stalked me.”

  “Are you sure?” he says, propping himself over me. Looking into my eyes. And I see love there.

  “I’m sure,” I say, pulling his head down until his mouth meets mine.

  And my mind goes blank.

  EPILOGUE

  THEBIGUN17: How was your day?

  RILEDUP: Who cares? You’re going to be here in two days!!!

  THEBIGUN17: Yeah, yeah.

  RILEDUP: You’re not excited?!

  THEBIGUN17: Oh, I’m hopping in my seat. You just can’t tell because you can’t see me.

  RILEDUP: Liar.

  THEBIGUN17: Would you call me a liar if I said I can’t wait to kiss you again?

  RILEDUP: No, but that’s a given.

  THEBIGUN17: Why’s that?

  RILEDUP: Because I’m so fabulous, how could you resist?

  THEBIGUN17: lol. True enough.

  RILEDUP: <3 You.

  I have an important theory about love. My theory is that if you fall in love with the right guy, and this guy is everything you’re looking for (and the list is short and simple: does he love me? does he make me feel fabulous?)…and if you fall in love with him…you both should have the decency to live happily ever after.

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  Writing this book was not a solitary endeavor. Publishing it took a small army (and three semi-nude male models, but those were just for show). I’d like to thank the following people for their invaluable help and guidance…

  …to literary agent Stephen Barbara, for telling me it went to seed after page 23, for being an amazing friend, a patient author’s advocate, and for always being willing to listen to me whine about boys, work, or life in general. I adore you and owe you dinner.

  …to my editor Aimee Friedman, for loving it first and then using her mad editing skills to make it a book worthy of her affections. Every great change (and the fact that it’s all in one tense) starts and ends with her attention and mighty skill; any flaws are my own.

  …to Abby McAden and the FABULOUS team at Scho lastic, thank you for making this dream come true.

  …to my friend and fellow author Ted Malawer, for going above and beyond, whenever it mattered, for helping me keep things in perspective while making me laugh harder and longer than is advisable or particularly healthy.

  …to my friend Michael Stearns, for “less talking, more writing” appointments at the Tea Lounge. I owe the (on deadline) completion of this book to you. A man of more and varied talents, I never have met—it’s an honor and a privilege.

  …to my family, who would kill me if I didn’t add them here. Although they didn’t really do anything except ask if I would be on Oprah. But a special shout-out to my Mom, I love you.

  And, finally, to my boys, who became the basis for every good story I’ve ever told. Thanks for giving me something to whine about.

  READ ON FOR AN EXCERPT FROM This Girl Isn’t Shy, She’s Spectacular

  The companion novel to This Book Isn’t Fat, It’s Fabulous

  #1 TRY TO CHANGE

  Samantha sat right on the edge of Central Park, facing Columbus Circle. She had texted Riley to let her know she was sitting “behind the big monument thing” and she began people watching. People were rushing across the walkway; nobody but Samantha was really sitting, probably because it was too chilly in late January to be sitting outside in the middle of Manhattan. But there she was.

  She watched the cabdrivers fly around the circle and listened as couples chatted on their way to the Time Warner Center.

  She loved the park—she didn’t even mind the city that surrounded it.

  Riley walked up next to Sam and kicked her shoe lightly with her own. “I’m not going to even tell you how difficult it was to get here! I had to take the subway!”

  Sam faked a little gasp that made Riley purse her lips. Sam always admired the way that Riley held herself. She was her own person and never really cared what others thought about her. At least that’s the impression she gave off. She was pretty, but Sam knew it was her personality that really attracted everyone around her. It was very much “I am who I am, and you’ll love me anyway.”

  Sam wished she were more like that. Sam even wished she had Riley’s sense of fashion—like today, for instance, Riley was wearing a long black Anne coat, with two overlarge buttons keeping it closed at her chest; it had a childlike look to it, but coupled with perfect 1950s-style makeup and knee-high boots, she looked like she just stepped out of a magazine. Sam sighed at her own jeans and bubble jacket, but stood up and walked with her toward the shopping center and up to the second-floor bookstore anyway.

  “I haven’t had a café latte in, like, forever,” Riley said as they stood on line together. “But then I lost four pounds.”

  “That’s great?” Sam said.

  “No, I think I only lost it in my bazongas, which means none of my bras feel right, and so I need to gain it back,” Riley said, ordering a café latte and pointing at a muffin behind the glass. The girl behind the counter placed this next to Sam’s tea and rang them up together. Riley waved away Sam’s money when she took out her wallet.

  “You know,” Sam said, carrying her tea away from the counter and spotting a table in the cramped little café space, “you could always think of it as a reason to buy new clothes.”

  Riley stopped with the muffin halfway to her mouth. “Damn, you’re right.” She put the muffin down. “Did they teach you that at NH? I don’t remember that.”

  “They didn’t exactly tie in healthy eating habits with new clothing, no. But they said a lot of ‘Eat a balanced diet of healthy food, blah, blah, blah.’”

  “But I want a muffin!” Riley cried, looking sadly at her now-untouched muffin.

  “You don’t have to be perfect. Just try to eat better on a regular basis,” Sam said.

  “You don’t have to be perfect?” Riley asked. “My Sam is saying you don’t have to be perfect?”

  Sam frowned. “Yeah, that’s kinda what I wanted to talk to you about.”

  “Muffins?”

  “No, being perfect.”

  “Yes, well, it is very difficult,” Riley said, fluffing her hair. Sam smiled a
t her friend.

  “I want to be less perfect,” Sam said.

  “Well, wearing those sneakers and jeans is a really good start,” Riley said.

  “Ha-ha,” Sam said, then stuck out her tongue at Riley. “I didn’t get into the UCLA writing program.”

  Riley dropped her muffin. “What? But your grades…your extracurriculars…they were…”

  “Perfect,” Sam finished for her. “The problem was, my writing sample wasn’t.”

  “But I read it and thought it was great.”

  “Well,” Sam said, looking into her cup of tea, “apparently they thought differently. They said it lacked personality.”

  “What? What does that mean?”

  “It means they want me to write something from experience, something more me, so that I can make it more exciting.”

  “But that sample, that character, was you.”

  Samantha flinched.

  “I mean…”

  “No, no, it’s OK. I understand exactly what you mean,” Sam said, taking a deep breath. “Which is why I need your help.”

  Riley paused, motioning for Sam to continue.

  “I made a list of things that I haven’t done in the past four years, things I want to do this year…and some of it I can’t…”

  “Of course I’ll help!” Riley said, bouncing up and down in her seat. “This is going to be so great! What’s on the list? Can I see the list? Is a haircut on the list, because that would be so perfect…I mean, so wonderful!”

  Samantha touched her hair, which was pulled back into a big puffy ponytail at the back of her head. “Um, well, number one is that I tried to never change, and so I guess…”

  Riley took a deep breath. “Makeover?”

  To Do List: Read all the Point books

  Airhead

  Being Nikki

  By Meg Cabot

  Suite Scarlett

  By Maureen Johnson

  Sea Change

  The Year My Sister Got Lucky

  South Beach

  French Kiss

  Hollywood Hills

  By Aimee Friedman

  Ruined

  By Paula Morris

  This Book Isn’t Fat,

  It’s Fabulous

  This Girl Isn’t Shy,

  She’s Spectacular

  By Nina Beck

  The Heartbreakers

  The Crushes

  By Pamela Wells

  And Then

  Everything Unraveled

  By Jennifer Sturman

  Wherever Nina Lies By Lynn Weingarten

  Summer Girls

  Summer Boys

  Next Summer

  After Summer

  Last Summer

  By Hailey Abbott

  Hotlanta

  By Denene Millner

  and Mitzi Miller

  Hotlanta

  If Only You Knew

  What Goes Around

  In or Out

  By Claudia Gabel

  In or Out

  Loves Me, Loves Me Not

  Sweet and Vicious

  Friends Close,

  Enemies Closer

  Top 8

  By Katie Finn

  Love in the Corner Pocket

  The Comeback

  By Marlene Perez

  Kissing Booth

  By Lexie Hill

  Pool Boys

  Meet Me at the Boardwalk

  By Erin Haft

  Popular Vote

  By Micol Ostow

  Kissing Snowflakes

  By Abby Sher

  Breakfast at Bloomingdale’s

  By Kristin Kemp

  Once Upon a Prom

  By Jeanine Le Ny

  Dream

  Dress

  Date

  Secret Santa

  Be Mine

  By Sabrina James

  21 Proms

  Edited by Daniel Ehrenhaft

  and David Levithan

  Point www.thisispoint.com

  COPYRIGHT

  No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without written permission of the publisher. For information regarding permission, write to Scholastic Inc., Attention: Permissions Department, 557 Broadway, New York, NY 10012.

  Copyright © 2008 by Nina Beck

  All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of publisher.

  E-ISBN: 978-0-545-23212-8

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Beck, Nina.

  This book isn’t fat, it’s fabulous / by Nina Beck.—1st ed. p. cm.

  Summary: Sixteen-year-old Riley Swain, pushed into spending Spring Break at an upstate New York “fat farm” by her father’s fiancée, is happy with her weight but finds she has a lot to learn about friendship and love.

  [1. Interpersonal relations—Fiction. 2. Boarding schools—Fiction. 3. Schools—Fiction. 4. Self-esteem—Fiction. 5. Overweight persons—Fiction. 6. New York (N.Y.)—Fiction. 7. New York (State)—Fiction.] I. Title: This book is not fat it is fabulous. II. Title.

  PZ7.B380783Thi 2008

  [Fic]—dc22

  2007048889