The Memory Jar

by Tricia Goyer

  Something didn’t seem right to Jathan. They walked the dirt path down the mountain, but the path seemed slightly different than before. Wider maybe. He also noticed dried horse manure on the trail. Had he seen that on the way up? Maybe it had been there, but he’d been focused on other things, or rather people — Sarah.

  “So Jathan, what type of game are you hoping to hunt for this season?” Hope stretched her legs as she walked beside him, trying to keep up with his long-legged gait.

  “Deer, elk, not sure.”

  Their pace was quicker than when they’d headed up. The slope helped with that. His eagerness to see Sarah and make sure she was safe had something to do with it too.

  “Oh, ja.” Hope gave a simple reply, most likely guessing he didn’t want to talk.

  They continued on for what seemed like thirty minutes, forty. The sky to the south darkened and at each turn Jathan was sure they would come across Sarah.

  Where was she? He picked up his pace to a jog now, worry flooding over him.

  “Hey, what are you doing?” Amos called behind him.

  Just ahead, something on the trail caught Jathan’s attention and he paused. It was a log. He rushed up to it and looked down. It wasn’t a new log, but one that had been there a while. One he surely would have seen on his way up. Fear stabbed his heart like a hot knife, and suddenly he knew why he hadn’t seen it. Why they hadn’t come upon Sarah yet.

  His hands balled into fists at his sides and he kicked the log. Bits of wood splintered off and scattered on the trail. Jathan removed his wide-brimmed hat from his head and tossed it to the ground. How could he be so stupid?

  “Hey, Jathan …” Amos bent over and picked up the hat, handing it to him. “What’s wrong?”

  “We took the wrong trail. It’s my fault. It’s my fault.”

  Eve and Hope rushed closer. Their cheeks were red from exertion. They stood silently, unsure of what was happening.

  Jathan pointed to the log. “That wasn’t here. And where is all the snow we trudged over? I’ve been noticing horse manure on the way down that wasn’t there on the way up. This isn’t the right trail. We went the wrong way.”

  Amos’s eyes widened and a gasp escaped his lips. “Sarah.”

  “Ja!” Jathan ran his hand through his hair. “And it’s my fault.”

  Amos sank into a squatting position and shook his head. “Come to think of it, we faced the cabin when we climbed the hill and we walked parallel to it when we left.”

  “Oh ne.” Hope’s hand flew to her mouth. “Oh ne, oh ne.” She looked to Jathan. “It’s not yer fault, it’s mine.”

  Her sister grasped her arm. “What? What is it?”

  “Dat told me something important this morning when we were leaving. You were still putting on yer hiking boots, but when I walked outside, he paused from chopping wood and told me to watch ourselves. He also told me to watch the trails, because there are two that go to the summit of Robinson Mountain. One for people, one for horses. He said horses can get jumpy, so it’s best not to take the horse trail up … or down.” She looked to Amos and then Jathan. “I’m so sorry. I was upset with my sister fer going so slow and was not paying gut attention. I forgot he mentioned it until now.”

  “That means Sarah’s on the other trail,” Amos spouted.

  “It also means we have to find a way to get back to her, and fast.”

  “Look!” Eve pointed through the trees. Jathan followed her finger and noticed a glimmer of light blue. It was the lake. It was farther down than he thought it would be. He doubted they were even halfway down this trail. Who knew how it wound around to the lake? It could take another hour — time they didn’t have.

  “I’m heading back up.” Jathan rolled up his sleeves, adrenaline pumping through him.

  “Why up? Don’t you think it would be better to go down? Maybe Sarah has already started that way.” Amos looked to the sky. “Surely if she saw the storm coming she would have started down.”

  A stirring in his chest told Jathan otherwise. “Maybe not. Maybe she’s still waiting. Maybe she headed up the hill looking fer us.” He blew out a breath. “I’d rather run up this path and find the right trail than go all the way to the bottom and have to climb back up the other side. And also, what if we get to the lake and she’s not there? We won’t know if she continued on to where our driver is going to pick us up or if she’s still on the hill. If I go to the top and head down, I’ll be able to check the path she was on all the way from the top.”

  “Ja, that makes sense.” Amos crossed his arms over his chest. “Should I go with you?”

  Panic widened Eve’s eyes, and Hope clung to her sister.

  “Ne.” Jathan shook his head. “Make sure these two get down safely. If Sarah’s not at the lake, keep going. Go all the way to the van.”

  “And then what?” Eve asked. “Should we ask the driver to wait, or should we go back to town and get help?”

  Jathan rubbed his eyes, unsure of the answer.

  “I doubt you’ll get there before three o’clock, and the driver will already have been waiting for a while.”

  “Wait a while more, I suppose. Maybe thirty minutes. And if we don’t come by five o’clock … or it gets too dark because of the storm … then go for help. Sarah’s injured, and I don’t want her trying to walk down a dark trail. If worse comes to worst, we’ll have to stay the night in these woods … but I want to make sure Sarah won’t have to do so alone.”

  Twelve-year-old Sarah turned over on her side. Not hearing Patty’s breathing, she stretched out her hand and felt the bed next to her. The mattress was warm, but just barely.

  Sarah sat up, rubbed her eyes, and then opened them. “Patty?” she whispered into the dark room. No one answered, and Sarah kicked off the covers and then stood.

  The door to Patty’s room was partly open. Sarah checked her sleeping kerchief to make sure it was still in place and then hurried through the door into the living room.

  Sarah’s toes curled up as she walked on the cold, wood floor. A crackle snapped in the woodstove as the flames died down. Sarah looked in the kitchen first, checking to see if Patty had gotten up to get a drink of water. She wasn’t there. Then Sarah looked at the stairs, wondering if Patty’d gone up to her parents’ room. She doubted it. Sarah checked the bathroom, but still no Patty. Then Sarah got an idea and hurried to the mat beside the front door. Sure enough, Patty’s shoes were missing.

  Sarah opened the door and stepped outside. The air was cold. She looked to her left and then to the right. There … Patty sat on the porch swing, a quilt wrapped around her shoulders.

  “Sarah. What are you doin’? No shoes, no blanket? Hurry now.” Patty opened the quilt. Sarah gladly sat beside Patty and pulled one side of the quilt all the way around her, tucking it under her chin.

  “What are you doing out here?” Sarah dared to ask. “It’s the middle of the night.”

  Patty looked at her. The moonlight lit Patty’s face.

  “Don’t you get up at night jest to look at the stars?”

  Sarah shook her head and a soft laugh slipped from her lips. “Can’t say I do.”

  “Ja, me neither, but I thought it would be a good time to start, now that we’re getting older.”

  Sarah playfully punched Patty’s knee under the quilt. “Ach, we’re far from old.”

  “I disagree. Nearly thirteen and only a little more than a year left in school. We need to pay attention to things.”

  Sarah rested her head on the back of the porch swing and kicked her feet against the porch so they rocked. “Like those stars up there? Is that what we’re supposed to pay attention to?”

  “Ja, and the sounds of the forest. Do you hear that?”

  Sarah listened but didn’t hear anything other than the chains of the porch swing creaking. She was just about to tell Patty when she heard what sounded like crying.

  Sarah’s eyes widened. “Is that a baby?”

  “Ne, a coyote.”
<
br />   “Will it hurt us?”

  Patty shook her head. “No, Dat says they’re special. When there are coyotes here, we know it’s safe and the wolves aren’t around. Or bears either.”

  “That’s good. I’ll have to remember that.”

  “Yer special too, Sarah.” Patty turned to her and smiled. Then she pointed to the ground. “See, even yer moon shadow is pretty-like.”

  Sarah followed Patty’s gaze. The moon had cast their shadows onto the porch. Sarah touched her sleeping kerchief, noticing the way it stuck up. She chuckled. “Speaking of coyotes, it looks like I have coyote ears in that shadow.”

  They sat and rocked a bit longer, and Sarah looked at the stars that filled the velvet-black sky. It amazed her that a God who made all of the stars — filled the sky with them — would think of her, make her.

  After a while Sarah’s toes felt like ice. “Can we go inside yet? I’d hate to have yer Dat and Mem come out here in the morning and find us frozen solid.”

  Patty yawned. “Ja. All better now.” They rose and scooted together toward the front door, the quilt still wrapped around them.

  “What’s better?” Sarah smiled when they stepped into the house and shut the door behind them. Even though the fire had died down, the inside was much warmer than it was outside.

  “I’m better.” Patty shook her head. “I woke up after a bad, bad dream. I was lost up on the mountain. It was cold, and even though I screamed and screamed, nobody came fer me. Mem always told me to think of gut things when I have bad dreams, so I thought of God and the stars and my best friend.”

  Patty hurried back to her bedroom and climbed under the blankets. Sarah followed and realized that if she’d had a nightmare, she would have thought of the very same things.

  She also trembled, thinking how horrible it would be to be lost and alone like in Patty’s dream. Thankfully, she didn’t have to worry about that. She could push those thoughts from her mind and fall back to sleep to the sound of Patty’s soft breathing.

  CHAPTER

  8

  Wake up, Sarah. Yer jest dreaming,” she whispered into the cold forest. “Jest like Patty used to have nightmares about being lost in the woods, maybe this is jest a dream.” The only problem was, this wasn’t a dream. It was real. Yet knowing that, Sarah also knew Patty’s solution to pushing bad dreams out of her mind would work in this situation as well. I’ll think of God and the stars and my best friend.

  So she did that. She thought of God, who was with her now. Who had brought glimpses of peace even when her heart ached most.

  She thought of the stars. So far away, yet glowing because God made them. If he created universes like that, couldn’t he control the bears in one square mile around her?

  And when she thought of a friend, the strangest thing happened — it was Jathan’s face that filled her mind. She hadn’t tried to impress him, instead she was impressed. He was gentle, kind, easy to talk to. He was handsome and full of humor. Why hadn’t she noticed it before?

  Just like with Patty, Sarah hadn’t realized what she needed — whom she needed — until God stepped in. She just hoped God would step in again and help Jathan find her. Deep down, she knew he was looking. “Hello? Help! Somebody!” she called as she had been for the last hour. “Somebody? Jathan!”

  It was mostly dark now because of the storm. Only a gray glow through the clouds told her the sun hadn’t completely gone down. She was frozen. Her skin was numb, and it would only get colder as the night pressed in. Why hadn’t she thought about putting some essentials in her backpack like matches and warm socks and more food?

  She had a few cookies left over from earlier. She’d packed extras for her friends. She ate two and saved one for … for when? Later in the night? Or morning? She hoped it didn’t come to that, but guessed it could. Had the others made it to the driver and the van? Were they heading back to the West Kootenai even now to call for help? Surely they weren’t lost on this mountain too.

  Her guess was they’d already made it down and would call search and rescue, but living in Montana as long as she had, she knew a few things about search and rescue. They had to come from Kalispell, which was over an hour-and-a-half drive away. They also never launched search parties at night, but waited until morning to keep members of their own team safe.

  Sarah looked in her backpack again, as if wishing something else would show up. Even her water bottle was empty. She’d finished that off earlier when she was hiking, thinking she was almost back to the lake and the spring.

  He is with me. God is watching over me. He knows where I am. He’s sending someone to find me even now…

  As those thoughts looped in her mind, Sarah started to sing as loudly as she could. She hoped it would scare away any wildlife. Or maybe someone on the trail might hear her. But mostly, she hoped it would calm her own pounding heart.

  “Sweet are the promises,

  Kind is the word,

  Dearer far than any message man ever heard;

  Pure was the mind of Christ,

  Sinless I see;

  He the great example is, and pattern for me.

  “Where he leads I’ll follow,

  Follow all the way.

  Where he leads I’ll follow,

  Follow Jesus ev’ry day.

  “Sweet is the tender love

  Jesus hath shown,

  Sweeter far than any love that mortals have known;

  Kind to the erring one,

  Faithful is he;

  He the great example is, and pattern for me.

  “Where he leads I’ll follow,

  Follow all the way.

  Where he leads I’ll follow,

  Follow Jesus ev’ry day.”

  Sarah sang her mother’s favorite hymn two times through, and after the second time, just as she was about to sing again, she heard the sound of movement. Large movement, like something clambering through the forest. She thought about calling out. After all, maybe it was Jathan or Amos. Yet as the sound grew louder, Sarah wrapped her arms around herself, fear freezing her like a statue. A scream rose in her throat but stuck there. Just when she thought for certain she’d see the snout of a gigantic bear, something appeared. The form moving down the pathway was a man!

  Sarah rose and waved her arms. “Jathan! Here! I’m here!”

  Jathan tried to stop in his tracks, but his momentum slid him forward.

  She expected a scolding for going off the trail. She waited for his explanation for why they hadn’t shown up. But instead, Jathan rushed forward and stood before her, taking her hands in his. His hands were warm, and she resisted the urge to step into his embrace and let his whole body warm her.

  “Sarah, I’m so sorry. Will you forgive me?”

  “Forgive you?” She tilted her head back. Surprise arched her eyebrows.

  “First, that I left you alone on the trail. And second …” He squeezed her hands tighter. “Second, it’s my fault yer here. At the top, I was in such a hurry to get down, to see you, that I led us down the wrong trail. There are two trails leading down from the top,” he explained. “We had no idea until it was too late.”

  Sarah thought about asking about the second trail, but something else he said mattered more. “You were in a hurry to come back fer me?”

  Jathan’s mouth dropped open slightly, and he released her hands. “I, uh, I was worried about you. The view was amazing, but I felt bad you weren’t there. I felt even worse that I’d left you. I should have gone with my inner feelings and stayed by yer side.”

  “Danki, but I have to know … how did you find this trail, and how did you know I went down it?”

  Jathan glanced around, as if sizing up where they were. He nodded. “I will tell you, but first we need to start a fire while we have even a little light left. It’ll be a long, cold night if we don’t.” He turned to find some wood.

  “We’re going to be here all night?”

  “We can’t hike out in the dark. It’s too dangerous,
especially with you injured.” He looked over his shoulder at her. “But I’ll make you as comfortable as I can, Sarah. I promise.”

  Dark clouds blocked out most of the fading sunlight, and Sarah blew a heavy breath, as if that alone could push the coming rain the other direction.

  Jathan dug under a pile of dead branches, looking for dry wood. When he found enough, Sarah knelt beside him and they layered the sticks. She also brushed aside other branches or foliage to give them a wide, clear ring — not that she thought a forest fire could start in this damp place, but it was better to be safe than sorry.

  Moisture from the ground seeped through her skirt and chilled her legs.

  Jathan pulled a match from his pants pocket.

  “Wait, before you do that.” She rose and hobbled over to a tree, peeling back layers of moss until she found a large, dry piece.

  He eyed her.

  “It’ll be easier to light the moss than the wood.” She handed it to him and then sat on her log, rubbing her ankle.

  Jathan packed the moss around the wood, lighting it.

  “I’m so thankful you brought matches.” Sarah rubbed her hands together.

  “ne, Amos did. All the others emptied their things into my backpack jest in case we couldn’t make it down to the bottom of the mountain before dark.”

  The small flame flickered and danced. A cold wind swirled, nearly blowing it out. Jathan hunched down, cupping his hands to shield the flame from the wind. A moment later, the flame grew, igniting the wood.

  “There.” Jathan sat back on his heels. “That should knock off a bit of the chill.”

  “Too bad we don’t have a steak to cook over that fire. I’m starved.”

  “I have half of Hope’s sandwich and an apple from Eve if yer hungry.”

  “Famished … but I’ll only eat if we share.”

  Jathan nodded, and they divided what was left of their food. They shared the half of sandwich, and she ate the apple while he finished off her last cookie.

  When the food was gone, Jathan’s stomach growled. It must take a lot of food to fill up such a big man, Sarah thought.

  He rubbed his stomach. “I should have thought to bring more supplies. These are the mountains of Montana, not a local park.”