At Seventeen

by Gerri Hill

  Her mother glanced at her sharply. “Alice? You still see her?”

  “Of course.”

  “And her cancer?”

  “It’s in remission.” She paused, wondering how much to tell her mother. “Shannon and her brother, Jarod, are back in Brook Hill. They’re opening up a store.”

  “A store?”

  “A natural foods store. They own three others,” she said, feeling proud for Shannon.

  “Really? Well, at least she didn’t follow in her mother’s footsteps.”

  Madison bit her lip, wanting to defend Alice but knowing her mother was only baiting her. “Would you like to see the pool?”

  “I’m not sure why you bothered with a pool. You have your choice of three at the country club,” she said.

  “Yeah, but some of her lowlife friends aren’t allowed in the country club.”

  They both turned, Madison nearly laughing at Shannon’s words. “I thought you were still out of town.”

  Shannon sat a pizza box and a six-pack of beer on the counter. “Mrs. Lansford, you’re looking well,” she said, holding out her hand.

  Her mother stared at Shannon’s hand and for a moment, Madison was afraid she would refuse to acknowledge it. She finally touched it briefly.

  “Shannon Fletcher, it’s been a long time,” her mother said. “In fact, I hardly recognized you.”

  Madison knew at one time, Shannon was as terrified of her mother as she herself had been. Today, however, Shannon simply oozed confidence. She gave her mother a lazy smile as she picked up the beer. “I’ll take that as a compliment.” She slid her eyes to Madison. “It’s all yours, huh?”

  “Yes.” She glanced at the pizza box. “Dinner?”

  “I thought we could christen the place, if you don’t already have plans,” she said as she put the beer in the fridge. “My mom said you closed on it today.”

  “Thanks, I’d love pizza. When did you get back?”

  “A few hours ago.”

  Madison realized they had been ignoring her mother. She turned back to her now. “I’ll show you the rest of the house, if you want,” she offered.

  “I think I’ve seen enough.” She looked pointedly at Shannon. “And how long have you been back in Brook Hill?”

  “Oh, I don’t know. Going on three months, I guess.”

  “I see.” Her eyes narrowed. “Madison, you will escort me out, please.”

  She glanced at Shannon. “Be right back.”

  Her mother was silent until they reached the garage. “And I suppose we have Shannon Fletcher to thank for putting all these crazy ideas in your head?”

  “Mother,” Madison warned.

  “She always brought you down, Madison. Always. And now she’s back and you—”

  “Stop it,” Madison said firmly. “I will not have this discussion with you. Shannon is my friend. She’s always been my friend. My choice to divorce Stephen has nothing to do with Shannon. Now please, I’d like for you to leave. Once I get furniture and everything, I’ll have you and Father over. Ashton comes home tomorrow, by the way.”

  “Yes, Stephen told me. Some nonsense about him quitting medical school. Your father and I will not stand—”

  “It’s his choice, not yours,” she said with finality. “Goodbye, Mother.” She punched the button to close the garage door, leaving her mother staring at her in disbelief. She shook her head, wondering why she’d been so scared of her all these years.

  She found Shannon standing by the pool, and she paused in the kitchen, watching her through the windows. While they were both so far removed from where they’d been as teens, even young adults, Shannon was still as attractive to her as she’d always been. When they were growing up, Madison was always the prim and proper one, her clothes always immaculate and of the latest fashions. Shannon was quite the opposite—rarely seen in anything other than jeans or shorts, the epitome of casual and everything Madison wished she could be. The constraints her mother had on her were firm, though, and only in Madison’s dreams had she been able to break free of those controls.

  Yet here they were again. Shannon was back in her life…somewhat. Their attempt at friendship was just that—an effort to rebuild something they’d lost years ago. But underneath it all, there was that attraction, that pull that had always been there, even though Shannon denied that it lingered still. If there was one person on this earth that Madison could read like a book, it was Shannon.

  Madison moved finally, noting the pizza box was missing. She glanced around, seeing the oven lights on, no doubt keeping it warm. She opened the fridge, which was completely bare except for the beer that Shannon had brought. A six-pack that now held five. She took one for herself and joined Shannon out on the patio.

  Shannon took the bottle from her at Madison’s failed attempt to open it. She produced an opener from her pocket and popped the top off.

  “Not a screw top,” Shannon explained as she handed her the beer. “But I do believe this is the first time I’ve ever seen you drink a beer.”

  “You’d be right.” Madison took a swallow, then had to prevent herself from spitting it out. “God, that’s awful,” she said with a grimace.

  Shannon laughed. “Beer is an acquired taste, much like fine wine.”

  “Maybe I should stick to fine wine then,” she said, daring to take another sip. It tasted no better the second time.

  “So how are things with your mother?” Shannon asked.

  “My mother doesn’t quite know what to make of the new me,” she said. “I would venture to say she doesn’t like me very much.”

  “But you’re speaking.”

  “We’re speaking. We’re not really talking,” she clarified. “My mother doesn’t want to talk or should I say listen? She wants to dictate to me how things should be.”

  “As she’s always done.”

  “Yes. Which is why she doesn’t care for the new me,” Madison said. “Ashton comes back tomorrow.”

  Shannon nodded. “Yeah, that’s what Mom said.”

  “So she tells you everything?”

  Shannon raised her eyebrows. “Doesn’t she tell you everything?”

  Madison nodded slightly. “She did mention that once you got back, you weren’t going to stay long. Are you running away from Brook Hill again?”

  Shannon met her eyes, albeit briefly. “Not yet, no. We’ve got a managers’ training scheduled. It’s something we do once a year. Both Jarod and I usually attend, but with the new store going in, he’s going to stay here.”

  “How long will you be gone?”

  “I leave on Monday. It’s a two-day event, but I’ll head to my house and check on things. Charlotte and Tracy are planning a dinner party for that Friday night. I’ll probably drive back on Sunday.” At Madison’s raised eyebrows, Shannon clarified. “The friends I was telling you about.”

  “And are they also friends with, what was her name? Ally?”

  Shannon nodded. “Yes, she’ll be there.”

  Madison tried very hard to keep her expression even, although she avoided Shannon’s curious gaze. Instead, she turned to the pool.

  “I don’t know if I’m more interested in furnishing the inside or getting patio furniture and a table for out here,” she said. “I rarely used our backyard. It was designed for entertaining and it was as sterile as the inside was,” she admitted.

  “Did you entertain much?”

  Madison sighed. “Yes. Stephen took over his father’s law firm several years ago. Thanks to my father, his clients are pretty much the Who’s Who of Brook Hill.”

  “And you won’t miss that?”

  “God, no.”

  Shannon walked farther along the sidewalk, away from the pool. An extension of the sidewalk was off the side, and Madison watched as Shannon inspected it.

  “Great place for a gas grill,” she said. “You know, for those times you want to throw a steak on.”

  Madison smiled at her. “Is that something a vegetarian should
be suggesting?”

  “No. Don’t tell anyone,” she teased, but the smile didn’t last long. She glanced at the house. “Pizza?”

  Madison nodded, noting the distance that had suddenly grown between them. She didn’t know what to say to diminish it.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Shannon stood in her driveway, noticing the lawn had been recently mowed. She made a mental note to thank Greg, the neighbor’s high school son. She’d lived here four years and whenever she was away, he always took care of her yard. She eyed the garage, but instead, pulled out her keys and went to the front door, her overnight bag slung on one shoulder.

  The staleness of the house hit her immediately and she opened windows, letting in some fresh air. It was warm enough outside for the AC, but having the house closed up like it was, it was still cool inside. She moved about at will, landing in the kitchen. She opened the fridge, glad she’d thought to clean out all perishables when she’d left three months earlier. Two beer bottles and a can of Coke were her choices of drink. Well, there were the water bottles, but she grabbed a beer instead.

  She walked through the house aimlessly, her glance landing on familiar items. She went down the hallway, pausing to look into her bedroom. The bed was in Brook Hill, of course, leaving a void in the room. She went to the spare room and pushed the door opened. It was as she’d left it, and she tossed her bag on the bed. When she’d moved to her mother’s, she hadn’t considered sleeping arrangements here. She only wanted to be comfortable and taking her bed with her was a must.

  Shannon went back through the house and stood in the living room, wondering why she was feeling so uneasy. This restlessness had followed her all week and she couldn’t shake it. Truth was, she wanted to be back in Brook Hill, as strange as that sounded. Oh, it would be good to see Charlotte and Tracy again, but she wasn’t up for a party. Actually, she wasn’t up to seeing Ally.

  She finally went back into the kitchen and out through the back door, finding a chair in the shade. She sunk down and stretched her legs out, balancing the beer bottle on her stomach, looking at the familiar surroundings, yet feeling so out of place. Maybe since being back in Brook Hill she had realized how little this resembled a home and how it was very much just a house she lived in when she wasn’t bouncing around from store to store. But she didn’t want to dwell on that. That would only make her miss what she didn’t have.

  Which, in turn, brought Madison to mind. She admitted that, yes, she missed her. Even though there was a tension between them whenever they were alone, they were still friendly with each other. That part was easy. But constantly trying to tell herself that she wasn’t still attracted to Madison was exhausting.

  She thought back to their impromptu pizza party, the two of them sitting on the floor in Madison’s kitchen. She smiled as she remembered Madison’s face as she bravely finished off the beer she didn’t like. But her smile faded as she also remembered the look in Madison’s eyes when she’d mentioned the party…and Ally.

  But hell, she didn’t know what Madison wanted from her. She was still married, for God’s sake. She was still…married to a man.

  Shannon got up abruptly, ending that train of thought. She went inside to take a shower. She knew neither Charlotte nor Tracy would be upset if she arrived early. She only hoped they’d be as understanding if she left early as well.

  * * *

  “Well, she returns,” Charlotte said, hugging Shannon warmly. “Good to see you again.”

  “You too. I hope you don’t mind,” she said. “I’m a bit early.”

  “I was hoping you’d come early. Tracy is busy in the kitchen. We’ll have a few minutes to talk.”

  Shannon nodded. “Let me pop in and say hello.”

  “I’ll meet you on the patio.”

  Shannon peeked in the kitchen, finding Tracy bent over, putting something in the oven. “Smells good,” she said.

  Tracy popped up, her face breaking into a smile. “Shannon, you’re early,” she said as she moved closer for a hug. “We’ve missed you.”

  “Thanks. I missed you guys too.”

  “You’ve been gone three months and you’ve called us twice. Does that mean you’ve found someone to occupy your time?”

  Shannon shook her head. “Just been busy,” she said vaguely.

  “So you don’t mind that Ally is coming tonight?”

  “No, of course not. It’ll be good to see her. We actually spoke on the phone earlier this week.”

  “Good. Because I didn’t want to make things uncomfortable for you, in case, you know,” Tracy said with a teasing smile.

  “If you are insinuating that Madison is back in my life, then no. Not like that anyway.”

  “But you’ve seen her?”

  “Yes. I’ve actually had dinner with her a couple of times.”

  Tracy smiled broadly. “That’s great. Because—”

  “I told you, it’s not a fairytale,” Shannon warned.

  “Oh, I know. But your story broke my heart. I hope—”

  “Let’s stick to the present,” she said quickly. “I’m supposed to join Charlotte on the patio. Pretense of visiting, but I’m sure she wants to shrink my head,” Shannon said with a smile.

  “Yes, those damn psychologists,” Tracy laughed. “Always want to see what’s going on in your head.” She pointed to the kitchen bar. “There’s wine,” she said. “Or beer. Whatever you want.”

  “I’ll wait,” Shannon said.

  Charlotte was sitting alone on the patio, the ceiling fan blowing cool air around. She pulled out a chair next to her.

  “You look tired,” Charlotte observed.

  “Long week,” she said, but Charlotte continued to study her.

  “So, on our few phone calls, you’ve been very noncommittal as to what it’s like being back in Brook Hill.”

  Shannon sighed. “Well, Dr. Rimes, it’s actually been better than I expected.”

  “In what way?”

  Shannon looked away, wondering why she was allowing Charlotte to question her as if she was one of her patients. Maybe because she wanted—needed—to talk.

  “I’ve seen Madison,” she said. “Quite often, actually.”

  “Because of your mother?”

  “Initially, yes.” She glanced at her quickly. “We’ve had dinner a couple of times. And she bought a new house.”

  Charlotte simply raised her eyebrows.

  “She’s left Stephen. She’s filed for divorce.”

  Charlotte leaned back. “Wow. I didn’t see that coming. From everything you’ve told us, she was very robotic in her life, her marriage. What changed?”

  “Are you thinking I had something to do with it?”

  “Did you?”

  Shannon shook her head. “No. In fact, she made it clear that it wasn’t about me. I think, it’s just that she’s older now, more confident in herself. Plus her son is gone, is moving on with his life, and I think she realized how unhappy she really was. That decision was made before I showed up.”

  “So the timing of it is just a coincidence?”

  “Coincidence or not, she needed to get out of her marriage. I’m happy she did. She’s a completely different person now. She’s more like her old self. The few times I’ve seen her in the last fifteen, sixteen years, she’s been…yeah, robotic. Going through the motions.”

  “And have you two resolved anything?”

  “Resolved? What do you mean?”

  Charlotte shook her head, going on to another question. “Have you talked about your past yet?”

  “Not really. It’s been brought up, of course. But we haven’t dissected it, if that’s what you mean.”

  Charlotte leaned closer, her voice low. “Do you still have feelings for her?”

  It was a question Shannon had asked herself, but she hadn’t dared to answer it. Yes, she still cared for Madison, that much was obvious. But those feelings from years ago, those insane feelings where nothing else mattered but Madison, su
rely those feelings were gone. She’d told Madison she was past all that. Problem was, only a small part of her heart truly believed that. While she and Madison hadn’t been alone much, when they were, there was always some tension between them. Sexual? Perhaps. Even though she had made a concerted effort to leave their past relationship in the past, there were times when she looked at Madison that their past didn’t seem all that long ago. She swore she could still remember the taste of her skin, the sound of her sighs, the musky scent of her arousal.

  She turned to Charlotte, not shying away from her discerning gaze. “I’ll probably always have feelings for her,” she admitted. “Truth is, we’re kinda walking on eggshells around each other.”

  “For fear of what?”

  Shannon shrugged. “Fear of the past.”

  “Afraid that it’ll happen again?”

  Shannon took a deep breath. “Yes.” She paused. “And afraid that it won’t.”

  Charlotte reached over and patted her knee but, surprisingly, said nothing else. A few minutes later Tracy came out with a wine bottle and three glasses.

  “I thought we could have a glass before the others get here,” she said. She eyed them suspiciously. “Charlotte, please tell me you haven’t been questioning her to death.”

  Shannon laughed. “Only as much as I let her.” She took a glass from Tracy. “Thanks.”

  “So, how long will you stay?”

  “I’m leaving in the morning,” she said.

  “Oh,” Tracy said, her voice sounding disappointed. “We were hoping you’d stay the weekend.”

  “I need to get back,” Shannon said.

  “Not too many months ago you were dreading going to Brook Hill. Now you’re rushing to get back there,” Charlotte said, stating the obvious.

  “Jarod and his family are coming on Sunday,” she said. “They close on their house Monday, so he’ll be back and forth moving them. I need to be there for the contractors,” she explained. It wasn’t imperative that she be there, of course, but they didn’t need to know that. She was surprised, however, that she was actually making up an excuse to be there.

  “So we’ll only get to see you tonight?” Tracy asked.

  “Yeah. But I’m sure I’ll be back before too long,” she said, knowing that probably wasn’t the case.