Public Marriage, Private Secrets

by Helen Bianchin

  If it hadn’t been for Teresa’s illness…

  Would Raúl have used his persuasive power not to mention a degree of emotional blackmail to bring Gianna to fulfil Teresa’s wish?

  Gianna had refused once, too hurt and too stubborn to consider Raúl’s avowal of truth. If…if she’d filed for divorce, as she had thought to be the logical step to gain closure, would he have sought to dissuade her? Suggested a reconciliation? Maybe not.

  The realisation of how close she’d come to losing him almost crushed her.

  Tears welled up in her eyes and threatened to spill.

  ‘Don’t.’ It was a despairing groan dredged up from his soul, and he touched a gentle finger to her trembling lips. ‘Don’t…please.’

  Oh, God. Where did they go from here?

  Her eyes met his, and locked, silently begging him to understand. How did one compensate for the loss of three years? So many days…more than a thousand nights.

  Had he lain awake aching for her as she had for him, only him? Examining every word, every action, in vivid detail…and longing to go back and change some of those words.

  She should have fought for him…fought for what they’d shared. What she’d believed they had together.

  Instead she’d run, escaping to the other side of the world, convinced it was the right move, the only move she could make.

  Refusing, in mindless agony, to listen to or condone his truth, because…why? There had seemed so many legitimate reasons at the time. And she’d been so emotionally distraught she hadn’t listened to reason or thought it through…just acted in anger.

  Had a similar degree of anger kept him away after he’d flown in to the Gold Coast to explain and attempt a reconciliation?

  She had vivid recall of the words she’d flung at him in accusation.

  ‘I tried so hard to believe you.’ Her voice sounded husky, almost desperate.

  ‘Not an easy ask, given Sierra’s deliberate machinations.’

  They’d come so far. Did she have the courage to take the next step and help bridge the gap?

  It would mean baring her soul. Vulnerable, when she’d shored up her shattered heart and papered over the cracks.

  Love was a four-letter word, but one of the hardest to say.

  Yet hadn’t she shown him with her body, with every touch, each caress…dammit, everything…how much he meant to her?

  It wasn’t merely intimacy, or just sex. Each time they made love it was lovemaking…the gift of body, heart, soul.

  Tell him, an inner voice prompted.

  Except she balked at voicing the words. For once she did the rest of her life, as she knew it, would change.

  And she’d already made a new life for herself. One to which she’d sworn to return. Was committed to return. How could she renege on arrangements already in place?

  Almost as if Raúl knew the passage of her thoughts, he cradled her head and closed his mouth over hers in a kiss that took hold of her heart and bound it to his own.

  When at last he lifted his head, he traced light fingers over her full lips and smiled slightly as they trembled beneath his touch.

  ‘You’re not going anywhere, mi hermosa.’

  She was willing to swear her heart tripped a beat. ‘What are you saying?’

  ‘I want you with me always. I believe it’s what you want, too.’

  Gianna wanted to give an unequivocal yes, for that was how she felt with her heart.

  ‘I love you. I don’t want to let you out of my sight. What ever you need to tie up in Australia can be done from here.’

  ‘I can’t do that,’ she said slowly. ‘There’s Bellissima…’

  ‘Which is operating successfully without you. Appoint Annaliese as permanent manager. Assign her a percentage of the profits as an enticement.’

  ‘My apartment…’

  ‘Lease it out.’

  ‘Jazz,’ she offered in a strangled voice, and saw his eyes darken. ‘My cat. He’s currently in a boarding cattery.’

  ‘We’ll arrange to fly him here.’

  Gianna sat upright. ‘Raúl…’ Whatever else she might have said trailed to a halt as she viewed him in silence. ‘What exactly are you proposing?’

  ‘Do you need to ask?’

  ‘Yes. Yes, I do.’

  ‘Our marriage resumed and reinstated. I want you with me every day, every night, for the rest of my life. As my wife. If Bellissima is so important to you, we’ll source out a suitable boutique here.’

  Stay? Remain here permanently? To be with him was what she wanted more than anything in the world…but she had obligations, responsibilities she needed to attend to, which meant a return to Australia.

  She had to think with her head.

  ‘A week. Just one week,’ Gianna pleaded. ‘I’ll contact Annaliese, call my lawyer, a leasing agent. Set everything in motion so it can be tied up as quickly as possible.’ She placed a hand over her heart. ‘I give you my word.’

  ‘All of which can be achieved from here.’

  ‘I have clothes, effects at the apartment I should take care of in person.’

  ‘I can arrange for the entire contents of your apartment to be transported here, for cleaners to ready it for leasing.’

  ‘Can’t you see?’ she begged. ‘I have to go back.’

  Her independence was something he admired. Together with her strength of purpose. Even in this instance, when it worked against him. If he could conceivably take a week and accompany her he would, but he had important meetings in Madrid all week, and in truth he was reluctant to be too far away from Teresa.

  A week. It wasn’t a lifetime. Capitulation at this point, given the big picture, their future together, wasn’t an issue. Even if he’d merely exist without her.

  ‘When do you want to leave?’

  What was the time? Gianna checked the bedside clock. ‘I can put a few calls through now. Follow them up with e-mails. I could probably take a flight within twenty-four hours.’

  ‘I’ll call my pilot and arrange to have the Lear jet on standby.’

  ‘You don’t need to do that.’

  His eyes pierced hers. ‘Yes, I do.’

  Any further protest she might have voiced became lost as he stood easily to his feet, discarded his robe, then her own, and drew her down onto the bed and into his arms.

  Telling Teresa of her plans wasn’t the easiest thing Gianna had to do, but Teresa listened, nodded her head in silent agreement, and offered sagely, ‘If you feel it’s something you must attend to personally, then, my dear, you should follow your instinct.’

  ‘A week. Then I’ll be back.’ She reached out and clasped Teresa’s hands within her own. ‘I give you my word.’

  ‘I know,’ she said gently. ‘Raúl has made the necessary arrangements for you?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘When do you leave?’

  ‘Late this afternoon.’

  ‘Will you walk with me in the garden?’

  ‘Of course.’

  They talked only of the flowers, and how Miguel planned new borders for the spring, how splendid the colours would be…different shades of pink, lilac, dispersed among the white blooms. The brilliant yellows, creams…the reds in all their glory.

  ‘I can visualise them now,’ Teresa said wistfully. ‘A glorious floral pathway. All my favourites.’ She paused to offer a light laugh. ‘I have so many.’

  ‘You love it here.’

  ‘Yes. My beloved husband brought me here not long after Raúl was born. He wanted to gift me something very special for the son we had made together. He thought this villa worthy of my attention,’ Teresa revealed. ‘I fell in love with it at first sight. The view was amazing, the interior perfect. It did need a little tender loving care, and that was given. I had carte blanche, and when it was finished we came here often. I designed the gardens, and now Miguel keeps them much the same. I am sure his hands itch at times to plan something different, but he never argues with me. Occasionally I feel inc
lined to surprise him, but that would mean change, and I prefer to keep things the way they were. It helps me remember the good times. The tree which Raúl loved to climb, until he fell and broke his arm. I wanted the tree cut down, but my husband insisted it should stand as a reminder.’ She lifted a hand and indicated the tree. ‘It beckons children, don’t you think?’

  Something caught in Gianna’s throat, and she swallowed it down. ‘Yes, it does.’ In fact, its branches seemed to curve inwards, almost in a protective embrace.

  ‘This place represents so much to me. Above all, it lends itself to peace. It’s where I want to be…among so many wonderful memories.’

  They had walked almost full circle, and as they reentered the villa Teresa drew her close in a gentle hug. Gianna extracted the gift she’d bought and placed it in Teresa’s hand.

  ‘For you, with my love.’

  ‘May I open it now?’

  ‘Please.’

  Teresa carefully undid the decorative bow, removed the ribbon, opened the jeweller’s box, and her eyes shone with pleasure. ‘Oh, my dear. It’s exquisite. I shall treasure it. Thank you.’ She lifted a hand and cradled Gianna’s cheek.

  ‘Soon you must ready yourself to leave. And I must rest. Travel carefully, my dear, and God speed. Above all, thank you for spending time with me.’

  Any second now she was going to cry. ‘I adore you.’ They were the only words she could summon, and Teresa smiled gently.

  ‘And I you.’

  Gianna made it to the staircase, then her eyes blurred as the tears welled.

  In an hour Miguel would drive her to the airport, where the Velez-Saldaña helicopter would transport her to Madrid, and then she’d board the Lear jet en route to the Gold Coast.

  She was doing the right thing—tying up loose ends, ensuring everything she’d worked for over the past three years was settled to her personal satisfaction.

  One week…what was one week in comparison to a lifetime?

  Gianna sent Raúl a text message just prior to climbing into the helicopter. Another in Madrid, during the taxi ride to Barajas Airport.

  It was as the driver entered the carriageway leading to the international terminal that doubt settled like a shroud and an inner voice cautioned, What the hell do you think you’re doing? Are you insane?

  She was almost there, for heaven’s sake. Any minute soon the taxi would pull into the departures terminal, the driver would remove her bag, she’d pay him and head inside.

  Except suddenly it seemed all wrong.

  The taxi slid into its allotted bay, and the driver killed the engine.

  OK, it was now or never. ‘I’m sorry, I’ve changed my mind. Please take me back to the city.’

  English, she could almost hear him think. Never know what they’re doing.

  ‘You are sure, señora?’

  She was never more sure of anything in her life.

  ‘Yes.’ She gave him the address of the Velez-Saldaña conglomerate’s headquarters, then sank back in her seat.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  WHAT if she was wrong?

  What if Raúl wasn’t working late at his city office? Oh, God, don’t think.

  This is what you want, she reiterated silently as the taxi slid to a halt outside the entrance foyer of the tall office building.

  ‘Wait…please,’ Gianna instructed as she slid from the taxi’s rear passenger seat and crossed to the security intercom system.

  Simply press the security buzzer, wait for video recognition to gain entry, then walk to the bank of elevators—one step after the other. How difficult could it be?

  Are you kidding?

  Except the memory of his touch, the way he kissed her…She momentarily closed her eyes at the vivid recall of their lovemaking. It was more than sexual coupling…so much more.

  Dammit, she uttered beneath her breath. What are you waiting for?

  Do it.

  For a long moment nothing happened, and despair swept through her body. She was about to turn back to the taxi when the security guard’s voice issued with polite warmth.

  ‘Señora, Señor Velez-Sandaña is currently at his apartment. You wish me to telephone ahead and relay you are on your way to see him?’

  ‘No.’ She nervously lifted a hand and tucked a stray tendril of hair behind one ear. ‘No,’ she reiterated. ‘I’d prefer to surprise him.’

  ‘Very well. Buenos noches.’

  Traffic at this time of the evening flowed fairly freely, and Gianna was aware of increasing tension with every passing kilometre that closed the distance to Raúl’s apartment complex.

  You can do this. The silent affirmation strengthened her resolve, and when the taxi drew to a halt in the sweeping forecourt she paid the driver, added a generous tip, collected her bag, then crossed to the building’s entrance.

  The doorman greeted her, ushered her in to the foyer, where she summoned an elevator and keyed in the appropriate floor when she entered it. She took a deep, calming breath as the electronic doors slid closed.

  Passage to the high floor was swift, and she crossed with measured steps to the solid double doors guarding entry to his luxury apartment.

  Don’t hesitate, a silent voice bade her. Simply press the door chimes… And wait.

  For an anxious moment she wondered if he was in…maybe he’d chosen to dine out.

  Then he was there, and he stood in the wide aperture, his dark hair rumpled as if he’d raked fingers through its length.

  Wearing black trousers and a loose-fitting white cotton shirt unbuttoned almost to his waist, he bore a faintly piratical air…solemn, almost brooding, as his eyes seared her own.

  ‘I didn’t take the flight.’ Nothing quite like stating the obvious, she decided with a measure of scepticism.

  Raúl inclined his head. ‘So the pilot told me. I’ve been raising hell trying to track down your movements.’

  Oh, dear, she hadn’t thought of that.

  ‘I intended to,’ she said with innate honesty.

  ‘What stopped you?’

  For a moment she just drank him in…the essence of who he was beneath the sophisticated façade…the man she loved beyond all else.

  One word, just one. ‘You.’

  ‘Leaving was your decision.’

  ‘The wrong one,’ she managed simply, and saw his eyes darken.

  For a moment she imagined he struggled with the power of speech.

  Except this was Raúl…someone who could fell a person with just a look, a powerful man never known to be lost for a word in any situation.

  He stood aside and gestured for her to enter…and she did, hearing the solid clunk as the double wooden doors slid shut, aware in her heart that there was no going back as she turned to face him.

  Her gaze was steady, her eyes luminous with the strength of her emotions. ‘I love you.’

  Raúl closed his eyes, then opened them, blazing obsidian and flagrantly emotive as he lifted a hand and brushed light fingers over the soft curve of her lower lip. ‘Gracias de Dios. I never thought to hear you say it again.’

  The warmth of his smile almost melted her heart.

  ‘I never stopped.’ Anything else she might have said remained unuttered as he pressed her mouth closed, then lowered his head and angled his mouth over her own in a teasing salutation she returned in kind.

  Together they indulged in a leisurely exploration, until the tasting wasn’t enough, and Raúl held her head captive as he increased the pressure, sweeping her mouth with his tongue as he circled it with his own in a mating dance that would have only one end.

  Unbidden, her hands slid beneath his shirt to explore the taut muscle and sinew covering his chest and ribs, before moving to push the gaping edges over his shoulders in an effort to dispense with the restriction as she sought one dark male nipple with her lips, alternately caressing and nibbling the pebbled nub with her tongue…and heard his faint groan as she rolled it between the edge of her teeth.

  With a sen
se of desperation she pulled his shirt free from his trousers and dispensed with it, revelling in the satin smoothness of his skin as she shaped him with her hands.

  ‘Too many clothes,’ she declared in a voice she barely recognised as her own, and heard his soft laughter as she reached for his belt, unfastened it, then worked the zip fastener free.

  He lowered his head and lightly nipped the vulnerable curve at the edge of her neck as he dispensed with her jacket and dealt with the buttons on her blouse.

  The bra came next, and she uttered a faint gasp as he lifted her high against him and eased her thighs around his waist, held her there with one arm while he captured her head with the other…and covered her mouth with his own in a kiss that reached right down to her soul.

  On some level she became aware of being carried, the almost silent click of a door closing, then he released her to stand before him.

  ‘I should never have left,’ Gianna said quietly, then fell silent by the sheer expediency of Raúl pressing a finger to her lips.

  ‘Later.’ His mouth curved into a warm smile, and his eyes…so dark and liquid with desire. She couldn’t think of a word to say. ‘Later we talk.’ He trailed light fingers over each cheek and traced the outline of her mouth. ‘For now, I have plans.’

  A faint bubble of laughter rose in her throat. ‘You do?’

  ‘Sí.’ He brought her close, moulding the length of her body against his own so there could be no doubt as to the strength of his arousal.

  She lifted her face to his, and her eyes held an impish light as she sought to tease. ‘Isn’t it a little early for bed?’

  ‘I don’t have sleeping in mind.’

  ‘Good.’ It was a matter of simple expediency to pull his head down to her own and take possession of his mouth. Although it soon became debatable who possessed who as the kiss became something else…hungry, increasingly urgent, intensely sexual.

  What remained of their clothes was rapidly discarded, and Raúl tore the covers from the large bed, then tumbled them both down onto the sheets.

  His powerful body loomed over her own as he braced his weight, then he sought the sensitive hollow at the base of her throat, savoured it, and traced a path across her collarbone before slipping to the soft swell of her breast, lingered there before gifting equal time to its twin.