Assassins Bite

by Mary Hughes

  Aiden explained. He wound down with “So they both looked at me—but what I heard was ‘This is a job for Ric’.”

  “Strangely, most of what I heard was ‘Sunny did this, Sunny did that’,” Ric said. “You really care for this girl?”

  “Not girl.” Aiden shook his head firmly. “A girl is someone you shelter and coddle—and make her decisions for her. You respect a woman. You stand beside a woman. Sunny is definitely a woman I respect.”

  Ric gave a weak laugh. “Finally. You bit the big one, asshole.”

  Aiden gave him the only answer he could—an extremely hairy eyeball. Too bad it wasn’t a video conference. “Look, will you help?”

  “Aiden, I would, but I can’t. I’m barely able to crawl out of the soil for a quick transfusion.”

  “Then who—”

  “You know who. You.”

  “I can’t—”

  “You can, because you have to.”

  “Shit. Why can’t you be the enabling sort of friend?”

  “I’ll call Rosie and Harry to prepare the Minneapolis-St. Paul troops. Why don’t you talk to Sunny? Maybe she can help you find your inner leader.”

  I had a headache. Not just from the three premium boilermakers I’d drunk. Yes, I’d had another. Elena had found the bridal edition of Sass-Cgal and Mom was poring over dresses with Madison, who had somehow become my wedding consultant.

  Mom was trying to talk me into a bustle and Madison had almost won me over to the off-the-shoulder number when Aiden thankfully intervened. He settled Mom’s tab and guided us both out the door, headed home. After I helped Mom to bed, Aiden gathered me for a snuggle on the couch. I was hoping for more, but when I started to kiss his chest he burst out with, “How can I lead them? I’ve been the next best thing to alone for centuries.”

  Nookie went on immediate hold. I put supportive arms around him. “But you were Young Chief and First Friend as a child. You were a leader then.”

  “That part of me died.”

  “Are you sure?” I put a hand on his heart. “Maybe it’s just walled off.”

  He gently lifted my hand and kissed it. “Then it’s blind and stunted. Pulling together the Mars-Venus faction? That’ll take a master at the top of his game.”

  Obviously this would take a different approach. I straightened so I could watch his face. “So what are you good at?”

  He shrugged. “Fighting. Spying.”

  “Hmm.” I pretended to consider it. “I’ve seen your hand-to-hand and knife technique, but is that all you know? Can you use modern weapons, like guns?”

  He raised a black brow. “You’re up to something. All right, I’ll play. I’ve studied modern weapons, hand and range. Psychology too. Know your opponent and you can never lose.”

  “Know yourself and you will always win. Sun Tzu.” I grimaced. So he was onto me. Didn’t mean it wouldn’t still work. “You know battle tactics too?”

  “Yes, of course. And strategy…damn it, Ruffles, you’ve gotten under my guard again.” He’d seen where I was going. His gaze narrowed at me. “Sure, I can plan battles, move troops. Doesn’t mean I can command them. I’m no general.”

  “I’d be there for you.” I wrapped arms around his waist, laid my head on his chest and deliberately relaxed. In sympathy, he relaxed marginally too.

  “Even if I do it…” He sighed and wrapped arms around me in return. “Where do I gather the troops? We don’t know where Nosferatu will attack.”

  I was silent a moment, considering what to say. I’d thought of a plan, but I wasn’t sure if it was solid or simply the alcohol talking. “I have an idea.”

  “I won’t like this, will I?” When I didn’t respond, his arms tightened. “It’s dangerous?”

  “Not so dangerous, if you’re there.”

  “I’m going to need fortification for this.” He released me and stood.

  I followed him into the kitchen, where he ran our tea kettle under the tap.

  As it filled, he shook his head. “Something must be wrong with me. I’m not even going to try to argue you out of it. I’m just going to listen and do what you need me to do.”

  I warmed with gratitude. “Thanks.” I dragged a chair to the cupboard, mounted it and got down two mugs, a canister of loose tea and a French press. As I scooped tea into the press, he set the kettle on the burner.

  Then he turned, arms crossed, his expression a strange mix of gloomy and proud. “All right, tell me. How do you know where Nosferatu will come?”

  “We’ll make him choose it. Linesville, a small town off the main roads, is midway between Milwaukee and Madison straddling the Wisconsin-Illinois border.”

  “East Nowhere? I’m really not going to like this. How will you make him pick Linesville?”

  The kettle whistled and I grinned again. He was right—he wasn’t going to like it. So it was in my best interests to let him stew on the worst. That way, reality would seem easy by comparison. “Hold that thought.” I carefully poured water into the press.

  He watched me, face mournful. “You’re stalling. It’s worse than I thought.”

  “Maybe.” My heart pounded as I brought the press to the table. He followed with the mugs. We sat and I briefly touched his hand for reassurance. “Maybe not. First, a question. Dawn Truck Lines is a v-guy business, right?”

  “Not exclusively. But with the hours, my kind finds it convenient to work there and to use it as a cover.” He pulled the press to himself and slowly depressed the plunger.

  “Is it Alliance or Coterie or something else?”

  “It’s an interstate hauler, so it’s neutral. It has to be…” The plunger stopped. His eyes flashed up to me. “You want to meet Eloise at DTL.”

  Damn, he was quick. “Yes. I tell her I can find you and ask her to meet with me on neutral ground. We capture her, take her to Linesville and use her as bait for Nosferatu.”

  “That might actually work.” He pushed the plunger the rest of the way. “I’ll agree—with one change. I’m the bait. I’ll tell her I’ve changed my mind, that I’ll fight Nosferatu for her.”

  “She won’t believe it.”

  “She doesn’t have to believe it. She’ll still take the bait.”

  I thought it over as he poured tea for both of us. “I don’t like it.”

  “Let’s agree to disagree. Tell me this. How do we capture her? She’ll bring her lackeys.”

  I added sugar to my tea and stirred. “That’s why we do this at the terminal. We won’t be alone either, not if we meet her in the back lot.”

  “Where the extra trucks are parked?” His eyes glinted. “With the diesel fumes she won’t smell a thing.”

  “Exactly. Your trucker friends can hide inside the trailers and ambush her lackeys while we cuff her.”

  He shook his head. “She’ll be expecting antivamp cuffs.”

  “Which is why I should be the bait. I can distract her while you cuff her.” I sipped and burned my tongue. “Yowch.” I wagged my tongue in the air, trying to cool it.

  Aiden stood, grabbed the back of my head, and kissed me deep, his tongue rasping over mine. I imagined it on my…well, everything.

  When he released me, my tongue was no longer burnt, but it was buzzing.

  He whispered into my ear, “You are not getting anywhere near her.”

  Delicious goose bumps ruffled my skin. Her, who…? Oh, Eloise. “What if I got some of Elena’s ranged goodies?”

  “Well—”

  “Great.” Before he could object, I got out my phone. My tea needed to cool anyway. And my body, from that kiss.

  Elena answered, out of breath from sparring—or other physical exertion, but to keep from jabbing pencils into my ears, I assumed she was sparring. I explained what I wanted.

  She said, “I can loan you some of the smaller items,
a jacked-up stun gun called a Viper, and an RFP—that’s a rapid-fire pistol, with silver-jacketed bullets. You’ll have to buy your own SMAW, though.”

  I thought of the silver stake. “But silver doesn’t kill v-guys.”

  “Silver doesn’t kill them, but they can’t insta-heal it. Plus, these bullets are explosive. The shrapnel cuts deep tissue and is painful as hell. Slows ’em way down.”

  “Perfect.” I didn’t want to destroy Eloise, just capture her. “Can I pick everything up now?”

  A pause, punctuated by off-mic kisses. “Um, now’s not a good time. How about you get them when you visit Dirk? Bo, stop that.” Then she giggled.

  “Yup, good.” Eardrums, meet pointy graphite. I thumbed off. “Elena has a v-guy stunner. I can zap Eloise with it and you can slap on the cuffs.”

  “Change that to me doing both zapping and cuffing, and we have a plan.” He held out his mug.

  I clinked mugs with him. We drank.

  “I’ll text Eloise.” Aiden set down his tea and flicked thumbs over his phone. “She may not be recovered yet, but this will raise her from the grave.” He gave me a full-on grin, sparkling white teeth between thin sexy lips. I could see the boy he’d been before Nosferatu twisted him. I smiled back.

  His smile altered subtly. Without a word we both abandoned our tea to go upstairs to my bedroom.

  He spent the day with me. We did some sleeping. Mom walked past my locked door a couple times humming “Here Comes the Bride.” Mom has never been on best terms with Miss Subtle but in her defense, she believes anything worth doing is worth doing well, including annoying your progeny.

  The next evening was my scheduled night off from work. We paid a short visit to my brother, who was speaking better, collected Elena’s goodies then walked to Dawn Truck Lines.

  On the way I coached Aiden to ask for the truckers’ help. “Remember, you have common ground. You and Ric are fighting for your freedom. These guys are all about independence. Easy.”

  He shook his head. “It’d be easier if they were my friends like you and Ric.”

  I was the solitary assassin’s friend. “Thanks. You’ve made friends here too.”

  “Aided by several six-packs, but yes. Probably.”

  On the front steps I faced him. “You can do this. I believe in you. Ric believes in you. They will too.”

  His black eyes searched mine. I let him read my serene confidence. “You’ll back me?”

  “Of course.”

  He drew a breath and I saw a fire light inside him. “All right. Let’s do this.”

  He entered the terminal, not with his silent ninja glide, not with his deadly filtering, but with a confident, open stride that I’d never seen before. He laid out his plan and needs with honest simplicity.

  They all were happy to help.

  As they left to take their positions, I put a hand on Aiden’s arm. “I knew you could do it, but that was amazing.”

  “Thanks. Having you here made all the difference.”

  I holed up safe with the truckers in one of the trailers. Aiden lounged nearby.

  Unfortunately, all the good vibes in the world don’t mean jack when Murphy wants to play. Eloise didn’t come.

  Just before dawn, Aiden and I walked to Strongwells’. Aiden shook his head. “She probably hasn’t recovered from the bazooka yet. We’ll try again tonight.”

  But I knew what that shake of the head meant. Time was running out. Nosferatu would be on Ric’s doorstep sooner rather than later. I put a hand on Aiden’s biceps, rock-hard with tension. “She’ll come tonight. I’ll take off work—”

  “No.” He kissed me. “I have the Viper and the cuffs. I’ll actually feel better knowing you’re safe.”

  As I left him there to donate more blood to Ric, I could tell he was discouraged. But short of exploding a bomb under Eloise, I didn’t see how we could get her to move any faster.

  I found that bomb in a most unusual place.

  I went home to try to get some sleep. Neither of us would get any rest if he stayed with me, so we’d agreed that until this was over he’d stay at Strongwells and I’d sleep at home. Hopefully it wasn’t really my mom’s “Matrimony or Die” vibes scaring him off.

  I didn’t sleep well that day. Only three times with Aiden, yet being alone felt wrong.

  That night I went to work, but I was on tenterhooks the entire time. By dawn I was a wreck, so when Aiden texted me, “No joy,” it was both a disappointment and a relief. Now we’d have to do it all over again.

  That morning I hoped I’d miss him less, but actually it was worse. I lay in the bed I’d slept in for years—and tossed and turned for five unproductive hours.

  I got up. Yawning, I checked out the window for the weather.

  A hatchback was parked directly across the street.

  I chilled, abruptly awake.

  The car pulled away from the curb. I followed its progress down the street, until it turned the corner.

  I shook myself. Why was I worried? That wasn’t a dark sedan, and neither Thuggoh nor redhead guy nor brunette gal were inside. I shrugged it off and headed for the shower.

  Where I fell asleep, and fell asleep again getting dressed. Yawning, I opened a police methods book to study and fell asleep over that. I woke when I smelled food.

  Mom was busy making Easter cheese balls shaped like bunnies and lambs. “I have packed you a delicious lunch to take to work, Sunny. It’s in the refrigerator.”

  “Thanks, Mom. By the way, I think Dirk will be home soon.”

  “That’s good. I’ll get started on that batch of his favorite gummy worms. Using real—”

  “O-kay.” I waved her off. At this rate, I’d never eat again. “Glad I could help.”

  It was six and my shift didn’t start until nine, but I wanted to visit the truck terminal to make sure everything was set, so I grabbed my lunch and left.

  On the way to DTL, I got a strange urge to stop at Dolly Barton’s Curl Up and Dye.

  A Ruffles’ gut instinct—run! But Aiden had called me lucky. He hadn’t changed my mind about that, but he had changed my hopes. Anyway, what the hell. It was just a beauty parlor. How bad could it be, I’d get moussed to death? I detoured.

  Dolly’s salon was in the Scenic Shopping district, a block north of the Caffeine Café and the Fudgy Delight. I pushed inside. A small bell tinkled, announcing my arrival.

  To say Dolly was the town gossip was like saying you only have to pay taxes in years with a number in them. Dolly knew everything that went on, sometimes even before it happened. She made the NSA look like a bunch of kids with tin cans and string.

  “Hey, sugar.” Dolly called everyone sugar. She was a seventy-year-old platinum-blonde dynamo, four foot eight—hey, three people shorter than me—forty-two D, exactly like the country singer except older and shorter. Like a Dolly Parton Mini-Me. She wore pink fifties diner-style uniforms and chewed a wad of gum as big as your head. “I’m glad you stopped by. A slot opened up after your appointment next week. Want something besides your usual cut? I could do a mani-pedi or bikini wax.”

  “No…well, maybe the wax.” I wondered if Aiden would like me partly cloudy or full Sunny.

  “Maybe a fresh hairstyle?”

  That was a no-brainer. I opened my mouth to say absolutely not. I’d had the bowl cut since childhood, since kindergarten…my God.

  I’d had this cut since Dirk was hurt.

  But Dirk was a new man…er, vampire now. Even Aiden was starting to change, to reveal an open, confident leader.

  Why not a new Sunny? Better yet, why not tonight?

  A shaft of scared skewered me. Why not? Because I’d had this haircut forever.

  But I’d also been single forever. An unlucky Ruffles forever.

  Damn it, I wanted different. It might be worse—but I’d
deal, just as I had with my brother’s change, just as I had with Aiden’s past. “Actually, that sounds good—if you can do it now.”

  She smiled. “Have a seat. I have to finish up your aunt’s perm.”

  In her chair was my Aunt Matilde, aka Mrs. Police Chief. As Dolly started pulling curlers, pads of steel wool sprung up. I won’t say Auntie’s hair was frizzy, but she and Uncle John had been married so long, it seemed twins of his mutton chops had crawled onto her head.

  Auntie waved in the mirror. “Hello, Sun-Hee. Did you hear I’m getting new wallpaper?”

  “Nice. Did you go with the Edward Gorey pastiche or Kinkade/Rubens mash-up?”

  “An Anne Bel Geddes montage.”

  “Oh, is that the artist who poses babies?”

  “Like her, but using octogenarians.”

  “Um.”

  Dolly dried and styled. Aunt Matilde gave her a two-dollar tip and traipsed out. Dolly tucked it away in her cash register. “Okay, sugar. You’re up.”

  This was it. Renewed doubts bubbled in my stomach. I lowered myself into the chair. “I’m not so sure—”

  “Trust me. You’ll love it.” Dolly spun me away from the mirror. Her shears flew, a crisp rhythmic snip-snip. Black hair floated to the floor. I winced with every hunk. Too late I remembered Dolly’s sense of style was formed when bouffants were in.

  “Voila!” She spun me back.

  My shiny black bob had become a fringed elfin cap, a marvel that framed my face, made my eyes huge and gave me actual cheekbones. “Wow. I’m…pretty.”

  “Ha. This’ll make your hunky boyfriend’s eyes fall out.”

  “He’s not…aw heck. Okay. How much?”

  “On the house, sugar. I’ve been dying to give you an adult cut for years.” She swirled off the cape. “You’re going to see him now, right? Win him away from his ex?”

  “He doesn’t have an ex.”

  “Small, dark and insane?” She snapped gum.

  “Eloise isn’t Aiden’s ex…” Good grief, Dolly was right. I don’t know how she knew about Eloise, or her past with Aiden…same way she knew everything, I suppose…but the evidence was there. Eloise’s attack on him with handcuffs and phallic silver stake shouted sexual repression. She hated him—which meant she’d loved him first. Hate doesn’t grow from indifference.