Now & Forever 2 - The book of Danny

by Joachim Jean

  At two o’clock Danny showed up at Mac and Callie’s house. Callie’s eyes watered when she saw how bad he looked. Scared to death he had closed off his relationship with Eliza forever, Danny’s spirits sagged.

  “Are you sick, Uncle Danny?” Jason asked.

  “Maybe a little bit sad today.”

  “Why?”

  “I’m a little lonely. Here with you, I feel better. What did Santa bring you this year?” Danny switched the subject.

  He gave presents to both kids and spent two hours playing with them. Still, Callie’s expression didn’t lighten when she looked at him.

  “Are you eating? You look thin and pale. Have you seen Eliza? Are you okay?”

  “I’m okay…surviving.”

  “Dan, you’ve looked better,” Mac agreed with Callie.

  “Et tú, Bruté?”

  Callie hung lots of mistletoe around the house. She and Mac had a contest to see who could spot the other one under mistletoe and plant a kiss first. Then Jason got in the act and before long, many kisses were exchanged, even with Kitty, who ran around kissing everyone she saw. Then the doorbell rang. Eliza, Kaitlyn and Sally, dropped in, bringing bits of snow and chill winds though the front door along with brightly wrapped gifts.

  Danny smiled at Eliza, though she didn’t smile back at him. He did get a big greeting from Kaitlyn and Sally with hugs from both girls. Danny took advantage of the situation to take Eliza in his arms and hug her. She didn’t resist his warm hug and softened slightly. All the adults watched them. Danny wanted to kiss her, but resisted, feeling a coolness from her.

  “Where’s your new girlfriend?” Eliza asked.

  “She’s not my new girlfriend. Just an acquaintance,” he said, quietly.

  “You usually sleep with acquaintances?”

  “I’m so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you for a minute, not for a second. I still love you Eliza and only you,” he said, taking her hand, and then looked up and saw the little green and red plant hanging from the ceiling. So he took a chance and pointed up. “Mistletoe,” he said, taking her in his arms and kissing her. Within a few seconds, her resistance melted and a simple kiss became passionate as he cupped her head, holding her lips to his while his tongue explored her mouth.

  “Is that how you kiss a girl under the mistletoe, Daddy? Like Uncle Danny?” Jason asked.

  Danny became embarrassed, he and Eliza moved back from their kiss. She quickly retreated into the kitchen and he went to the window. He made his excuses and left soon after their kiss. At the end of their driveway, he stopped and before getting in his car, he looked back at the house and saw Eliza. She stood at the window, watching him. He raised his hand in farewell to her and she lifted her hand in return.

  * * * *

  To raise their sagging spirits after the Christmas excitement wore off, with no reconciliation between Eliza and Danny, Mac and Callie got a babysitter and went dancing. They invited Danny to go to the Coconut Tree Lounge with them. Callie coaxed him out, despite his being snowed under with work and depressed.

  The small band started with a swing number which got Danny and Callie on the dance floor. Like old times when they were teenagers, they were in tune with each other, and danced seamlessly. Mac smiled as he watched Danny swing Callie and move with grace and speed. They danced three numbers before coming back to have a drink.

  “Pretty good,” Mac conceded, nodding.

  “Pretty good! I’ll have you know Danny and I won several dance contests back in Mount Vernon.”

  “Swing was our favorite. We’re a little rusty, but with some practice, Callie, we could be contenders again.”

  While the band took a break, Mac sat back and looked around. He saw Eliza walk through the door with Sandy Benson, who owned several tire shops in WillowFalls and neighboring towns.

  “We should drink up and go,” Mac said, indicating to Callie to look over to where Eliza sat.

  “What’s the matter with you?” Callie looked around.

  Too late, Danny saw Eliza walk in with Sandy, but she had not seen him. He knew Sandy from Kiwanis. Word traveled fast. There was talk among Danny’s buddies that if Danny hadn’t moved in on Eliza when he had, Sandy would have. There was a rumor Danny heard at one of the poker games that Sandy would soon be dating Eliza steadily.

  “What is Eliza doing with Sandy?” Callie sniffed.

  “He doesn’t seem her style,” Mac agreed.

  Danny felt his blood pressure rise watching them together. He knew Sandy only slightly and didn’t like what he knew.

  Sixties music played at the Lounge and the band played Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head, Georgy Girl and Ramblin’ Rose. Danny sat the songs out, keeping an eye on Eliza dancing with Sandy. He couldn’t stand to see Sandy put his arm around her and hold her close, too close for his liking. Danny knew Sandy’s mind was going straight to the bedroom and it made his blood boil. Jealousy rose in his throat so strong he could barely choke it down. Though he didn’t think Eliza would sleep with Sandy, just the idea of him trying to seduce her made Danny want to break Sandy in half.

  Then they played Can’t Help Falling in Love with You and Danny went over and asked Eliza to dance. She turned to face him, a look of surprise on her face. Sandy frowned, but Eliza got up to dance with Danny anyway. He put his arms around her and drew her in close; she moved with him, effortlessly. Danny guided her expertly around the dance floor. The scent of her gardenia perfume brought back many happy memories for him. Danny closed his eyes and for a few moments he forgot they were not together anymore and murmured, “Sweetpea” in her ear.

  His frown turning into a stormy expression with color creeping into his cheeks, Sandy watched them from his table. When the dance finished, Danny returned her to her table and kissed her hand. Sandy got up to leave and though Eliza obviously wanted to stay, she followed him out the door.

  When he got back to Callie and Mac’s table and sat down, he noticed right away both Eliza and Sandy were gone. He shifted his gaze to the parking lot, saw them there exchanging words and got up. Before he reached the parking lot, a hand landed on his shoulder stopping him. It was Mac.

  “Don’t do anything stupid, Danny.”

  “I won’t. I want to hear how he talks to her. Make sure she’s safe.”

  “Don’t mind if I stay with you do you?”

  Danny grinned at Mac.

  “My new big brother. Stay if you want.”

  Danny inched closer and put his finger to his lips as Mac was about to speak. In the parking lot, Sandy turned on Eliza.

  “What’s going on with you, Eliza?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “With Maine.”

  “We danced one dance, Sandy. Big deal,” she said.

  “That wasn’t a dance…try more like a slow screw on the dance floor. Why are you out with me if you still want to sleep with him?”

  “That’s pretty crude. Just a dance.”

  “Just a dance? You’re nuts. Are you gonna dance like that with me?”

  “Didn’t we do a slow dance?”

  “Not with my hands all over you, like Maine. Should I do that to you now?”

  “What’s wrong with you?”

  “You’re still in love with him. Go screw him already. You don’t want to be with me, you want to be with him.”

  “I’m here with you, aren’t I?”

  “You only look like you are. You gonna give me a goodnight kiss? You gonna screw me tonight? I don’t think so. Get a ride home from him.” Sandy got in his car and drove away, leaving her standing in the parking lot.

  Eliza, too embarrassed to go back inside, stood outside with tears in her eyes. Danny motioned Mac to go back inside before he joined Eliza in the parking lot. Mac returned to Callie.

  “What happened?” Danny asked her.

  “I got dumped,” she said, color rising in her cheeks.

  “That idiot left you here?”

  She nodded, looking away from him.


  “What did he say?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll call a cab,” she said, turning away from him.

  “Tell me what he said, Eliza,” Danny insisted, holding her by the arm.

  “He said he didn’t want to be out with a woman who was so obviously in love with another man.”

  “So he thinks you’re still in love with me…are you?”

  “You know the answer.” She turned her face away from him.

  “I don’t…that’s why I’m asking.” He tightened his grip.

  “You’re embarrassing me, Danny…and hurting me.”

  “Okay. I give up. Sandy counted on getting something from you later tonight and realized he wasn’t getting any. That’s why he left.” He released her arm.

  “He wasn’t going to get anything from me.” She sniffed, rubbing the spot he'd grabbed.

  “Why don’t you join us? You’d make Mac and Callie happy.”

  “And what about you?” Her lip trembled.

  “I’d be overjoyed,” he whispered pulling her close to him and kissing her.

  She pulled away. “Please don’t. You kiss me and it messes me up. I think you still want me, and then I see you’re sleeping with someone else and I get confused. I don’t know what to think or feel anymore.” Her eyes were bright with tears.

  “I still want you. I’m not sleeping with anyone else.”

  Danny took her hand and led her back inside. She sat at his table and had a drink. Danny tried not to touch her as he felt her pull away from him, but he did put his arm around her and she didn’t object. They danced all the slow dances, Danny’s excuse for holding her close.

  Callie and Mac dropped Eliza at her house and Danny at his. Goodbyes were awkward, tense with Danny swallowing words he wanted to say.

  He took the dogs out and walked down to Eliza’s house, but the curtains were shut and the lights were off. She had been out with another man and reluctant to kiss him, perhaps she had moved on already. Danny felt sad. What had he done? He had ruined the best thing in his life and why? To stubbornly insist on having his own way and maybe it was too late to start over.

  * * * *

  Dr. Weiss spoke frankly to Danny at his next session. “What’s up with you? You’re still mooning over Eliza, not keeping up your journal, and you’ve pushed your Iraq experiences into the background so your nightmares are coming back. What’s going on?”

  “I don’t know,” he said, staring at the floor.

  “Stop behaving like a lovesick puppy, stop drinking too much and take charge of your life. Here, I found this on the bulletin board in the cafeteria. The university is starting a writer-in-residence program. You have to submit a hundred pages...”

  “Let me see,” Danny said, taking the flyer.

  “This program would be perfect for you…it pays a decent stipend. Turn your journal into a memoir about Iraq, write about Kyle, too and you’d have time to start your Ph. D. I suppose you could work the literary magazine in there somewhere, too.”

  “Sounds like a lot of work.”

  “And training to become a marksman didn’t require work? Come on, Danny. What are you afraid of, success? Put yourself out there. You’ve got a lot going for you. You’ve got three weeks to get a hundred pages of your journal into shape to submit. Start now. Your weekends are free, so spend them writing instead of mooning around. What have you got to lose?”

  Danny agreed with Pat, besides his life was in the toilet now anyway. He left her office with the flyer and his thoughts turned away from Eliza and on to something new. When he got home, he took out his journal and mapped out a plan, and then he created a schedule.

  In the office, he enlisted David Cohen’s help with his journal. David agreed to read his work and give Danny feedback. When no students showed up, Danny worked on his hundred pages with David there, helping him edit.

  Danny had been working out at the gym, but he ran into Eliza there a couple of times which created an awkward situation. He decided to keep in shape by running in the neighborhood instead. He took Blue with him for company. Of course he ran by Eliza’s house, hoping to see her. Sometimes he’d spy her by her kitchen window. He stopped to wave and she waved back, but that’s all.

  * * * *

  Eliza spent more and more time at the office. At night she’d have a drink at her desk and try to figure out her life. She’d been so happy before Thanksgiving and now her life was tied in knots, knots she couldn’t seem to undo. She stopped dating, realizing after one date with Sandy Benson he spoke the truth, she still loved Danny. So she stayed home, read, watched movies and wandered around her empty house feeling miserable. One night Jonesy stayed late, too.

  “Bill is going to that stupid Kiwanis poker game tonight, so I’ll stay and help you Eliza, if you don’t mind.”

  “I’d love the company. I’m too tired to do much. Let’s have a drink.”

  Eliza pulled out a bottle of vodka and some juice from the refrigerator and the ladies sat down on the sofa in her office. One drink led to another. The alcohol loosened Jonesy’s tongue.

  “If I speak frankly, it comes from my heart. What the hell are you doing? Why did you blow Danny off?”

  “I don’t want to get married. I don’t want to have another child and stay home. I don’t want to sell my house and start over again in another house. I don’t want to take any chances of getting hurt.”

  “Seems to me like you took the biggest chance there is, lost, and now you’re so hurt you can hardly get out of bed.”

  Eliza sat staring silently at her drink.

  “What did he say?” Jonesy persisted.

  “Marriage or nothing. So now we have nothing.” Tears formed in Eliza’s eyes.

  “Why would someone as smart as you do something so dumb, if you’ll pardon my bluntness? You love him, don’t you?”

  “But I wish I didn’t.”

  “Well, girl, you’ve got to compromise. There’s no love anywhere in this world without compromise.”

  “These life decisions are too big.”

  “First off, about selling the house. Can’t you just redecorate? If you got rid of the furniture and got new stuff, the place would look new, right?”

  “I suppose so.”

  “As for a baby, I know he can’t give birth, but can’t you two tag team, you take the kid when he’s teaching and he takes the child when you’re here?”

  “Maybe.”

  “You two supposedly love each other but you can’t figure out how to be together?”

  “We haven’t tried, I’m embarrassed to admit.”

  “You mean you turned him down flat?”

  Eliza nodded.

  “Shame on you! You killed his pride. How can he talk about compromise when you shot him down?”

  Yes, I shot him down, quickly and mercilessly. “You have a point.”

  “There’s a lot of water under the bridge now. A lot of repairing to do. Not sure the relationship can be fixed. Depends on how committed you two are.”

  “Don’t use that word… the word I used with Danny. ‘I don’t want to be committed,’ why did I say that?”

  “You were scared. When your husband dies so young…a tough break. You’re already committed emotionally, in your heart. What’s a little external commitment when you already have the internal?”

  Eliza burst into tears. “Oh, Jonesy, what am I going to do? Danny’s already slept with another woman and I’m afraid he’s going to find someone else. ”

  “He’s a fast worker. He’s not dating now, is he?”

  “I don’t think so. I saw him at The Coconut Tree, but Callie and Mac brought him there. He didn’t have a date.”

  “Ask Callie. If he’s not dating then he’s probably stuck in the same mess you’re in and there’s still hope.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  About midnight on a Friday night. Danny worked on his journal by the fire in his living room. He sat on the sofa with Rocky curled up next to him, his
head on Danny’s leg. Blue slept in her favorite spot by the fire.

  Danny had his robe over his boxers and tee shirt. The doorbell rang. Both dogs jumped up and went to the door, barking. Danny looked out through the peephole first. He saw his mother standing there, alone. He opened the door.

  “Hi, Danny.” She fidgeted with her sleeve, then looked down.

  He stepped outside and closed the door before the dogs could sneak out of the house. They barked in complaint on the other side.

  “What do you want?” he asked coldly, his hand on the gun in his robe pocket.

  His father stepped out from the shadows with a gun raised and aimed at Danny’s head. He got the drop on Danny, who cursed his own slowness.

  “Hi, son.” His father waved the gun at Danny.

  “What do you want?”

  “Get down on your knees. Edna, get the gun in his pocket. He’s got his hand on it,” Irvin ordered, staring at the bulge in the pocket of Danny’s robe.

  She stepped over to him and pulled the gun out of his hand, but she didn’t hand the weapon over to Irvin. Danny kept his hand in his pocket, wrapped around his cell phone.

  “Give it to me,” he commanded, his little piggy eyes flashing.

  “I’ll hang on to the gun.”

  “The hell you will. Give me that gun,” Irvin spat at her.

  “Go on. Say what we came here to say.” Her hand tightened on the gun handle.

  “We need money and a place to hide. The police are looking for us.”

  “That’s your problem. I don’t have any money to give you and you can’t stay here. I’m not jeopardizing my life by hiding you from the police. Besides, the dogs would tear you apart.”

  “That little, fat, funny thing? Yeah, right!”

  “Don’t underestimate Rocky. He could take a nasty bite out of you and Blue is big enough to do real damage. You can’t stay here.”

  “Let us in or I’ll tell the police you shot Fred.”

  “You don’t have any proof, or you’d have already gone to the police looking for a deal. You’re a bag of hot air.”