by Dani Wade
For the clothes to be askew? He’d been upset about something.
Back in the living room, she snatched up her purse as best she could with Carter in her arms and dug out her cell phone. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw a missed call, but it was just a girlfriend. A few swipes and she’d dialed Jacob. While she waited for him to answer, she jiggled Carter, who was starting to snuffle against her shirt—his precursor to demanding food.
Voice mail. Dang it. Should she leave a message? Call again? Carter started to wiggle, so she simply hung up and set the phone down so she could pat his back. “Okay, buddy,” she said. “Let’s get you some dinner, then we can track down Daddy.”
Only, the longer she waited, the more time she had to think. About what could be wrong. About why he hadn’t called. About where he was right now.
She and Carter had been settled in the chair with a bottle for about ten minutes when the doorbell rang. The baby startled, his eyes glancing toward the door, before returning to his dinner.
Jacob?
Of course not. Jacob had a key. Juggling the baby and bottle, KC went to the door and answered it. “Christina, thank goodness.”
Christina might at least have some answers. Except Christina’s tear-streaked face didn’t do KC’s sense of panic any good.
“Where’s Jacob? What’s wrong?”
“He and Aiden left midafternoon to go to North Carolina,” Christina said as she came through the door and dripped on the carpet. KC was alarmed to see her friend didn’t even have a raincoat or umbrella. “It’s Luke. He had a car accident during a practice round.” She glanced around as if unsure where she was or how she’d gotten here, turning almost in a circle before plopping onto the couch and letting her head fall into her hands. “I haven’t heard an update since they got to the medical center in Charlotte, but his crew chief says it’s pretty bad.”
“Why didn’t Jacob call and tell me?” I’m simply a phone call away. Is that too hard?
Christina was already shaking her head. “I’m sorry, KC. He was in total twin mode. That’s why I figured I should come over here and tell you in person.”
Twin mode. Oddly enough, she knew just what Christina meant. Jacob and Luke talked at least every other evening on the phone—and that was just what she saw here at home. She suspected they talked during the day, too. Or his phone would ring and Jacob would say, “That’s Lucas,” without even looking at the screen.
He had a connection to his brother she couldn’t understand but did recognize. Had he thought she wouldn’t?
Did that connection mean there wasn’t room for her? Leaving town without even a simple text screamed she wasn’t important enough to be told. She was simply a convenience, an obligation that came with his son.
In that moment, she knew she didn’t want to be. She ached to mean enough to him to warrant that phone call. To be truly needed. To be worthy of him sticking around—for her, not just for Carter.
Silence settled in the room as KC finished feeding Carter his bottle. The force of the wind spraying the rain against the windows added to KC’s uneasiness.
Christina didn’t seem to mind the silence. She simply sat there, probably not wanting to be alone. KC couldn’t blame her.
Then the phone rang. From the ringtone, KC realized it was Christina’s.
“Aiden,” Christina said, relief raising her voice.
KC watched her as she settled Carter in his bouncy seat so he could kick his legs and reach for the little toys attached to it now that his tummy was full and he was happy.
Christina nodded several times as Aiden spoke, then closed her eyes in what looked like a painful squeeze. “Oh, Aiden,” she breathed.
KC’s heart pounded. Please, let Luke be okay.
Christina turned teary eyes in her direction and nodded. “Yes, I’m at her place now. Okay,” she said, leaving KC frustrated with the one-sided conversation. If Aiden could talk to his wife, surely Jacob could call her, too.
Christina said her touching goodbyes to her husband and hung up without any word about KC. Obviously, Jacob hadn’t asked for her.
“Aiden said the doctors are talking about more surgery tomorrow. He’s gonna be okay eventually. But his legs are in pretty bad shape.” Christina hugged herself and rocked a little. KC took a seat next to her and rubbed her back. Christina had always been friends with Luke. KC tried to remember that and how much her friend needed someone to comfort her with her husband a couple hundred miles away.
Not how that loathsome feeling of abandonment was once again spreading through her own mind and heart.
“But he’s out of danger now?” KC asked quietly.
Christina nodded, a tear slipping down her cheek. Then Carter blew a raspberry and the women laughed, breaking the tension.
“Come on,” KC said as she stood. “Let’s fix some dinner.”
They were halfway through eating before KC trusted herself to ask without sounding needy, “Are they all okay?”
“They made it across the state line just before the storm hit, which worried me, since they were driving Aiden’s car,” Christina said. Then her eyes met KC’s and the realization of what KC was asking dawned. “The doctors let Jacob stay in recovery with Lucas, but Aiden said he’s hanging in there.”
But Jacob couldn’t step outside to update her personally? Even for a few minutes?
No. She wouldn’t think like that. She simply nodded and moved on.
Not long after dinner, the local television station broke off programming for the announcement of Luke’s accident.
KC wanted to ignore it, but she couldn’t look away. Aiden and Jacob stood together behind a podium, forming a united front in stylish suits. But Jacob did the talking.
Across the bottom of the screen scrolled the words Local Celebrity Car Racer Severely Injured in Practice Accident. KC shivered as Jacob greeted the crowds of reporters. In their small-town life, it was easy to forget that all the Blackstone brothers had made names for themselves away from here.
“Good evening. I’m Jacob Blackstone.” His calm, cultured voice washed over her, ramping up her need to be with him. Beside him. “Thank you for joining us today. Our family is deeply grateful for your concern over our brother, Luke ‘Renegade’ Blackstone.”
She caught a barely perceptible shift from one foot to the other as Jacob paused. His face, usually a calm mask, had added stress lines across his forehead and a tightness around his mouth she wished she could ease with a gentle kiss.
He looked so tired, so worried, that guilt crept over her. Here he was in a life-or-death situation with his brother, and she was thinking only of herself. Still, that desire to comfort him wouldn’t go away.
“Luke has suffered extensive damage to his legs,” Jacob was saying, “along with broken ribs and other injuries. They are not life threatening, but we suspect he will be in recovery for a while.”
Christina gasped, even though they’d already heard the news. Tears overflowed onto her pale cheeks.
“We ask that you bear with us as we learn more about Luke’s medical needs and recovery. We will release more information as it becomes available. I’m sure, as much as he loves the spotlight, Luke will be happy to talk to y’all as soon as he’s able.”
A light round of laughter swept across the audience.
“Please respect our family’s desire for privacy as we adjust. Thank you.”
The men didn’t stay for questions. Instead, they moved to a side door, where they exited with Luke’s crew chief. The door closed behind them, leaving the reporters clamoring for more answers. KC felt left out in the cold, too.
After long moments of silence, Christina rose to her feet. “Are you sure you don’t want to come stay at the manor with me?” she asked.
As much as KC wanted to comfort Christi
na, tonight’s emotional roller coaster and the realization of her true feelings just as Jacob proved how shallow his were, meant she needed time alone. “I’m sorry, but it’ll be easier to get Carter to sleep here. And I don’t want to cart all his stuff over in the rain.”
Christina’s lips parted as if to speak, then her gaze slid away. “No problem. I completely understand.”
KC really hoped so. She didn’t want Christina to feel as if she was abandoning her. “I’ll call in the morning and check in, okay?”
But as Christina pulled out of the driveway, anger sparked in KC’s heart. She could reach out, do the sympathetic, caring thing for her friend. But she couldn’t do the same for Jacob because he’d cut off her access to him. And he refused to offer her the same consideration.
Yeah, she wouldn’t be offering any sappy declarations of “luv” anytime soon. If ever... Instead, she piled in the chair, cuddling Carter in her arms. This was where she belonged...where she was loved. This was where she should stay.
Shouldn’t she?
* * *
Jacob’s back ached from his hours-long slump in the chair in the corner of his brother’s hospital room. He’d heard nothing but the beep of the heart monitor and his own breathing for what seemed like forever. His gaze was trained in his brother’s direction, but he was so tired he wasn’t really seeing anything anymore. Still, he couldn’t leave.
Since they were kids, Luke had been the reckless one, the one to take all the chances. It usually got him in trouble, but Jacob was always there to pick up the pieces. That was his role. He took care of his brother.
Even if all he could do was sit by his side in the hospital.
“What are you thinking?”
A minute or more passed before Jacob realized the voice was real and not a figment of his imagination. It was the husky, battered quality that convinced him his brother had actually spoken for the first time since his accident. Jerking to his feet, he crossed the space between them in seconds. “You’re awake.”
“What were you thinking?” Luke repeated.
Words Luke probably couldn’t afford to waste, considering his current physical state.
Jacob grimaced. His thoughts had centered around only two things since they’d gotten into this room: Luke and KC. How Jacob wished she were here. Making him smile. Soothing him with her touch so his brain wouldn’t run away with scenarios of his brother never walking again. But he couldn’t say any of that to Luke. So he kept it bottled up and ached for her in silence.
“Just wondering whether you’d ever stop sleepin’ the day away,” he said instead.
Luke’s half smile released the tension deep in Jacob’s gut. “We can’t all be boring, clock-watching suits like you.”
It was an old argument between them. But there was a new undertone, slightly hazy from the painkillers.
Suddenly Aiden spoke from the doorway. “Good to finally see those peepers, brother.”
As he walked toward the bed, Jacob noted that Aiden’s spiky hair now spiked in a few different directions. He’d probably run his hands through his hair dozens of times last night. They’d both been worried, even after they moved Luke out of ICU.
“I just got off the phone with Christina,” Aiden said. “Everyone at the manor is good. Not much damage from the storm. And I just saw your doctor down the hall, so she should be in soon.”
Jacob’s heart sped up. “Was KC with her?” He’d told Aiden to have Christina invite her to the manor. He worried about her and Carter being alone in her older house with a thunderstorm raging outside.
Aiden shook his head. “No, she didn’t go home with Christina last night.” He hesitated a moment, raising Jacob’s suspicions.
“What?” he demanded.
“Christina says KC was pretty upset when she went over there. You really should have called her.” Aiden looked down at Jacob’s hand, then cocked his head in inquiry.
Jacob knew what was there: the cell phone he’d had in his hand for hours. He’d picked it up with the intention of calling home, then thought about what he wanted to say, needed to say, and couldn’t make himself dial the number.
He’d meant to call her sooner, but at first there’d been no thought for anything but Luke. This twin thing didn’t come out often, but when it did, it was no joke. The feelings of responsibility that came with it were all consuming. Only later did Jacob let the outer world break through...
By then, his heart had been running scared. Acknowledging the words he’d said to her in the bar had been tough enough, though they hadn’t discussed it. But Jacob knew they were true. He did love her. With an intensity as deep as his love for his brothers.
Now he stood in the hospital room of the brother he’d almost lost. His entire world had spiraled out of his control with the news that Luke had been in an accident. It had been like his father’s death all over again.
Jacob wanted—no, needed—his control. Tight and locked down. But if he called KC, he’d be begging her to come to him, aching for her comfort and ultimately giving his control over to someone outside of himself.
“I’ll talk to her, explain,” he said, though he had no clue what he’d say.
“Dude.” Luke’s weak voice barely topped the monitors, but he kept going. “You’d better grovel.”
Jacob knew his brother was right, but he couldn’t act in the face of his fear. His fear and selfish actions had landed him in deep trouble.
Luke’s doctor walked into the room, taking Jacob’s mind off the looming disaster back home. She moved directly to the bed, zeroing in on her patient. After a quick examination and a few questions, she addressed the elephant in the room. “Luke, I’m not going to lie to you, this is going to be a long recovery,” she said.
Luke blinked slowly at the doctor, as if he couldn’t quite take in what was being said.
“You will recover. Eventually. But with compound fractures this bad, in both legs, you’ll need time to heal, then lots of work to rebuild your muscle strength and ability to walk. And that’s not even addressing your other injuries.”
Jacob looked at his brother, his leanly muscled body so still for once, and knew exactly what was going through his mind. Luke wouldn’t care about pain, or rebuilding his strength—he’d only care about one thing. “His racing?” Jacob asked, feeling his throat close around the words.
She shook her head. “I don’t know. The physical requirements of the sport might end up being too much, especially on his feet. It all depends on how he heals.” She grinned at the prone man. “Which means you have to take orders and do the work.”
“Oh, I’m used to work,” Luke teased, though his smile was a mere stretch of tight lips. Jacob could feel the ache of Luke’s sadness echo inside his own chest. “But I’m not takin’ orders from nobody.”
And wasn’t that the truth? His brother could be as stubborn as they come—he was a Blackstone after all.
But the doctor smiled, probably as happy as Jacob to see Luke even attempt a joke at this devastating setback. “I guess that’s the best I can hope for. We’re gonna keep you here for now. See if there needs to be one more surgery, and make sure no infection sets into the places where the bone broke through your skin.”
Jacob winced inwardly but maintained as much outward calm as he could manage. Normally, that was easy. Today, not so much.
“I’ll let y’all know how things look tomorrow and give you a better time line for what’s gonna happen. Just rest and let the antibiotics do their job.”
Luke nodded, his eyes already drifting closed again.
Jacob and Aiden followed the doctor to the door, where she paused to look back at her patient. “Jacob, your twin is going to need you a lot, especially over the next few months. I understand that you live in South Carolina?”
“Yes,” Jacob co
nfirmed. “Down on the coastal side. Farther away than I’d like.”
“I would consider finding him rehab options closer to home. I think he’ll weather the upcoming difficulties much better surrounded by his family. Let me look into what’s available in your area.”
“Thank you, Doctor,” Aiden said, then escorted her out into the hall. Leaving Jacob once more alone with Luke.
He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket once more, staring at the screen for long moments. He felt shaky, off guard. The past six months had been one change after another. Moving home. His job. Carter. This new, different relationship with KC.
He knew he needed her to steady his world and keep him strong. But he was supposed to be the strong one. He wasn’t supposed to lean on someone else. And that was exactly what he wanted to do.
His hands started to shake, forcing him to tighten them into fists. His cell phone case dug into the edges of his palm.
So this was why he’d kept his relationship with KC simple and below the radar. Giving up his heart meant giving up control. Hell, he wasn’t even sure he was capable of doing that.
He’d lost his dad. He’d almost lost Luke. Was he seriously considering adding another ticking time bomb to his life?
I love you. Immediately his mind recalled the warmth of KC’s body cuddled against his in the dead of night. The spike of joy in his chest the first time Carter had smiled at him. The ache of need that grew with every minute he was away from them both.
Well, damn. It looked as if it was a little too late to fight this one off. “Wow,” he heard from the bed. “That’s some pretty intense stuff going on in that brain of yours. If you need someone to talk to, I can listen.”
Jacob glanced over to find Luke’s eyes open once more. “I know.” Luke might offer to listen, but he had enough on his plate at the moment.
“I have nothing better to do. And I’ll be asleep half the time anyway, so there’s no need to be embarrassed. Just get it off your chest, dude.”
