by Dani Wade
Why not? His brother’s drug-induced haziness made things a little easier to say. Maybe after, Luke wouldn’t remember Jacob being so weak. “I screwed up, leaving her like that.”
“You sure did.”
All he’d been able to think about was getting to Luke. His logical brain had reasoned that KC couldn’t travel on such short notice because of Carter, but it had all been excuses.
“I’m such an idiot,” he said. How could he have convinced himself it would be better for KC to hear the news about Luke from anyone but him? He’d been worried about maintaining his gold-star control by keeping her at arm’s length, worried he might toss aside his pride and beg her to come to him. Had he once thought about how all of this affected her?
“I’ve told you that a lot but you never listen,” Luke said in an almost singsong voice, suggesting to Jacob that another dose of pain meds must have been delivered through the IV.
“I know, brother,” Jacob murmured as Luke’s eyes drifted closed. “This time, ignoring you isn’t gonna work.”
“Call her,” Luke murmured. Then his eyes were shut tight, and that intangible connection between them broke.
Heart pounding, though he’d never admit it, Jacob slipped out the door and found Aiden in the hall. “Could you sit with Luke for a few minutes?”
Aiden’s brows jumped toward his hairline. “Why would you even have to ask?”
Because taking care of Luke was his responsibility. “Right.” He cleared his throat. “Can I use your phone?”
“Why?” Aiden asked with a frown.
“My battery is dead.”
“Of course,” Aiden said, handing it over. Jacob ignored Aiden’s knowing look and headed for the stairs with the phone. Two minutes later, he was outside, staring across the dark alleyway behind the hospital as he listened to the ring on the other end of the line. He couldn’t go out front—there were too many reporters hanging around. The staff had said this little area was secure if they needed to smoke or anything.
“Hello?”
KC’s tentative voice caused emotion to tighten his throat, forcing him to clear it. “KC?” Then he remembered he wasn’t on his own phone. “It’s me. Jacob.”
For a minute, he thought she wouldn’t answer. When her soft “Hey” came across the line, sweet relief ran through his veins. Maybe just a moment too soon, because that was all she said.
Struggling to fill the silence, Jacob relayed the doctor’s findings. But when he paused to draw a breath, KC broke in, “I know. I saw you on television.”
“Right.” Had she been all alone? Or had Christina still been there? “The press have been crazy here. Camped out all over the hospital grounds, trying to get in the doors... One even sneaked in through the emergency room then tried to grill a nurse for information on Luke.” He grinned at the memory of their night nurse telling an animated version of the story. “Luke might start to think he’s hot stuff.”
“I bet he will.” She spoke the words, but there was no life in them. He was definitely in the doghouse.
Not only was she quiet, but it sounded as if the house was, too. His voice softened at the thought of his son. “Carter asleep?”
“Yes.”
“Did the storm keep him up last night?”
“Some.”
What about you? he wanted to ask. Did it keep you awake? Did you wish I was there? Because I wish you were here. Did he have the courage to say it? “The house okay?”
“Yes. It’s stood for fifty years. It’ll stand for fifty more.”
This awkward conversation was not going the way he wanted, but he had no one but himself to blame.
“Listen, Jacob, I need to go to bed. It’s been a long day, and like I said, we didn’t sleep very well last night.”
“Neither did I.” He drew in a deep breath. Time to suck it up, big man. “Without you.”
“I’m sure,” she murmured.
“KC?”
“Yes?”
I’m sorry I’m such an idiot? No. Probably the wrong approach. “I love you, and wish you could be here with me.”
She didn’t ask the obvious: So why didn’t you give me the chance? Instead, she whispered, “Thank you,” and hung up the phone.
Sixteen
Aiden stepped into the room the next day right after the lunch lady cleaned up Luke’s tray. If one could call broth “lunch.” “You have a visitor,” he said.
“I don’t think he’s up to it yet,” Jacob said, noting Luke’s groggy stare trained on his brother.
“Not him, dummy. You,” Aiden said.
Who could possibly be here to see him?
“She was just gonna drop off your stuff and go,” Aiden said, “but I told her to wait.”
Stuff. KC was here? Jacob was through the door in the fastest move he’d executed since his mad dash to reach Luke. Stepping into the hall was easier this time than all the times before because his connection with his brother no longer pulled like a taut rubber band between them. As Luke’s pain diminished, the wound on the twin brothers’ psyches was beginning to heal, as well. For Jacob, it was now a barely noticeable twinge.
It would be a much longer road for Luke.
A few steps brought her into view. He’d expected a display of anger or even rejection. Instead, her face was an impassive mask, not really telling him anything.
He didn’t know where to start, except with the obvious. “What’re you doing here?”
A flash of uncertainty broke through the mask for a single second, but just as quickly disappeared. “I know you left in a hurry,” she said, the words rushing from those perfectly shaped lips. “Too quickly to get your stuff. So I brought your travel bag.” She gestured to his black bag on the floor next to her feet. “Some clothes, those protein bars you like for breakfast...”
Wow, fresh clothes. Jacob’s outfit was rumpled, and he reeked after sleeping in a chair for three days. He’d already rotated through the two outfits he’d grabbed to bring with him. He simply didn’t have it in him to leave the hospital, much less go to a store for something.
Her hard swallow drew his gaze to her throat. This seemed as difficult for her to say as it was for him to listen. “When you’re ready to leave the hospital, Aiden will have a suitcase for you at his hotel room. Including your laptop. He put it in his car for you.”
Holy smokes. She’d thought of everything. But then again, this was KC. Had he thought she’d do anything less?
“And I thought you might eventually need this.” She pulled a gray cord out of her pocket—his phone charger. “You left it beside the bed.”
“KC, thank you. This...this is very thoughtful. Did you drive up?” Man, that would have been hard for her. Crack of dawn was not something KC did well.
She shook her head. “No, Zachary flew me up. Just a quick trip.”
“You flew?” His mind automatically went back to the day they’d met...and just how scared she was of flying. Which made her presence now even more incredible. “I don’t know what to say.” Especially since he’d left her behind without a word. Literally.
The difficulty of having this conversation and speaking to her after what he’d said on the phone...
Jacob hated this. They were so stiff with each other—avoiding eye contact, talking but not really saying anything. All his fault. All of it.
“There’s nothing to say,” she said, though her gaze was a bit too solemn for his liking. “We’re partners. I just want to help any way I can.” She gestured to the bag. “This I knew I could do.”
What impressed him wasn’t her words, but her tone. She could have called him out for ignoring her, for leaving town without notifying her or even for not calling personally for over twenty-four hours. But she didn’t.
He could do n
o less. “I’m sorry, KC. I didn’t have time to prepare.”
“And we all know you like to be prepared, Jake,” she said with a smirk, but her gaze still wouldn’t lift to his.
That was probably why all this had thrown him for a loop in the first place. The plan was all-important to him. Now he needed to set that aside and he wasn’t even sure how.
“KC, I know this is going to sound cowardly, but when I get home, can we talk?” This time those beautiful hazel eyes peeked from beneath her lashes. As their gazes met, he could see the same awareness that he’d heard permeating every word between them on their phone call. “There are some things, more things I need to say, starting with I’m sorry. But you deserve better than a rushed apology in a hospital hallway.”
To his surprise, a sheen of tears graced her eyes. “I’d like that,” she murmured.
“Thank you,” he said simply, and then tried to get the conversation off more emotional topics before he pulled her close and refused to let her go. “Your mom got a handle on things with Carter?”
She swiped her fingers across each eye before nodding. “Yes, but that reminds me.” Reaching into her own oversize tote bag, she pulled out a white paper sack. “She sent these because she said none of you should be forced to live on hospital food.” She held it out like a white truce flag.
Jacob opened it, only to be seduced by the sweet aroma of a couple dozen peanut-butter cookies. “Wow,” he said, not wasting any time shoving a whole one in his mouth. As the creamy, crunchy treat dissolved on his tongue, he couldn’t hold back a moan.
“I’ll take that to mean the cookies are appreciated,” she said with a wistful smile. “I’ll be sure to let Mom know.”
“I must be weakening her barriers against me.” This time, he actually got KC to share his grin.
“Jacob, the doctor is here,” Aiden called from across the hall.
Jacob nodded before turning back to KC. “I need to go.” He’d tried to be present for every update, worried about these first few steps of healing. But now he was pulled in the opposite direction.
He wanted her with him, even if it was only for a little longer. “Could you... Would you come with me?”
The surprise on her face reminded him of all he’d kept to himself. Everything she’d never been a part of. He’d claimed it was to keep her and Carter safe, but was it really? Had he been protecting her or himself?
He’d demanded they behave like a family—24/7—yet he’d failed to mingle the two most important halves of his life.
Gently taking her hand in his, he led her across the hallway and into Luke’s room. The doctor was already speaking with Aiden and Luke about the additional surgery he’d be having the next morning. Resignation strained Luke’s already pale features. He remained silent while his brothers asked all the pertinent questions.
Luke’s sadness crept over Jacob, and he squeezed KC’s hand tight. He simply couldn’t let go. Even when the doctor extended her hand before she left, Jacob moved KC’s hand into his other one so he could shake.
“Doctor, this is KC Gatlin.”
After a quick glance at their joined hands, the doctor gave him an understanding look. “Don’t worry,” she told them both. “He will get through this.”
Whether she meant Luke or himself, Jacob wasn’t completely sure.
As she left, he felt KC’s thumb rub along his. The fact that she would offer him comfort humbled him. After all he’d done, she still stood here with him. He led her forward to Luke’s bedside.
Luke adopted a semblance of his trademark grin. “Wow, is this what I have to do to get pretty visitors?”
Jacob groaned. “Stop flirting with my woman, you egomaniac.”
KC grinned, bumping her side against Jacob’s. “Don’t give your brother a hard time.” She reached out to brush her free hand over Luke’s. “I’m very sorry, Luke. If there’s anything I can do for you...”
“Oh, just make sure I get to meet that cute little nephew of mine when I come back into town.” His grin was a short-lived flash of brilliance. “Gives me something to look forward to.”
Jacob heard her quick catch of breath, but no tears this time. “I sure will,” she said. “But for now, I’ll let you rest. I really need to get back to the airport. My brother is waiting to take me home.”
Jacob was once again reminded of how scared to death she must have been in that little bitty plane, but she’d still flown all the way here—just to bring him what she thought he would need. KC was a giving person, but this was something more.
And he had to make sure he was worthy of it.
“I’ll be back after I get her safely on her way,” Jacob said. Aiden acknowledged him with an understanding nod, and then Jacob led KC out the door.
There were complications to visiting here. Paparazzi were everywhere. If she was seen arriving or leaving the hospital with him, word would spread quickly. The vultures would hunt down her story in seconds, and he refused to leave her unprotected.
One of the nurses called a cab for them. Jacob walked KC down to a back corridor where security guarded an outside entrance. This way he could ensure her safe departure without interference from unwanted visitors. After only a few short minutes of waiting, Jacob gave into his need and wrapped his arms around her. He guided her head to rest against his chest, stroking his hand along her silky hair in an effort to soothe her.
Looking down at her guarded face, he knew she was still worried he’d walk away—indeed, he had without a word. But she made no demands. Gave no ultimatums. “I just don’t know what to say. You could have really dug into me for behaving like an—” He stopped when she shook her head.
“I was angry. I’ve had too many men walk away in my life not to be.”
The reminder of her childhood made him feel even lower.
“But then I realized something. The question isn’t whether or not you go without me, Jacob. Life happens. I understand that. What really matters is whether or not I’m part of the decision. Part of the plan. That’s what’s important. And totally up to you. I will not be an obligation to you, Jacob. This is something you have to decide for yourself.”
She was trusting him. He refused to disappoint her.
“Jacob, now,” Aiden said as he slipped back into Luke’s room.
“I’ll call,” Jacob murmured against her hair.
All too soon the cab arrived. She gave him a quick kiss, then started to walk away. She seemed completely unaware he was shaking inside from her gesture.
Her actions drove home exactly how deep he was in this relationship, because he wanted to meet her expectations, not just his obligations toward their son.
With just a few quick strides he was once again by her side. He cupped her face between his hands, guiding it up so he could brush his lips over hers. Once for the hello he’d failed to give. Once for the goodbye he hated to say. And once more as a promise. “I’ll be home soon.”
As he headed back into his brother’s room, Jacob made a decision. As soon as he was sure Luke was stable, it was time to go home to his new family and win KC back.
In the way she truly deserved.
* * *
Jacob stood outside the door to Lola’s, listening to the sounds of a busy Friday night. The parking lot was packed with cars. It should have been like any other Friday when he left work and had dinner with Aiden in the corner booth, watching his woman from across the room as she worked the bar.
Not tonight, he thought with a leap in his stomach. Tonight, he would finally make it official.
He’d stayed in Charlotte another few days after KC’s surprise visit, long enough to make sure that Luke was well on his way to recovery. It would take time, but his brother would get back on his feet.
But he was sidelined from racing for the foreseeable future. J
acob didn’t want to consider the emotional implications of that prognosis. Luke took every lick with a smile and a laugh, much the way he had when they were kids. But Jacob could see the shadows behind the laughter. His heart ached for his brother. But Jacob had come to a point of desperation: he had to get home to KC and Carter. Sure, they’d talked a few times on the phone after she’d left Charlotte—mostly about the baby. And KC never asked when Jacob was coming home or complained about him not being there.
Most men would be thrilled, but not Jacob. He hated that she didn’t feel worthy of placing those demands on him. But with her family history, he understood why she didn’t. It was up to him to show her those demands were her right. That she shouldn’t let men take advantage of her—even him.
But the things Jake wanted to say, well, they shouldn’t be said over the phone.
Jacob had finally acknowledged that he needed KC with him. But when Luke moved home soon, Jacob had to be with him, too. Once Luke’s doctor released him, they were going to move him back to Blackstone Manor and do his physical therapy here. Luke was gonna need help, which meant things had to change. Jacob couldn’t be in two places at once, and there was no room at KC’s place for his brother. Jacob had a choice to make. His brother was an obligation he couldn’t—no, wouldn’t—turn his back on. But leaving KC and Carter alone put them in danger, and wasn’t even an option anyway. The past few days had shown him he didn’t want to be just a part-time dad...or a part-time lover.
So he’d made his choice. Would KC make the same one?
“You gonna go through that door or just stare at it all night?”
Jacob threw a dirty look at Zachary over his shoulder. As usual, it didn’t faze KC’s brother.
“Sis know you’re back in town?”
Jacob turned back to the door. “No. I just got here.”
“Okay,” Zachary drew the word out. “So seriously. Why are you hovering outside the door like a mother hen?”
“I’m not, you goof. I’m just trying to decide what to say...”
